Miraadhya

We lay silently on his huge bed, the light of dawn hitting the room at the centre. I slowly caress his head- his cheeks squished on my bosom  while his heavy arms wrapped around my waist. His eyes are shut but I know he is not asleep.

"Rajaji" I whisper.

"Hmmm" he hums and snuggles more into me which inevitably makes me smile in awe, this grown up man is surely a baby.

"You were very rude to me earlier, the way you ordered me to leave the battlefield, I didn't like it." I speak softly, I wanted  to let him know that in any case I don't and won't accept his rudeness.

He falls silent and for a second I think he might get angry but when he sighs and turns his cheeks to look at me with those beautiful orbs - which had no tint of anger whatsoever I give him a soft smile.

"I am so sorry.... It's just that...." he stops and gets up to sit on the bed and I immediately miss his presence and his warmth. I had to stop myself from pulling him into me.

"It's...I didn't wanted you to see me like that." He speaks sadly and I jolt up.

"Like what?"

"Like I am some kind of animal who scavenges men like his prey. I didn't want you to have that image of me killing men in your head." He gives me a side glance and seeing the dejection in his eyes made my heart heavy.

"Rajaji..." I hug him from behind- his warmth again embracing me and I think of ways to comfort him.

"You fight to protect- you kill to save. This may be brutal but that's how a war is won. I don't want you to hide any part of yours- I would accept them all.  Because I know you are a good man who will never let his people get in trouble." I try to sincerely say my words, feeling absolutely true.

"You are too good to me." He says holding my hand and spreading my fingers to clutch them with his.

"You know everything about me, even the darkest parts, parts which I am ashamed of and yet you treat me so well. So you are the one who is too good to me." I murmur feeling overwhelmed.

But then I find myself pulled over and I yelp in surprise. Rajaji makes me sit on his lap and stares me down deeply.

His squinted eyes and a slight smack of his lips makes me gulp when I feel him pinching my waist.

"Ahhh" I see him in annoyance when he again pinches me.

"Ahhh! What the hell are you doing?" I scold him and try to get up but he is way stronger than me.

"Aab aayi na meri sherni ki awaz"

"Now my tigress has spoken" he smirks .

"Is this funny to you?" I huff.

"A brave woman like you should never be embarrassed of something which you had no control over. You are a survivor and I am proud of you Miraadhya. You are truly my inspiration " he says softly tucking a loose strand of my hair.

His eyes had depths where I wanted to drown myself , his brown orbs shining more through the morning light as he kisses my cheeks softly.

When I feel his tongue -only then I realise he is kissing away my tears.

"Aap sach mai humari aaradhya ho"

"You truly are my prayer " he eyes our clutched hands with deep thoughts and I couldn't form any coherent sentence being completely awestruck by this man.

"If I had known being kidnapped would have lead to you I would have come willingly without protest" I say my thoughts.

"Hahahahah" Rajaji laughs, his toothy smile reaching his eyes as he shakes his head adoringly. I make a mental note to make him laugh more often.

"What?" I say through my own laughter.

"We need to get married as soon as possible. I cannot wait to be completely yours and you mine" he speaks with urgency and I grow red like a beetroot.

"Kya aap bhi?" I lightly hit his chest while I try to hide my face in shyness.

"Ki? Biyer prothom ratri ekashate katabe na?"

"Kya? Suhagrat nai manana humare saath."

"Chup Rahiye " I try to wiggle my way away from his lap but the movement causes him to hiss and I cower more into shyness.

"Chup rehne to kehkar aap khud awaz nikalne ki vyawastha bana rahi ho.

"Asking me to shut up while you yourself are making situation ." his smug look covers his face and mine turns a shade darker.

"I can't wait to see you as my bride. And taking off that red saree would be more exciting " he whispers huskily keeping his lips inches apart from my ears as his hot breath fans over my red skin.

I swear I find myself twitching in a very forbidden place hearing his words and I immediately knock my knees together in hurry— the action which didn't go unnoticed by him making my heart go wild while his pupils dialate.

He slowly bites his lips and I couldn't stop staring like a hawk- the slight action so devious yet so exciting.

"This won't work" he suddenly grunts and while holding me in his lap gets down from the bed in one swift movement.

"What are you doing?" My shrill yet nervous voice echoes in the big room, my eyes shot open when I see him taking us towards the bathing room.

His firm hands lay on my hip and within seconds I am wrapped around his waist, my both legs behind his back, my saree curled up on my knees as a mere thin fabric separates my aching femininity from his lower abdomen.

He walks swiftly and with each stride my hips jerks in his hand causing friction between us.

"Fuck" he hisses as his eyes zeroes to my lips like a hunter.

I had barely any time to register what just happened and to feel so hot and warm made my vision blurry.

"Some....someone will come" I fumble with my words which I have no clue about.

"It's the king chambers . No one will dare to come" he grunts as we reach the bathing area.

He walks straight into the water which was chilling cold.

"Ahh" an involuntary moan escapes my mouth with the contact of my hip with the cold water, he doesn't even get bothered with it.

His legs submerged into the water while I still wrapped around him. But he doesn't pull me down neither I make any effort to do so.

"So should we decide on a wedding date?" He slowly asks but my attention was on his hands which was slowly gliding from my feet towards my thighs.

"Wh...what?" I quiver when his fingers find my sensitive bud, with the sensation I push myself closer to him, the water beneath me splashing.

"Hmmmmm" he grumbles in satisfaction when his fingers finds my very wet core.

"Ummm... the wedding....we can do it....ahhhh" I moan through my words when he starts rubbing his thumb, how does he do it I have no clue but whatever he does it makes me go crazy.

"Yes go on." he urges with his sweet devilish voice.

With a sudden move he turns me, my back hitting the border of the bathing tub, my hands leaves his neck and sits either side of me on the floor.

And then he goes wild- he attacks my breast with his mouth, my eyes rolls back when I see him sucking on my hard nipple over the thin translucent fabric. I try to palm his scuffed cheeks with my shivering hands - the action turning into clutching his hairs- I pull them hard when his teeth sunk into my soft flesh.

"Ahhh Rajaji- slower" I moan, my back arching further but he doesn't seem to listen as his continues to torture.

"Rudraansh slower!" I hiss while moaning and that's when he slows down, he looks at me smirking.

"Whatever my queen commands." He whispers while pressing my heavy bosom while his tongue goes on to caress the other.

I never knew I would feel such pleasure seeing a grown man sucking on my nipple. I thought they were for babies to feed.

My eyes zeroes to his lips, his slightly scrunched forehead as he kneads on them, my lips go dry and I don't know but I wanted him more closer.

I hold his big bicep and rake my fingers through his shoulder blades— I see the exposed skin on his neck and I lick my lips.

"I....I want" I try to speak but couldn't complete but then I softly kiss his ears.

He stills and I fear I might have done something wrong- he looks at me with his heavy eyes.

"Did I do something wrong?" I voice.

"Do it again." He grunts and I jerk in his hold.

I keep my palms over his hot chest even when the water was cold we both were biting hot. I see him once for assurity and kiss his chest softly.

I use my tongue this time remembering how he did while sucking on my breast and glided my tongue over his hard skin.

"Uhhh" his heavy grunt makes me feel more bold than ever.

With a bite on the area around his collar bone I feel his heavy breaths, I continue my sucking and biting on his neck, the water splashing around us as he pulls me more close to him.

Our midriffs still touching and we in each other's arms. He glides against me  and I end my biting him hard with the tinkling sensation I just felt.

"Miraadhya" he growls and I grow more wet hearing his manly voice uttering my name.

With another glide I am panting — I am not even embarrassed at this point because I see this beautiful man biting his lips as we glide against each other.

"I need ...need to stop otherwise " he pants, his lips turning a shade redder, his eyes boring holes in me.

Our collective gasp when he again glides his length against my twitching aching part, my pelvic bone hurting with how impact full is it—

"Don't stop" I find myself moaning as I hold him in tight hold.

"Can you ....can you please...." I quiver not knowing what I need at this moment, I know I need him- I need to feel him closer and I have an idea what that means.

"What?" he questions, his mouth clutching to my neck leaving behind wet kisses.

"I...oh god....I need you" I voice breathing recklessly— my cheeks flushed.

He stops looking at me with . "Are you sure?" He asks

"Huh?" I say confused not sure if I am actually ready.

I have had nightmares of this very part of being intimate and till now whatever Rajaji has done has given me anything but pleasure but I am not sure if I am actually ready for everything.

Ever since my abuse which I have partial recollection of- it has haunted me for years making me doubt that I might never be able to completely give myself to a man because it was taken from me forcefully. I fear I will push Rajaji away - my panic rising with the thought that I will hurt him.

"Shona look at me" he says sweetly and my focus shifts to his. His soft relaxing smile automatically calming my mind. He kisses me slowly on my lips.

"We have plenty of time for that. We do not need to rush" he say's assuring me but I feel an immense guilt building up.

"I ....I" I try to find the words to tell him I might not be ready or I am afraid but the embarrassment creeps up even though he has told me multiple times to think just the opposite of what I defame myself for- but I really want him - in every way possible and if my trauma doesn't allow me to do so it will break my heart and knowing Rajaji he will immediately sense my discomfort even if I pretend to be ready.

"Whatever it is you are thinking I hope it's spicy because the water is chilling cold which has cooled down both of us" he says with a slight shiver, the edge of his lips curling into a smile.

It turns into a full grin when we both start laughing half submerged into the chilling water but the chillness within my heart subsides and it spreads with his warmth.

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