Listen to me as
one listens to
the rain.
—As One Listens to the Rain, Octavio Paz

Name: Yoshizawa Mayumi
Date: 2012/05/14

English Creative Writing Practice #1

Write about a time you were angry:

I think I have always been angry. Rage is the only thing I inherited from my mom. It might be hard to tell that I am so angry every waking moment of my life. My nails press into my palms until they leave indents. When you look at my life, how could I not be mad?

In the eyes of society, I am a bastard child. Before my achievements, that was my sole title. They call my mom a whore for sleeping with a married man, but did they ever consider that he was the one who started everything? I have his face, and I can tell that it makes her unhappy. My mom's name is read as "blessing," so why does it seem like she's been cursed instead? The question I always ask myself is, "Am I cursing her by existing?" Some days, I hate her so much I could die. Other days, I feel sorry that she has to live like this because of me. Then again, I'm also living like this—did we curse each other?

Due to this curse of mine, I have to dilute myself—I have to make myself easier to love. I know that I'm not lovable because I'm my father's daughter. My peers love being around me because I'm kind and helpful, yet I wonder if they can see the rot inside of me.

I hate how Kei is the only one who can see it. I hate him. He's betraying my wishes by seeing who I truly am. It's not the reaction I'd usually have, but I can't help it. It's how I feel, so there's nothing I can do about it. My mask has too many cracks in it now, and I'm scared that it'll break one day. Kei doesn't seem to care; he actually acts like he wants to see that side of me. I know that he and I have been friends since before we were born, but he wasn't meant to know me this much. I hate it and I hate him. Some days, I wish that I could just punch that stupidly smug face of his.

I am both a whore's daughter and a model student. They're not meant to be on the same scale, but I made it happen. I'll show my father that even if I share his blood and face, we aren't the same.

(I find it hard to look in a mirror some days.)

Yoshizawa Mayumi / Student Council Treasurer

Tsukishima Kei / Middle Blocker

with appearances from!
KARASUNO BOYS VOLLEYBALL TEAM
YOSHIZAWA MEGUMI
MIYAZAKI AKIO
TSUKISHIMA AKITERU

AUTHOR'S NOTE!          hey it's me again!!!! i still exist!!!! i'm taking part in the revival of hq wattpad trust 🙏 if i manage to get this fic out the dungeon, i think it'll be fun to write??? mayumi honestly might be a lil tough for me to write sometimes bc she isn't one-sided... she's akechi coded so that's something!! her relationship with tsukishima is complicated (womb friends to somewhat enemies??? idfk) because she's crafted this perfect mask and to her, it's like he wants to break it on purpose. anyway!!! can't wait for them and her!!

mayumi's relationship w her mom is also complicated... idk how to put it into words so we Might be cooked! REGARDLESS!!! I CAN'T WAIT!!!

CONTENT WARNINGS!          estranged family relationships, domestic violence, consumption of alcohol, Major mommy daddy issues

COPYRIGHT!          all dialogue, plot/plot points, and original characters belong to me (futurafrees).

DEDICATIONS!          wren piper farah lulu

LET'S START THE SHOW!          please enjoy MOON RIVER!