A/N: Hi everyone! Welcome to my story. It used to be on AO3 (still is) but I decided to bring it here as well, and it can be a tad confusing to read on there.

Thank you for clicking on this book. It is kind of based on my real life but with a twist.

This story was originally written to honestly just to get my writing inspiration back.

I do not own the characters of this story, this doesn't reflect how the life of Jimin, Jeongguk, Taehyung, or any other members of any other groups or celebrities that may appear. This book is entirely my idea so if there's a book that happens to have this same idea, it's entirely coincidental.

If you prefer to not read it as fanfiction, it is ALSO AVAILABLE AS AN ORGINAL STORY on this account haveagreatday13

Heavy topics that will be discussed in this book include self-harm, suicide, depression, and anxiety.

Also, it will be a slow-pacing story, for we will have to learn about Jimin and Taehyung's past relationship before we can understand their relationship in the present. Also, this book tends to revolve around the relationships around the characters, not the ships, therefore, some characters may or may not end up together.

This book is an ALTERNATE UNIVERSE, not so much a love story.

This is entirely FICTION. As I mentioned, whoever is mentioned in this book is in no way connected to how they are in real life.

One more thing: Have fun reading!!

LETS GOOOOOO

(1354 words)
________________________

December 30, 2020

Many have said this before but being alive is hard. If not all of us, most of us don't know what to do once we're here. And when we ask for guidance, we're often told to "figure it out".

What does that even mean?

We didn't ask to be put placed on Earth just to be left abandoned in the dust, let alone, to live in general but here we are. Living, breathing. Why is life so difficult to get through? How come when we're so confident we're ready, we're not? Many have come up with the answer to what the meaning of life is. However, all conclusions have led to having one thing in common:

Happiness.

What is happiness? The lack of worry? The smile on one's face? Peace? Where can one get it because it sounds heavenly.

That's an easy answer. One can't. Life is not going to hand over the reward before you win the tournament. But don't worry. They say happiness will come into your life once it makes you strong.

For now, focus on an easily detected emotion: sadness.

Unlike happiness, sadness is different in everyone's eyes. It's visible yet invisible. It's loud yet quiet. It's blue yet gray. The beauty of tears forming in a person's eyes yet the pain of a heart breaking.

We're human. Emotions make us human.

Perhaps that's the reason sadness is more common than its beaming sister.

Sadness is always supporting Happiness when she's down and Happiness is always making sure Sadness has someone to lean on. They're from the same place, like life and death, and we often tend to forget that.

Jimin sits at the desk he has in his dark bedroom. He writes frantically in his notebook, occasionally replaying the video his teacher instructed him to watch. The bright light from the screen bothers him and his eyes feel droopy. Every time he yawns, he blinks before getting back to writing and listening.

His parents must have already fallen asleep. Jimin wanted to sleep as well but just for tonight, he wanted to finish this part of his assignment so he could revise it tomorrow morning. His brain was fried to where he was no longer sure what he was writing down. For Jimin to keep writing, he would stop to massage his sore hand and stretch until the knot on his back didn't bother him much.

Jimin misses going to school.

Over the course of virtual school, he had gotten a few anxiety attacks here and there. Thankfully, he had a loving and supporting family and he was grateful for that.

Finally, after what felt like hours, he closed his notebook and put his pencil down, yawning. He stood up from the wooden chair and stretched his body, also cracking his fists in the process. He thanked God the day was over, walking over to his computer to charge it for the night.

Walking over to the nightstand beside his bed, Jimin rubbed his sleepy eyes once again. The cold surface of his phone woke him up for a second as he turned it on, waiting for the white, bitten apple logo to appear on his small, dark screen.

The digital clock read it was past midnight. Below it, Jeongguk's messages and notifications from his fanfiction app and Tiktok flooded the screen. 

Friendship🖤✔️
Hey

Friendship🖤✔️
helloooooooo

Friendship🖤✔️
You alive?

Friendship🖤✔️
Ight you dead to me too😒

Friendship🖤✔️
Can I come over tomorrow

Friendship🖤✔️
I'm bored 😫

Friendship🖤✔️
Jimin.🙁

Friendship🖤✔️
Hellooooo

It was an endless hurricane of messages from his best friend. Jimin chuckled as he read some of them, deciding to just text him back, even though he knew Jeongguk was probably asleep at this hour. 

Moonlight🤍
What do you want

Moonlight🤍
Yes you can come

Moonlight🤍
Good night friendship

He set his phone down, crawling into his soft bed. As soon as Jimin got comfortable enough to fall asleep, he remembered he needed to brush his teeth.

At first, he debated whether or not he should get up, yet logic won the argument. He groaned, rolling out of bed to walk to the nearby bathroom with one eye open slightly. He brushed his teeth, quietly humming a song to himself to track time. After he brushed his teeth and dried his lips, he headed back to his room.

Before crawling into bed again, he picked up his phone to check the time. However, that wasn't what caught his attention. He stared at the date hesitantly.

December 30

Jimin planned to do this a while ago to unlock his screen and go to his contacts, searching for the person in mind's name.

"Taehyung", it read; with a black checkmark next to it.

Jimin clicked on the contact and selected "Message." 

Emerald💕
Hi. Happy Birthday.

It was simple, quick, and enough. Once again, Jimin shuts his phone off, leaving it to charge although he didn't use it today. As he tossed and turned to regain the comfortable position, he heard a quick vibration from his phone. 

Taehyung✔️
thank you so much. i'm so sorry
i haven't been able to respond.
i'm really caught up with school
and other things :(( i miss you
so much💕💕

For some reason, an understandable one, Jimin was quick to respond.

Emerald💕
It's okay. I've been busy too.

He sent it. Before he turned off his phone, he anticipated a response from the other. As usual, he didn't get one. So instead, he typed words that he couldn't tell were real or not. However, Jimin understood himself.

Emerald💕
Miss you too.

Over time as things changed, Jimin hadn't seen or talked to his first-ever friend. It wasn't any of their faults. They simply chose to go different paths, hoping to reunite in the future. Their short friendship lasted for a while, with Jimin even meeting his first "love" during that time.

Possibly. Maybe.

He's not sure. Jimin was only in middle school when they stopped talking.

But if Taehyung was his first love...

Why is it easier to love others... as to when someone is gone, not to miss THEM, but the IDEA of them?

Jimin knows he knows himself. Does he miss Taehyung?

Well, he misses when they would play during recess together. He misses... just that.

No, he doesn't miss Taehyung.

But he wishes to see him again.

________________________

A/N: Welcome to "Missing The Idea of You"

I hope that you enjoyed the first chapter. As you can see, there will be multiple flashbacks, therefore, many character interactions. You might even be surprised at who you spot here.

I hope you guys will enjoy this story!!

Love you all and I hope you have many great days!!!