I decided to try a few new things and hopefully you will like them :3 (this involves Nade, Jordan, and Tom incase you were confused) I hope you like! Please leave comments, they are what I live for <3

~~~

His hands are soft. When he talks, there's always a glimmer in his eyes that betrays how content he is. Facial hair has always been hard for him to grow, but he takes pride in what he has, a little patch here and there. Brown eyes have never looked better on anyone else. His shirt is on backwards. The thumping of his foot against the floor is unusual.

As I watch him speak, he speaks too quickly. Something has changed since his last visit. My eyes won't focus on the colors bouncing across the screen for longer than a minute. He guides my hand to the right button after a while and blurts out a tease at my clumsy fingers, but his voice appears nervous and shaky.

Today was nothing special, but something has changed. I'm just not sure what.

When he leaves after the screen is off and our cramped fingers are resting, he doesn't want to. He lingers in the doorway and keeps his eyes set with a spot on the wall. It's quiet. The rain outside makes soft pitter patters on the ceiling. I open my mouth to speak, but the words on my tongue never leave.

His tongue silences them. Something did change. My chest throbs, slowly and painfully. It will never be the same now.

~

His absence puts my mind at a discomfort. The room is cold, the sofa is cold, my skin is cold. He made it warm, but lots of people do. Is he different? In what way? The clothes on my achingly chilled skin feel tight. Too tight. I go to my cold room to change them.

His warmth, my body missed dearly. My mind kept reminding the frozen joints that if that warmth were to return, we would have to make some changes. I would have to make some changes. Changes that my mind isn't sure it wants right now, or ever. An image of a familiar hand clasped around my own startled me. I hurried back to the cold kitchen to occupy wandering thoughts with chores. Later, I promised. Later.

The night passed slowly. My mind craved attention to the unresolved matter, but I simply pushed it away. With little reluctance, I slid on the navy coat and ignored the faint buzzes of calls coming from the phone stowed away, far away into the depths of a cold dresser. The door knob was welcoming.

Colors no longer existed. Not when happiness was no where to be seen. People smiled, birds sang, cars drove on, but nothing changed in the cold depths of myself. Driving causes overthinking. Music does well to block it out.

The cafe was warm, but not like him. Usual words of an all too familiar order were murmured and a pencil scraped softly against its purpose. Two fake smiles and a too happy greeting later, the forced politeness between two cold humans ended. The soles of my shoes walked towards an empty, welcoming part of the room and stopped when my body rested against the cushioning of a plushy chair. Before things changed, he came here too.

One mind focused on a phone. Two in a conversation. Another on a coffee. Three wound up in a shushed, heated argument. The bell dings and my eyes wander up to meet ones who'd accidentally glanced over mine. They didn't break gazes, neither of them. Maybe it wasn't an accident.

The pleads inside of my mind were not heard by the man walking towards me. When he sits down opposite of my own chair and asks me, kindly and with very caring eyes, what's wrong...I let silent tears down my cheeks. I'd always heard throughout my entire life that friendships never lasted forever. Hope is what made this happen. Silly hope that two best friends could forever remain just best friends, even if one loved the other.

Words tumbled from my lips at a speed I didn't even know was possible, some unintelligible, most followed by small sobs or hiccups. The man never broke focus, even when my focus was severed at times. Once or twice he would softly murmur encouragements to go on when I had to stop or when my sobs overtook my words. It worked, and for several more minutes I continued my answer. When I finished, he took a deep breath and began to speak.

This was not my fault, he explained. I did not choose for this to happen. Tom simply needed to express his feelings someway, and I am not obligated to return them. I need to tell him what I think and feel about what he did to me. The kiss made me feel uncomfortable. A relationship with Tom is not what I want. I want a friendship. There is nothing wrong with that. Tom will get over it eventually if he becomes upset. If he really cherishes me so much, he will come back. Things will be different for me and him, but we'll be okay. It isn't the end of the world or our friendship.

The tears, irritatingly, had not subsided. They still poured down my flushed cheeks, resembling the pouring rain outside. The man stood and slid into the seat beside me. He told me his name, Nade, and asked if it was okay if he were to hug me. My answer was to grab hold of his black hoodie and sob, uncontrollably into it. Had this been any other day, myself would've been mortified. Sobbing into a very cute man's hoodie in a public cafe was certainly embarrassing.

His arm around my waist was comforting as he walked me home. An umbrella from his own collection protected us from the downpour of the clouds tears, and I was so very thankful this stranger had decided to take pity on me.

He felt warm, like Tom.

Soft conversation was made under the umbrella. There were even a few laughs here and there. Both made the other feel better, more at ease.

When the soles of shoes scraping against wet concrete stopped and the familiar door mat came in view, the umbrella was closed, replaced by the roof over top. There was silence. He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out.

My tongue had silenced them.

~

The buzzing hardly ever stopped now. I'd begun to wonder if Tom had the buzzing phone's number on speed dial. There was an occasional knocking on the front door, but it remained closed, the rooms also remained stone cold. The sheets of the bed never shifted unless nature called, or the smell got to be too much. The silence never felt so lonely before.

On a day that the sheets hadn't moved yet, the bathroom door remained closed, the cabinets stayed untouched, there was a crash. The sound of wood smashing against tile was heard all throughout the house, even the bedroom. I curled my toes up and waited in dread for Tom to come.

When he did, there was nothing but yelling and questions. The human with the cold skin remained silent through it all, even when the warm one called him an inconsiderate asshole. The cold one did not stay quiet, however, when another warm skinned human began to speak too.

He asked if I was okay. Had I eaten anything today. Had I moved at all.

A whisper of a no by the cold one was used as an answer to every question. Both warm men went silent at the still mans answers. Then there were unintelligible whispers. Some footsteps sounded from the carpet. Two creaks and dips of the bed made the cold one question what was happening. It startled him when two sets of arms wrapped around his impossibly cold skin, making his frozen joints melt, his cheeks redden, his chapped lips open for a quiet gasp.

These two warm humans loved him. Even if he was cold, even if he was distant, even if he wasn't sure he loved them too.

They loved him.
~~~

This sucked but I really wanted to try this style of writing bc I love it so much. I couldn't really write in third person completely, so sorry if you're confused a little on the pov...I hope you enjoyed it anyway :3 leave a comment if u need some help understanding something and please be nice when giving criticism, I am a fragile being <3

I was gonna post a chapter of Living and Dying yesterday but then I looked over the next draft and it was COMPLETE crap and I refuse to publish trash >:P I'm gonna rewrite it and hopefully post a chapter of it this week :3 Have a good day beautifuls!

Goodbye!

- Lee