Mom: [describing her torture methods on her fiancé to Dad]

Brother: I feel so sorry for you (for being married to her before).

Dad: You feel sorry for me? If you saw me several years ago, you'd be really sorry for me. I was chained, trapped... Now I'm lucky (because I'm married to someone else)! 😉

Mom: 😒 [picks up a couch pillow and throws it at Dad]

Dad: 😂