thirty five

yoongi sighed. "she just got tired and decided she needed a break, so she returned to daegu and left jonghyun with me. but i doubt she's coming back. we became parents at a very young age and i think the two of us didn't know how to handle it well enough. each time i would  leave for practices or concerts, i noticed how much she dreaded staying alone with him. she loves jonghyun, i know she does, but she was afraid of being alone because she thought she'd screw up."

"how can she want to be away from jongie though?" danna asked, looking at the little boy sat on the high chair at their table, oblivious to it all. her hand reached out to pinch his cheek gently, causing him to let out a delighted giggle. "i mean, getting away from you i can understand." she joked, crinkling up her nose, and yoongi shot her a playful glare. "but there's just no way you can or should run from away from being a parent. if jong gets sick, illness isn't going to just take a break because she's not ready. its going to happen anyway. the way i see it, maybe you two should have thought twice before having sex."

"i can't go back on it now, can i?" he raised an eyebrow at her. of course he couldn't. nor did he want to. not when he had a son as precious as jonghyun.

"well," she said, reaching onto the table to grab his phone. danna stuffed it into her purse and added. "if she doesn't want to be part of your life, then forget her." and she would forget about wanting to be with taemin. it seemed like he was perfectly fine somewhere in seoul, ignoring her. granted they never had anything official, but he led her to believe with his behavior that there was a possibility they could be together.

-

all of our co workers started asking if we were together. i think people would ask me that at least once per day. 

i remember an instance where i went into the crew room for my lunch break and there were three other staff from the kitchen there. and one of them dead ass asks me without shame. "so clary...you and A...?"

and i play dumb. "A and i what?"

and so she says. "you know what i mean. he's your boyfriend right? you can tell us. we all see the way you two flirt constantly."

so i didn't even answer. once because we didn't have a relationship. and two because it wasnt her business anyway. so i grabbed my lunch and went into the manager's office to eat. and i know they harassed A the same way whenever they saw him. but if he was gonna ask me out, i wanted us to do it on our own terms.

-clary