josh's pov

"i'm not a fucking idiot, felix," josh mutters, loading bullets into an empty magazine. his fingers are moving swiftly, fumbling with each gold casing. one drops to the ground, causing josh to slam his fist against his desk. "fuck!"

"boss, calm down. i think we need to think about this more before we-"

"i'm going to get him now," josh insists, picking up the stranded bullet and placing it in its designated spot. he slams the magazine into the pistol, tucking it in the waistband of his pants.

"you know urie is probably well aware of what's going on."

"i don't care." the man smiles sarcastically, beginning to load another handgun. "he can do whatever he wants to me, but he's not going to fucking hurt tyler."

"josh. that's the thing. i'm not worried about you, i'm worried about him..." felix tries to reason, scoffing as josh hands him a gun. nevertheless, he helps load it.

"you're not talking me out of this. this is my fucking fault. i need to do this," josh states. then, softly, he says, "i need him back."

the two share a quiet glance.

"...fine," felix sighs. "fine, boss, okay. okay. we'll get him back. he'll be okay."

josh nods, despite not entirely believing. "the girls are staying here. find jack and andy, they're coming with us. tell everyone else to keep shit under control while i'm gone."

felix nods hastily, setting his pistol down before leaving the room. josh inhales deeply, strapping a bulletproof vest on himself. he rolls his pant legs up to tuck two combat knives in his boots, one on either side. he gulps, glancing at the picture of tyler he has sitting out on his desk.

he needs to set this right. if only tyler would've given him the chance to speak... but he doesn't blame him. no, not at all. he understands. he knows he would've reacted the same way. in all honesty, he knows tyler deserves better. he deserves someone who can give him the world, not someone who is too busy working half of the time. he deserves someone who takes care of him, not someone who puts themselves in a position to lose him.

josh has done a lot of thinking in these past couple of days. sure, josh isn't an evil bitch, but tyler doesn't deserve having to use his body to make himself money. josh wants to give him so much more than that. and he will, if tyler lets him.

felix, andy, and jack enter the office, all geared out and strapped up. the three men watch quietly as josh tucks the picture of tyler in his pocket. "i don't have a plan," he states.

"what?" jack frowns.

"so what-"

felix interrupts. "that's okay, i do."

josh smiles slightly. "i figured."

~~~

tyler's pov

god, it really fucking sucks being stuck to a bed. tyler has nothing to do except drown in his fucking anxiety. he's already had two panic attacks, both lasting for what felt like hours but were like ten minutes in reality. he's been desperately trying to free his wrist for so long that the skin is past the point of raw. it's numb, but tyler can tell he's digging into himself from the few beads of blood trickling down his forearm.

he doesn't care, though. at this point, adrenaline is coursing throughout every single one of his veins. he doesn't feel pain, only determination. okay, and anxiety. but when doesn't he?

the boy continues tugging on his wrist, feet planted firmly against the headboard as he tries to break the metal frame. tyler sighs, kicking the wall in frustration. yeah, right. it's not going to happen. he hangs his head in defeat, a sudden wave of dizziness hitting him. god, he really needs to calm down. he's concussed, his ribs are broken, and now his wrist is throbbing. oh yeah, the adrenaline is wearing off. he definitely feels it all now.

whining the whole way, he positions himself to lay on his back with his arm above his head (still cuffed to the bed, of course). the ceiling above him grows darker and darker as black spots begin clouding his vision. fuck, what's wrong with him? what's going on? is he going to fucking die?

just as he blinks to try and rid of the black dots, the door is thrown open. he glances over, heart dropping as he expects another beating. wait...

"josh?"

the man approaches the bed, dumbfounded, mouth slightly ajar. he reaches out, fingertips ever-so-gently poking against the boy's swollen eye. tyler winces, but doesn't take his gaze off josh. he feels different than he thought he would. he imagined himself filled with so much disgust and hurt when he saw josh again. but now? now that it's actually happening? god, he feels safe. he's safe. josh is going to save him.

"fuck..." the man whispers. he cups tyler's cheek, the one that isn't as bruised. "i'm so sorry, baby. i'm so sorry."

tyler shuts his eyes now, but only because they fill with tears. he cries silently—hot, fat tears streaming down his cheeks.  with his thumb, josh brushes away each one as it falls. "fuck... i'm going to get you out of here, okay? i'll take you home and keep you safe. how does that sound?"

the boy whimpers, nodding slowly to not hurt his head.

"do you know where the key is for this?"

tyler feels josh moving the handcuffs. "in the dr-awer by the do-or."

he opens his eyes, desperate to see the man again, when he spots brendon standing in the doorway. he freezes, eyes shifting back and forth between the two men.

"shit," josh mutters. he slowly turns around, not surprised to find a gun aimed at him. "you're a piece of shit, urie."

brendon grins. "am i? none of this would've happened if it weren't for you, my friend. i know you've got a gun on you. kick it to me."

"i don't-"

"now," brendon urges, lowering the gun to point at tyler.

"fuck, okay! okay," josh mutters. he tosses the gun from his waistband on the ground, kicking it across the room.

"i'm not stupid. hand your shit over or i'll spill pretty boy's brains all over the goddamn wall."

tyler is nearly sobbing at this point. they were so close... josh pulls the knives out of his boots, tossing them against the ground so that they slide towards brendon. his hands raise above his head. "that's all i have. honest. you've hurt tyler enough, urie. don't do this in front of him."

don't... do... what? oh god, brendon really is going to kill josh in front of him, isn't he? just like he said... fuck. fuck, fuck, fuck. tyler can't fucking catch his breath. why can't he breathe? what's wrong with him? are his ribs crushing his lungs? is he going to die like this? god, please let him die. josh can't die before him. no. tyler won't be able to take it.

josh glances at him, cussing under his breath. he looks to brendon, then quickly turns his attention to tyler. "hey, hey, it's okay. you're okay. breathe, baby. you can do it. can you close your eyes for me? yeah, good. good job. focus on your breath and keep them closed, okay? no matter what, keep your eyes closed."

"isn't that just the cutest fucking thing i've ever seen," brendon deadpans.

tyler shuts his eyes tightly despite how hard his head throbs. warmth fills his free hand, tightly holding onto him. he squeezes josh's hand back. don't look, he tells himself. he's okay. he just has to breathe. don't look.

the sound of a bullet ripping through the air pierces tyler's eardrums.

he squeaks, flinching so hard he surely worsens his concussion. eyes still closed, he begins to panic as josh's hand slips from his own. his chest moves up and down rapidly as he pats the bed beside him, desperately searching for that hand. suddenly, his other hand is free from the cuffs. oddly enough, that no longer matters to him. he sits up slightly, hand searching the bed as tears spill continuously.

"j-josh...?"

warm arms snake beneath him, slowly picking him up bridal-style. "keep your eyes closed, baby. i don't want you to see this."

josh.

tyler cries harder, this time in relief. his head rests against the man's shoulder, tightly holding his bloody wrist against his chest. he's trembling horribly, whining as a stabbing pain shoots through his side.

"shhh, shhh... you're okay. we're going home. you're safe, dear. i've got you. it's okay..."

he hears a small sigh. "sorry, boss. it was harder to get past dallon than i thought."

felix?

"it's alright. you can open your eyes now, ty."

he does just that, slowly taking in his surroundings. he's in josh's arms, outside, with felix, jack, and andy. the three are watching him wearily, but tyler couldn't give less of a shit. despite the overwhelming pain, he's overcome with joy.

he's safe.

safe with josh.

and he's going home.

~~~

an immense ache pounds against his skull as tyler's eyes open. he blinks slowly, eyes adjusting to the light. glancing down at himself, he finds himself wrapped in bandages. he looks to his left, finding jenna and billie standing over him. to his right, josh. he frowns, slightly dazed as he comes to his surroundings.

"josh?" his voice is hoarse, coming out as more of a crack.

"hey, dear," josh smiles. he kneels beside the bed, softly caressing his cheek. "you're home."

tyler's lips curl slightly. he looks back to the girls. "hi."

billie chuckles. "hi, tyler. i'm glad you're not dead."

"me too," jenna nods. "god, we were so worried about you. josh told us what happened and-"

"jenna," josh interrupts, shooting her daggers. "not. now. he doesn't need to hear it right now. his focus should be on healing."

"you don't think it would help him heal?" billie inquires, raising an eyebrow.

tyler listens to them silently, watching josh rub his temples. "he literally just woke up.... ugh, fine. give us some time."

the girls nod, each smiling at tyler and kissing his head as they leave. once the door shuts, josh inhales sharply. he sighs, pulling a chair up to the edge of the bed. one hand grabs hold of tyler's while the other strokes his cheek.

"i wanted to wait until you were better, but i guess now is as good a time as any other. i owe you an explanation and an apology."

tyler hums, nodding slightly. he leans into the touch, cheeks growing hot in fear. does he really want to know?

"i did not sleep with pete. he came in my room crying with an empty bottle of vodka in his hand. i was sitting here reading a book. i asked him what was wrong and he said he didn't know. i just figured he was drunk, so i let him sit down and talk to me. he was just talking to me about his family and his ex and then he said he was tired. i told him i'd walk him upstairs to his room, but he started crying again and saying he didn't want to be alone." josh pauses, sighing.

"i felt bad. it reminded me of you, i guess. so i took the bottle from him and had him lay down. he wanted me to lay with him, said something about being afraid i'd leave. so i did it. i knew how much you struggled with those same fears, and i just... i don't know. i didn't see anything wrong with it at the time. i thought i was helping.

so, when he asked me to cuddle, i said fine. but it wasn't really... it wasn't, like... romantic, you know? not to me, at least. i laid there, he put his head on me and put his arm on me. i guess i must've fallen asleep or... something... because then i woke up shirtless and with you at the foot of the bed. you were already so mad, and... well, i mean, of course you were mad. anybody would be. but you wouldn't let me get a word out and i didn't know how we ended up shirtless so i was trying to figure that out while you were breaking in front of me.

god, i felt awful. i'd never felt like such a piece of shit in my entire life. i did some fucked up things when you left. i beat the shit out of pete after he told me the truth. he wasn't drunk at all. he wasn't afraid to be alone. he wasn't sad over his family. he dumped out the rest of that bottle, then put on an act to try and set me up so he could get rid of you. it worked, obviously. he said i woke up and took my shirt off myself then fell back asleep, but i don't believe that. i... i, um, well... i think he did something to me, you know? but idon'tevencareaboutthat-"

"wait," tyler interrupts as josh quickly spews out words. "wait... what?"

"yeah, but i don't know. just a feeling, you know? anyway, i beat him until he couldn't move anymore. he stopped breathing at one point and i was really fucking hoping i killed him, but i didn't-"

"josh..." tyler frowns.

"what?"

"he... he did something bad to you?"

josh shrugs, trying to play it off. "well, i don't know. he never said he did, but it doesn't make sense. you know? uh, like... how was i dead asleep for two hours straight and so disoriented when i woke up? you know? it's fine, though-"

"i'm sorry," he interrupts, tears spilling with no hesitation. "i'm sorry. please give me a hug. please. i'm so sorry."

josh leans in, careful not to hurt tyler as they hug. "stop. stop that. it's okay. it's not your fault."

"it is, though," tyler cries. "i-i'm an asshole! i just... y-you... he... and then i just blamed you! i'm so sorry, oh my god..."

"stop, please," josh whispers, kissing his forehead. "you know what? it's his fault. it's not yours, it's not mine. it's his. okay? and i don't think he'll pull shit like that with anyone else every again."

tyler sighs, pouting as josh wipes his tears. "you're right... i just feel so bad for leaving you."

"you're here now, bub. that's all that matters to me. i'm okay, promise. i'm strong." josh offers a smile, thumb brushing across the boy's lower lip. "god, please forgive me because i want to kiss you so bad right now."

"i forgive you if you forgive me."

"i forgive you," josh nods.

"i forgive you, too."

time stops as those familiar lips that have been longed for brush against his own. they kiss slowly and softly, almost as if they're afraid to open fresh wounds. it's sweet, it's loving, it's everything tyler has been craving. his stomach does somersaults, the wonderful taste of josh clouding his senses. it's everything he's been craving.

josh pulls away slowly, resting their foreheads together. his breath falls across tyler's face as he chuckles. "god, i needed that."

"i love you," the boy responds. the pit of anxiety that normally sits in his stomach has, for the moment, vanished. right now, he knows he's safe. he knows josh told him the truth. he knows that things will be okay.

"i love you more, dear. i'm going to lay with you. you need to get some rest, okay?" he returns the chair to where he grabbed it, carefully moving on the bed to not disrupt tyler. he helps the boy cover himself with a blanket, then snakes his arm under his neck and around his shoulders.

"i don't want to go to sleep," tyler admits. he so desperately wishes he could roll towards josh and curl into a ball, but there's no way he'd be able to with how bad his ribs are hurting.

"please, ty. i'm not going anywhere. i'll be here when you wake up, i promise. i'm not going to leave your side," josh assures, lips moving against the side of the boy's head as he speaks. "you're safe."

tyler goes to argue that he isn't tired, but a yawn interrupts him. "you promise?"

"pinky promise." they interlock pinkies, kissing their thumbs to seal the deal. "i won't let anything happen to you. i love you."

"i love you too," tyler mumbles, sighing contently as lips peck his temple.

he's safe.

safe with josh.

and he's home.

__a/n__

i know that kinda seems like the end but i promise it's not!!! it will be pretty soon, though. i'm thinking anywhere from 2-4 more chapters but maybe more :)