Miraadhya

Rajaji has been busy for weeks now, barely giving me any time and no matter how much I try to understand, it doesn't help me with my bubbling anger.

He still sleeps with me but it's usually very late at night when he sweeps into the covers joining me while I am deep into my slumber and wakes up way too early before I could see him, it's always a feathery kiss that I would feel on my lips that would stir me up from my sleep and I would nuzzle closer to him basking in his scent.

Seeing him during the day has also become difficult because either he keeps visiting the city or attending meetings.

It is now I realise that I am actually married to a King and not a common man and as his title suggests he would be busy.

But always busy is not something I am okay with.

Also when he doesn't seem to do anything about hiding our relationship from other's.

Just a week ago I saw him walking down the hall to attend a meeting, he saw me and a beautiful smile had spread on his face.

I thought he would walk right past me as there were several servants standing, but he literally held my hand giving it a quick but lingering kiss. I had to jerk my hand off from him feeling conscious and seeing around me if anyone had seen anything.

There were a pair of prying eyes witnessing his public display of affection and it got ridiculous when Rajaji inhaled a portion of my hair and gave a small kiss on my cheeks as well. He had whispered- "God I have been missing your smell and now I am fully recharged."

In some other situation I would have profusely blushed but seeing how shocked the face of those women looked made my anxiety level higher than usual. Before I could have confronted him he had already left.

I had to talk to him for his little stunts with me and also remind him of keeping our marriage as a secret pact but that was only possible if he would have time for me.

For now I have been busy with painting and sighing while glancing towards my right, at the pile of pages that have been completed.

My dear husband had put me on task of making beautiful decorative paintings which he's been effectively supplying to the city. He also instructed me to keep my name on them which I was very reluctant to but seeing how he assured me that it will not create any issues I gave in.

Still I would write my name in extra small letters so it would not be visible at first glance.

I too wanted to go to the market after what I have been hearing that people were actually buying my paintings but the courage to face them was not something I still felt fully.

But I couldn't help but huff in frustration, the effects witnessed by my recent painting which held hard strokes and lines- it was already ruined.
It was not because I was painting continuously, it is something I love to do, but not seeing Rajaji for weeks- weeks was definitely taking a toll on me.

I just missed him, missed his smile- his touch - his presence.

And as I sit in front of my ruined canvas, seeing the clutter around me while I glance towards the study where Rajaji would mostly sit with his papers, he would always have a little frown on his head while reading through the papers, while I had grown a habit of stealing glances at him. Seeing it empty made my heart ache.

I was angry- no I was livid.

"Miraadhya!" Suddenly His voice made me stand up from my chair, dropping everything on the floor and not even bothering to clean my paint stained hands. I stride towards him.

He entered into the chamber with high spirited energy, a grin on his face but upon seeing me his face faltered into a much serious expression, must have noticed the scowl and anger on my face.

"What happened Shona?" He asked cautiously taking slow steps towards me.

"You tell me what happened.!" I intended to keep my voice calm devoid of any emotion but it came out more of an accusation laced with obvious hurt and anger.

"Have I done something wrong?" His confusion angered me further and I squinted at him, my arms wrapped around me as my feet tapped on the floor.

"How can the King be ever wrong?" Turning away from him I step back creating a considerable distance between us but he was quick to cover it and stood behind me, his hot breath fanning over my neck.

Ignoring the shiver that went through my body I stood stiffly.

"When his Queen says he is wrong."

Damn him of saying always the right things, I had to bite my lower lip to prevent the smile from slipping away.

"I have completed new sets of paintings, you can take them off."

I move further to get away only to be held by him, his big hand engulfing mine with a sturdiness that makes me falter in my steps, he pulls me closer and my back hits his hard chest with an  impact which makes me yelp. His grip loosens and then I feel his both arm encircling me under my breast.

"Well I can take other things off if you would like." My body automatically gravitates towards his hold as his husky voice make me shutter my eyes for a second.

But almost painfully and immediately I straighten myself, slapping his arm on me and moving out from his grasp to face him.

"Besharam hai aap."

"You are shameless."

"Areee kiya kya hai humne?"

"What have I done?" He again asks aggravating me.

"Yeh bhi kya hum hi bataye?"

"Am I now supposed to tell you this as well?"

Was I being irrational? Maybe. Did I care? No.

"Agar aap hume nai batayi gi toh hume kaise pata chalega Miraadhya. Kuch hua hai kya?"

"If you don't tell me how will I know Miraadhya. Did something happen?"

A slight pang of guilt hits me hearing his worried voice and seeing his concerned eyes but that stayed for few seconds before my anger again resurfaced.

"Aapko pta bhi kaise chalega agar humare saath kuch hua hai bhi ki nai? Aap rehte kaha hai humare saath."

"How will you know if something happened to me? Do you even stay with me?"

There was it. The realisation and guilt. He understood why I had been upset. He ruffled his hairs, a deep sigh leaving him as he cautiously stepped towards me which I let him.

He took my hand drawing small circles with his thumb and I pretended that that mere touch was not melting me into his arms.

"I know I have been so busy these days. I am so sorry. I should have been there with you but please understand I have been really busy with the new reforms- the administrations-"

I cut him off stepping away from him.

"I know you have been busy with the new reforms you have been working on for reviving the kingdom. Why not include me? You know I am very well equipped handling such matters. Or is it that you don't consider me as someone who could have any say on this?"

"No! Definitely not!" He hurriedly said but I was already on another zone.

"Marriage is a shared responsibility. Are you like other men then? Who disrespects their wife. Who would not regard them?"

"Miraadhya you are overreacting."

"I am overreacting? You don't come and visit me for weeks Rajaji. Weeks. I see you once in a while and even then you either would be busy or unabashedly show your affection towards me in front of everyone! Did you forget we are to keep our marriage a secret!"

I blabbered loosing my own thoughts in the process, at one point I didn't even realise what I was saying.

"Are you angry at me for not showing you affection or showing it in front of others?" The subtle frown on his forehead while asking me this question was annoying me further, I felt my cheeks turning hotter and preety sure they must be looking red by now.

"Just leave ! I don't want to see you." I finally say.

His scowl deepens enticing a slight worry in me but I masked it well with my stoic expression.

"No. I will not leave." He said affirmatively holding me again in a tight grip. I struggled in is hold, yelping and grunting to escape but of course he was much stronger than me so I stilled.

He efficiently pushed me towards against the pillar and caged me with his huge body. I didn't dare to look up at him  fearing the tears I have been holding in would come out. His grip on my hand loosened and I immediately wrapped my hand around me.

His finger slowly traced the outline of my face to palm my cheek, I involuntarily pressed it against his rough calloused hand, the comfort soothing me.

"I am so sorry. You are the most important person in my life, never say that I don't consider you because everything I do is by taking you into consideration."

The words made my heart heavy while His soft caress on my neck was enough to make me look at him.

"I cannot bear to see you being treated no less than a Queen. Honestly I don't care keeping our marriage as a secret, I love you and if I wanted to kiss my wife then I would do the same." He said and instantly gave me a slow chaste kiss on my lips, his lips lingered on me for a bit, nibbling on my lower before he pulled away. I almost wanted to pull him back.

"But-" I whisper worried of the reprucussiom

"And I have been preparing something big these days, something which will ensure you are treated right."

"I am treated right." I say thinking of the changes I had noticed these days,

Initially the wicked stares that I-would be getting from maids and servants had considerably reduced. The things I would hear about myself had miraculously disappeared. Even Medha- my handmaiden stopped hearing bad words about me, words like I am a witch- a monster.

Still it scared me what could happen if they know we are married and I am not just a mistress to him? Will the people revolt again? What if they hurt him?

"What have you been up to?" I ask instead,my frown deepening with suspicion.

He gives me a lopsided wicked grin as if he had done something mischievous and that whatever he has done seems to be successful.

"In a week's time I am planning to host a big feast for the people." He says not really answering my question. "Just trust me okay. I don't want you to worry about it." He held my gaze expecting a response and even though I was not sure I nodded lightly choosing to trust him.

"Couldn't you tell me what you are up to?" I ask in a much calmer voice, my anger dissipating with his presence. Sometimes it scares me how much he affects me and my mood.

"I will. I promise but next week after the feast." He gives me a forehead kiss and looks at me lovingly like I am some rare jewell. It's his eyes that assures me and I sigh hugging him properly.

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