84.Then

"If love is pain then honey let's hurt tonight"

.Feb 10th

Harry plops down beside me on the couch ,taking the remote from the table in front of us and changing the channel. He puts an arm around me and pulls me closer to him and I hesitantly snuggle against him.

I've been planning for some days now to break up with him cuz I know he deserves someone better than me. The only problem is I don't know what to say or how to start

"Is it okay that I changed - " Harry starts but I cut him off "its okay, I wasn't interested on the show "

What should I say? I have to do it fast before its to late.

The whole time that Harry is watching TV I try to gain some strength to tell him a lie which I planned on telling him . Finally he senses my odd behavior

"Are you okay pumpkin? You been quite for quite sometime" He turns his head a little but also keeping his attention on his favorite show . "I'm starting to get worried, Are you okay?"

Finally he turns fully to me. I try my very best to speak without crying

"Harry, I have to tell u something, let's say I have a problem . Yeah a problem " I stammer and turn my full attention to him

Harry turns the volume down. I have no idea how I'm gonna lie to him

"What is it pumpkin? Tell me. Tell me so I can help u to solve it " he begs with fear in his eyes

"There is no solution" I say looking at my lap and fighting the urge to cry

"Of course there is. Just tell me and I figure a way to solve it" he encourages

"Yes there is a solution but I'm afraid you won't like it" I tell him seriously. He becomes silent after that. I look up and see him breathing heavily with his eyes closed. Then he opens them to reveal so much of pain which will burst my emotions any minute

"Is it what I think it is?" He whispers

"I don't know what your think"

"Are you trying to break up with me? That's why ur distancing yourself from me?" He says with glossy eyes.

"I loved you so much Harry but its just-" he cuts me off "Just what Infinity ? Tell me . oh I know what it is. I should have expected this long time ago when I saw the news but I was a fool. Thought you loved me but the truth is just as the news read 'Singer Infinity Trevor is having a fling with Jade Cordon ' .You wanna break up with me because Money changed you and made you fall for him" He yells in frustration and stands up

The tears which I've been fighting wins over me and comes out.

"That's not true. I only loved you . I always did . I don't love anyone else. And money did not change me" I yell back and stand up

"Then tell me. Tell me why"

"You and me don't work anymore Harry. " I lie

"What do mean we don't work anymore ? Tell me so I can make it work" Harry urges me desperately

"There is nothing you can do to fix it Harry. Its just I don't feel the way I used to feel. My feelings just stopped. I don't know how or why. But when I look at you I feel nothing" I lie with all my strength and control my tears.

Harry just stares at me for awhile

"If u don't know how it happened . how do u know u don't that u don't love me" he asks with so much of pain in his voice

"I started to love are memories we had not what we r now. I guess its just that we fell in love too early that I lost my feeling too soon " I try explaining my lie

"I thought about this for a long time and it I thought that its best for us to end it cuz I don't feel love anymore. U rather live with someone who loves you than with me"

"Fine let's break up. If that's what u want then fine" he says holding so much of hurt in every word he whispered.

He walks away to our room. I fall on the couch and burst into tears.

Its over . its over. I'm an orphan from now on. I don't have anyone.

He comes back out dragging his trolley along and holding a small bag in his hand. I quickly wipe my tears and stand up. I walk up to him.

"Just know that my love for you was real" i whisper

He takes me back when he crashes his lips on mine. The kiss we share is rough and slow. This is our last kiss. Thinking of it makes me cry more but I fight it.

"Didn't u feel anything?" He pulls away and ask with hope

"No " I lie

Of course I felt love

"I hate you" you says walking towards the door

"Its okay u can hate me" My words make him stop but he doesn't turn around

"No I love you so much that I hate you for giving up on us so easily. I can never hate you. Just know that know matter what I won't stop loving you" he says and leaves my house

I watch as he walks down the walkway. Suddenly he stops and looks at the small bag he is hold. I frown when I see him throw it onto my  yard and walks away. Once he is out of sight I rush to the walkway. I look around in the direction he threw the bag. Finally my eyes land on it. I kneel down on the grass and take the little bag in my hand. I pull out a small box from inside the bag. I open the box and find a diamond ring inside.

A ring?

He was gonna propose to me?

Thinking of it made me burst into tears. I stand up hold the box in my hand as I run into my house. I become so frustrated and agitated with myself that I start screaming and crying. What ever I get in my hand I fling it at the wall. I kick and push things in my way as I make it to my room. I stand in front of the glass and look at myself.

I see a miserable looking orphan sobbing in it. I bang my head on the mirror. I feel blood dribbling down my head. I laugh at myself like an idiot.

"See what you did" I yell at my reflection

"YOU BROKE HIS HEART"

"YOU MADE HIM CRY "

"YOU CAUSED HIM PAIN"

I clench my hand and fist the mirror making it crack in pieces. I take a big piece of glass and hold it tight. As blood dribbles from my palm I make my way to my bed.Some glass pieces that lie on the floor dig my feet making it bleed but I enjoy the pain cuz it nothing compared to the pain he is going through. I keep the glass piece on my bed and take a book and pen from the drawer near the bed. I sit down and tear a paper from the book. With my wounded hand I write him a letter.

Dear Harry,

  When this letter reaches you I'll be no more. Don't cry because I'm dead cuz you don't deserve someone like me. I'm so sorry that I hurt you. Everything I told u that day was a actual lie. I really do love you and I always did. The actual truth is that I was caught in such a situation that I had to break up with you. If I didn't I would have lost u forever. I was in a situation that I couldn't escape therefore I saved you and decided to end my life because i couldnt escape.Plz find someone u truly loves u and live happily with her. Just remember that I'm watching over you and I still love u.

Love Infinity.

I fold the paper and keep it beside me. I take the glass piece and hold it by my wrist.

"I'm so sorry"

Just as I'm about to rip my skin someone taps the glass piece out of my hand.

"What the hell I wrong with you?"

I lift my head and find my friend staring at me.

"What are u doing?"

I stand up and cling onto her.I sob on her shoulders

"Shh baby what happened?"

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23rd September 2009

If it wasn't for Sofija that day I would have been dead. After Jade came to know what happened he apologized and asked me to Marry him claiming that he actually did everything because he loved me

So here I am getting ready for my wedding with the devil.

I was supposed to walk down the aisle with Mom and get married to the man I love but me being the unlucky one I'm gonna walk down the aisle all alone as an orphan and get married to the Devil.

I'll never forgive him.

The knock on the door zaps me out of my thoughts. My I hear Katlin open the door.

"Infinity someone is come to see you" she says

I stand up and turn around. I see the woman who brought me up stand by the door. I stand confused hss tears roll down my cheeks. She walks in and I see Sofija walk in with her.

"I knew you wanted her. So I told her everything and brought her here" Sofija says with a smile.

I run and cling onto Mum. She wraps her arms around me as I cry on her shoulders.

A "Its okay baby. Don't cry on your wedding day"

Me "I'm sorry mum"

A "its okay. Its not your fault."

Me "How is he?"

A"he's been crying in his room ever since"

I sob more

She pulls away and wipes my tears

A "Listen. Now don't cry. You don't want to ruin your make up. Don't worry about him I'll take care of him. He'll be okay"

Me "does he know?"

A "No. Now C'mon put on your shoes let's walk down the aisle "

I nod. I put on my shoes and sit down so that Katlin does some fink touch up. Then I stand up and link my hand with My mum's

Guess I'm not an orphan anymore

Before we leave I hug onto Sofija

"Thank you Sof . Thanks for everything"

~~~~~The end~~~~~~~

This is actually a epilogue of THEN . since from here the very first chapter of now continues ,I named it PREVIEW. Hope u understand.

Thank u for reading...
Mistake is officially over
But it continues in the sequel

The sequel is called REMEDY
Go read it now.....