t h i r t y s i x

Adapting to life on the ship was both easy and difficult for them. The easy part was that it wasn't that much more different than their life in the Garden in the sense that they had their set schedules to follow. Raven and Roseanne had the very first shift of the day guarding the ship and making sure navigation was going the way it was supposed to. That was from four in the morning to eight in the morning.

Their established routine was pretty simple—they'd get up at three and Roseanne would get in the shower, since she was more of a morning person. She only needed one alarm to get out of bed and be fully awake. Raven was the complete opposite of her in that aspect. He showered at night because he preferred having as much time as possible to sleep in the mornings. Then again, he was always staying awake a bit longer than her, either watching news stories on his holo phone, or reading books. The news stories were for a limited time. A one point during their expedition in space, they'd be so far from Earth that he would no longer receive any signal to watch news from back home. It was for that reaosn that he tried to find information about his home province every night for hours while Roseanne slept. He could always hear her snoring softly by his side for at least an hour before he'd fall asleep. His first wake up call was the alarm that Roseanne set at three on the dot every morning. From there, his second wake up call was when she'd shake him awake after getting out of the shower and changing into her work uniform. He'd watch her small figure walk away back to the bathroom to give him some privacy to change.

He didn't shower in the mornings because he hated it. He always wondered how she could do it and not be uncomfortable through their shift with her candy floss colored hair neatly combed, but still visibly damp.

Raven always laid in their bed tiredly, always having gotten too little sleep. But always finding a way to compensate for it in the afternoons, much to Roseanne's dislike. Sometimes when it felt like a lazy afternoon he'd join him though, and she couldn't deny that she liked it. He would lay there until about twenty minutes before their shift and then he'd painstakingly get up and change into his work uniform. It wans't anything out of the ordinary—just a black track suit and sneakers. The more expensive space suits were to be kept for the extraction of the virus from the asteroid belt. And they had clothes to lounge in, or work out in, as well as clothes for birthdays or special occasions. But their work uniforms were simple. No one was going to pay them a visit anyway.

She emerged from the bathroom with about eight minutes before the start of their shift, a gentle smile on her face. They had been in space for a whole month already and their team had divided into two friend groups. One was Honey, Seville, Scarlet, Mauve, Ivory, and Cedar. The other had Raven, Roseanne, Ciel, Sage, Indy, and Olive. Honey sometimes found time to spend with Roseanne. But more times than not, she was with who Ciel had nicknamed the ops. Ciel was always by himself whenever he wasn't with Sage. Sage was always with Olive when she wasn't with Ciel. And Indy was always either with Ciel, with Olive, or Raven and Roseanne. For the most part though, Raven and Roseanne kept mostly to themselves now.

Scarlet was always trying to get them to hang out with her group, but Roseanne didn't want to and neither did Raven. Raven also said that there was no point in them spending time aorund people they didn't like and didn't like them.

The two made their way down the hall to the front of the ship and arrived five minutes past four in the morning. Ivory and Cedar were already on their feet. The girl with a straight white bob had her arms crossed over her chest, a scowl present on her face. As she rolled her eyes at the two who were arriving, she said to them. "Next time be on time, have you seen what time it is?"

Raven looked at the time at his holo phone and immediately shot back a response. "Its only five minutes. Indy has complained about you guys being an hour late to your shift before. Which reminds me that you have to cover an hour of his shift to even things out."

She huffed in annoyance. "Whatever. I don't want to have to wait for you again."

And she stormed off with Cedar walking away behind her. The brown haired boy with mahogany skin shot daggers at Raven, while he mumbled a quiet good morning to Roseanne as he left the room. Cedar didn't dislike Roseanne, he thought she was nice, and smart, and a good leader. But given the fact that he absolutely hated Raven, Roseanne wans't all that fond of him.

"What the fuck is their problem?" Raven mumbled, more to himself than anything else.

Roseanne gave a shrug of her shoulders and they both went to the two chairs sat in front of the control panels. The space ship was on autopilot and all systems seemed to be running smoothly. All they had to do was sit there and keep watch.

They normally spent their shifts making endless conversation about different things. At the moment, Roseanne was trying to get Raven to tell some details about his life in Province of Mines. She found it fascinating how many things he remembered from back home. But it wasn't only that, she was surprised by how much he was up to date with things that were happening back home. As part of the Garden, they weren't allowed to keep in touch with their families. But Raven found other ways to keep tabs on them. It was difficult but he had found information about them on the holo net and he knew they were doing fine. But he wished he could be with them.

Roseanne felt a bit bad that she didn't keep up with what her family was doing. She cared about them and she missed them, but she had only spent four years of her life with them. She hardly remembered who they were, or what they looked like.

-

By the second month on board, they had fallen into such a rhythm that when something was different or off, she immediately noticed.

The first thing she noticed after the second month was that he had been getting up before her for the last couple of days, which was extremely out of the ordinary for Raven Black. Then she noticed the way he'd scurry off to some unknown part of the ship whenever their shift was over and their chores were done for the day. Whenever she tried to play with him like they did by poking his shoulder or flicking the side of his head to get his with a playful smile, he'd grab her hand and pin it down by her side. It wasn't by any means a forceful gesture, but it was still out of character for him to do. Roseanne contemplated the possibility of going into the security room and following him through the cameras, but she decided against it because it seemed intrusive.

His strange behavior went on for an entire week before she started getting quiet around him. She moved her things into the other room and sat by herself during her meals. None of those things seemed to have an effect on him. He didn't try to go find her or ask her why she left. He let her sit by herself for days before he even approached her.

By then, there was a tiny bit of growing resentment in her heart towards him. If he cared about her like he said he did, why didn't he try to find out what was going on?

Granted she could have done the same, but she had tried to make conversation with him many times, only to have him reply in short one worded sentences. And she eventually stopped trying because closing herself off  from him seemed easier than facing the truth. She closed herself off from him and from the rest of the troops. She talked with Indy a bit, he was like a little brother to her. But she didn't go too much into detail telling him about her life with Raven. She felt like it was no one else's business but her own.

She was sitting with Indy at lunch on the eleventh week of their time in space when Raven walked up awkwardly to their table. He glanced at Indy for a half a second, giving him a half hearted greeting. "Hey bro." He nodded towards the blue haired, six foot boy, who was the tallest on the team.

Indy looked up at him with a friendly smile, oblivious to the clear distaste that Raven seemed to have for him in the moment. And Roseanne thought back to that day at the beach. How Raven thought Roseanen and Indy had a thing after Ivory showed him that picture. It looked like they were kissing, but it was only the angle in which they were sitting. Roseanne was tired of that. How could Raven ignore her like that for days, only giving her cordial greetings and a few words whenever they saw each other, and then act jealous upon seeing her with Indy? It didn't make sense to her.

She heaved a sigh and grabbed her tray of food off the table as she rose from her seat. The food was all picked at, none of it eaten. She couldn't eat because her thoughts consumed her, wondering what she did wrong for Raven to suddenly act like they were strangers. Then she realized that she wans't the problem. Perhaps it was him.

Many times she had overlooked things about him because she was in love with him. Like the fact that in the mornings he hardly made conversation with her. She atributed it to the fact that he wasn't a morning person. She would be the one to have to start a conversation with him a lot of the time. Whenever he noticed that she had grown quiet was when he tried to continue a conversation with her. It was a small detail, but it filled her heart with doubts. It made her think that she burdened him with her presence. Perhaps that wasn't true. Perhaps Raven was just quiet, as he was with everyone else too. But there were less and less fun moments with him leading up to the moment they were in now.

Roseanne walked away without a word and tossed her food in the trash bin before setting her tray with the dirty dishes. Whoever was assigned dishes duty and kitchen duties woule clean them later as part of their chores for the day.

She instantly heard hurried footsteps coming towards her as she walked away. Followed by an all too familiar voice of a boy she hadn't had a quality conversation with in days. Raven Black. "Rose..." He called for her with a hint of sadness in his voice.

She didn't want to turn around, she really didn't. But her heart was in control of her mind and that voice made her heart flutter. In wasn't even an endearing voice that he had. Just a soft spoken boy from the mines. And her a bubbly girl from Province of Flowers. But he had such an effect on her that not being around him made her upset. She knew she was weak when she turned around to the sound of his voice, stopping just outside the double doors to the cafeteria.

As he reached her, his hand rested on her upper arm with a butterfly touch, just barely on her. "Can I talk to you for a sec...?" He asked her.

She looked up into his charcoal black eyes with hope. Despite everything, she knew she really liked him, and in the back of her mind, if they could go back to what they had before, she could forgive the last couple of weeks.

Roseanne nodded slowly.

"But not here." He told her, and he gestured down the hallway for her to follow him.

She nodded again and he led her to a secluded part of the ship. As they entered the room with Raven scanning his Province of Flowers belt buckle for clearance, her jaw fell open at what she saw. It was a room with a giant window overlooking outer space. There was a small bench for them to sit, ovelrooking the stars and he led her there. Roseanne couldn't help but continue watching out into the distance in amazement as he sat beside her.

"I'm not good with words..." He started with a sigh, cutting her out of her thoughts. There was a long pause between them and she said nothing. She merely waited for him to continue. And that he did, after sucking in a deep breath to steel himself. "I know I've been hella fucking distant lately." He said, and there was another pause, only this one was shorter. "Its just that I've had a lot on my mind. The truth is...I really fucking like you. But I wasn't sure if you felt the same way because I see the way you interact with everyone. You treat everyone the same. But I think you're so nice, and so pretty, and its cool if you don't see me like that. I just—"

Roseanne stopped him midsentence as she placed her hands on either side of his face and pulled him in for a kiss on the lips. He was taken by surprise at first, but he soon melted into it, hands resting on her hips.

It was a moment before they pulled away, and he licked his lips in surprise.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" She scolded him with tears pricking at her eyes. "I thought it was obvious that like you too. I thought we even talked about this. So you mean to tell me you were being weird because you thought I didn't like you like that? Instead of just asking me?"

He gave a nod of his head.

She rolled her eyes playfully. "You're a dummy."

He smiled back at her as he grabbed her face in between his hands and pulled her in for another kiss. It was something they had both been waiting on, and finally it was a reality.

-

hi guys.

there's a big reason why this story didn't get that many updates since the last time i posted. i dated a dude i went to high school wwith because raven wasn't asking me out and i was tird of waiting honestly. then after a few months, he finally did ask me out.

and it was cute. it was nice while it lasted. but we started getting into arguments over dumb little shit. soooo then we broke up on feb 8th, this month. and we decided we would try to be friends.

buuuuuut things dont feel the same anymore. like i feel like its hella awkward when we talk. he feels distant over text. in person, he's the same raven i know. sometimes. but he's hella dry over text. so nowadays i just kinds try to leave him alone.

i still love him. and i wonder if he loves me. but for now, we're not together and we're trying to be friends. i'll go into detail with the upcoming chapters of what fully went down.

thank you for reading.

-clary