The weather was bright outside but the wind was colder and refreshing. The rustling of the nature was like music to the ears as they sway with the air. The sound of birds nearby serves as a tune while the smell of the flowers permitted the air like a cologne.

I slowly pulled away from the kiss. My eyes were locked unto his, never wavering even once. Alexander let out a lopsided smile which made me raise both of my eyebrows.

"Oh my, are you trying to flirt with me Mr. Malcolm? My wife won't like it and considering how strong he is, he could skin you alive if he were to see you right now." Alexander stated.

'Wait...'

". . ."

'I--I k--kissed h--him?!' What just happened?! Help! I'm lost!' I felt my face burn like I was being roasted alive.

Realizing what I have done, I quickly pulled away from atop him and covered my face from him. It was so embarrassing that I just wanted to crawl into a dark hole and die.

"I--I didn't mean to do that! I--I was-- I didn't know what I was doing. You just look so handsome I--I can't help-- No! No! Not that I was checking you out, No! I was definitely not checking you out! it--it just felt like I--I just had to do i--it!" I stuttered.

Alexander laughed at my antics which made me turn red even more. Alexander stood up from the ground and dusted his shoulders and pants.

"How I wish my wife was like this. He never took the initiative to kiss me first so I was shock when you did that." Alexander stated which made me imagined an angry woman chasing after me with a rolling pin, trying to hit me for good.

"But he was so cute when he's so innocent and naivé." Alexander murmured to himself as he scratched the back of his head with a smile.

"I'm sorry..." I stated. "I wasn't trying to seduce you or have an affair with you, I don't even know what happened back there. It was like I have no control over my body and it just went like that. I'm so sorry..."

I heard Alexander let out a loud sigh as he crossed his arms over his chest. "It's okay. My wife wouldn't mind you kissing me."

I looked at him blinking. "Really? She won't mind?"

Alexander nodded with a small smile. "Yup. He's good with it."

Alexander held out his hand in front of me to help me stood up. I shook my head with a smile to decline his offer and stood up on my own. I dusted my pants and looked at him.

"I'm so sorry..."

"Its fine..."

"What if your wife chases me with a rolling pin? You do know that I have to run away. I think I can't tolerate women and their crazy mind."

"Hm... you have a point. I can't tolerate women with their crazy mindset too. I guess maybe that's why me and my wife were stuck with each other."

I frowned. He can't tolerate women yet he married a woman? Is his mind on the right track? I shook my head from those thoughts.

"What... then your wife changed you from an 'I can't tolerate women' to 'I love women!'" I inquired and nudge him on his shoulders as we walked side by side back to the mansion.

Alexander laughed. "Nope."

I looked at him with a confused look.

"Huh? Then what?" Alexander gave out a genuine smile.

"The person who I had loved from the start was him. He was the first person who made me feel an ache deep inside my chest that I couldn't even scratch and the only way to remedy this pain was for me to make him mine. Even though I've spent myself with countless women, I only ended hating those women and I always find myself chasing after him. My mother wasn't even an exception from those women."

"Whenever I wanted to forget my feelings towards him, the more this feelings grow within me that I couldn't stop it whenever I saw him. If I couldn't have him, it felt like I was at lost. In order to not lose him from me, I tied the knot with him and married him in no time." He chuckled.

"Even though he may doubt me hundreds of times. Even though I've committed unforgivable sins that I do know he would never ever forgive me, I still want to try and make it up to him. I wanted to start again but I cannot change time." Alexander stated then turned to look at me. With unwavering eyes, he focused himself on me.

"I wanted him to know that after all these years, my love never faded. It still longed for his presence and love, my eyes longed to see his smiling face and my hands who missed his touch, and my ears who missed those words that he would shyly whisper to me."

"I'm just a fool who really loved him but what can I do? It's love, and it's bound to get us crazy. Even though we try hard to suppressed it, it'll end up exploding and we become wild for it." Alexander looked up with a smile whilst I stared at him with admiration.

"Th--that was a long speech. Your wife must be so lucky to have you because nowadays, men tends to get tired with their wives then left them for another. Never thought that men like you still exist." I praised but deep inside me, I was frowning.

Alexander gave out a chuckle. "Truth be told, I've never been in love with any women in my life because I was already madly, deeply and truly in love with one person. And that is my wife."

And for a second, I felt my heart skip a beat but was wondering what kind of beat was that? Was that love, relief, jealousy or pain?

I didn't know why I was having mixed emotions from hearing all those words from him. He must have treasured his wife that he was so in love even after what trials they have been to. I felt my heart clench tightly but I chose to ignore it and walked with him like nothing happened.

- - - -

I accompanied Alexander to the servants quarter where all of the servants lived. Each room has two servants living in it but he told me that only one of those quarters belonged to a single servant.

He led me to the last door in the hallway and unlocked it with the key he brought. He opened it and motioned me to enter first.

"You first." Alexander stated.

I entered the room and looked around. It was neat and tidy, and the only things that were present in the room was a single bed, a desk and a bookshelve and a single chair by the window. A closet also stood by the side on the wall and there was another door that could be the attached bathroom.

I could say that it was bigger and better than the other servants room. It has its own bathroom attached to it while the others have to share the one from the outside. You could say that the occupant was biased by his master.

"It's hard to say this but I think you could figure it out." Alexander stated.

I walked around the room and felt like I am familiar with this space. The smell and everything seemed familiar and nostalgic yet I had no memories on it. Everything was blurry.

I stopped just in front of the closet with a frown. I was contemplating whether I should open this or not but base on what I am seeing, I could guess that I worked as a servant to this household. With a determined look, I pulled open the closet and my eyes widen in surprise when I saw what was inside.

A complete set of butler's suit was hanged neatly in the cabinet together with some old clothes and shoes placed there too. The uniform was hanged with a plastic cover over it to avoid dust from clinging onto it. I pulled it out from the closet and stared at it.

"Do you remember anything?" Alexander asked from behind me.

I turned around, my eyes still glued to the fabric held out in front of me. "I don't know... but I could see that if I wear this, I will look cool."

"More like hot." Alexander added which made me snap my vision to him.

" . . . " I frowned.

"Excuse me, what?"

"Nothing. Just continue oggling that." Alexander stood up from sitting on the bed. "I think we'll be having some guest today. Go take a bath and dress up."

Alexander stated as he left the room while calling someone over his phone. I stared back at the clothes on my hand and smiled to myself.

So judging from what I have found out, I am a butler and my master would be Alexander. So that explains why I am here in the first place because since my early days, I have been here in the mansion ever since. And that also explains why Alexander wanted to bring me back here, but I didn't quite grasps why was I treated highly than the other servants?

With a shrugged, I went out from the room to prepare myself from the visitors but decided to bring the suit with me.

'It's time to relive the past to remember what happened in the past.'

- - - -

Hello, how have you been?

Can someone recommend me some juicy YAOI manga or webtoons? hehe

Thanks!