C H A P T E R  T H R E E

☆☆☆

I looked forward to the day where I wouldn't have to be stuck in a claustrophobic corridor, where little grade eights were constantly bumping and stepping on my toes.

Manda and I squeezed through the congested corridors of our school until we made it into the equally-congested locker area. Morning periods were finally over and it was break time.

We were only a door apart and as I hunted for my History text book in my disarrayed locker, Manda leaned against her locker and sighed like a lovesick puppy.

“What is it?” I asked.

“Darren,” Manda replied.

“Yeah, and?”

“He finally asked me to hang out with me!” she squealed.

I finally found my textbook and turned to look at her with a grin on my face, “I'm so happy for you.”

I meant it. Manda has had a crush on Darren since grade eight and after two years of having an incurable bout of gwababa, she finally had the guts to get his number and text him.

They'd been vibing with each other for a couple of months now and while I had thought that her crush would dwindle, it had had only gotten stronger.

Manda made another sound, something like a giggle and a squeal and a few other students turned to frown at her.

“When did he ask? Last night?”

“No, in Physics! We had a Chemistry practical today and he partnered up with me and while we were busy filling out the questions he asked me!”

“It took him long enough,” I said.

“I know, but now what's important is that he finally did it.”

We finished up at our lockers and walked to our spot – a particular corner at the end of the field, near the old grandstands.

We ate our lunch while we made small talk and watched some of the boys chase a ball around the field.

“There's something else you need to know,” Manda said as she wiped a dab of mayonnaise off of her mouth.

“Wha?” I asked through the food I was chewing.

“It's rude to talk with your mouth open,” she chastised.

I rolled my eyes at her because if there was anyone who had mastered the art of talking through a mouth-full of food it was Amanda Nqobile Ncube.

“Anyways, as I was still trying to say, Collin likes you.”

“Mentjies?” I asked.

Manda nodded and my mouth dropped.

“Since when does Collin Mentjies know about my existence?”

“He's seen you around with me. Collin wanted me to put in a good word for him...”

I looked at Manda like she had grown a second head.

“I don't like Collin.”

“You don't even know him,” Manda said.

“He has a gold tooth and he lives in Eesterust!”

“Darren lives in Eesterust too. Don't be a snob, Paiten. He's actually really kind, sweet and not that bad looking and you guys have the same music taste. I wouldn't have mentioned him to you if I didn't think that he would be a good potential for you.”

I groaned.

“Just at least be nice to him if he approaches you, please?”

“What's in it for you? Why do you care if I hang out with him.”

“Well see, he and Darren are best friends. They do everything together…”

“You are unbelievable,” I said with a scoff.

“You know I would do the same for you if the situation was reversed. Come on Paiten.” Manda's eyes had enlarged to the size of saucers and she pouted at me, in her best puppy dog face.

“You're lucky I love you.”

For the most part, me, Manda and the rest of the Ridgewood High student body population were fortunate. Our former model C school was fully functional: with up-to-date facilities, a variety of subjects to choose from as well as a healthy focus on sports.

Other public schools in this country did not have the liberty to boast that and even though I hated school, I was grateful that I attended a good one.

I didn't feel at all that grateful sometimes, especially when I was stuck in Mevrou van der Merwe's Afrikaans class. There was nothing I hated more in this world than Afrikaans language lessons.

Mevrou would spend the entire period reading through the Sonder Grense textbook, with her monotonous and nasal voice. It was unpleasant to listen to, its tone harsh to our ears.

For some reason, the woman had a personal vendetta against me. It wasn't because I hated Afrikaans. Everyone in school hated Afrikaans –  except maybe for the five percent population of white children who hadn't gone to the höerskools.

No one could blame any non-white or non-coloured child for hating Afrikaans, it was after all, the white man's language and to have to be subjected to its boring lessons just pass high school was daunting.

My family may have been Afrikaans, but I loathed the language with a passion too. I could speak and read it fluently but it was not something I was happy about.

I reckoned Mevrou couldn't hate me because I performed poorly since I had a seventy percent average in the dreaded subject. I suppose she took one look at me and decided that she would hate until she breathed her last.

Today, we were doing voegwoorde  lessons and for the past fifteen minutes, Manda had been tapping her pen against her desk while she tried to figure out the correct conjunction to go with the given sentences.

I could do the exercise in my sleep, but I'd touch this homework tomorrow morning before our first period class with her.

“Afrikaans? The devil. How the fuck am I supposed to know what word goes with this?” Manda mumbled to herself as she shook her head in frustration.

“Do you need help?” I asked and she nodded and pointed her finger to the second sentence.

“The voegwoord is dus it's a second group voegwoord so-”

“Thanks Paiten, I got it from here.” Manda smiled and filled the word out. “One day, I want to put a sheet of paper with a bunch of Xhosa sentences on there for Mevrou to verbind die voegwoord for and see how she feels.”

“Amanda, hoekom praat jy in my klas? En in Engles ook?” Mevrou asked from her seat at her desk.

Amanda made a faux-apologetic look, “Jammer, Juffrou.”

MaNcube came to pick Manda up at 16:00 from my house after school and I was once again, left to my own devices.

As I did my chores, my mind kept on wandering back to the talk my dad wanted to have with me. Although he said that it wasn't anything bad, I was still a bit apprehensive, especially since he had looked so serious this morning.

By the time my dad came back from work, I was already curled up on the couch, watching my favourite sitcom. I had a bowl of popcorn beside me and I'd dip my hand into the bowl from time to time to shove a few kernels into my mouth without taking my attention off of the TV. He walked into the living room,

“Hey Princess.”

I turned my head away from the TV and smiled at him.

“Hey dad.”

“How was school?”

“Ugh,” I replied, which was my usual answer and my dad just chuckled. He only asked this question to get a rise out of me because he knew I hated being asked that. What did parents expect us to say? That school was amazing?

“That's like me asking you how work was,” I replied and my dad groaned with far more emphasis than was necessary.

“Work is like, sucking the life out of me and my teenage daughter like, just doesn't understand. She's ruining my life.”

“Oh my god Dad, stop teasing me,” I said with a frown, though I couldn't keep it on my face for long when my dad gave me an equally ridiculous pout.

“I'm going to go upstairs and change then make dinner, what do you want?”

“Anything.”

“Well, Paiten, I can't just go and buy 'anything' at a store. Be specific.”

“Actually, you can.” I replied and he groaned and retreated upstairs.

An hour later, I was halfway through the rice and hearty mince, cuddled up to my dad while we watched Suits. We watched the entire episode in silence. The show came to an end and while this was usually the time I'd retreat back into my room to do homework, I stayed still.

A part of me wished that I could run off to my room before he could say a thing. I had been dreading this conversation all day and I knew it was seconds away. His face had gotten this solemn look on it and his body had stiffened, a sure sign that whatever he needed to say would be serious.

“Paiten, remember I said we needed to talk this morning?”

“Yes,” I replied and sat upright to look into his eyes.

He sighed then he took my hand in his, his palms warm against mine.

“I hope that you know that I love you very much. You're my entire world.”

I nodded.

“It's been just the two of us for a long time and I'm the happiest Dad in the world. You make me very proud.”

His blue eyes shone with a fondness that always made me feel validated and loved.

“I've never looked at another woman since your mother left. I couldn't, it was too painful. I was content with living the rest of my life alone but recently I found someone… and I like her a lot. She makes me happy.”

My heart dropped to my stomach.

No, no, no, no!

“Her name is Anna, Anna Carson and we've been dating for a couple of months now. I wanted to make sure that we had something serious before involving you into the mix.”

For a while, all I could do was just gape at my dad with my lips parted.

“I know it must seem sudden, but I can see myself settling down with her. I want to build a home with someone that can help me out with everything. I also know that there are just some things you'd need a woman for and I can't help much in that department. I know it's a lot to take in right now and I'll give you time to process it. I want you to meet her soon, though, she's been dying to get to know you.”

× × ×

Pait👑💖 : Manda !

Pait👑💖: Manda! Get online now!!!!

Manda🖤: what is it?

Pait👑💖: MY DAD TOLD ME HE GOT A GIRLFRIEND DKDHSIADJFE

Manda🖤: oh my god. shit. OH MY GOD. are you okay?

Pait👑💖: I'M SHOOK.

Pait👑💖: HE WANTS ME TO MEET HER SOON. THEY'VE BEEN DATING FOR MONTHS WTF

Manda🖤: jguerhipegsgfbhgibgerb shit

Manda🖤: omG

Pait👑💖: I KNOW.

Manda🖤: on a scale of 1-10 how mad are you?

Pait👑💖: IDK EVEN MANDA I'M JUST LIKE SHOOK. I CAN'T EVEN breaThe LIKE WHAT IS LIFE. IT'S BEEN THE TWO OF US SINCE FOREVER NOW SOME HOE IS GONNA GET BETWEEN THAT AND IDK HOW TO FEEL ABOUT THAT WHAT IF SHE HATES ME OR WHAT IF SHE'S LIKE SUPER EVIL AND MY LIFE TURNS INTO CINDERELLA 😭

Manda🖤: woah girl okay that was dramz but I don't think your dad would get together with an evil person.

Pait👑💖: HAVE YOU NOT READ DISNEY CLASSICS? THE DADS NEVER KNOW. PUSSY MAKES A MAN BLIND!!

Manda🖤: you're really upset, huh. you never type in caps unless you're ready to pop off

Pait👑💖: idk even I feel like cryin :(

Manda🖤: well at least you can meet her soon then you can scope her out.

Pait👑💖: like i'm so – 🤷🏾‍♀️ uGh

Manda🖤: get some rest baby girl, you'll feel better in the morning.

Pait👑💖: yeah..

Manda🖤: i'll give you a nice squeezy hug tomorrow until you feel all better boo boo

Pait👑💖: love you

Manda🖤: love u most.

There was no handbook on how to mentally prepare yourself for moments like these.

Manda and I had found a loophole and it entailed spending an entire afternoon perfecting my make up and clothing. My dad and I would be eating out and his girlfriend would meet us there.

I'd tried to not think much about it in the past week, but now the moment had arrived and I could no longer avoid it.

The prospect of meeting Dad's new girlfriend made my stomach queasy and my anxiety levels spike. I didn't want to meet her, I didn't want her to disrupt the harmony between my dad and I. God forbid she hated me, then my life would well and truly be over.

“Paiten, I need you to close your eyes,” Manda said.

I closed them as instructed and Manda began to blend eye shadow on my eyes. This was the third look we had gone for in the past few hours. The first make up look had been too dramatic and the second one had been too light.

I didn't like make up, but when I'd called Manda in hysterics this morning, she came over with her kit and offered to do my make up for me as a form of therapy.

I didn't agree with the theory and I could live a stress-free life, one that didn't entail Manda stabbing my eye with that awful mascara wand, or pounding my face with all that foundation.

The final product was worth it. The make up, paired with a wine-red crop top,  black skinny jeans and an Adidas sneakers ensamble along with my curly hair handing down my back in waves – I looked amazing.

My dad thought the same thing when he came home to pick me up an hour later, dressed in jeans and a button-up. He gave me a once over a whistled a soft “wow.”

“You look handsome too,” I said to him with a smile. Manda had left five minutes ago and I wished she could've gone to the dinner with me. But this was a family affair, so I'd have to suck it up and hope for the best.

The drive to Menlyn was quiet, the radio served as background noise while I scrolled through my Instagram feed. My dad had reserved a table for three at Cappuccino’s.  Ten minutes passed in silence and I began to grow restless.

“Dad, I'm going to the bathroom,” I said and stood from my seat.

In the bathroom, I washed my hands and stared at my reflection for a while. I replied to Manda's text and then finally gathered the courage to walk back to the table. A woman with blonde hair was already seated next to my father and when my eyes zeroed in on her, I forgot how to breathe.

She was absolutely gorgeous: long dark blonde hair that rested in soft waves down to her back, a sharp facial structure with a strong jawline and high cheek bones, a perfectly slanted nose, cupids-bow shaped lips and gorgeous brown eyes.

I took my seat and the woman smiled at me.

“Paiten, this is Anna, Anna this is my daughter Paiten,” Dad said. His voice sounded muffled to me, like I was underwater and I had a difficult time deciphering the sounds.

“Hi, Paiten. I'm so glad to finally meet you.”

Her voice was peppy but had a pleasant sing-song quality to it, like she was singing even when she wasn't. She extended a hand out to me and I took it, warm slender fingers meshing with mine.

She was dressed in a soft pink sweater, paired with a simple heart pendant.

“Nice to meet you too,” I managed to choke out.

For the rest of the night, I couldn't keep my eyes off of her.

A U T H O R  N O T E

Glossary

gwababa - colloquial term used to explain the fear of approaching someone you're attracted to.

Mevrou- [Afrikaans] Ma'am/Mrs/Madam

höerskool - [Afrikaans] high school that uses Afrikaans as its only medium of instruction

voegwoord - [Afrikaans] conjunction

verbind die voegword - [Afrikaans] combine the conjuction

hoekom praat jy in my klas? En in Engels ook? [Afrikaans] why are you speaking in my class? and in English also?

Jammer [Afrikaans] - sorry.

Juffrou [Afrikaans] - female teacher