"Boy I didn't know a lot, I think I'm still the same
I'm still searching for my galaxy, still don't know my screen
Drowning in looks that are getting worse
Getting more spotlight than sunlight everyday" – Yestoday by NCT U, 2018

Jimin stared at his plate, not able to eat anything. He ended up being the only one that didn't order anything as Taehyung and Namjoon enjoyed their meal. Jimin insisted he was hungry, but he hadn't eaten since early that morning.

He wasn't fit to be here, not with how fancy and sophisticated the other two were looking.

Jimin was pushing himself into the background now, not thinking he was fit to be here.

Jimin quietly left the booth, feeling sick to his stomach at the thought of being here anymore. He just had to get away for a couple minutes and breathe. Jimin whimpered as his stomach began to release bile and stomach acid, signaling he had barely eaten.

Jimin held his stomach and slowly got up, trying to rinse the taste out of his mouth with the tap water.

Jimin walked back out to the dining room, Taehyung holding his hand and guiding him back to their table, absolutely frantic.

'Almost motherly'

Jimin let out a small noise at how quickly Taehyung was ushering him back to their table.

"You're so pale, Jiminie! Are you sick? Is something going on?"

Jimin shook his head, scared he was going to throw up again if he spoke, "F-Fine..."

Jimin was sitting near the window as Taehyung tried to convince him to eat something.

Taehyung was used to this, being spoiled and pampered with all the luxuries of the world... Jimin was used to a different type of lifestyle, one more destructive and unhappy.

What was up with him? Did he like hurting himself or something?

He loved being happy... All he wanted was to feel happy.

Why couldn't he let himself be happy?

Jimin stared down at the table, "I-I'm feeling a bit sick... I think I'm going to go turn in for the night-."

"But you haven't even eaten, Jiminie..." Taehyung glared at Namjoon, "I told you we should have gone somewhere more lowkey!" he hissed in a low voice, "This was way too over the top!"

Jimin shook his head, but he knew it was true. Taehyung was an Omega so he could read him better than anyone else.

"We're only repeating the mistakes we made years ago! Jimin clearly isn't comfortable!"

Taehyung was mated, and he had pups, which meant some of his senses were affected by those factors alone. It was maternal instinct and Omega instinct all bound into one.

"Jiminine..." Taehyung held Jimin's hands almost in a motherly manner, "Do you want to go somewhere else?"

Jimin nodded slowly, not meeting Taehyung or Namjoon's eyes, "Please..."

"Come on... That ramen bar that we used to go to all the time is still open... Wanna go there?"

Jimin nodded, he missed having a good bowl of ramen ever since he moved away. He had been to a couple ramen bars in Busan, but none of them compared to what he got to eat here in Seoul.

They walked out, Namjoon paying the bill on what they had ordered as Taehyung stuck close to Jimin.

"You're so skinny, Jiminie..." Taehyung said, looking at how Jimin's pants seemed a little baggy on him. It wasn't that noticeable, but Taehyung knew Jimin, and Jimin used to take pride in his body... Or did he?

Taehyung sat Jimin down on a bench, trying to look through him and see what was really going on, even though he knew that was impossible.

Jimin used to think he was pretty, didn't he? Surely at one point someone besides him or Namjoon had told him he was pretty, didn't they?

If Jimin wasn't wearing such greatly applied makeup, Taehyung would be able to tell what was going on with him... If he removed the concealer he could see the eye bags under Jimin's eyes, if he removed his contour, he could tell Jimin was making himself seem thinner than he already was...

What was going on?

"Jiminie, what's Serendipity Dance Company?"

Jimin tugged at his sweatshirt a little so Taehyung had a better look, "It's the dance company I started. It's pretty successful since we have people coming to see our showcases every year and we were invited to Seoul's Annual Dance Competition this year to compete... It really is my baby."

Taehyung didn't miss the small grin creeping across Jimin's face as he talked about his "baby". Jimin had always been a good dancer, but he never thought he would go as far as to open his own company.

Jimin grinned as he pulled out his phone to show Taehyung his performance from earlier that day.

Namjoon watched them, a soft smile on his face. Why hadn't they done this earlier? Why had they never tried to go on dates like this? How did they miss these golden opportunities...?

"Wow..." Taehyung said softly as he watched the six dancers dance across the stage. They were all dress in black, but all the women had something that set them apart from the men. The men were wearing similar outfits, but they were moving a little differently. The man in the black hair that looked about taller than Jimin was a little bit more sharp movements, like fire flicking out at you from a campfire. Jimin's movements were more like the wind to water, the wind influencing which direction the water would go in. Jimin moved smoothly like calm water down a stream, and the music was the wind, influencing his movements to the music.

"It was beautiful, Minnie! And you choreographed it?"

Jimin nodded, a little flustered by all the praise he was getting, "Yeah, I did... We won second place where we were placed... We all worked really hard for this and I'm so glad it turned out the way it did."

Jimin's smile faltered as he saw Jiyeon's face on the screen. She was as invested in this team as much as the rest of them were, he just wished things didn't have to turn out the way they did.

Why Jisuk? Why Jisuk of all the men in the world?

Jimin sighed, stowing his phone back in his pocket as Namjoon began to talk again, "Our car will be here in a bit."

Jimin found himself warming back up to Taehyung rather quickly. He even unblocked his number and his phone was flooded with months' worth of texts.

"O-Oh-."

Taehyung let out a sheepish laugh, "Yeah, I was really worried about you and wanted to apologize to you once we found out you were gone," Taehyung looked down with a soft sigh, "If one of the maids didn't tell us you were gone, honestly, we wouldn't have noticed until much longer."

Jimin felt the genuine remorse and sadness in Taehyung's voice, "I appreciate your honesty, TaeTae."

While Taehyung's bluntness and honesty were sometimes unwanted qualities, Jimin didn't really care. Taehyung had trusted him enough back in the club to have little to no filter on around him, and Jimin was hoping he still held that same trust for him as he did back then.

Taehyung grinned at him, "I almost feel bad for leaving our kids with the maids and butlers, but it was worth it to be able to see you again."

Jimin opened his arms for a hug and Taehyung gratefully reciprocated it with a grin on his face. Jimin rubbed his back, inhaling Taehyung's scent of Lemons and Cherries, sweet and sour, just right for Taehyung.

They parted from the hug once Namjoon informed them the car was here. Jimin was thinking about just spending the entire night with Taehyung and Namjoon but he knew that wasn't possible.

He was the one that said they couldn't go back after all...

They continued to chatter in hushed tones in the backseat as Namjoon sat back in the front, making awkward attempts at small talk with their driver.

Taehyung, out of habit, kissed Jimin on the lips and Jimin jumped away, his face turned the color of a cherry.

Taehyung covered his mouth, eyes gaping open in shock at his own actions.

They just stared at each other, red as tomatoes as they looked at each other, identically shocked.

"I'm so sorry, Minnie! I didn't mean-."

Jimin shook his head, "No, it's ok... It actually um.... It felt quite nice..."

Taehyung looked away, seeming to get brighter and brighter within seconds the longer this silence went on.

'You can't go back.'

It had been two years, almost three, since then, but it had been rough. One of the only things keeping him going before Serendipity and Jisuk was his will to stay sober. Many people slanging drugs on the streets had offered more than once to give him something to take the edge off. He wanted to stay sober so the next time he came in contact with some other sane form of human life. He didn't know who he was waiting for, but he was waiting for someone.

He felt guilty sometimes. Sometimes he felt guilty about up and leaving the way he did, but he didn't believe Taehyung and Namjoon would just take him back after how he left. He left with such bitterness in his voice and resentment in his pen, how could they forgive him?

But instead, he went to Busan and went homeless by choice.

Jimin leaned on Taehyung's shoulder, inhaling his scent for comfort as he started thinking about his life for the past almost three years. He hadn't made the best decisions, but the thought at the forefront of his mind was love. Even when he was with Jisuk, his heart always held a soft spot for both Namjoon and Taehyung. It was an unfaithful boyfriend thing to do, to think about two men he loved before, but he just couldn't help it. No matter how much he wanted to not think about them, the thoughts of them dominated his relationship with Jisuk.

Namjoon and Taehyung had made him happy before... Before they began to push him aside.

Jimin was affectionate by nature, he thought it was only natural for them to show that same love back... But he assumed he was being a bit of a hypocrite since he tried to show affection to Jisuk, but it ended up not falling through.

Did he need to be pregnant to receive that type of love too? Is that why Jisuk left?

People usually found pregnant Omegas a lot more attractive than the average Omega... Female omegas even more so...

"Jimin, stop."

Taehyung had placed a hand on Jimin's head, beginning to rake his fingers through the soft strands. He looked over at Jimin, who had an extremely confused look on his face, with a boxed smile.

"I can hear your self-deprecating thoughts all the way up here. It's depressing, and I love you too much to let you think bad about yourself."

Jimin grinned up at Taehyung, feeling his worries beginning to melt away as Taehyung continued to stroke him like that. He felt like a kitten or a puppy, eager for affection and love from their owner. Taehyung had told him once before he purred when touched the right way when he was sleeping but Jimin didn't believe it. They tried that same exact theory with Yoongi though, so maybe he did purr in his sleep.

(He was never EVER admitting it to Taehyung or Yoongi if he found out he did purr)

He said dinner and nothing else... But he just might have to break that promise. He forgave Namjoon and Taehyung, what else was there for him to lose? His sobriety? Not a fucking chance.

"Broken heart oh even if I try to let you go
The story was carved deep inside my heart
This short dream that was carved deep inside my heart
This short dream, oh, past memories
The moments that won't ever be forgotten
My precious yesterday
Tomorrow then yesterday
Sorry that I walked away
Tomorrow then yesterday
My precious yesterday" Yestoday by NCT U, 2018