"Tum Sirf deer se ghar waapas aane ki wajah se itna drama kyu kar rahe ho?"

(why are you creating a blunder just because I arrive late?)

I couldn't help but shouted and first time ever I felt scared of his bloodshot eyes. He was glaring me!

"Tu Meri geer mojudgi wich hi apni saheli to milne jaundi hai... Ta meri geer moojudgi wich hi tere dost is ghr wich aunde ne... kyu? Tu kya Chhupa rahi hai? Meri peeth peeche chal ki riha hai?"

(You go to meet your friend only in my absence as so your friends visits here! What are you hiding from me? What, are you doing on my back?)

He shouted in me and I felt scared but angry too.

"Kuch nahi chal raha tumhari peeth peeche... Tum Itna galat mere baare me soch bhi kese sakte ho?"

( I'm not doing anything wrong in your absence. How can you even think that low about me?)

I shouted on him because then I was almost done with his doubts!

"Tu ta kudiyon de school wich parhi si ta uh munde nu kab or kiwe mili?"

(You were studying in girls school then how do you know that guy and from how long you know him?)

He asked and I smiled bitterly while wiping my tears.

"Tum jesa Jahil insan mene aaj tak nhi dekha..."

( I haven't come across as uncivilized as you)

I yelled while crying and turned to go in the bedroom but his voice stopped me.

"Haan.. Aur us anpad or Jahilpan se tu fayda utha rahi hai... Bharosa tood dit'ta tune mera.."

(Yeah... You're getting advantage of my illiteracy. You've broke my trust! )

He said and this time his tone wasn't rude but hurt, I was confused on his sudden change.

"Aisa kya kar diya mene? Tum khud hi mujh par bharosa nhi kar rahe, warna mene to Aisa kuch nhi kara jis se tumhara bharosa tut jaye!"

(What I've done? You yourself are not trusting me, otherwise I did not do anything like that which could break your trust!)

I was feeling frustrated, angry disappointed, hurt and what not!

"Achha? Sach me tune mera bharosa nhi toda? To Eh kis cheez di dawa hai?"

(Oh really?  Haven't you break my trust?  so What is the use if this medicine?)

He asked me after showing the almost empty strip is a medicine and I was shocked as that was the contraceptive pills I use to took regularly

"Bol de taqat di dawa hai... Main ta Jahil hu.. Tere ut'te andha bharosa karda hu, Yaqeen kar lawanga!"

(Now say, this is supplement! I'm illiterate... I trust you blindly so make me fool)

"Bol kis cheez di dawa hai eh?"

(Say what's the use of this medicine?)

He shouted so loudly that I almost jumped on my place. But I stay silent, his behaviour was saying that he already know about the use of that medicine so there wasn't any space for my clarification or explanation.

"Aur eh ki hai?"

(And what's this?)

He asked after showing the empty strip of abortion pills which I took few days to back! I didn't have any words to say anything!

"Saman bandh... Kal savere hi pind lootna hai"

(Pack your stuff, we have to go back to village tomorrow morning)

He me ordered strictly, but I slowly shook my head, I couldn't left my studies so easily. My second semester was near its end, how could I leave that in between?

"Kya ho gya hai tumhe? Tum to mujhe aage parhana chahte the.. Ab kya hua?"

(What is wrong with you?  You wanted me to study further .. Now what happened?)

I asked in my helpless situation and he glare me.

"Maine ten'nu parhai karan waaste bhejiya si... Tu ne ki kit'ta Shama? Pachhtawa ho riha hai!"

(I'd sended you to study but what, you are doing? I'm regretting for my decision)

He shouted on me but muttered the last part and I cried as I was feeling scared of him

"Saman bandh"

(pack your clothes)

He shouted and I shook my head again, I didn't want to go back to village at any cost

"Main nhi jaungi"
(I don't go)

"Shahir wich zyada dil lag gya ki?"
(you stated liking city very much!)

He asked me, but I stay silent

"Ya phir shahir de munde de naal zyada dil lag giya!"
(or its better to say that you started liking the guy of city)

He added in slow voice and my heart skipped two beats.

"Pagal ho gaye ho kya?"

(Are you out of your mind?)

I almost yelled on him.

"Pagal nahi hua hu... Ab hosh wich aaya hu, Uh kis da chachha si jisnu tune maar dit'ta? Usi munde da ya kisi aur da?"

(I am not crazy... now I have come to my senses.. Who was the father of that child whom you had aborted? That guy or someone else)

I felt my soul was snatched away from my frame, my whole body was numb, that wasn't a small accuse on me from the person who was my husband.

"Tumhara bacha tha wo..."

(it was your child)

Pointing out towards him I said while gritting my teeth but he shook his head.

"Agar uh mera jayiz bachha hunda tu us nu mardi nahi?"

(If it would be my legitimate child then you wouldn't abort that?)

Tears rolled down from my eyes and my anger crossed all the limits. Lifting my land in air I slapped his cheek as hard as I could. He was shocked, his hand was covering his cheek and his eyes were becoming red with every passing second, I never wanted to slap him but...

That was must neened at that time!

He should know how to treat a lady, specially when it comes to her respect and dignity!

For two minutes he keep watching me without blinking and then he come back to his senses before pulling me towards himself by my arm abruptly! I was pushing him away but his grip was very firm around my arm.

"Chhodo mujhe"

(Leave me)

I yelled and pushed him away.

" Tum ek Jahil gawar ho.. Aur hamesha ek Jahil gawar hi rahoge.. Tumhe pta hai tumhari asli pareshani kya hai? Tumhe Zamil se jalan hoti hai kyuki wo ek Well educated or well mannered person hai or tum uske aage kuch nhi ho..."

(You are an uncivilised villager and you'll stay same for the rest of life... Do You know what your real problem is? You're jealous of Zamil because you're nothing in front of him.)

I Snap the reality on his face and turned towards bedroom but he held my arm firmly.

"kit'the ja ri hai?

(Where are you going?)

He pulled me with and I replied in the same language

" Dur raho mujhse! Aaj Sare haq kho diye tumne "

(Stay away from me, you have lost every rights on me!)

I shouted ang pushed him away from myself.

" Ab main tumhare sath or nhi rah sakungi..."

( now I can't live with you anymore)

I Asserted while glaring him

"Aisa Kya khaas hai us munde wich je tu sad'di shadi de chaar saal nu bhul gayi?''

(what's special is in that guy which lead you to forget four years of our marriage?)

"Usme kuch khaas nhi hai magar Wo kam se kam tumhari tarah jaahil gawar nhi hai... Well educated hai or narrow minded bilkul bhi nhi hai, Jo kisi ke kirdaar par keechad uthhalne se pehle ek baar bhi na sooche.."

( There isn't anything special in him but at least he is not an uncivilized and an illiterate person like you! He is very educated and he is not narrow minded like you who doesn't think twice before doing anyone's character assignation.)

Saying that I took a step towards the door but stopped by his voice..

"Ab to mujh me sari kamiyan dikhengi hi na.. Uh munda jo teri zindagi wich aa gya hai... Warna tu ta mere aage kadi kuch nhi boldi si"

(Now you won't like me because that guy has entered in your life otherwise you never felt any problem with me)

He said with venom in his voice.

"Main is ilzaam ki safai nhi dungi, apne kirdaar ko theek sabit karne ke liye main tumhare Saamne apni request nhi kar sakti! Main jaa rahi hu ab tumhare sath nhi reh sakti, mujhe tumse nafrat ho rahi hai!"

(I will not explain this accusation, I cannot request you to prove myself as not a characterless. I can't live with you anymore, I'm going. I loth you.)

I snap and turned towards the door.

"Tu meri biwi hai, aise ten'nu kisi aur munde de kol nahi Jane dunga"

(You're my wife... I won't let you go to any other guy)

"Talaq de do mujhe.... Main ese insan ke sath nahi reh sakti jo mujh par puri zindagi shak karta rahe"

(Divorce me, but I can't live with a man who would doubt on me for rest of my life.)

I argued and he glare me, with full of anger.

"Main ten'nu talaq nhi dunga..."

(I won't divorce you)

He said in anger and I smirked while wiping my tears.

"Dekhte hai!"

(Let's see...)

I challenged him before opening the main door of home.

"Shama Tu sirf meri hai... Tere ut'te sirf mera haq hai"

(You're only mine... Only I have right over you)

He said while pulling me back inside the home and close the door but I jerked his hand from my arm.

"MERE UPAR PEHLA HAQ MERA KHUD KA HAI... MAIN INSAAN HU, KOI BEJAAN CHEEZ NAHI KI KOI BHI MERE UPAR MERI MARZI KE BINA HAQ JATAYE!"

(THE FIRST RIGHT ON ME IS MY OWN... I'M A HUMAN BEING, NOT A LIFELESS THING THAT ANYONE COULD CLAIM ME WITHOUT MY CONSENTS!)

Snapping on his face I made my way out from the home while wiping my tears.

That was the first and biggest decision of my life which I'd took for myself. I didn't know where would I go, how will I bear my expenses and how will I manage everything. At that, spot I realised only one thing that if I would pleade in front of Abbas while giving my justifications then I would prove myself weak in front of him.

And what's the point of living with a man who can't believe on me and my statement?

Loyalty and trust are the most important asset of married life, but what's the benefit of having a relationship in which my husband wasn't trusting me!

While going out from the door I glanwd at him for last time, and I found a tear rolling down from his each eye. But I did not stop but took a cab to reach Richa's home.

==================

Assalamualaikum

Only one part is left

Do you like this story or its an example of useless mess?

Do let me know honestly!

_Naaz Jamal