I have decided to update Imperial Love after every two to three chapters of Escort Me Baby. This way I won't put this book off for months and I'll also be getting close to completing EMB even though there's a long way to go which will get me closer to putting my focus on this.

Can I Be Him is an amazing song by James Arthur. I suggest you listen to it while reading this chapter because I think it describes the way Freddie feels.

Vote, comment, share, and ENJOY!!!

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          "What?" I slightly pulled away from his warm embrace and sat up, staring at him in surprise.

          He chuckled and sat up with me before delving into his pocket to retrieve a red velvet box. Popping it open, he revealed a ring with small diamonds embedded into the platinum band followed by a large one sitting on top. The only emotion that crossed my mind was bafflement. I didn't know how to react or what to even say. It was as if the cat got my tongue.

          "Will you marry me?" He asked again, glee twinkling in his startling green eyes. The beautiful smile on his face began fading slowly at my somber reaction.

          "Fred," I spoke softly, my voice heavy with guilt. "I..."

          "It's a no," he answered for me with a meek smile lingering on his lips. "I get it."

          He always knew how to smile no matter what. Always seeing the brighter side of things became his motto after I helped him work through his aggression and I loved that about him. Despite that amazing smile on his face, I could see the hurt hiding in the dark shadows of it, lurking beneath the surface.

"You don't get it." I sat on my knees and cupped his face, my thumbs caressing his cheeks. "You're too good for me, Fred."

Narrowing his eyes at me, he chuckled and set the box aside. "I think you're too good for me, precious." His hands fanned over mine and squeezed them gently. "I know that you don't love me."

"I do love you," I said almost immediately, not wasting a second to let him know how much I adored him. "I love you."

He smiled once again, this time caressing my cheek with his knuckles. His eyes scanned over each one of my features lovingly before gazing into my brown misty orbs. "But precious," he lifted my chin up gently. "You're not in love with me."

          I couldn't help the tear that toppled over my lid at the undertone of gloom in his voice. His face was smiling, but his heart was dropping which wrenched my own. However, the truth couldn't be denied. I did love him, but I wasn't in love because my stupid heart was still elsewhere. At least some of it was. Over the past four years, I regained most of it, yet that tiny stubborn part was still with Leo.

          "Precious," the pad of Freddie's thumb wiped away my lone tear. "I really wish I was him."

          "Him?" My brows furrowed in confusion.

          "The man you're in love with."

          "What do you mean?"

          He laughed, laying down on his side with his gaze firmly placed on me. "I met you at Athena Estle's birthday party for the first time more than four years ago," he recalled and smiled to himself. "You looked like an angel, but you were also with a man in a mask. Even though I didn't know you back then, I knew you loved him by the way you two looked at each other. It was quite evident, yet you still haven't told me about him."

"I'm not in love with him," I retorted truthfully. At least I hoped that was the case even though I deep down knew that it wasn't. "Not anymore. You're my reality. You're my present." I laid my my head on his chiseled stomach and looked up at him, my fingers drawing circles on his chest. "You really make me happy, Fred. I feel safe with you."

His hand raked through my hair as he looked down at me. "Did you not feel safe with him?"

"I did," I smiled to myself, reminiscing about the man who changed my life completely.

The way he called me 'Mia Regina' and 'My Love' still warmed my heart each time I thought of it. The way he treated me with love and laid the world at my feet was quite overwhelming, however, it felt rather good. That man always bowed down to me while he was nothing but a ruthless beast to others. I couldn't help but laugh at that thought now. He showed me a whole new world, a world full of luxury and love with him which also included stolen happiness, temporary heaven, and also inevitable destruction. A world that would destroy anyone that stepped into it. He was paradise, but a dangerous one. Too dangerous.

"We were toxic for each other," I muttered to myself. "He did things for me that he wouldn't normally do and I did the unthinkable for him. We were changing each other and we were so in love to realize it." I spoke in a trance-like state, pondering upon all that I did under his influence and vice-versa.

          He was ready to be my slave for God's sake and I think I took advantage of it. Your wish is always my command. I used that promise against him when I manipulated the man to leave and not a single day goes by when I don't feel ashamed of that. I used him and threw him away. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't disgusted with myself for being so cruel to him.

Even though it was all said and done, I couldn't help the feeling that it was all nothing but a dream. That Leo Bonferroni was a figment of my imagination, a beautiful, yet dangerous one. But then I thought about Aunt Wendy and my kids. We wouldn't be here if it all hadn't happened. However, the man still seemed like something out of my wildest, scariest dreams.

          "So, your tattoo," Fred started, his fingers feathering over the ink on my right wrist. "Till my last breath, Mio Re. What does it mean? Was it inspired by him?"

"It was a promise that I made to him a long time ago."

"What was his name?" He curiously asked.

"You wouldn't believe it even if I told you," I snickered and rolled on my back, my head still on his stomach as I stared up at the tall white ceiling.

He gasped. "Don't tell me it was Trump. Ew, Arie. That's just beyond disgusting," he fake gagged and laughed when I playfully slapped his chest. Trump... no, thank you. I don't fuck with that hair of his and his tiny hands... I'll take a massive pass on that. Melania can have fun though.

"Take a wild guess. He's quite a mysterious man. People know his name, but not his face," I said and looked at him. "He attended my graduation as a guest and handed me my diploma on the stage. He also funds your team's expenses."

"No way," he stared at me, his mouth agape. "There's no fucking way."

Laughter burst through me at his face. "Yes way."

"You dated Tristan Houser?" Now I wouldn't have been offended if it had been any other man, but considering Tristan Houser was one of the oldest men in the history of the United States of America, a man who funds the team, and also a man who sometimes swallowed his snot with his food, I'd rather swing the other way altogether. Maybe I just might like it. Being the idiot Freddie was, he always seemed to tease me with other men.

"I did not date grandpa Tris," I childishly sneered at him, narrowing my eyes.

He let out a belly laugh and rolled over in hysterical hysterics. "Your face," he continued his act. "Priceless!"

"Shut up! Maybe you're into that," I winked.

"Oh, please! I can't stand the man," he scoffed and regained his previous position. "I actually don't want to know about the man you dated or else I may have to go to war with him to win you."

"I think he'd win," I joked.

"That's because he has your heart, baby," he tapped my nose with his index finger and smiled. "Your heart is the most precious prize of all and I'm glad I got to know it."

Once again, my mouth upturned in sadness as I sat up to look down at him. "Fred, I'm sorry. I don't think I'm ready for marriage."

Chuckling, he grabbed my wrist and pulled me down next to him. "I know, precious. Your friendship and having you in my life is much more valuable to me. We don't have to be lovers. But you have to admit I'm a good lover though."

"I can't deny that," I laughed before pecking his lips, but that gesture turned into something more as I kept it there and slid my tongue into his mouth, grabbing his neck and pulling him into me.

"Wait," he pulled back and narrowed his eyes at me. "Is this breakup sex?"

I got on top and straddled him, pinning his hands above his head. "Any objections?"

          "No, ma'am," he grinned and reached up to kiss me. "I'll always love you, precious."

"I know."

***

          "Go wear your costume quickly, Lucian," I yelled at seeing him sitting on his bed and staring into nothingness. "Now."

          "Yes, mamma." He sprinted to the closet while I cradled Ana into my arms who was fake sleeping. The girl had mastered this skill at such a young age.

          "Well," I sighed and walked down the stairs to the kitchen with her in my arms. "Since Ana baby is sleeping, she can't have her favorite pancakes with chocolate syrup."

"Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate!" She jumped up in my arms and fell to the floor, forcing my heart to leap out of my chest, but the mischievous girl got up like a champ and began running in circles around the kitchen island.

          "Jesus, Ana," I breathed in relief.

          "There she is," Freddie's sleepy, groggy voice disrupted the air as he sauntered into the room and looked at Ana. "Let Arie mom make your favorite pancakes while you show me the costume that you're going to wear today."

          "Fred, you really don't have to do this."

          "Precious, we may not officially be together anymore for now," he emphasized, reminding me of what we agreed upon last night. "You guys are like my family and you're my best friend, so let me." He scooped up Ana into his arms and tickled her side, sending her into a fit of adorable giggles. "And Ana loves me too much. Isn't that right Ana bear?"

          "Yes, yes, yes," she chanted along the way as Freddie took her up.

Freddie and I agreed upon putting our romantic relationship at bay till I knew what I wanted, so I had some time to figure out my feelings and think about something as big as marriage. I knew I wanted to marry Freddie one day because I'd be a fool to pass up a man like him, but I also couldn't look over the fact that he was too good for someone like me and that my heart still slightly ached for someone else. Hopefully, this break would be good for us.

***

          "I'm going to file a restraining order against her if she shows up here again," I hissed in anger whilst putting the essentials into my purse.

"Arie, give her a chance," Ashton tried to reason with me, hovering like a damn hawk. "She's our grandma."

"Oh, really?" I snapped, whipping my gaze to him. "Where the hell was she when we needed a grandma? When we needed someone to hold us together." Rage scorched my skin as sweat broke onto my forehead in fury. "That woman didn't bother coming to our parents' funeral, her own son's fucking funeral. Did you forget that?" I pushed past and reached for my jacket, sliding it on effortlessly. "She never contacted us even when we invited her to Aunt Wendy's funeral. She didn't bother showing up and now she's here like everything is well in the damn world. She's here because you're a famous, rich man now."

"Oh, shut up," he fired back and followed me out my room as I stomped my way down the steps. "She's not a money hungry old hag. She's our grandma. Have some respect."

"I have no respect for her," I turned around and looked at him in disappointment. "I thought you'd be the one to never let her in and I would fall weak, but it's completely the opposite here."

"Because she's family, Arie," he yelled. "If you look around we don't have a lot. Aunt Wendy is laying..."

"I know where Aunt Wendy is," I interrupted him and resumed walking towards the door. "Family is not only blood, Ashton. It's the bond you create with someone. Fred, Ana, Lucian, Harry, and Aunt Wendy are all the family we need. That woman is just another woman on the street to me."

"She's not just another woman and you know that."

"You're right," I scoffed and opened the front door, stopping to look back at him. "She's the woman who abandoned her son and her grandkids when they needed her the most. That's the woman she is and shoot me when I say that I despise that woman."

"Shoot you like you shot all those men four years ago?" His voice was calm as his mouth smoothly slipped those words out.

I watched him in horror, enraged that he'd have the audacity to bring that up. "Don't go there, Ashton," I warned, fighting back my tears at the horrific memory. "I shot those men to save you and you know that. They were going to hurt you and I couldn't bear losing you. Did you forget what I lost that day? Did you forget how much I bled when I fell into your arms? While saving you, I lost something, a part of me. So, don't you fucking dare bring that up ever again."

"I'm sorry..."

          Storming down the front steps, I ignored him and neared my car in which Lucian and Ana were all strapped in. "Ashton," I glanced at him whilst opening the door to the driver's seat. "Get in the car. It's parent-teacher meeting at Lucian's school. You're going as his guardian."

          His jaw fell to the floor in bafflement. "I don't want to go to a PTA meeting."

          "Car. Now. Get your ass in."

          He didn't waste a second before I began driving us all to Lucian's school. "You're his mom. You should be going to the PTA meeting with him."

          "I was going to drop them both off at Harry's and she was going to take them to where they needed to be, but thankfully you came home. His classmate called him a liar because he said that you were his uncle," I turned onto a street and continued. "Go prove them wrong like a good uncle to Lucian."

          "Yes!" Lucian chirped up.

          "Well, Uncle Ashton is going to beat some asses up," he declared, praising himself. "Isn't that right, little Luci? I should have drove my Aston Martin. She's such a beauty. Lucian here would be the popular one in school just like his uncle."

          Almost immediately I swatted the side of his head for not censoring his mouth around the kids as Ana began chanting 'ass'. "Watch your mouth, idiot!"

          I stopped at the traffic light before Ashton saw his chance and slapped my head back. "You watch your mouth, idiot."

          "Control your hand," I slapped him across his face and heard the kids gasp, followed by their hushed snickers. "I'm driving."

I could feel him shoving daggers down my throat and rubbing his cheek for the rest of the car ride while I bit back my laughter. As soon as I parked to drop them, Ashton landed a slap across my face. "Take that. I was just waiting for the right moment," he cackled like a fucking horse and stepped out of my car before slipping Lucian out after him who was busy kicking him in the shin for hitting me.

"Ashton," I rolled the windows down and yelled at him. "The PTA meeting won't last long. After I drop Ana at the daycare, I'll come pick you up and we are going to the board meeting."

"I'd rather be here than go to the board meeting," he shouted back.

"I swear to God, I'll key all your cars, so you better be ready before I get back here."

***

"The clinic brings people in and it gives them hope for us to tend to their minor injuries or diseases that can be treated easily before it gets serious," Harry voiced her opinion, leaning forward with her hands on the table. "Believe it or not, many individuals don't have insurance and this free clinic helps them and saves their lives. I think it's a horrendous idea to shut it down."

          "I agree with Dr. Harleen Kaur, but we have to think about the hospital too," said Caden Findley, the financial advisor. "Hospital doesn't run on charity. We need money for all the latest equipments so we can save people with more serious illnesses. Money runs this hospital."

          "Mr. Findley," I spoke up and looked at the gray haired man. "As doctors we take an oath to save lives. When my brother and I bought this hospital, it was in a really pathetic place and you know that. No body wanted to come here. You've been with us the entire time, so you know of the struggles and so does Dr. Kaur." I glanced at Harry and all the other four board members which included Freddie, Ashton, Jamie Nyugen, another financial advisor, and Zarina Ahmed, head of the cardiology department.

"I'm just an intern right now, but I've built this hospital up from ground to its striking success today and you've been alongside us throughout the years, Mr. Findley. I don't see the purpose to shut down the clinic when the clinic and the hospital, both are doing exceptionally well."

"Ms. Noelle," he took a tired breath and directed his old hazel eyes to me. "If we shut down the clinic, it will be very much profitable for the hospital. We can direct the money that we put into the free clinic towards the expenses of the hospital and better our facilities."

"Noelle Clark is one of the most renowned and finest hospitals in the state of California, if not the country," Freddie disagreed with Mr. Findley and put his claim forth. "This hospital is doing brilliant as it is and we already have the best facilities and doctors for our patients. I don't see the need to remove the free clinic for the people that are unable to afford the crushing medical expenses."

          "C'mon, Findley!" Ashton shouted in frustration. "Get over yourself. The hospital is doing good and it's my fucking hospital."

          "Ashton!" I glared at him and at his poor professionalism while Freddie face-palmed at my brother's idiocy and Harry shook her head in disappointment. "I apologize for my brother's insolent behavior, Mr. Findley. But I do think it's time to vote for a decision. All in the favor of demolishing the free clinic may raise their hands."

          Mr. Findley and Mr. Nyugen raised their feeble hands, pasting a victorious smile on my face. "All in favor of keeping the clinic." The rest of us raised our hands high.

"I think it would be absolutely preposterous to shut down the clinic," Zarina commented and smiled at me. "I believe we're keeping it."

"The decision has been made, Mr. Findley," I said and rose from my seat. "The clinic will be left as it is. There'll be no shutting down of it. The meeting is over. Thank you all for coming."

Everyone began to shuffle around and empty the room, leaving only me, Freddie, Ashton, and Harry in. Without wasting another second, Ashton started flirting with Harry as usual. "So, when are you going to leave that boyfriend of yours and go out with me?" He leaned forward, cozying up to her and all I could do was gag.

Grabbing his shirt, she pulled him closer and winked. "How about now?"

"Mmm," he hummed in response and smirked. "I like the sound of that."

"Stop it!" I groaned in disgust.

          "Jesus!" Freddie laughed. "Continue this somewhere else."

          "We are messing with each other," Ashton laughed whilst putting his arm around Harry's shoulder and pecking her cheek. "She's my bestie and also Aunt Wendy's. I wouldn't dare sleep with her."

          "Didn't you guys already sleep together once?" Freddie commented and smirked to himself.

          "That was a one time thing," Harry retorted and pushed Ashton away. "Happened three years ago and it's never happening again. I'm committed to my man now."

          "And the flirting?" I shook my head at the thought of the two of them together.

          "Casual flirting between best friends," Ashton answered and pulled a hat over his head, ready to walk out the room.

          "Here," I put Freddie's hat on his head and hand him his shades. "Don't wear it unless you want girls to ambush you."

"Don't worry, precious. You're the only girl I want to ambush me," he smirked.

"Shut up," I laughed while Harry opened the door to see a herd of people standing outside, ranging from patients to doctors, and also the family of the patients. I quickly covered my face from their cameras and ducked away through the massive crowd before motioning the bodyguards to rescue the two footballers. Ugh! They act like Ashton and Freddie are some rockstars.

          "Where's the sanitizer?" Ashton sat in the car and rummaged through the dashboard like a lunatic. "Why do they fucking kiss my cheek? I'm okay with girls around my age doing that, but why grandmas?" His body shuddered in disgust as he lapped his cheeks with sanitizer and rubbed vigorously.

          "You wanted to be a footballer," I shrugged and began driving. "Now take the fame and shitty kisses."

          "And paparazzi sticking their ass into my life," he sighed like the world depended on his fragile little shoulders. "Don't you have work anyways?"

"It's my day off. I'm going to go home and decorate it for the kids tonight. You're going to take them trick-or-treating," I commanded and turned onto a different street. "You need to stop flirting with Harry like that."

"C'mon," he laughed. "She's only five years older than me and also my best friend. It's nothing serious. I wish I was ugly though."

"Why would you want to be ugly when you already are, little brother?" I laughed in his face.

          "Hilarious, Arie," he glared at me. "Ha. Ha. Ha. I'm dying of fucking laughter."

          I looked at him and pouted. "Cry me a river."

          Ashton went on to roll his eyes at me and looked ahead before his face grew pale in horror. "Arie, watch out!"

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I know it was a long chapter and I apologize. Did you guys like it or nah?

What do you guys think happened four years back where Arie talked about saving Ashton and losing a part of her?

Do you guys think Arie should forgive her grandmother?

What are your opinions on Arie's take on Freddie's proposal? Is she doing the right thing by taking a break from their romantic relationship?

Much Love
~Reet