Few Days Later.

Sanskar Maheshwari, even the name felt alien to him. He had thought that he had out grown the name until he realized Pari was his robin and it didnt feel right when she kept calling him Arjun ,so he asked her to call him by his name.

   The name he liked hearing from her as a child, and since his identity crisis had reached its peak, he no longer could hide behind a name ,the world were aware that Rajeev and Sanskar are one and the same.

Because he was made vulnerable it was had become more vital to find the person as he need to be able to protect Swara and his daughter from her. Swara had already escaped death twice and they may not be fortunate the next time, he had been too busy contemplating on finding her that he had spend most of his days locked up in his room that the sudden flash of light made him blink quite a few times as he realized he was sitting in an dark room.

" You cant keep doing this Sanskar, you spent the whole day locked up in this room starring at the board as if the answer would be found if you just kept starring at it. You need to take rest and Asha misses you , nothing is more important than Asha " Swara spoke up as she looked at him ,and he found the source of light to be from the candle she had been holding in her hand, he had lost himself in his wandering thoughts he didnt even realize the power was cut.

" I know Swara but if she learns you were alive.. Then.." Sanskar couldnt finish the thought as his mind was filled with concern and worry about Swara welfare.

" Do you know how i feel about this ,i have been hiding Sanskar from the entire world because some nameless stranger wants to kill me ,do you think i dont feel the frustration as well because the only thing that could help us would be if i could get back my memory, i have seen her twice Sanskar and forgot to remember her face both of the times.

    Do you think i dont feel guilty that my brain is short circuited but if i let myself drown on the things i cant do,  then i cant do anything else." Swara spoke up and Sanskar realized that he had been too self centric in his troubles that he had forgotten to think about others.

" You are right.  I am sorry, Let go outside and i promise to stop starring at the board " Sanskar promised himself as he walked towards the girl he loved and wanted to marry not that she knew about it but ever since he learnt that she had been his Robin, he had began to wonder if his life would have taken a different turn if only he met her that night.

" Again, you are thinking about something " She gently scolded him and he didnt correct her assumption by clarifying he was thinking about her . And Sanskar realized Swara had been right when it felt so right to hold his daughter as he walked out of the room ,she launched into his arms , he knew moments like this are to be treasured,so he decided to spend the entire day with his family and forget about her for now.

" Do you have any of the letters i sent you" the question from Swara during dinner surprised him, he had told her about their past since it was her right to know but he couldnt bring himself to tell her that he had fallen in love with her ,even without seeing her .

    They wrote to each other every single day until she graduated from her college. The months have felt like a year and he felt like he knew her all their life and they haven't been separated for any period of time.

  Yet he had been cautious ,he had wanted to meet her in person first before letting her knew about his feelings but the visit didnt happen and she disappeared from his life.

" Yes.. but why " he asked her instead who told him that she wanted to read her younger self thoughts and that if the letters were her way of reconnecting with Sanskar then maybe she can reconnect with her past self as well, he understood her intentions that he made it his first priority to give her those letter after dinner.

She. took them and went back to her room to read in privacy which left him occupied with his daughter until she fell asleep, dida was visiting Sakshi house as it was his mother in law birthday and he wasnt invited because no one wants to make her unhappy.
 
              ----------------------

      Pari or Swara has Sanskar had taken to call her now was lost in her letters, when she asked Sanskar about it ,she didnt expect that he would have saved all of her letters that it filled an entire suitcase.

       She had started reading from the very first letter she sent till the last one, the letter where her younger self had been too excited to meet him for the first time after so long. She never asked Sanskar why he couldnt make it that day but what she couldnt understand was why her younger self refused to contact him again.

If Sanskar had even sent half of the letters as much as she did then they obviously had a good friendship that she could have forgiven him for missing out on meeting her even if it was all they planned for the last few months according to the letters .

    It not only gave her insight into her younger self but also made her aware that her feelings run deeper than friendship, maybe it was because it was written by her but the letter was like a window into her past that she had forgotten. And maybe it had been the key to unlock her mind that when she woke up the next day, her head was filled with all the memories that were long forgotten.

      Swara wanted to tell Sanskar, but then she realized why she cant as she realized she remembers everything   except her face, the face that he need to know. She tried to focus and think clearly but her face continued to evade her leaving her frustrated and angry.

  
       She didn't think Sanskar would be delighted to know her memory returned missing the important piece of information he needed but realized she was being to quick to pass on judgement in fear , her past self had kept lot of things without confiding in him and if she learnt anything now was the fact she doesnt want any secret between them ,it was reason   she needed to make up her mind  as she walked towards his room .

   Swara was nervous and surprisingly found his room empty and she realized he must be in his office yet again starring at the story board trying to find her, she had those answers to some extent but it would come at a great personal cost. She knocked at his office door until he opened it and his face fell at the sight of her anxious face.

" I got my memory back but not her face" She blurted out, she expected him to be disappointed but was surprised when he hugged her with a smile, she soaked in his happiness because she who had longed for the memories had learnt that it always come with a price.

" So what do you remember?" he asked few moment later when she was seated in his office room.

" I remember the night Sakshi was killed, i remember everything about the night when i was in the hospital but the memories are blank after that as all i can remember is waking up in the hospital with a bullet wound.

  Then i remember the night before the wedding as well but her face remains unclear ,my mind refuses to let me breach the barrier" Swara spoke up and waited to see him get frustrated just like her instead she couldn't decipher his gaze .

" Do you remember me , Remember Us ?"Sanskar asked her instead and she realized how it must have been to him to be the only carrying the memories of their friendship when she all but forgotten him .

" Of course I do Sanskar ,who would have predicted that we would ever meet again under this circumstances ,but if my memory serves right then I had seen in you on that night as well and yet I never recognized you back then ,if I did maybe I could have did everything differently " Swara spoke up wishing her choices didn't lead her back to her home that night where her life would get destroyed .

" Why did you never tried to contact me after that night " Sanskar asked her then and she realized it was something that was hard to confess .

" Because  I had been in an accident that night on the way back home  ,awhile I wasn't seriously injured my parents insisted to go for a full check up the next day where I learned that my heart was having some troubles , I know how you suffered in your childhood Sanskar  and I couldn't make you face it again ,so I decided to stay away " Swara answered back waiting for him to react but he remained silent .

" It wasn't you decision to make Shona . " he answered back few minutes later and she knew he was right but back when she first found herself with the decision to make it had been an easy one ,she had been in love with him and meeting him would only bound him to her for life and she didn't wish for him to get trapped with taking care of her .

" I know Sanskar ,but back then the doctors told me that I would need a transplant soon or else I won't make it , I wasn't going to force you to be part of my life when you could lose me in few months . " Swara answered back ,she hadn't know back then that the soon would last almost two years .

Two years of her life that she could have spent with Sanskar , she continued to work every day but never was charged with surgeries due to her heart condition ,it limited her scope but she liked helping out to her capabilities and it was how she happened to be working on the night of Sakshi murder because she had been on duty that night .

" You are fine now right , it close to four years " Sanskar asked her and she heard the underlying worry in his words .

" Yes I am fine ,I got my transplant . You know I had a condition called Dextrocardia which meant the donor match were bit complicated ,it was the reason i survived that night because my heart apex was located on the right side of my body . When I woke up the next day with a bullet wound ,I also had an new heart . My mother gift after her death " Swara spoke up and the tears began to fall freely they were no longer strangers but her parents and it was like she was reliving the truth all over her again .

" The report from the doctor did say you have had few surgeries in the past , I just didn't know how much you been through Shona " he spoke up as he gently held on to her consoling her as she continued to cry over everything she lost that night .

P.S :" That it for now . I usually don't like to add too many unbelievable elements in the story , writing Swara past made me feel that logically it was stretch too far , my medical knowledge remains zero so i do feel like one of ITV writers at the moment ,the only reason I can give is that I had been too focused on the present that I couldn't shape up the past well enough . Sorry for that , let me know your thoughts and feedbacks .Hit the votes if you liked it "

Juanita Reid .