Part: 33 I'm afraid to lose you


Manan are lying in each other arms, utterly naked. Their bodies are partially covered with the white duvet. Their lips are drawn up to a blissful smile as they are feeling so complete after becoming one forever. They can't even describe this feeling of utter contentment in words. Nandini's head is placed on his chest and she's listening to his soothing heartbeats, doodling I love you on his chest with her index finger. He's playing with her hair and murmuring, "I love you," and kissing her face and head after every few seconds. They both are so much in love with each other. Now they can even die for each other happiness.

She raised her head from his chest and asked him, "Manik ji, ek wish hai, kya aap humhari wish ko pura karenge? (Manik, I have one wish, would you fulfil my that wish?)"

"Yes, of course, why not? Your wishes are my command." He said, placing his hand on her face.

"Manik ji, humhai padhna hai, humhra matlab humhai english sikhni hai, jab humhai bolta hai hum gawar hai, humhai bhut bura lgta hai. (Manik, I want to study, I mean I want to learn English. When somebody calls me uneducated, it hurts me a lot.)" She looked down sadly in shame. Manik felt guilty as he had also made her feel like this that she's uneducated.

He clasped her face and pulled up her face to make her look at him. "I'm sorry, Nandini as I made you feel like this." He apologised, genuinely guilty.

"Manik ji, aap galat thodhi na bolte thai kuch, hum gawar hi toh hai, ek line bhi humshai english mein nhi boli jati. (Manik, you didn't say wrong, I'm really uneducated, I can't even speak one line properly in English.)" She lay down beside him sadly.

He came over her and straddled her. He lovingly removed hair from her face and tucked them behind her ear. "Nandini, aisa nhi hai gawar voh ishan hota jiski soch gawaro wali ho, gawar toh hum log thai jo tumhri adhar ki khubsurti ko nhi pachan sake. (Nandini, an uneducated person is whose thinking is cheap and we're uneducated people that we couldn't able to recognise your beautiful heart.)" He explained to her and kissed her forehead. Nandini's love has changed his thinking and mindset. He completed changed him and made him also beautiful like her. She took out his best personality and he is glad.

"Manik ji, lekin humhai bhi faratedar english bolni hai jese ki aap bolte hai. Humhai samjh mein sab ata hai, lekin pata nhi bol kyu nhi pate. (Manik, I also want to speak fluent English like you. I understand everything but I don't know why I can't speak.)" She pouted sadly.

"Sweetheart, you don't have to change yourself for anybody, I love you the way you're right now." He said, caressing her cheek with his thumb and gazing into her eyes intensely.

"Hum jante hai ki aap hum apko aise hi pasand hai. Lekin hum nhi chate ki aapko humhai apni patni bolte hue sharam ae, (I know that you love me like this. But I don't want you to feel ashamed while introducing me as your wife to somebody else,)"

Manik chided her, cutting her words, "shut up, Nandini. Are you crazy? You know I'm so proud to be your husband. I always say I'm so lucky to have you, sweetheart. I don't care and I never cared that what others think. Nandini, if you want to learn English, I'll teach you but I want you to learn English for yourself, not for me or others. And never dare to call yourself uneducated, you are the world's best woman, you have a big heart. You spread love and bring sunshine to people's life. Your presence is enough to fill people's hearts with joy and love.

I'm blessed to have you, sweetheart and I love you so much." He confessed and kissed her lips chastely.

"And you-you are the most... beautiful man of this world." She said this line in English by giving pause after every word and smiled sheepishly. He chuckled as somebody said to him beautiful for the first time.

"Nandini, we say handsome, smart and dashing to the man generally." He explained her lovingly, caressing his nose with her.

"Kyu? tum bhi toh sundhar ho.. aur sundhar ko english mein beautiful kehte hai, humhai pata hai.
(Why? You're beautiful and 'sundar' means in English beautiful, I know.)" She said, rubbing her eyes adorably as she is feeling sleepy. Manik laughed at her cuteness and kissed her forehead.

He lay down beside her and pulled her into his warm arms. "Now sleep, I'll teach you English tomorrow." He said and kissed her forehead.

"Aap bar bar humhre forhead par kyu kiss karte hai? (Why do you always kiss my forehead?)" She asked cutely.

"Because I want to assure you that I'm with you forever and ever, baby." He said and again kissed her forehead.

"Same." She kissed his forehead and he laughed. She makes him laugh a lot, she has filled his life with immense happiness. She brought light into his dark life.

He said, hugged her tightly and said, "Now, sleep mera bacha."

"No." She shook her head and he narrowed his brows bemusedly.

"Humhai sone se dhar lagta hai. (Because I'm afraid to sleep.)" She said in a serious tone.

His brows creased and he asked concernedly. "When I'm with you, then why fear, bacha?"

"Kyuki humhai dar lgta hai khi aap humhai chodh na chle jae. Hum jab so kar uthai aur aap humhre sath na ho toh? Humhai apko khone ka dar hai, Manik ji. (Because I'm afraid that you will go leaving me. What if I wake up after sleeping and you aren't with me? I'm scared to lose you, Manik.)" She told him, her eyes full of fear.

"No, sweetheart, I'll never leave you. I told you that," he kissed her forehead and continued, "this forehead kiss is for assurance that I'm always with you and never leave you."

"Paka na? (Really?)" She asked and he nodded. He again kissed her forehead and all over her face and she smiled contentedly.

She finally placed her head on his chest and closed her eyes. "I'm scared too, Nandini that if one day I wake up and lose you, then again my life will fill with darkness." He hugged her tightly as he wanna store her in his arm forever and ever.

"Manik ji, aap agar humhai itna kaskar soenge toh hum soyenge kese? (Manik, if you sleep hugging him so tightly, then how will I sleep?)" She asked and laughed. He instantly loosened his grip.

"Manik ji, hum toh masak kar rhai thai, aap humhai jitna chahai utna kas kar so skte hai. (Manik ji, I was just kidding, you can sleep hugging me how much tightly you want.)" She said and placed a soft kiss on his chest. Manik smiled and both slept in each other arms peacefully.

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