Part 10: Hold Your Breath
Manhattan, New York.
Two motnhs later, June 15th 1990.
June's point of view
The day my mother and Damon were going to say "I do" to each other came faster than expected. They both wanted to get married as soon as possible, and it took them two whole months to plan everything. Of course, even though I was in Paris during those two months, I did my best to help them with everything. My mom came to Paris a month ago to try the dress Karl made especially for her, and she was breathtaking in it. It was weird having her in Paris with me. It was the very first time in two years she got to discover my new life, and I was proud showing her what it looked like. Anyway, Karl did a really good job, and I was happy he did that for her. We had our differences after the Vogue's incident, but then I guess things were back to normal. I made it on the cover of Vogue, and I had a lot of great feedbacks. I came to a point where people in the US didn't know me as Michael Jackson's ex girlfriend anymore, but more as Chanel's muse. Rumors kept spreading though. Since Michael and I began to hang out together again, the media made a fuss about it. He was accused to cheat on his wife with me, and they even imagined that Michael and I were friends again because I wanted him to meet the son we had together that he never knew about. Crazy? Yeah, I know. Speaking about Michael, even though I was in Paris and him in California, we spent long nights on the phone, just talking to each other, and I loved it. He made me laugh, and I felt good just talking to him like this. We talked about everything. Even football, while Michael doesn't like it. I guess every topic was a good way for me to just hear his voice. We could have talked about boring reality shows, I wouldn't have even cared, as long as I could hear his calming voice and sweet giggles. He just made me fall in love with him more and more. I couldn't get enough of him. Everytime I had to go or he had to hang up the phone, I was already missing his voice, and I was looking forward to call him again. Even if I would, I couldn't get rid of him. It's like he's a part of me. I've never felt this complete in my life but since I have him back into it. He was the missing piece to my puzzle. However, I felt like he was acting all weird the last past month. It's like he was nervous when he talked to me, or even like he was hiding something from me, but I had no idea what it was. Evertyime I asked him what was wrong with him, he just told me he was a bit stressed out by work, but I didn't believe him. After a few tries, I just decided to let it go. I knew if he was in trouble or something, he would tell me. That's what friends are here for, right?
The reception venue my mother chose was this hotel in Manhattan, the Gramercy Park Hotel. The courtyard was amazingly decorated by the staff; When you came in the large room, the first thing you saw was this giant beautiful water fountain, and the sound of it was so refreshing and relaxing. The round tables were covered in sheer champagne fabrics, which gave a romantic feeling to the whole room. The centerpieces of the tables were copper candles. It was just a glass holder with a crisscross pattern of copper tape strips, but it was really beautiful as well. The atmosphere in there was zen, calm, and I liked it very much. I think it defined who my mother was perfectly. People were running across the room, adjusting every little details left appart. Since I came back a day before, I tried to help, but everytime I wanted to do something about the decoration, people told me they were handling this, that I didn't need to do anything. I took a quick look at the seating arrangements next to the fountain, and smiled at the names on it. Basically, the guests were my family and Damon's along with co-workers they have in common. Of course my mother didn't forget to invite David and Jeremy. They're like sons to her since they both work for me.
As I was in the living room, reading The Eye Of The World by Robert Jordan, I heard Timmy's little feet stomping towards me, chanting my name. When I turned around, he was holding a cowboy doll in his hands.
"Auntie June, look what daddy got me today," he said, proudly showing me his new toy.
"Wow, look at this," I said in awe, putting my book down. "It's so cool!"
"It is!" he happily squealed. "Would you like to play with it?"
"I'd love to," I smiled, and took the toy from his little hands. "Don't you have another one so you can play with me?" I wondered.
"No, this is the only one I got," he shrugged, and sat on my lap. "Do you think he needs a friend? So he doesn't feel too lonely?"
"Well, he already has you as his friend, but I guess he would need another one, indeed," I smiled. "I'll get you one as soon as the wedding's organisation is over," I whispered to him, and his eyes lit up with excitement.
"Really?" He asked in disbelief. "Oh, you're the best auntie in the world! I love you so much," he told me, giving me a tight hug.
"I love you too, buddy. More than anything," I sincerely said, holding him tight.
It's crazy how I missed him. It been a while I didn't see him, and I was glad Josh and him were staying over at my mother's house before the wedding. I was delighted to have them both together by my side. Family is the most important thing to me, and I cherrish every moment I spend with them. Since I moved away in Paris, it been really conmplicated for the family to be reunited at the same time, and this wedding would be the occasion to be all together once again.
As Tim was playing with his new toy, still on my lap, while I was reading my book, I heard my phone buzzing on the coffee table.
"Hello?" I asked, closing my book.
"Hey there, Ms Wellington," Michael greeted me. "What are you doing?"
"Michael," I instantly smiled. "I'm spending some time with my favorite little boy in the whole world," I said, reffering to Tim who looked at me with a shy smile on his face.
"Tim has arrived?" he asked me, visibly understanding who I was talking about.
"Yeah, Josh and him arrived a couple hours ago," I let him know, brushing Timmy's hair back. "What are you doing?" I asked back at him.
"Nothing, just waiting for you to come and open the front door for me," he laughed, and my eyes widened.
"W-What?" I asked in disbelief. "You're already here? I thought you would be here tomorrow, just in time for the wedding."
"Surprise," he said in a sing song voice. "So are you going to open that door or not?"
I put the phone between my ear and shoulder, "I'm coming," I said, and put Tim back down. He followed me to the front door, never letting go of his new toy, and when I opened it, my jaw practically dropped at the gorgeous sight before my eyes. "H-Hi," I said through the phone, while Michael was in front of me.
"You can hang up, you know," he teased, and I laughed at myself before hanging up. "Hi," he finally said, flashing me this shy but gorgeous smile of his.
"Michael!" Tim cheered, running towards him and hugging his legs. "It been so long I didn't see you for real!"
"Hey buddy," Michael smiled, kneeling in front of him. "You look so tall now! You're a teenager now, aren't you?"
"No, silly!" Tim laughed hard. "I'm only eight," he corrected him, giggling.
"You sure? Cause you're almost as tall as I am!" Michael smiled.
"You're so silly," Tim giggled again. "I missed you!"
"I missed you too," Michael sincerely said, giving him a hug.
Seeing Michael this way with my godson brought so much memories to my mind. Tim always loved Michael, just as Michael always loved Tim. Everytime they saw each other, they would lock themselves in the playroom and play whatever games together. I used to secretly watch them playing together and just melt at the sight. Michael is so wonderful with children.
"So," Michael said, clapping his hands together once he was back on his feet. "Are you going to let me in now?"
"Oh um, yeah! Sorry," I chuckled at myself and stepped aside so Michael could come in.
He enterred the house and looked at his surroundings. It was the first time he came in my mother's new house, considering she moved away with Damon a year ago.
"This place is beautiful," he sincerely said, smiling. "So this is your mother's and Damon's house, right?"
"Yeah," I nodded. "They moved together like a year ago or so," I explained, and he nodded. I looked down at Timmy who was looking up at Michael with sparkly eyes, and smiled a bit before squatting in front of him. "Hey Timmy, would you go and tell Michelle and daddy that Michael's here?"
"Sure!" he enthusistically said before running across the house.
"I swear he got so tall," Michael said with a smile. "He looks a lot like Josh now."
"Yes, he does," I said, looking at Tim running before looking back at Michael. "So, why are you already here?"
"I'm just being a good friendly date," he shrugged with a shy smile. "I thought you'd be more reassured if I was here early. I didn't want you to think that I wouldn't come, after all."
"I knew you would, though," I smiled. "Thank you for accepting to be my date for this. I really didn't want to be alone for this," I chuckled nervously.
"Of course I'd accept," he smiled again.
"How Jessica is feeling about this?" I asked him. "I don't want her to think that I asked you this so I can have you back or anything, I really needed a friend to –"
"Hey, stop freaking out. I'm here, so it's not a problem. She said I could go," he forced a smile. "So, are you nervous?" he asked, changing quickly of topic.
"I'm not the one who's getting married," I chuckled.
"Your turn will come," he smiled down at me, and I stared at him intensely.
Our eyes were locked in a deep and sparkly stare, and I couldn't get my eyes of off his. It's like his big brown doe eyes were hypnotizing me. He always had his effect on me, and I guess he always will.
"Michael!" we heard my mother cheering from across the room, walking towards us, which caused us to finally break eye-contact. "It's so good to see you again," she said, giving him a hug. "How are you doing?"
"I'm great, Michelle. And yousrself? Are you nervous?" he smiled, breaking the hug.
"I'm nervous as hell," she chuckled nervously, "but it's not like I never done that before," my mother smiled at Michael. "Were you nervous on your wedding day?"
Swtich topic, switch topic, switch topic.
"Look who's here!" Jer cheered, walking into the room. "Nice to see you again, Michael," he smiled, giving him a hug as well.
Thank you, Jer.
"Nice to see you too," Michael smiled at him. "Where's David?"
"In the shower. You can go and say hi to him if you want to, I'm sure he'd be thrilled," he said, and we all laughed.
This is what makes me the most happy woman on this planet: being surrounded by my people.
***
Manhattan, New York.
The next day, June 16th 1990.
"Oh my God, mom. You're so beautiful," I said to my mom who was in her wedding dress in front of the full-length mirror.
"You really think so? Isn't it too much?" she asked, nervous, turning around to face me.
"Of course not! The dress is amazing, and I think this is the first time I see your hair in a bun," I smiled and took her hands in mine. "You're the prettiest bride I've ever seen in my entire life," I sincerely told her.
"Just wait until you get married, baby girl. You'll be the prettiest bride ever," she smiled back at me.
"Hey JuJu, get your ass here so I can do your hair," Dave called from the bathroom, and I let go of my mom's hands. "What do you want me to do with this hair of yours, darling?" Dave asked me as I took a seat in front of the mirror.
"I want it curly," I said with a smirk. I knew Michael would love it. "Definitely."
Nothing's wrong with a little innocent flirt, right? Plus, my dress turned out to be red, aka Michael's favorite color. My mom wanted her bridesmaid to wear red because she said it was the color of passion and love, so I have nothing to do with that. I'm glad she chose this color, though. I love my dress. It's a floor-length tight strapless mermaid dress, with tiny pleats crossed horizontally at the back of it.
"I could do a high curly bun with a little strand of curly hair resting on your forehead, what do you think?" he asked me, playing with my hair. "The result will be much better than my explanation," he giggled.
"Dude, I trust you. You'be been my hairstylist for alsmost two years now, and I've always loved what you did with my hair and make up," I smiled at him, and he shyly smiled back a me. "Now go ahead and work your magic, Mr. Rogers," I commanded, and it took a second for Dave to do as he was told.
After half an hour of work on my hair, Dave began to work on my make up. I told him I wanted something light, as always. I don't like make-up that much, and being a model didn't make me change my mind about it. The only times I put heavy make up on are druing my photoshoot, and I'm forced to it. However, when I need to go somwhere when I'm not working, whether I put real light make up on or no make up at all.
"We've got a problem," my mom told me at the doorframe of the suite's bathroom. "Damon's best man, Jim, just called him and he can't come. His mother is at the hospital," she explained to me, panicked.
"Oh man, is she okay? His mother?" I asked, turning towards my trembling mother.
"I don't know, he's on his way to see her," she told me, playing with her fingers nervously. "David, would you be Damon's best man? Please?"
"Oh, Michelle, no. Please. I don't think I'll be able to stand in front of all this crowd, I'm too shy for this."
I gave him a look, "You? Shy?" I snorted.
"I am really shy when it comes to me being the center of attention," he explained to me. "Can't someone else do it?"
"Damon asked Jeremy, but he refused for the same reason," my mom panicked. "What are we gonna do? He can't do this without best man!"
"You want me to ask Michael? I mean, he's shy as well, but he's used to be in front of a lot of people. I could ask him, if you want to," I told my mother, and her eyes lit up.
"Yes, please, sweetheart," she told me, and I stood up from my chair to reach my phone.
I pressed Michael's number, and put my cell to my ear. He asnwered after the thrid tone.
"Hello?" he asked in this sweet voice of his.
"Hey Mike, it's me, June," I told him, and my own eyes widened at the nickname I gave him. It was the first time ever I called him Mike, but since it was his friends' nickname for him, I guess it was logical for me to call him that.
"I like the sound of this nickname coming from your mouth," he said, and I could tell he was sincere. His voice was calm and soft, as always. Just hearing his voice put me at ease. "What's up?"
"Oh, I just called because we've got a problem," I declared. "Damon's best man can't come because his mother is at the hospital right now, so he had to cancel and –"
"Oh my God, is she okay? What happened?" he cut me off, and I smiled at his concern.
Even though he didn't know the guy, he was concerned by what could happen to him or his family. That's all him: the carring and kind guy I fell in love with the very first time my stare crossed his.
"We don't know yet, he was on his way to the hospital when he called my mom," I explained. "Look, we need a favor."
"What is it?"
"We need you to replace Jim as Damon's best man," I softly told him. "It's okay if you don't want to, I know you're shy and stuff and –"
"I'll do it," he said, cutting me off. "Just because I'll be lucky enough to walk down the aisle with you on my arm," he giggled.
"You will? Oh God, thank you! You're a life saver!" I exclaimed in relief, not acknoledging his last sentence which, by the way, made me melt inside.
"He's gonna do it?" my mom mouthed me with hopeful eyes, and I nodded. She let out a huge sigh of relief, and called Damon back, leaving the bathroom.
"Glad I can help," he soflty said, and I could feel his smile through his words. "Where is Damon at the moment?"
"He's on the same floor as you, room number eighteen," I informed him. "Seriously though, you're sure it doesn't bother you?"
"I told you it doesn't," he reassured, chuckling. "I got to go and see Damon now," he said.
"Okay, I'll see you in a few then. I'll be the girl in red," I told him with a smirk.
"Wait, you said red?" Michael asked me, and I giggled.
"See you later, best man," I said, giggling some more before hanging up the phone.
"Why did he marry that bitch of Jessica again?" Dave asked, frowning.
"Hush, and go back to work," I chuckled, and closed my eyes again so that David could finish his magic.
***
Michael's point of view
As I was waiting in the hall of the church with a nercous Damon by my side, I could hear the roaring of the crowd inside. It was a little church, and there was not a lot of people invited here, as it was a private ceremony. Michelle and Damon made it private to avoid any commotion because of me and June's presence, and I was glad about this. I would feel so guilty if I caused any commotion on that special day. I was really honoured to be able to witness June's mother's wedding. I always loved her: she's always been kind towards me, even when June and I had difficult times. I didn't know Damon that much, on the other hand. The last time I saw him was on Christmas of '87, aka my first Christmas. June had a weird feeling about him, back then, but look where they both are now. She seems to love him very much, just as he looks to care about her a lot. After what happened between the two of them, I was happy to see everything was good now. They looked like a true family, even though June didn't like to think that.
"You look nervous," Damon said next to me, which snapped me out of my thoughts.
"Oh no, I'm not. Are you?" I asked him back.
"I'm nervous as hell," he chuckled. "This is my first marriage."
"I think it doesn't matter if you've been married or not in the past. I think every marriage is like the first time because you're starting all over again with another person you'll love until the day you die," I explained with a smile.
"This is what happened to Antoine," he nodded. "He loved Michelle until the day he died."
"Exactly," I nodded too.
"Did you have the chance to meet him?" he asked, reffering to June's dad.
"Yes," I smiled. "He is kind of the one who got June and me together," I explained with a giggle. "When he was on his death bed, he conviced June to tell me about her feelings for me. Luckily, those feelings were mutual."
"Are those feelings still mutual?" he asked me with a smile.
"Mutual?" I asked, frowning. "I'm married, and June and I are friends now. She's moved on," I explained, and waited for Damon to say something. "Right?"
"Oh um, yeah! Right," he smiled. "I'm just talking non-sense because of my nervousness," he chuckled nervously. "What time is it?" he asked me, while he had his own watch on his wrist.
I frowned some more, and looked down at my wrist, "5:50PM," I said. "June should be here in a minute," I smiled, and at the second I said this, I heard heels clicking behind me.
When I turned around, June was walking towards me, a bouquet of white flowers in her right hand, while the other one was holding her long red dress so it doesn't fall on the floor. Of course, she was breathtaking. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. Her dress was hugging her body perfectly, and her bun allowed a wonderful view on her neck. As closer she walked to me, as faster my heart beated. Each step she took made me realize how amazingly beautiful she was. When I finally got to meet her wonderful blue eyes, I couldn't make a sound, I couldn't make a move. I was speechless.
"Hey," she shyly said, blushing a bit. "You look handsome."
"I um, I-I, you, I..." I stammered, and mentally slapped myself for this.
"I think the gentleman wants to tell you how breathtaking you look," Damon chimed in, giving June a hug, "and you really are," he smiled after breaking the hug.
"Thanks Day. You look handsome yourself," she smiled at him.
"Is your mother okay?"
"She's a nervous wreck, but she's okay," she laughed, and I melted inside. "How are you?"
"I'm nervous, but excited," he admitted with a smile. "It's almost time, I should probably get my place."
"You should," June verified, nodding. "We know what we have to do."
"Good," he said, and placed a kiss on her cheek. "Don't steal the show from your mom with your beauty," he winked at me.
"She's even more beautiful than I am," June assured him, and he left the hall of the church.
We were both left alone once Damon left the room, and the silence between the both of us was kinda akward. After my stammering, June must have though I had a problem or something. I really felt like an idiot. My shyness is such a burden at times, I just wish it could go away for a while.
"Nervous?" she asked me, smiling. It was even hard for me to look at her in the eyes. I was kinda intimidated by her beauty.
"Yeah," I simply answered. "Are you?"
"As fuck," she said, and I nudged her. "Sorry, sorry. Not in the right place," she said, referring to the sacred place the church was. "I meant, I'm really nervous."
"Don't be. People in here are family to you, you shouldn't be nervous," I smiled at her, my shyness disappering. "You really look gorgeous," I admitted, blushing a bit.
"Thanks," she smiled. "Karl made this dress for me," she explained. "Well, he did mine and my mother's, actually."
"He's a genius," I declared with a smile.
"Hey guys, is Damon gone?" Michelle asked from... I don't know where, actually.
"Yeah, you both can come out," June laughed.
Michelle and her brother-in-law, Darren, the one who was going to lead her to the altar since she lost her father a long time ago, came out to where they were hiding, to come and join the both of us. June didn't lie: Michelle was really beautiful in her wedding dress. It was a tight white satin dress with a glowing combination of luminosity bead, pearl and crystal in it.
"Look at you both," she said, gesturing towards us with her free hand while the other one was holding her bouquet of flowers. "You look perfect," she whispered, because of the tears that were about to escape her eyes.
"Mom, don't cry yet," June chuckled and gave her mom a hug. "You don't want to ruin Dave's work now, do you?"
"No," Michelle slightly laughed, and wiped under her eyes with her index finger.
We heard soft music playing outside, which was June and I's cue to go out of the hall to the church.
"We'll see you down the aisle," June told her mom before taking my arm.
"Ready?" I asked, looking down at her.
"As I'll ever be," she smiled, and the door opened.
Every eye was on us, and I felt slightly uncomfortable about this. As June knows me, she squeezed my arm a little for comfort, and I looked down at her, walking down the aisle. At the second I met her eyes, all my uneasiness was gone, and I was just focusing on how beautiful she was. While walking down the aisle, we could hear people whispering, people gasping, the clicks of cameras taking pictures of the both of us, but I couldn't care less. All I was focused on was June, and only June. Sadly, this moment was shoter than I expected. When we arrived at the altar, June went on the left side of it, where Michelle would be, and I joined Damon's side on the right side. He gave me a friendly tap on the shoulder, and I smiled at him.
***
Damon and Michelle were officialy Mr. and Mrs. Grey when we got to the reception venue in the same hotel I booked my room. The décor was amazingly beautiful. I was seated next to June, at the same table as Damon and Michelle.
"Excuse me," June exclaimed in the crowded room. "I would like to give a toast to the newly-weds," she smiled, and the room went quiet. She cleared her throat, and raised her glass of champagne. "I would like to say that those two people right here," she said, motionning to Damon and Michelle, "are wonderful together. They found each other, and I couldn't be more happy about this. I have to say that, at first, things were complicated for me to accept, because I didn't want anybody to take my father's place. I miss him everyday that God makes, and I know you miss him too, mom, but this is what he would have wanted: you to be happy. And Damon is the reason of your daily happiness. You found your light back, the same light you lost when dad passed away, and this is all that matters to me. I remember the first time I met you, Day. It was on Christmas, back in '87. Can I tell you that I didn't like you at all when I first met you?" she laughed, and so did the room. "Like serisouly. I wanted you to leave the house as soon as you got here. I even asked Michael to make you go away," she laughed again, and I laughed as well, remembering the moment. "But then, after a long, long time, I finally got to know you, and now I'm proud to call you a part of my family. I love you guys really much, and I wish you the best life together," she finished, and the room, including me, applaused.
***
It was time for the newly-weds to have their first dance together, and they decided to dance on "Isn't She Lovely" by my friend Stevie Wonder. That moment was full of emotion. All eyes were on them, and you could feel their love miles away. Once the song was over, I stood up from my chair and invited June to dance.
"May I have this dance?" I asked, offering her my right hand.
She smiled up at me, and gave me her hand, "You may."
We both went on the dance floor, and we began to sway back and forth together, in sync with the song which was now "Blaze of Glozy" by Bon Jovi. I put my left hand on the small of her back, while the other one was holding her hand. It felt good to have her close to me again, and I wouldn't let go of her. Her hand was on my shoulder, but I felt it slide at the back of my neck after a little while. Feeling her hands at this place sent shivers down my spine, cause this was the spot where she used to put her hands when she kissed me.
"Don't be nervous," she said to me with a smile. "It's just me."
"It's just you," I said, and stopped swaying. "Excuse me, I need a minute," I told her, before leaving the dance floor.
June's point of view
I looked at Michael leaving the dance floor in a rush skeptically. Did I say something wrong? Did I do something I shouldn't have? I was kinda taken aback by his action. I decided I would follow him wherever he was going. I went to the kitchen, but he wasn't there, so I assumed he was at the back, outside the building. When I opened the door, a cool breeze sent chills on my arms.
"Michael?" I called, but no one answered. "Michael, are you here?"
No asnwers.
I walked further outside the building, and then I found him, his back facing me. He had his hands on his hips, and was looking at the sky. I walked closer to him and noticed his eyes were closed.
"Michael, what's wrong?" I asked him, worried. "Did I say something wrong?"
"No, that's the problem," he quietly said, and looked down at me, putting his arms back at his side. "You didn't do anything wrong, and that's the problem."
"Why is this a problem?" I asked, frowning. "I don't understand."
"You're perfect," he sighed.
"I still don't see why it's a problem," I said, chuckling, trying to lighten up the mood. "Seriously Michael, come back inside and dance with me," I told him, taking his hands in mine.
"I want to stay here for a bit," he said, smiling a bit at me.
"You want me to stay here with you?"
"I don't want to ruin the party. Go and have fun. I'm fine," he smiled.
"I want to stay here though," I smiled back, and gave him a hug. "I'm here for you, Michael. Whenever you need me, I'll be there."
He pulled away from me, and looked at me deep in the eyes. My eyes couldn't left his. He brought his hand to my face, and rubbed my cheek with his thumb. His eyes seemed wattery, and I didn't know what was wrong with him. I put my hand over his, and caressed it gently. When I saw him leaning down towards me, I was frozen. I couldn't move. I didn't want to make a hasty move so he pulled back from me. I knew he was about to kiss me, and I wanted him to very badly, that's why I didn't move and waited for his lips to touch mine. But then, as he was too slow for me, I decided I would be the one to crash my lips onto his so he doesn't feel guilty about this, so I would be the only one to blame for kissing a married man. When our lips connected, Michael cupped my face in his giant hands, and I could feel my heart pounding in my chest at a point that I thought it would jump out of my chest. My head was spinning, my legs became weaker and weaker as the kiss began to longer. But as it became more heated, Michael abruptly pulled again from my numb lips.
"I'm sorry, I-I didn't mean to –" I began, but Michael cut me off.
"I-I can't. Jessica is pregnant," he blurted out with tears in his eyes, and I think I could have died right there.
His wife was pregnant... by him.
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