Tagged (Before we start Goretober tomorrow)
Tagged by Its_Aki-Senpai
1. UHHHH—
(just say something impulsively sora jfc)
U H H H——
Ink. He's my goddamn spirit animal, I kid you not.
2. Female! :3
3. None irl. :P
4. Can't, cuz I don't have one.
5. N O P E .
6. Uhmmmm... 5' 7 1/4 I believe??
7. No...? I have depressed moments...?
I had a serious emotional outburst earlier that was so bad that I was shuddering violently for almost an hour afterwards? And my eyes still burn from crying, even though the first outburst (there were two major ones, and several close calls throughout the day) was a little after 10:00 am and it is currently 8:13 pm?
8. Either sweet tea or mint tea. Idk.
9. Hnnn...
But I have so many favorites...
HNNN—
I guess TheNobles still top my list.
I mean...
[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]
Just lookit these goofballs—
[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]
LOOK. AT. THEM.
[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]
I L O V E T H E M .
Also, speaking of YouTube...
PLEASE SUB TO MEEEEE
I KEEP TELLING YOU GUYS TO, YET I ONLY HAVE A LITTLE OVER 40 SUBS AND CRYSTEL SOMEHOW HAS 200+ AND PEOPLE KEEP COMMENTING ON HER VIDEOS THAT SHE DESERVES MORE SUBS, LEAVING POOR LITTLE SORA IN THE DUST, CRYING TO HERSELF BECAUSE SHE CAN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO GET PEOPLE TO LIKE HER, CUZ ANIMAL VIDEOS AREN'T RELEVANT TO ANYONE'S INTERESTS ANYMORE, STUPID MEME-WORTHY VIDEOS DON'T MEAN ANYTHING IF NO ONE FINDS THEM, AND ART IS ONLY GOOD WHEN YOU RECORD THE ENTIRE THING, NOT JUST A 3 MINUTE CLIP———
*deep inhale*
I'm sorry if that sounds rude/bratty/greedy, but I wanna be lowkey famous too.
I want strangers to stumble upon my channel and say "Where are your subs? You deserve more!".
I want people to say "You've just earned yourself a sub, my friend!"
I'm tired of making an effort of trying to get love and attention on all my accounts, yet only being noticed on two.
I have 365 followers here on Wattpad.
I have 187 on tumblr.
Yet I've only managed to scrape up 43 subs on YouTube in my three years of uploading wholesome animal videos, a good chunk of those subs being people I know in real life.
What am I doing wrong?
Why doesn't anyone care about my content?
Why is it that no matter how much Crystel promotes my channel, nobody bothers to look at what I have to offer?
Why is it that she can get a hundred subs simply from commenting on other videos, yet all I seem to get for doing such is hatred for being a "furfag"?
What do I need to do to get some love?
Do I need to shut the fuck up when I'm recording? (Is my voice really THAT grating?)
Do I need to start fighting to upload each art piece I do digitally, regardless of the space on my phone? (Is art my only good quality?)
Do I need to force myself to voice act/dub comics, even with my shitty "recording equipment"? (Or is that just gonna backfire like everything else?)
Do I need to slap together my cosplays faster? (Or will I just make myself even more of a joke?)
Do I need to start animating again? (Even if it pains me to do so?)
Or should I just give up, knowing that no random stranger on the internet thinks I'm cool, or even "worthy" of more subs? (Does anyone actually care anymore?)
...Dammit, now I sound like an ungrateful brat who's just seeking attention... I'm sorry... I know that a good chunk of you guys actually are subbed to me, and I appreciate that. And I know that a large portion of you guys don't even HAVE YouTube accounts. Which is fine.
I'll just stop talking now. You guys don't need to hear about my selfish jealousy. I should be happy for my friend, for getting all the attention on YouTube she's gotten over the past few months. But it's hard to do that when my own dreams fall significantly short of what she's accomplished.
...I've had a rough day. I'm already kinda emotionally unstable at the moment, and I'm really only making things worse. I'm concerning myself with things that are beyond my control.
I just need to get my head on straight. Maybe I'll be better in the morning, after I've caught up on sleep.
Besides, I've dragged this thing on wayy longer than I needed to.
If you wanna sub to my YouTube channel, my channel name is "Sora the Dutchie". If you don't want to, then that's fine. I don't blame you for not wanting to support me after this little selfish tangent. I wouldn't wanna support myself either.
I probably shouldn't even post this part of the chapter anyway, yet here we are.
You guys are probably gonna worry about me hurting myself now. Trust me, I'm fine. I promise, I won't do anything bad to myself. I'm just having an off-day. I'll bounce back, as I always do. And I know everyone who is facing problems worse than mine will bounce back too. Just give it time.
That's all for now. I'm done venting. If you've read this far, then thanks for taking the time to hear me out. Sorry if I scared anyone off with all this negativity. I'm just not quite myself right now.
Either way, I'll see you guys in Goretober. 💙
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: AzTruyen.Top