A/N Dear god, I had to write 4000 words before this was out due to a dodgy internet connection and a faulty word processor. But it's out, I guess. I'm posting this from my ipad so everything is probably wrong as I always do it from my laptop. Sorry in advance, enjoy.

Janitorial work was as exciting as it sounded. It wasn't as if Phil had been anticipating fun and games but the horrific sense of loneliness and boredom was already sinking in and he hadn't even passed the training stage.
Two days where he would be shown around the exhibits and another telling him what he would have to do if he had to fill in the roles of any of the feeding stations would make up his training. Then, it would be up to him to formulate his plan, which was still unfortunately vague.

Being on-the-job training, he was already gaining a sense of his surroundings and more specifically, the Neko unit. Overall, the layout was simple. With the glass cage at its centre, the metal building led off the right where it joined the other offices. The training rooms, though, diverged from the rest and in the corridor to the offices, there was another staircase leading to the underground training facilities. They had deemed it the safest place, despite its dingy demeanour and cracking walls. If anything, it only made it more menacing, working in their favour.

Phil did his best to clean it, even, hoping that that would make it any better. He assumed it didn't but it was a step in the right direction: step one in what was beginning to look like hundreds.

After his training, though, the descending mood seemed to entrap him. Dan, who he'd had little time to see, was still locked away and despite his best efforts- he still had no plan to get him out.

Nothing that wouldn't end with them both being locked away, at least.

Phil's dampened mood affected everything. Despite his comfort in his new position, the bosses were noticing his slacking as well as his lack of care for any other enclosure but the Neko exhibit.

He was lucky enough that the office worker had not yet mentioned their encounter about the Neko, something that could destroy this all in a moment. That was all any of it was, luck. There were a thousand things to do and a thousand things to go wrong with each of them.

So, Phil picked up his game. Over the next week, he focused and pushed anything Neko related from his mind. And, in that week, there was a moment where he felt normal. The everyday routine of life was comforting: waking up, going to work, going home, sleeping. A boring cycle that was so much better than the chaos he had endured.

In a life where everything was crumbling to pieces, a slither of peace was enough for Phil to nearly leave his mission behind.

He didn't let himself think of that again. Dan was the thing that pushed him in life. Dan was why he had given up his goddamn awful job and pushed away his friends that clearly didn't believe in him. Okay, maybe that last one was a lie. It wasn't Dan's fault, though.

His new job, however, was something that Phil was beginning to fit into nicely. He understood what he had to do and he did it. It was all so straightforward; there was no guessing, no planning, no scheming. He just did as he was told and sometimes if he had the initiative to do more, it was recognised and rewarded. The zoo were surprisingly nice employers and Phil found himself doing better for himself than he had in years. Maybe the pay was smaller but he was willing to sacrifice that for his mental state.

It sometimes did distract him as to why he was there.

That's why, when he was about a week into his job, he finally decided to make a change. His lunch break was about an hour long and he usually, after eating, had about forty-minutes to spare doing very little. So, he dedicated those times to Dan.

It wasn't that he hadn't been seeing Dan at all. Well, actually, it was. Ever since he had started the job, he had decided to stay away. If he was going to think straight and make a plan then it was for the best that he didn't see Dan.

Well, that had been the thought. It hadn't worked out as he had hoped.

So, on the first Monday back after a calm weekend, he went to see Dan in the first time in weeks. The enclosure was devoid of visitors, the crowd on Monday's mostly being in the afternoon when the school kids came in. There were one or two who quickly dispersed and Phil's scowl, sensing the trouble. Phil almost laughed, he had never been a scary person but after the last few weeks, he had certainly learned to intimidate people a bit. Or just embarrass himself enough that they wanted to run away. Thinking about it, it was probably the latter.

When Phil saw the enclosure, he let out a huge sigh of relief. Dan was in his human form, looking willing to talk. They still had troubles communicating but with so little people around, if Phil shouted- even if it was a little suspicious- Dan could hear. If he couldn't, Phil resorted to writing on his phone and showing Dan the screen and although Dan couldn't reply back that easily, his body language was enough. He almost wished they both knew sign language but both of them were clearly not in a state right now to learn.

'Hey.' Phil smiled, keeping his voice low for now. Simple words were easy enough to lip read, especially pleasantries. Dan resorted to waving back, looking Phil up and down suspiciously. Phil didn't think anything of it, he hadn't been here in a while and Dan, no doubt, was curious as to why he was there.

'How are you?' Dan shrugged, his eyes downcast. Then Phil realised what he had missed, why Dan would be so curious. How had he forgotten? How could he be so oblivious? The last time he had seen Dan had been when he was passed out. He had been so panicked. Yet, he had forgotten.

How?

The curse of happiness. It must have been. He had been so blinded by his plan that he hadn't had the time to think of Dan. All he could see the was the long-term consequences of his actions, not the short term. He was living in the future. He wasn't sure whether it was worse or better than living in the present.

It had been like a coma had overtaken him and now here he was, waking up from his amnesia, the happiness all collapsing on him to reveal the true state of everything underneath. And dear god was it awful.

Phil didn't know how he was supposed to make up for that. 'I'm sorry I didn't come sooner.' It was a start, at least. 'I was busy, with the new job and all.' Dan's ear pricked up and his eyes looked startled. Phil was off to a great start, wasn't he? He couldn't even remember to tell his best friend what he was doing to help him. No wonder Dan looked gaunt. His hope had probably been drained for days now. Phil had been his beacon, one that had disappeared at the flick of a switch.

'Oh, yeah, that.' Phil raised his voice to make sure Dan could hear. Surely no one could harm him for telling a Neko about his new job? Yes, it would look suspicious but Phil was sure that it wasn't enough to press charges. Because god knows that in the last few months he had been seeing more and more news articles about Neko hoarders. It was like they were taunting him personally, appearing for only him to see. A reminded. He ignored them, never told Dan about them and for the most part forgot about them. It didn't quell the deepening anxiety within him.

'I got a job here, at the zoo. I clean this exhibit.' Phil didn't feel like it worth mentioning that he did anything else. 'It's fun, not bad pay at all. And...' He paused, taking out his phone so no one else could overhear. He typed, 'I've got a plan.' Okay, that may not have been the entire truth but it was close enough. Phil was formulating a plan. And he was close, he was sure he was. He took his phone back, deleting the message and replacing it. He was also sure that the other Nekos were taking a peek. He didn't mind, they wouldn't tell a soul. If anything, he was their beacon of hope too.

He wished he wasn't. He didn't think he could bear that responsibility. He would, anyway. He was never good at turning people down. But, then again, when it came to Dan he seemed to become far stronger than before. Suddenly, his hand traced the scar on his stomach. It was a reminder now. One that, like the articles, he tended to ignore. It was still there. That wouldn't leave him.

'Are you okay?' Dan mouthed from within, his lips barely moving. He looked exhausted. Nevertheless, Phil understood him. Phil nodded, as much as he could, trying to look positive. He was their beacon, he had to remain strong. He wasn't the one in the cage.

'I'm okay.' He assured, nodding along with his words to make sure Dan understood. Dan still didn't seem convinced, though. Phil, deciding the mouthing his next words would do no good, brought out his phone and typed again- this one much longer.

'I won't be okay until you're out of here but I'll survive.' Phil shrugged as he pulled his phone away and Dan only sighed, scowling slightly. He looked a bit lost too; with no way to write, Dan was often at a struggle to say much. They were running out of time, Dan would have to shift soon, and suddenly Phil's legs were bouncing up and down nervously.

Dan mouthed his next words, slowly creating each letter until Phil understood. It was slow but better than nothing: 'you make it sound like I was stabbed, not you.' Phil almost laughed. It was true. Phil was protective and at some point, it had become as if Dan was the one that had spent days in hospital and not him.
After the whole...incident, both of them had been tortured. Phil found himself wanted to confront that man with the black hair again but he knew he wouldn't. He couldn't. He didn't have the nerve. For the hero of a story, Phil certainly wasn't very strong.

'I'm fine, Dan. I really am. It doesn't hurt much.' They hadn't talked much about it, avoiding the topic as if it were taboo. Maybe it was because it would just bring them both down. Dan nodded, looking down at Phil's stomach, trying to see through the thick fabric blocking his way. 'Don't worry about me. I'm here to worry about here. You shouldn't be here.' He mouthed the words and by this stage, he was certain that Dan wasn't the only one watching. He was sure of it. He could see it. 'None of you should be.' He added, giving them all a sad smile. He had taken that responsibility now, hadn't he? He knew, no matter what, he wouldn't be able to free them all. Only one. And that one was going to be Dan. But at least he could give them hope that they weren't alone and that some people were on their side. They at least deserved that.

'I'll be back soon, Dan. Always at this time,' he pointed to the clock, 'this is my lunch hour.' Dan nodded in understanding; Phil was still mouthing. 'I do have a plan; I'll get you out of here.' Dan nodded again and Phil could see it, the trust, the trust that Dan placed entirely on him.

It was mad to think that less than months before they hadn't even met. Dan had been on the streets, alone, starving. It felt like forever since Phil had taken him in. So much had happened, good and bad. In a story, the good bits always seemed to be left out. But Phil had been happy. With Dan, that was. Even when living in fear, they were happy. Happy because there was something between them that he couldn't explain. They were closer than any friends Phil had had before.

That was what best-friends were, he guessed.

And it felt nice.

It was also heartbreaking. This was heartbreaking. He would just have to focus on the good times. He would. To keep himself sane. To make a plan. Because if he forgot and let the coma of happiness take over again, they wouldn't get anywhere.

Phil was determined to win this fight. Because he never won. But he would, this time. Because this time he had something to fight for.

word count: 2163

published: 26.11.17