It felt wrong to send him away. It felt worse for him to stay.

Hayley sat down hard on the rocker, hugging herself. She couldn't ignore what he said, no matter how much she wanted to. And she desperately wanted to. If she was awake for these visits, was Danny a hallucination? What did that make her? She pulled on her lip, wincing at the stiff ache in her back and neck. She rolled her shoulders to loosen the muscles, her head spinning with the movement.

Anthony was right that she hadn't been taking care of herself. At the time, she hadn't cared, not as long as she could hold her sweet boy in her arms. Then she remembered that frightening wave of dizziness when she went to pick him up. Had she wanted to die? Part of her had entertained the idea, part of her did still. What if...what if Danny was real in some fashion? What would happen to him if she died?

Hayley pinched the bridge of her nose, a fresh wave of weakness settling over her as she let the truth wash through her. Anthony was right. Danny wasn't there. He wasn't real. She should accept that. She needed to accept that, even if it meant talking to a shrink. She reached up to rub the sore muscles of her neck. A shower would do her wonders. It was easier to think in the shower. The water drummed out the background noise. Hayley did the painful shuffle to the bathroom, letting her nightgown fall off her to the floor. She snapped on the water, standing under the heated stream.

Danny wasn't real. Danny was real.

Her mind circled between the two thoughts. She could still smell him, that wet earth scent she should have found unpleasant. She felt his touch and heard his voice. Sight, smell, touch, hearing, Danny engaged her senses with his presence. Was a hallucination so complex? She didn't know enough to say, but Anthony couldn't see Danny, couldn't interact with the little boy at all, though he experienced the same loss.

The very same loss he dealt with alone because she sent him away. Had he really ignored her? Or had she shut him out too? He had to be feeling pain too, so much pain. She'd learned in their years together that she had to pry his feelings out of him, something she forgot in her own misery. She sighed and snapped off the water. She needed to close the rift between them. Hayley wrapped a towel around herself, swiping a hand over the mirror to get a good look at her face.

Her appearance was worse than she thought. She looked sunken, as if her time in the nursery sucked the vitality out of her. Her neck still ached. She reached to rub the muscles and frowned, tilting her body to look at the area in the mirror. Deep violet blue bruises colored her shoulders. She moved her hair, leaning in closer, trying to figure out how she'd gotten them. When she saw the shape of them, she staggered back from the sink, her heart kicking up against her ribs. An internal switch flipped.

"He's not real," she told her wide-eyed reflection. "He's not real." She took an unsteady breath and slipped on her nightgown. She'd avoid the nursery tonight, join Anthony on the couch, and show him the bruises. He would help explain them away. Remind her this was all in her head. But first she had to pass the nursery to get to the living room.

Her shuffling steps were slow. Her hands gripped her nightgown.

Just walk past it, don't look, and keep walking.

She repeated the mantra in her head as she stepped by the nursery door. Heat greeted her. Her steps faltered. Hayley swallowed, staring at her feet. After a long moment she turned to look into the nursery. Empty. Her relief was palpable. The room was empty, warm sunlight pouring in through the open window. The window Anthony shut earlier.

Hayley took a step into the room, her skin prickling despite the heat. She ignored it, kept moving until she shoved the window back down. Why was it open? She looked around. The screen was sliced open on the other side.

"Why did you shut me out, Mommy?"

She stopped breathing, gripping the windowsill until splinters of wood bit into her fingers. He wasn't real.

"Mommy? Why won't you look at me?"

She grit her teeth against the uncertainty in that voice. She was going to turn around and no matter what she saw, she would keep walking out of this room.

"Mommy, look at me."

The door slammed shut behind her. Hayley jerked around to find Danny inches from her. His features were pinched with solemn anger, nostrils flaring as he stared up at her. "Why are you ignoring me, Mommy?" Hayley didn't answer, pressing herself against the window when the pictures on the walls began to shake.