Part 83: I'll Be Fine

Bad Tour, Copenhagen, Denmark
February 15th 1988

Michael's point of view

"I love you, Copenhagen! Thank you!" I shouted and ran off stage to meet Carson and June backstage.

We were back on tour for more than a month, and it felt good to be on stage again. As always, June was a great help. She took care of me by making sure I lacked nothing, and she did her job of translator as well.

Carson handed me a towel and I washed my sweaty face with it, while accepting the congratulations from the crew. As I made my way to the dressing room with Carson by my side, I came in the room, and June was on the phone. She spent a lot of time glued to her phone through the weeks. Everytime I asked  her what was the call about, she seemed nervous and just dodged my question.
But this time was different. When I came in the room, she had an angry expression on her face. When she turned around and looked at me, her face fell.

"What is it?" I mouthed her.

"I, um, I gotta go, ok?" She said through the phone. "Twenty-four hours? That's all? Don't you think I need more time to take such a huge decision?" She asked, a bit frustrated. "Well, excuse me, but I'm kind of busy," she finally said and hung up her phone. She rubbed her forhead with her free hand, and let out a heavy sigh.

"What was that about?" I asked, and Carson visibly understood he wasn't needed here, so he left, closing the door of my dressing room behind him.

"N-nothing, actually," she said, not even looking at me.

"What do you mean, nothing? You look pretty upset for something which is actually nothing," I remarked, folding my arms on my chest.

"Don't do this," she warned me, sitting on the couch.

"Do what?" I asked with a slight attitude.

"This. Being mad for something you don't know."

"Listen, you've been glued to your cellphone for weeks, I have the right to know what's going on, right?"

"Nothing. Is. Going. On." She enunciated, and I could tell she was getting really irritated.

"Really? That's exactly what a cheater would say."

"What?" She shouted, standing up from the couch. "You're accusing me of cheating on you, Michael? Really?"

"I'm not accusing you of anything, June! Talk to me, you know you can tell me everything!"

"What do you want me to tell you, huh?"

"Who's been calling you for weeks?"

"Nobody. They'll stop calling, anyway."

"They?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. "Who are you talking about?"

"Forget it."

"No, I'm not going to forget it. You're hiding something from me, and you promised me you won't do it again. Was that another empty promise?"

"Another? Are you serious, Michael?"

"Stop it," I said, looking at the floor.
"Stop calling me Michael. It feels like a bad word coming out of your mouth."

"I can call you whatever I want! And by the way, am I questioning you about this woman you keep talking to through the phone? No, because I trust you!"

"It's not about trust right now! It's about you hiding something from me! And Jessica and I speak on the phone so I can know how's her son feeling!"

"Jessica, huh? You even call her by her name? Why do you care so much? Do you like her?"

"No! June, for God's sake! I want this little boy to be ok! He's my Beverly, and I don't want him to die just like--" I trailed off. I didn't want to say this. I didn't want to talk about her because I know it's still a sensitive subject. "I'm sorry."

"Just like her," she finished my sentence. "Thank you for reminding me."

"I didn't mean to say it, I'm sorry " I wanted to take her hand, but she dodged me.

"Karl Lagerfeld called," she blurted out. I was shocked, and I sat down on the couch in shock. "He was the one calling me for weeks. He or his assistant. Every time they called, I told them I wasn't interested in being a model, but they didn't give up."

"W-what? W-why? How?" I stuttered, still shocked.

"He saw my pics in the magazines, and he says I have a huge potential. He wants to meet me and talk business."

"And why did you refuse?" I asked, as her phone began ringing again. She looked down at it and rolled her eyes.

She laughed, but not a happy laugh, a sarcastic one, "Because I don't want you to think I used you to have a career, and I don't want to be known as a woman who used you to have what she wants."

"But..  it's Karl Lagerfeld, it's Chanel. You can't refuse, June. I know you're not using me for anything though."

"Watch me," she taunted, picking her ringing phone. "Hello?" She said, annoyed. Her eyes widened and she straightened up on her chair. "Mister Lagerfeld, hi."

I frowned, watching her speaking. She seemed sad having to say no to him. I mean, it's a great opportunity for her. I wished it have been another kind of opportunity, but knowing my girlfriend is so beautiful that Mr. Lagerfeld himself wanted her to be a part of his work was quite flattering. I know June is beautiful. She's breathtaking.

"Accept," I mouthed to June.

"No," she mouthed back. "I am really sorry, but as I keep telling you for weeks now, I don't want to be a part of it. It's really flattering, but I--"

"June. Take the freaking opportunity," I pressed. "At least, accept to meet the guy!"

"Hold on," she said to the director of the Chanel brand on the other end of the phone. She covered the phone with her hand, and looked at me. "I can't accept, and I won't. I don't care if it's Karl Lagerfeld or the freaking Queen. My life is good as it is now, I dont want anything to change," she explained.

"So what? Just accept to meet him! Your life won't change a bit if you just accept to meet him, right?"

"If I do accept to meet him, I'll have to come back to New York, and I don't want to. I don't want to leave you, even though you're being a pain in the ass," she said, looking at the floor.

"Go. Please," I begged. "You need something positive in your life, and maybe that's what this opportunity is."

"I'm not leaving you. I'm not changing our lives," she said back, shaking her head.

"Please. Do it for me," I said. Deep inside of me, I didn't want her to accept the job. I wanted to be selfish, and keep her with me. She was right, our lives were perfect just the way they were. "Just meet him, and see what he has to tell you."

She looked at me with a sad face on, and put the phone back to her ear. "Hello?" She asked. "When and where do you want us to meet?" She motionned me to take a pen and a piece of paper, and I did as told. "The Palace Hotel, in Manhattan. The day after tomorrow? Wow, um, okay. What time?" She asked and paused for his answer. My eyes widened a bit. I didn't know she'd leave so soon. "10AM. Okay. I'll see you then. Just know I'm not accepting anything. It's just a meeting," she remarked. "Okay then. Bye."

She hung up her phone, and rubbed her temples. "I did this for you. I really don't want to leave you, even though I kinda hate you right now."

"Look," I began, and sat next to her. I brushed my thumb on her cheek, and gave her a half smile, "I'm sorry for being an idiot at times. I know I shouldn't have accused you to cheat on me, or talk about Beverly this way. The thing is, I love you, and it's hard for me to think that I have to share you with someone else. I wanna be selfish with you. But I know I can't. That's why you have to go and talk to Karl Lagerfeld. Like I said earlier, this opportunity can be real good for you, babygirl. I think you need this."

"I need you, that's all I need," she said in a low voice, breaking eye contact with me.

"No, it's not true. Maybe I'm enough for now, but I won't be enough for long. You need something else than me, baby. It's saddens me to think about it, but it's true. You just have me. You moved away from your hometown for me, you travel the world for me. You did every kind of sacrifice for me, while I have it all: my career, you, my family... Now it's my turn to pay you back. Go ahead, and take your chance, honey."

"Will you be okay without me?" She asked, pouting.

"I'll be fine," I said, nodding. "But I'll be better when you come back," I smiled.

"I'll be fast, I promise," she said, resting her head on my shoulder.

"Good," I smiled, and placed a kiss on her forhead. "I don't want to ruin the mood, but we should probably return to the hotel now," I softly told her.

"Yeah, let's go," she said, and placed a kiss on my cheek.

"Hey, June," I called as she was about to leave my dressing room. She turned around, her hand rested on the door knob, and looked towards me. "I love you."

"I love you more," she said my famous line, and smiled before leaving the room.

June's point of view

As I was heading to the limo to wait for Michael, Sheryl ran after me, calling my name.

"Hey girl, what's up?" I gently asked her, trying to hide my previous emotions.

"Hey!" She smiled, catching her breath. "I was about to head off as well, Karen will be there in a few. Would you like to have a drink with the crew?"

"Aw, thank you for asking, but I'm gonna stay with Michael tonight," I smiled.

"What's going on? You look upset," she said, patting my shoulder.

"Nothing, don't you worry about me," I smiled again. "I just want to be with Michael."

"Maybe you both could come to my suite and have a drink then? Or maybe you just wanna stay with your man and have yet another night of mind blowing sex?" She asked, wiggling her eyebrows.

"You're impossible," I laughed. "I'll see if Michael is up to it, and I'll let you know. He looks tired, so I don't--"

"I'm not that tired," Michael said, coming from behind us. "What is it?"

"Do you guys want to come to my suite and have a drink? You know, to relax a bit."

"I'd love to!" He exclaimed happily. "I'll take a shower, and we'll be there in a few."

I was taken aback by his excitement. I mean, he did seem really happy about me leaving, and it kinda hurt me, to be honest. Maybe he was too happy, actually. I wanted him to be sad. As sad as I was to leave him.

"Okay! See you guys," Sheryl smiled.

***

After a hot shower and fresh clothes on our backs, Michael and I headed to Sheryl's suite hand in hand. Michael kept repeating me it was a good thing I accepted to meet Mr. Lagerfeld, and it kind of reassured me. It didn't erase the fact that I didn't want to leave him, but I guess it made me feel more comfortable with the idea. I'd be gone only for a couple days, so it wasn't a long period of time.

But then, it became longer than expected.

__________________
Hey lovelies,

Just so you know, my chapters are going to be shorter than usual as the end is coming... I love to keep you waiting *Vincent Price's laugh* muahahahahahahahahahah.
I love you though, all of you. You're amazing!

Julie

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