"Please let me paint a mental picture portrait, something you won't forget it's all about my forehead and how it is a door that holds back contents that make Pandora's Box's contents look non violent."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

CA: wwoww kar. ya honestly believve i wwould wwatch that movvie just because a the ratin ya gavve it? fuck no, its a ridiculous romantic comedy that i wwouldnt wwatch if it would savve my life.
CA: I cant have my high up social status bein tainted because i decided to take your horrible movvie recommendation an wwatch it.
CG: IT IS A HIGH QUALITY FILM DOUCHEBAG. I THE CHARACTERS EACH HAVE THEIR OWN TRAGIC BACKSTORY. THE MAIN CHARACTER DOESN'T FULLY STOP THEIR LIVES FOR THEIR MATESPRIT AND IT ALSO PORTRAYS HOW SOME MOIRAILS WILL GO TO THE EXTREME, MAYBE EVEN A BIT *TOO* EXTREME.
CG: LISTEN I CAN'Y EXPLAIN IT WELL WITHOUT GIVING AWAY THE WHOLE FUCKING PLOT SO YOU'RE JUST GOING TO HAVE TO WATCH IT.
CA: i wwont wwatch it.
CA: ya knoww wwhy?
CA: because its RUBBISH.
CG: YOU'RE RUBBISH.
CA: gasp
CA: fuck you kar. your lusus is rubbish.
CG: YEAH WELL YOUR CAPE IS RUBBISH.
CA: your house is rubbish!
CG: YOU'RE BLOOD COLOR IS RUBBISH.
CA: you knoww wwho really is rubbish
CA: vvriska.
CG: OH MY FUCKING GOD.
CG: LOOK ERIDAN, I GET THAT YOU HAVE A BLACK CRUSH ON HER BUT DUDE, YOU DON'T HAVE TO BRING HER UP CONSTANTLY. JUST ASK HER TO BE YOUR KISMESIS.
CA: im nervvous okay.
CG: ISN'T THIS A CONVERSATION YOU SHOULD BE HAVING WITH YOUR MOIRAIL? WHERE EVEN IS FEFERI?
CA: shes vvisitin her lusus.
CA: an this is somethin that needs to be discussed noww kar.
CG: FINE FINE.
CG: ALRIGHT IF YOU'RE TOO NERVOUS JUST
CG: OKAY OKAY. PRACTICE ON ME FIRST.
CA: wwhat?
CG: PRACTICE ASKING HER BY PRETENDING I'M HER. THEN IT'LL BE EASIER FOR THE REAL THING.
CG: I'LL EVEN CHANGE MY TEXT COLOR.
CA: this is fuckin stupid.
CG: DO YOU HAVE A BETTER IDEA NOOK SNIFFER?
CA: no.
CA: ugh fine.
CG: OKAY, READY.
CA: hey vvriska
CA: youre fuckin horrible and I hate your guts
CA: ya wanna be my kismesis?
CG: EW NO.
CG: WHY WOULD I EVER CONSIDER YOU A QUADRANT MATE? GO SWIM IN ANOTHER POND, GUPPY.
CA: kar!
CG: WHAT?
CA: wwhat the FUCK wwas that?! ya were supposed to agree!
CG: HEY I'M JUST TRYING TO CAPTURE HER PERSONALITY, WHICH I THINK I DID PRETTY WELL.
CA: wwere tryin that again.
CG: FINE.
CA: hey spider bitch
CA: youre a horrible piece of garbage that aint worth nothin compared to me.
CA: ya wanna be my kismesis?
CG: NO YOU WHORE.
CG: NO ONE CALLS VRISKA SERKET A SPIDER BITCH EVEN THOUGH I AM THE BIGGEST BITCH IN ALL THE PLANET.
CG: NOW I'M GONNA USE MY OVER USED MIND CONTROL TO MAKE YOU CONFESS YOUR LOVE TO EVERY TROLL IN ALL EXISTENCE, INCLUDING THE EMPRESS
CA: kar wwhat the fuck.
CG: I AM NOT KARKAT. I AM VRISKA 8ITCH SERKET.
CG: YOU CAN TELL IT'S ME 8ECAUSE I'VE STARTED REPLACING MY B'S WITH THE NUMBER EIGHT 8ECAUSE EIGHT IS MY FAVORITE NUMBER. ::::)
CG: ALSO 8ECAUSE I'M THE LUCKIEST MOTHERFUCKER AROUND.
CA: holy shit kar
CA: im literally laughin
CA: an seahorse dad is just lookin at me like im fuckin crazy
CG: YOU ARE. BUT NO ONE'S CRAZIER THAN I BECAUSE FOR SOME REASON I THINK IT'S OKAY TO BE A BITCH TO EVERYTHING, INCLUDING NON LIVING THINGS.
CG: OKAY THAT'S ENOUGH OF THAT. I'M AFRAID IF I PRETEND TO BE HER FOR TOO LONG I'LL ACTUALLY TURN INTO HER.
CA: that wwas funny though.
CA: noww wwhen i ask her ill be thinkin a that cockamamie vvriska impersonation ya just did.
CA: thanks kar
CG: YEAH. DON'T FUCKING MENTION IT OR I'LL KICK YOUR ASS.
CA: uh huh sure ya will.

Karkat grinned and looked at the screen. He had forgotten how much fun it was to talk to Eridan and he wished he would've started talking to him daily much sooner, though he did feel bad that the only reason why he started talking to his royal blooded friend was to distract himself from the pain of "losing" Sollux.

It had been a few perigees since Sollux told Karkat about his new found red relationship with Aradia and since then, their conversations have been scarce. Even when the two did talk it always seemed fake. It felt as if they were just going through the motions. Karkat tried his best to act as if nothing was wrong and everything was just as it was before but he couldn't help it. Karkat was jealous and no matter how much Karkat acted, he couldn't hide that. Sollux of course didn't know, the cancer troll refused to every admit to his friend he was jealous of Aradia, Karkat only could hope that Sollux didn't really notice Karkat's weird responses whenever Aradia was brought up.

But Sollux did notice.

Sollux noticed a lot of things. He noticed when Karkat was online, Eridan was always online as well. He noticed that the two always signed off together. He noticed that whenever Aradia was brought up Karkat's replies would come later and in shorter responses. He noticed that their conversations seemed so....fake and boring. Sollux noticed this all and tried to figure out himself exactly what was going on. Sollux first assumed that this was like before when Gamzee went to Karkat's hive because he was dealing with something. That would explain why Karkat was rarely talking and his messages were short and choppy, but it didn't explain why the conversation would turn awkward when his matesprit is mentioned. Maybe Karkat was hurt? They always flirted and it was obvious that they had feelings for one another...perhaps Karkat was jealous? Sollux shook his head. No, Karkat wasn't that person....was he? No, Sollux was sure that Karkat wasn't the jealous type. This was most likely something Karkat was going through.

Maybe Gamzee knew.

It was like a light bulb appeared over the top of Sollux's head. He quickly clicked on Gamzee's username and began typing. Sadly, a good twenty minutes later Gamzee confirmed that there was nothing wrong with Karkat and that his best friend was fine. Sollux frowned and rubbed his temples. He was four sweeps old with the intelligence of a super computer. He was able to crack codes within minutes and create new codes crime scratch. He had visions two fold and could hear the cries of the dead in his thinkpan. He could do all these things yet he just couldn't figure out what was wrong with his friend. Or maybe he did figure it out but he was just blinding himself from the truth? It was possible.

Sollux decided to stop being such a wimp and to just confront Karkat over his unusual behaviour. Who knew, maybe Karkat would just talk for once instead of hiding behind his wall of anger and snark. The psionic cracked his knuckles and began typing out his message to his grey texted friend.

twinArmageddons[TA] began trolling carcinoGeneticist[CG]

TA: alriight karkat ii have no fuckiing clue what2 goiing on wiith you
TA: or maybe iit ii2nt you per 2e. maybe 2ome 2hiit ii2 goiing on at your hiive and you ju2t dont feel liike doiing anythiing but you kiind of feel liike you have two.
TA: my poiint ii2 that ii know 2omethiing2 up wiith you. we never fuckiing talk but when we do talk iit2 all awkward and boriing and fake a2 hell.
TA: ii want two know what2 wrong.
CG: NOTHING'S WRONG. I'VE JUST BEEN PREOCCUPIED.
CG: I HAVE A LIFE OUTSIDE OF OUR DAY TO DAY CONVERSATIONS SOLLUX. MY PATHETIC LIFE DOESN'T REVOLVE AROUND YOU.
TA: preoccupiied wiith what?
CG: IT'S COME TO MY ATTENTION THAT I'VE BEEN SPENDING WAY TOO MUCH FUCKING TIME TALK TO YOU AND NEGLECTING MY OTHER FRIENDS.
TA: 2o now youre neglectiing me and talkiing two your other friiend2.
TA: why not ju2t handle your tiime onliine better?
CG: OH I AM.
CG: I TALK TO EVERYONE ELSE NOW MORE THAN I HAVE BEFORE.
CG: HELL I EVEN TALKED TO THAT GRUB FUCKER EQUIUS. IT WAS A HORRIBLE CONVERSATION AND A HUGE WASTE OF MY PRECIOUS TIME BUT AT LEAST I TALKED TO HIM.
CG: BUT I HAVE BEEN TALKING TO ERIDAN A LOT. I HAVE TO ADMIT, HE ISN'T THAT BIG OF AN INSUFFERABLE PRICK ONCE YOU GET PAST HIS GINORMOUS EGO.
TA: he2 a blood ca2te loviing douche bag who2 only iintere2t ii2 murderiing all of u2 on land.
TA: he2 the biigge2t goddamn priick out there dude. what the hell could you two po22iibly talkiing about.
CG: HEY! THAT'S FUCKING PERSONAL YOU SACK OF SHIT.
TA: iim ju2t 2ayiing. who know2, maybe he ii2nt even your friiend maybe he2 ju2t talkiing two you 2o you can tru2t hiim enough two where he could get two your lu2u2.
CG: FUCK YOU. HE ISN'T DOING THAT.
TA: he could be. maybe he2 ju2t keepiing you around for laugh2. he2 ju2t talkiing two you ju2t 2o he can 2ee how pathetiic u2 "land dweller2" are.
CG: FUCK YOU SOLLUX. I DON'T NEED THIS SHIT FROM YOU. I WILL ADMIT ERIDAN IS FUCKING INSANE. HIS PLANS TO KILL OF LAND DWELLERS ARE MORONIC AND POINTLESS AND HIS LOVE FOR OUR FUCKED UP HIERARCHY IS DISGUSTING BUT HE WOULDN'T GO ON A RAMPAGE AND JUST DO THAT TO ME.
CG: YOU KNOW, IF I DIDN'T KNOW ANY BETTER, JUDGING FROM YOUR RAMPAGE I'D SAY YOU'RE JEALOUS.

Anger flared up deep inside of Sollux and his psionics crackled dangerously. He snarled at the screen and his fingers quickly pressed down on the letter keys.

TA: you know what. ii am fuckiing jealou2. iim jealou2 of eriidan goddamn ampora becau2e he 2tole my be2t fuckiing friiend from me. youre 2pendiing all your tiime wiith hiim. iit u2ed two be me that you 2pent all your tiime wiith. we would 2iit at our de2k2 for hour2 and talk two each other about 2tupiid 2hiit. youd 2end me your 2hiitty code2 and iid 2end you my obviiou2ly better one2. wed 2iit here and wed learn 2hiit about each other and wed talk and iit wa2 fuckiing amaziing. but for 2ome rea2on eridan 2tep2 iin and ha2 two ruiin my friiend2hip wiith you by takiing you away from me.
TA: ii bet you two talk 2hiit about everyone el2e liike you and ii diid. ii bet you two have 2pent goddamn hour2 talkiing two each other, learniing everythiing there ii2 two learn about each other. ii bet he know2 that your favoriite color ii2 fuckiing orange becau2e iit remiind2 you of the 2unrii2e that mate2priit2 u2ually kii22 iin front of in your romcom2? doe2 he fuckiing know that your favoriite moviie ii2 Where The Female Troll Lo2e2 Her Memeory IIn A Previiou2 Acciident And The Male Troll Who Play2 Red Rom Game2 Wiith Vii2iitiing Female Troll2 Fall2 Flu2hed For The Female Troll Wiith The Memory Problem2 And 2pend2 The Entiire Moviie Tryiing Two Make A Proper Red Relatiion2hiip Wiith Her Work Even IIf Her Lu2u2 2ay2 IIt'll Be IImpo22iible.
TA: doe2 he fuckiing know that the only rea2on why you fiir2t got iintwo romcom2 ii2 becau2e youre afraiid youll never fiill up any quadrant 2o you iimagiine your2elf iin the plot of the moviie.
TA: you know what, maybe ii am a biit jealou2. but can you really blame me?
CG: YEAH WELL MAYBE **I'M** JEALOUS TOO. MAYBE I'M JUST A BIT FUCKING JEALOUS OF ARADIA. YES SOLLUX, I'M JEALOUS OF ARADIA FUCKING MEGIDO. I'M JEALOUS THAT *SHE* STOLE *YOU* FROM *ME*. YES, I KNOW THAT IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY FUCKING SENSE. BUT YOU ENTERED A FUCKING QUADRANT WITH HER. THE FUCKING FLUSHED QUADRANT TOO! THAT JUST FEELS LIKE ONE BIG FUCK YOU TO ME YOU KNOW.
CG: YOU AND I HAVE BEEN CONSTANTLY FLIRTING WITH EACH OTHER FOR PERIGEES ON END AND I KNOW WE'VE NEVER OFFICIALLY ENTERED A QUADRANT AND THAT YOU CAN DO WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WANT BUT IT HURT SOLLUX.
CG: IT FUCKING HURT.
CG: WHEN YOU TOLD ME ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH ARADIA I FUCKING SOBBED MY EYES OUT. I DON'T KNOW WHY. I KNOW IT'S STUPID. I KNOW I HAD NO REASON TO BE UPSET BUT IT HURT. I WAS JUST SO FUCKING SCARED OF LOSING YOU. YOU WERE IN AN OFFICIAL QUADRANT WITH SOMEONE AND I FELT A LITTLE...I DON'T KNOW. POSSESSIVE? IF YOU'RE RED WITH HER THAN THAT MEANS WE CAN NO LONGER DO OUR HORRIBLE RED FLIRTING AND I JUST FELT LIKE SHE WAS TAKING SOME PART OF OUR FUCKED UP FRIENDSHIP AWAY. 
CG: I GUESS YOU COULD SAY I DIDN'T WANT TO SHARE YOU WITH ANYONE ELSE. I WANT YOU ALL TO MYSELF FOR SOME REASON.
CG: ERIDAN AND I JUST...STARTED TALKING THAT DAY YOU TOLD ME. HE EVEN CAME OVER TO MY FUCKING HIVE AND IT MADE ME FEEL A BILLION TIMES BETTER YOU KNOW? IT WAS LIKE HE WAS INDIRECTLY TELLING ME THAT I DIDN'T NEED YOU AND I NEED TO MOVE ON. BUT I COULDN'T. I KEPT TALKING TO HIM AND FOR SOME ODD REASON IT FELT LIKE TALKING TO YOU BUT WITHOUT THE GUILT OF KNOWING I HAD A SELFISH NEED TO KEEP YOU TO MYSELF. THEN WHEN I TALKED TO YOU I JUST COULDN'T BECAUSE I FELT SO GUILTY AND SO SAD AND I JUST COULDN'T.
TA: ...
CG: I'M SO SORRY I'M SO FUCKED UP AND SELFISH AND POSSESSIVE OKAY? I'M A FUCKING MESS AND IMMATURE AND I FUCKING SUCK IN QUADRANTS.
CG: I'M SORRY I HAVE THIS OVERWHELMING DESIRE TO JUST KEEP YOU ALL TO MYSELF.
CG: I'M SORRY FOR BEING A GIGANTIC FUCKING ASSHOLE AND NOT TALKING TO YOU AND SORT OF REPLACING YOU WITH AMPORA.
CG: I'M GOING TO GO WALLOW IN A PILE OF MY OWN SELF PITY AND PRAY THAT A DRONE BREAKS DOWN MY DOOR AND CULLS ME ON THE SPOT.
TA: karkat waiit!
CG: BYE SOLLUX.

carcinoGeneticist[CG] ceased being trolled by twinArmageddons[TA]