Lightening that went across the room lit up the whole cafe for a split second .The explosive noise of it made the neighbourhood dogs howl in agony. Chilly wind welcomed itself to the cafe rotating the purple Ivies in a forced spin. It looks like it's going to be a thunderstorm.

"please, please, not now!" the adorable pair of eyes were pleading, peeking at the door every five seconds. The AI generated voice coming out of his phone, played the same voice record, making the fists on his thighs go white.

His phone is switched off. He is not at the office, not at home, no where to find. Khun James, his secretary ,was not informed about his whereabouts . He has left after meeting director Titicharoenrak in the evening. It was the last part, that made a pile of unwashed dishes stack near the sink of the cafe. Fourth has snuggled into one of the chairs, trying to contact his phi ever since he heard that the strict director has met his son. Gemini never had a good relationship with his parents. He pretended to be strong in front of his boyfriend, but he would spend days without eating or sleeping whenever he had a meeting with his father. Fourth knew, but never inquired. Instead he would spend extra hours cuddling in the morning, a special skin care session, also making his favourite chicken fried rice. The result of all of that effort was his phi Gemini's pretty smile .

But today it's different.He is there alone for hours, all by himself.

Where are you phi Gemini? Are you okay? Are you hurt somewhere? Are you in pain? Can you please answer the phone? Please a text? I want to come to you, I want to hug you, I want to hold you and give you lots of kisses until you smile at me ! Fourth clasped his chest trying to remove the suffocating feeling from there. No, he cannot be like this, not now, he should be strong, he needs to see his phi gemini and make sure he is okay. The boy swallowed the lump in his throat.

"Swadee nong" the cheerful voice coming out of the phone tasted bitter on fourth's tongue.
"Wadee phi"
"Wait, is everything alright?" he quickly caught it. The pain in his voice. Phuwin is a psychiatrist after all.
"Phi, do you know where's phi gemini?"
"Mechai nong, I didn't see him in a while, what happened, both of you okay?"
"He is missing phi, Khun James told me he left the building in a hurry in the evening and no one knows where he went, his phone is switched off too." his voice cracked.
"Was my pa there today?"
"Chai phi."
Phuwin released a long depressed sigh mumbling "of course" more to himself. But fourth heard him very clearly.
"They always ended up fighting, what if something happened, I am worried phi."
"Hey hey calm down na, that brat is strong he won't do anything stupid, wait I will come, let me fetch Satang too on my way, we are going to find him okay?"
"Thank you Phi, I will go and wait in the apartment."
"Can you go by yourself nong?"
"I will book a grab phi."
........

Gemini's pov

I sighed dipping my whole body comfortably on the seat. A five minutes break, finally. It was a long day going through hundreds of papers of the brand deal we are going to sign tomorrow. I took my phone checking my Line, but no messages have arrived from him yet. Ignoring the bunch of other annoying messages, I ended up staring at my wallpaper instead. Fourth cuddling a big plush doll of his height with the most adorable smile.

"Miss you nhoo" I pouted to the wallpaper.
"Shia, I am down bad...." I closed my eyes, embarrassed being caught talking to my wallpaper. But I continued smile like an idiot.
"Not only you got yourself a boy toy, now you are slacking off at work day dreaming about him, are you not done embarrassing us, Norawit ?" I snapped open my eyes hearing the familiar harsh voice. Hearing his voice is enough to give me goosebumps.
"Pa, what are you talking about?"

"Don't you dare play fool with me, I am talking about the orphan that you are fucking sleeping with, I matched you with so many business partners, ministers, diplomats in both genders and you choose a miserable twink over them? Are you nuts Norawit? Well you are nothing but a disappointment, but do you need to go to the extent of ruining our lives this time? Fucking answer me Norawit! "

Of course I knew my father already knew about him, he tracked every move of my life. I always bow my head for whatever my parents said, that's what they taught, never against but always loyal,like a dog.

" If I am such a hindrance, why are you wasting your time, talking to a disappointment pa?"

But not anymore. I will not shut my mouth and let them take fourth from me. I will not fight for me, but for fourth, I am happy to give up on whatever I have.

It was a fresh sight seeing my pa getting startled by my words. Cause I never talked back, this was my first time.

"What the fuck did you just say, who do you think you are to talk back to me?" his whole body was shaking with anger.

"I spent my whole life trying to live according to your expectations, giving up on my dreams, thinking that you would love me back, one day I could satisfy you. But you never bothered to talk to me if it's not to remind how much of an embarrassment and a disappointment I am. I am just a puppet for you, to show off and satisfy your greed, I thought it's okay, one day you will let me go and we will be normal, but you guys were never satisfied pa."

"Keep your emotional speech to yourself, you weak brat and leave the boy before I do it myself."

"Don't. You. Dare. Touch. Him. Pa, I will destroy everything." I threw my fist on the table.

A loud slap went across my face. It stung . But I am familiar with it .

"How dare you bastard??? We gave you fucking everything and this is how you pay gratitude?"

"Did I ask for my life pa? Did I ask to be born? It was your choice pa, not mine, nothing ever was my choice, just because you gave me life I don't need to do everything you want, I don't want to be perfect, I want to be me, I don't ask to be happy, but I want to stop this pain I am feeling, I am tired, I am exhausted, I pity myself." My sight got blurred. But I didn't stop. I needed this suffocation out. Atleast in this moment.

"This is my first life too pa, I want to make mistakes, I want to learn from them. I have lots of dreams and wishes just like a normal person pa, I want to enjoy simple moments with my family and the one I love. But what a pity, I never shared a single happy memory with my family, they were too busy trying to tell me how pathetic I am. How sorry I should be for being born. But fourth, he tries so hard to erase my bad memories though he himself had a hard life. He was the only one who tried to tell me, I am okay, nothing is wrong with me, he healed me, he made me feel how good to be loved back by someone. So don't you fucking dare lay a single finger on him. I will show you what it's feel like to be really ruined."

I saw my father's speechless figure. I knew I am going to feel bad about my sudden burst later. No matter how much trauma he planted within me, he was my father after all. But for now, I want to throw a fit for my broken inner child. He deserves it. A child could be wrong but never bad. They are innocent.

I laid myself on the sofa like a lifeless mannequin. I was having the shittiest headache. The guilt and remorse were eating me alive. I wanted to go to my fourth. I wanted to be in his arms. But what if he gets hurt seeing how miserable I am? Even thinking is giving me physical pain right now.

I managed to take my dizzy body out of the office, speeding towards my car. I need an escape from this life.

🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻
Ummm....we are reaching the end hehe