Author's Note: IT'S MY BIRTHDAY Y'ALL (*≧∀≦*)! Today I turn 16 and I have a lot to look forward to. To help celebrate my birthday here's a new long chapter of your guy's favorite book. And also thanks to those who wished me a happy birthday on my profile. 

But before we start the book, thank you @kyouki_owo for the amazing and beautiful fan art. 

Now onto the read!

*this is an old author's note, please ignore

*Time Skip to 2 Months Later*

You quietly hummed to yourself as you picked up a crate and carried it towards the orphanage. You staggered a bit as you struggled to walk. It's been two months since Historia was crowned queen and two months since it was revealed you were a titan shifter. 

Of course, Hange took the advantage to try to get your titan powers to unlock, but with no luck. The regular triggers that were given to Eren just weren't effective for you. This began to slowly concern everyone. 

You were a titan shifter. Every time you bled, your wounds would heal as if you were never injured at all. This was causing not only stress to Hange but to you as well. 

If you were a titan shifter, you should be no different from the rest. But why was it so hard to transform?

It didn't make it any better that the events from the chapel still kept replaying in your mind. Being back there was a crucial part in your locked memories. But it heavily concerned you on why visiting the chapel happened to be an important core memory. 

"Whoa--!" You thought. 

You tripped and stumbled on your own feet and nearly dropped the crate, but you were able to quickly regain my balance. 

"Y/n! What are you doing!?" You heard someone call. 

You turned around and saw Historia marching towards you. 

"Oh no, she looks mad."

"I told you already! You're not supposed to carry anything!"

Your burns were healing, yet your arms still ached. Historia didn't want you carrying anything because of this, but you didn't want to feel useless.  

"Leave it to the others to carry the things inside. You just take it easy, for now, alright?" she went to try to get the crate from you. 

You dodged. 

"Hey--!"

You continued to dodge and then swiftly went around her. 

"I'm hurt, not weak."

Historia huffed.

"Ugh, fine. I guess you can carry that. But please be careful."

"Yes mother." You thought mockingly. 

Historia walked off and you were left by yourself. She did that on purpose. 

Ever since what happened, you have been distance from everyone. It became unnerving. Everyone was starting to become concerned. 

It wasn't like you to purposely distance yourself. 

Historia used the opportunity to nag at you to interact with you, since you somewhat refused to do it with everyone else. 

Out of the corner of your eyes, you noticed eyes staring from behind you. You turned around and noticed a small little boy staring at you from afar. 

You gave him a slight awkward smile and waved a bit. He noticed you staring back. His cheeks quickly turned a bright shade of red before running away. 

"Aww, how cute! (*≧∀≦*)"

"Y/n! We were calling you for the past 5 minutes! Didn't you hear!?" You turned to find Jean and Armin approaching you. 

'Since when?' you signed. 

"From over there." He pointed to a slightly far edge of the plains. 

'Yeah, no way I could have heard you from there.'   

"Listen, Y/n. We noticed you've been distance lately...is everything okay?" Armin asked. 

"Is it because of what you've learned about sharing a past with Reiner, Bertholdt, and Annie?" Jean asked. 

You nodded. 

"Y/n...if you think we see you as a traitor, it's the opposite! We don't think that--I don't think that!" Armin argued. 

'No, it's okay. You guys proved enough you don't see me that way.'

Jean gave a puzzled look. 

"She's not worried about us thinking she's a traitor." Armin translated. 

"Then what is it?" Jean asked. 

They really are concerned. It's sweet. 

But you aren't sure they'll understand. 

Understand how you feel. 

"Understand that I'm scared of myself..." you thought. 

Armin and Jean waited, seeing what you'd do next. You looked away, avoiding eye contact. 

Something about trying to remember is dangerous. You want to keep them safe. You have to keep them safe. 

"But how long is that going to last for you?"

"Y/n! Come on over here!" 

Luckily, a voice saved you. 

You three turned around and saw Historia and Eren waiting there. 

"Come walk with us," Historia said, you nodded. 

You waved at Armin and Jean who weren't pleased with your sudden escape. 

They knew you were hiding something.

Eren and Historia two talked amongst themselves as you just listened to their conversation, replying as best you can. 

Your "conversation" was interrupted by someone pulling on your skirt. You looked down to find it was the same adorable boy that was staring at you earlier. 

His blushed immediately after looking down at him, Historia and Eren stopped talking and took notice of what was going on.

"U-uh...marry me. Please, miss?" he asked shyly while holding up a flower towards you. 

You gushed at the sight and immediately squat down to his level and took the flower from him, giving him a gentle smile.

"Aww, how adorable~! What's your answer, Y/n?"

You looked at Historia and gave her a look. She immediately took notice of her words. 

"Oh...right..." she muttered quietly after realizing what she said. 

"Sorry, little guy. But she's mine." Eren said while wrapping his arms around you. 

"...What? (◎_◎;)"

"W-what?"

"What?" Historia asked. 

"What do you mean by that Eren!? (•ﾟдﾟ•)"

Eren didn't respond but instead stared at the boy with blank eyes. 

"Hey, hey, hey. What's this all about! Is this some type of joke!? Eren!? I swear, you better be joking! Who said I was dating you! Who said I was yours!? Mikasa is going to kill me if she hears you saying that!" You gave Eren a taken back stare. 

"B-but...-" the boy replied with teary eyes. 

You regained yourself back from shock and stared at the boy with pity. You would take him with you if I wanted to, but that wasn't possible. 

"I'm way too old for you little guy." You thought.

"We can still be friends (*≧∀≦*)!" You pinched his cheek gently. His cheek was so soft!

He immediately blushed and gave you a determined look. 

"Miss, you can date this guy for now! But once I grow up big and strong, I will marry you then!" he kissed your cheek before running off. 

You nearly died right there. 

Wait did he just assume you're dating Eren!? Yeah, no thank you. 

"Looks like you have an admirer, Y/n!"

"Oh shut up..." You huffed a bit. 

"He's just a kid," Eren grumbled before walking away. 

Historia laughed. 

"Don't mind him, Y/n. He's just jealous. Come on." she held out her hand. 

Jealous...? Typical. 

Wait, so does Eren like you or not? His feelings towards you is kind of complex. 

You gladly took it, and she dragged you towards the orphanage. 

 (Time Skip)

"Wow...I didn't think he can pull it off..." You thought as you looked at the giant crystal body and wall built from Eren's titan form. 

He's improving with his titan abilities, but what about yours?

Hange cheered out loud as they are successfully able to make Eren block the hole in the wall. But this left Eren with a nose leaking with blood. 

You rushed over to him with a worried expression, but Eren reassured you that he was fine. All while Captain watched the two of them with a stoic expression. 

"Levi, mind taking Y/n away for a while. I need to talk to Eren, privately." Hange lowered their tone to speak to him. 

Levi nodded and called the girl over. Y/n's head perked up and nervously followed Captain, confused on why he called you over. 

Hange turned towards Eren. 

"Is Y/n alright? Has she done anything weird lately?"

"Other than distancing herself from us. Nothing too weird."

"Good. I'm sorry, it's just. I'm worried. So much have happened since the chapel, even before that. She must be going through so much." Hange said. 

"No, you're fine. I'm worried about her too." Eren replied. 

"Do you think she's hiding something from us?" Hange asked. 

"Yeah, I think she is."

"And I'm going to find out what..."

*Another Time Skip*

Later that night, the group was talking with Marlowe while you were drawing away in your journal. 

You didn't know why, but something in your mind just told you to draw. You didn't even have really have anything in mind. 

You were at first drawing Marlowe but then your mind went blank and your fingers just guided you away. Completely unaware of what you were drawing. 

That was until the conservation suddenly sparked an interest. 

"Eren, you said you saw a soldier that might have known your dad. Back with Rod?" Jean asked.

Dr. Yeager...it's been a while since you heard Eren mention him. 

Dr. Yeager...

You fell into an unnerving silence; obvious that you know something but not trying to cause attention to bring it up.  

"Yeah...I think...he might have been with my dad when the wall fell."

You went back to drawing and tried to avoid the conversation. Your breathing increased a bit as you scribbled a bit harder. Your hands beginning to shake. 

Then Armin suddenly spoke to you. 

"Hey, Y/n? What are you drawing?"

You flinched, slamming your sketchbook onto the table. This caused everyone to turn abruptly at you. 

You let out a shaky breath, Armin gently touched your shoulder. 

"Hey, hey...I'm sorry. You okay?" He asked. 

You nodded, holding onto his hand that was placed on your shoulders. 

Armin looked over at the journal while rubbing your shoulder gently. 

"Hey, is this Marlowe?" He asked while looking at your finished drawing of Marlowe. 

You nodded nervously. Armin continued to look through the journal and noticed more drawings. 

"Wow, you drew everyone in here. And really well detailed too. It's no surprise, you use to draw all the time when we were young too."

He stopped when he saw the drawing of Marco. 

"Oh...you even drew Marco, huh?"

You nodded sadly.

"It looks just like him."

You turned your attention towards Jean as she remembered the request Marco asked for you. 

"Take care of Jean for me, okay...?"

You sighed. How were you supposed to do that?

"I'm the wrong person to do so, Marco..."

But you'll do what you can. 

You stood up and made your way over to Jean, giving him a hug from the back. 

"Hey! What the-!?"

"Shh..." You hushed him. 

"Just go with it. Be lucky I'm even doing this."

You just squeezed him tightly. Jean blushed a bright red and allowed you to hug him. Holding one of your hands as you did so. 

Armin chuckled and continued to look through your drawings, it wasn't until he stopped at one of the new ones. 

It was your titan?

But it was in one of the earlier pages. 

Have you known all along that you could transform into a titan?

He looked at you again, his eyebrows furrowing in concern.

Meanwhile, Eren was thinking deeply about something. Then suddenly, he sprung up from the table. 

"So that's who I saw with my dad. It's Commander Shadis!"

The next morning, the group made it to the training grounds where Shadis was. As much as you disliked seeing him again, you followed. They demanded answers to his history with Eren's dad. 

Although reluctant, Shadis told them the entire story. When he was done, the group was left shocked. 

"That is everything I know of..." 

"Are you sure that is all?"

"Well then, why would you keep this all to yourself!? Why didn't you tell anyone!?"

"I kept silent about this for a reason, I forgot about it for a while until Eren joined the scouts."

"Well, then I guess we have no business here anymore. Let's go." they all stood up and walked out the room, you were the last of them and began to follow them out. 

"Y/n, wait." 

Your breath hitched. 

You turned around to find Shadis looking at you. 

"I knew you looked familiar. I saw you before. It was one of my last visits to Grisha. You were there weren't you."

You didn't look back at him. Your face still facing towards the exit. 

"You were there...weren't you? I won't tell anyone. Just give me a sign...please?"

You gulped before slowly nodding. 

"Do you remember why you were there?"

You shook your head. 

"I see..."

It was quiet. 

"He told me to tell you something if I was to encounter you again." he continued. 

For what seemed like forever, you turned to him. 

"He told he wishes you well on whatever path you choose."

That...those words right there. Made your head throb. 

"And if you need answers, he has it for you. I'm not sure what he means, but maybe you do." he continued. 

"Y/n! Let's go!" Hange called out, making you walk out of the room quickly. 

Unbeknownst to you, someone heard your conversation.