Chapter Twenty-One: The Four Bastards

SANCHEZ. That is who I am, who I have always been. I was not a Dela Vega, I never will be. I may be a Cromello, but in terms of the world's mandate, the one where people who were unaware of our plight reside and this one that's almost like an isolated bubble only for mafiosos, I am a Sanchez. It was not a name known to the Underground until I came. Well, at least until Uncle Kristoffer and Aunt Alexandra took me in after my father's death.

With all honesty, I never really had an inkling of how exactly a marriage should be. Despite not fully knowing my mother, I just knew my father's relationship with my stepmother was not what it was supposed to be. My father married a potential mother for his son, not a potential life partner for himself. The moment that dawned on me, the answer to my question became more distant as I do not see it as any different from employing a nanny for your child.

And when I thought I'd finally receive a decent answer, I just had to receive the worst possible one...

It was just a few days after we arrived at the Dela Vega Manor. Thanks to Alexander and Alexandria, the strange house, which consisted of strange statues, strange paintings, and strange people, somehow became bearable in a short time. My uncle made sure I would be raised alongside his children as if my blood and soul had always belonged to the lands where the only difference between its residents is their morals. 

It was a quiet autumn. Leaves painted of gold and bronze wither consistently as if they would spring up again from the very same branches they were born to and would fall from them the same way all over again. The wind would blow harder than it used to like a long-awaited messenger that would send off these leaves that seem to carry messages we mundanes could not see. We were supposed to take our history lesson at the old Señor Dela Vega's study, but we felt naughty and rebellious that we deliberately ignored how the time went past half three in the afternoon. 

We hid from the butlers' mustaches, and the associates' beards, and avoided the maids' keen stares. We played hide and seek, seeing the huge mansion as a challenge and the most fitting location for such a game. Alexander was it, and we gave Alexandria a head start of twenty seconds which she would gladly receive. Alexander and I would grin sheepishly as we agreed because Alex would always lose, and Alex never liked losing. I stayed for a while to see until she vanished by taking the stairs down and headed to the right wing, I suppose.

Nang oras na para ako naman ang magkubli, pinili kong tahakin ang umakyat sa susunod na palapag. I pretty much wandered as it was my first time stepping onto that floor. Ecstacy brimmed in me and manifested into a beam as it felt like the whole floor was mine to run onto. No one would scold me not run. No one would repetitively remind me of who I am. It was half an hour when boredom caught up to me, and I surrendered to the thought of sharing my new floor with my cousins. That was... until I heard voices down the opposite wing of where I was about to head to. 

Hindi ko kaagad nakilalang kina Uncle Kristoffer at Aunt Alexandra  ang mga 'yon. Kapwa mahinahon silang bumigkas sa tuwing nasa presensya namin sila. Kaya nang umabot sa pandinig ko ang salitan ng bulyawan at malulutong na mura, batid kong oras na para umatras at bumalik sa pinanggalingan ko. Ngunit nang papaliko na ang mga paa ko, isang katanungang inihiyaw ng tiyo ko ang awtomatikong nagtanim sa mga paa ko sa sahig.

"Anak ko ba si Alexander o bunga siya ng pagmamahalan ninyo ni Clyde na sa 'kin mo pinaako?!"

Mabilis na sinundan ng malakas na tunog ng sampal ang katanungan na siyang sa aki'y nagpapitlag.

"You... how dare you question the birth of your own son?!" Aunt Xandra bellowed, her voice staggering yet managed to keep all strength not to bow down to a vulgar accusation. "You are the one I married!"

"Yes, I am! Pero alam naman nating lahat kahit nina Herman na transaksyon lang ang relasyon na 'to! It is Clyde you always wanted, not me!" my uncle snarled at the top of his lungs. My tender young age at that time was no hindrance to tracing the bits of bitterness in every word he spouted.

Tila walang katapusang pinapalo na drum ang dibdib ko. Ni hindi ko alam kung tama bang nakikinig ako. Gayunpaman, hindi rin ako makaalis sa kinatatayuan ko. Pareho silang may tinutukoy na hindi pamilya na mga pangalan kung kaya't tila mga aktor sila sa entablado na nagbabatuhan ng mga linya. Iyon ang tinatak ko sa isip ko habang hindi napipigilan ng mga tenga ko ang makapakinig at hindi makagalaw ang aking mga binti.

"Ganoon ba kababa ang tingin mo sa 'kin para akalain 'yan?! Do you really think I would even name him after you if his real father is someone else?!"

My uncle's scoff had mixed in with a laughter so humorous that anyone could clearly know he was mocking his own wife. The supposed woman he worked hard to attain. 

"On the contrary, I looked up to you so much na paniniwalaan kong posible ang nasa isip ko. Your love can be too much. Every single one in the Mhorfell Academy how your love blossomed for that outcast, Clyde Vantress. Even that school that is full of lies witness the truth of the romance you had with him! Kung hindi ka lang naman pinilit ng papa mo, hindi mo ko pakakasalan! Kung hindi lang dahil kailangan natin magkaisang lahat, hindi ka papayag! Kung hindi pa si Clyde ang unang sumuko, susugal ka pa!"

"Matagal na ang lahat ng 'yon, Kristoff, for Pete's sake!" may bakas ng pagmamakaawa ang turan ni tiya. 

"And does that erase the possibility that he's not mine?"

You know, I never believed in ghosts. But back then, at that very moment, I wished it is a ghost I would see when I tried to glance at the room where those booming and gloomy voices were coming from. Nanginginig akong bumaling doon at walang dudang sa maliit na espasyo sa pagitan ng hindi nasaradong mga pinto ay ang tiyo at tiya kong nangako sa 'kin ng masayang pamilya sa pagdating ko.

"Alexander is your flesh and blood! Bakit ba napapraning ka na naman at binabalik mo ang nakaraan?!" Alexandra Dela Vega frustratingly argued, combing the golden threads in her head carelessly. "Bakit ba paulit-ulit mong pinagdududahan ang sarili mong anak?!"

"Are you saying na never ka nakipagsiping kay Clyde bago tayo ikasal, ha?"

Silence has never been any louder after that question. It's as if lightning has struck and perpetually separated a united land into two. And in this case, it might have really been. It split open a relationship with an irreversible curse. 

"See? Hindi ka makasagot. What are the chances na may nabuo kayong dalawa?" pagpapatuloy na akusa ni tito.

Imbes na mas tumaas ang tono o hindi kaya'y sumigaw, nanghihinang humagikgik ang tiya ko. Mula sa mahina hanggang sa pumarinig ito sa buong pasilyo. "At bakit? Anong gagawin mo kung hindi mo talaga siya anak?" nanghahamong turan nito. "Would you kill a child the way you orchestrated my father's death? And what? Claim it again that you did it because you love me kahit na ba para rin 'yon sa sarili mong kapakinabangan?"

"Wow..." my uncle gasped hoarsely and eventually bit his lower lip, leaving blood on its surface. "You know what... ba't pa ba natin papahabain 'to? We could just put that child for DNA testing, anyway."

"Hindi mo ba alam ang maaaring isipin ng mga kaalyansa natin kapag nalaman nilang pinagdududahan mo si Alexander?! Wala ka bang pakialam sa kinabukasan niya bilang susunod na pinuno ng pamilyang 'to?! So, don't you dare!"

"Oh, I would dare, Alexandra! Don't test me—"

What felt like an unending whipping of pain and agony ended when two warm palms touched my shoulder blades and turned me to their presence.

"You did not hear anything, Sky. You understand?"

Whenever I reminisce this memory, I always thought of how horrifying it is for Alexander to hear all those, if he happened to hear the extent of what I have heard. Bata man ako, hindi lingid sa 'kin ang pinapahiwatig ng tiyo ko. Ngunit paano naman siya na mas may edad sa 'kin? Hindi ba't parang kakaahon mo lamang sa tubig at itutulak ka muli sa pagkalunod ang pakiramdam na 'yon?

On the other side, somehow... I had hoped that it was Alexander whose palms I had felt.

But no.

It had to be Alexandria.

"Don't tell my brother you heard them fighting again, okay?" The usual glow on the princess of the family's face paled apparently. Not even the sunlight that would further emphasize her beauty could cover the fear in her trembling orbs. "Promise me, Kuya Sky."

'Again.' Tumatak sa utak ko ang isang katagang 'yan. Hindi iyon ang unang beses na nagtalo sina Tito Kris at Tita Xandra. At lalong hindi rin ito ang unang beses na pinagtalunan nila kung sino ang tunay na ama ni Alexander. Pero bakit? Papaano ba kung hindi talaga anak ni tito si Xander? Iyon ang mga tanong panay takbo sa kamuwang-muwang na isipan ko noon.

Although I would like to know more, hindi ko matiis ang namamawis nang noo at naluluha nang mga titig ng pinakababata kong pinsan. "Alright," turan ko sa kaniya bagamat namumutla pa rin sa mga napakinggan. "I think we should go back and take that lesson now..."

Alexandria nodded with her lips pursed. Habang nililisan namin ang pasilyo sa pinakamaingat na paghakbang, hindi nakatakas sa 'kin ang panginginig niya. She would occasionally rubbed her arms as if to console herself and then mumbling something like a chant.

"Kuya Xander is my real brother," she would repeat with her eyes never leaving the carpet we were walking on. "He's my kuya. Even if he isn't, that won't change."

Defending Alexander's birth was not something I could do. Branding her parents as liars would probably do more harm than unveiling the truth. Antagonizing her little chants would most likely be curses that'll grant her nightmares in all nights to come. And so, I did what I could barely do as a child, to a child that I thought had a better life, parents, and family than I ever could imagine.

"Hey, don't forget about me, okay?" Ipinagsumiksik ko ang mga daliri ko sa mga maliliit na pares ng kamay ni Alex at pinag-ekis ang mga ito. "I'm your kuya, too! Whether Xander is your brother or not, I will still be!"

Alex's long face lifted from the pull of the ground. When she finally shifted her attention to me, both ends of her lips rose like how a flower would stand gloriously when the sun is at its peak on its throne in the sky.

"Hmm!" She giggled, a few drops of tears escaping from the tips of her eyes. "Then, even if I'm not your sister, I would be!"

From there on, hindi tinanggal ni Alexandria ang pagkakalingkis ng mga kamay namin kahit hanggang sa matagpuan kami ni Alexander. As she gradually got the sunshine in her back, she'd swing our hands together in the air back and forth, hopping down the hall as if she never listened to a secret that could easily push her whole family to ruins.

Bahagya kong binalingan ang nakabuklat kong kanang kamay habang ang kabila'y nakapulupot na manibela ng sasakyan. Simula noon, nag-iba ang pananaw ko sa relasyon sa pagitan ng mag-asawa, ngunit lalo na sa tiyo ko na siyang katangi-tanging pamilya na kilala ko na may pakialam sa tunay kong ina.

From the day on, I would wonder if they did the DNA test. But I guess, it wouldn't have mattered. Dahil hindi nagtagal, isa-isang dinapuan ng trahedya ang sambahayang akala ko'y magiging masaya. Habangbuhay nang naburo sa kawalan ang eksenang kami lang ang nakaaalam ni Alex nang maaksidente siya. Natapos ang pagkabatang dapat na nararanasan pa ni Alexander at tuluyang natuldukan ang lahat nang pumanaw ang mag-asawa mula sa insidenteng 'nagkataon' daw.

"Pero walang nagkataon lang dito sa Underground..." bulong ko sa sarili at ipinahulog ang kanang kamay sa pendant na kipkip ng bulsa ng slacks ko. "None." Whatever my aunt is attempting to signify by leading me to this, I would not run away like before, especially now that I could bet my guts that 'that' event has something to do with what's happening now.

Marahas kong iniliko ang manibela at samu't saring mga mabubulaklak na salita ang bumalot sa sasakyan na ipinagkibit-balikat ko. Kung nag-aakala sila ng maala-karwaheng maneho, aba'y sana'y hindi na lang ako ang pinagdrive nila kung ganoon. Hmpf.

"Nasa dugo niyo bang magpipinsan ang maging kaskasero sa daan?!" bulyaw ni Dash sa tabi ko na pawang nakadakma na sa lahat ng posibleng makapitan.

"Listen, passenger princess," I winced as I continued to thread the roads on the map he himself had drawn. "My cousin, the sleeping princess, is in the hospital. Sean, the damsel in distress, is yet to be found. Spade, the oblivious darling, is perhaps on his way to making baby number 4. Now, all this shit is happening in real-time, but none of them is aware of what's happening to each other. And if they do, everything is going to pop, okay?"

"Master, anong konek nito sa pagmamaneho mo?!" the reaper shut his eyes closed firmly. "Geez, hindi yata ako sa labanan mamamatay."

"Noon pa man, walang permiso si Sky magmaneho kahit sa loob ng Mhorfell. Magtataka ka pa ba ngayon?" singit ni Marc sa likod ng sasakyan na kahit na ba kalmado ang boses ay nakakapit sa seatbelt na naka-strap sa kaniya.

"Sssh, quiet!" I told him, throwing him a side-eye over the rearview mirror. Inirapan ako nito at pumailing-iling na lang bago hanapin din ng makakapitan ang mga binti niya.

"I am supposed to be making babies now, too, if you didn't kidnap me from my Rennei..." nagmumukmok na bulong pa nito bago ko binalikan ng atensyon si Dash na mabigat na ang paghinga.

"As I was saying, we have to fix the problem before it gets out of hand or at least, mitigate the risks." Matapos kong ibigay ang punto ko ay mabilis kong tinapakan ang break at sabay ang dalawa na halos tumalsik paabante.

"Alright, we're here now," I informed them with a sigh. Napa-dramatic talaga ng dalawang 'to. Pareho pang nakahawak sa mga dibdib nila. Akala mo naman iiwan sila ng kaluluwa nila sa pagmamaneho ko. Ito kaya ang standard Cromello way, tsk. "Get the emo princess from that cabin."

They glared at me for one good minute as they try to compose themselves back, but eventually, they took off their seatbelts and went out of the car. Parang mga marites pa nga silang nagbubulungan sa paglalakad papunta sa maliit na cabin na 'di umano'y pinaglalagian daw ng isa pang tao na isasama namin sa alis namin.

Yep, no. Hindi ito gala. This trip is not for leisure but I think you can call it a trip to 'seek ourselves and for healing' dahil kapag hindi kami nagtagumpay, we might as well be damned.

Hindi nagtagal, matapos ang malinaw at malalakas na pagpapalag, matinis na tunog ng mga kaldero't nabiyak na kahoy mula sa 'di kalayuan na cabin, muling nasilayan ng araw ang dalawa. The only difference is, they got company.

Dash wiped off a bit of blood on his lips, while Marc's frown is evident as the ripped sleeve of his shirt. Sa kaliwang balikat ng nahuli ay ang taong kailangan namin. Nagpupumiglas pa 'to na parang bulati pero ako na lang din ang naawa sa kaniya kasi wala na siyang ibang kapupuntahan maliban sa alis na 'to.

This trip basically consists of the four bitches except it's their husbands that are in it. At since hindi namin masasama si Alex, ang kambal na lang niya ang isasama namin.

"Load that cargo--- este my cousin at the back. That thing is definitely not fragile. Handle him as you see fit. We have a long road ahead, fellas," I instructed them at pagkasaradong-pagkasarado nina Dash at Marc ng pinto ay pinaharurot ko na muli ang sasakyan.

As I navigate to pull the car out of the narrow road, the last thing I heard from Marc bago siya kumapit kay Axel bilang suporta ay 'fucking Cromello blood.'

It's weird, but even if it's a curse, I'm proud. I'll take that as a compliment.

Yep, I'm a Cromello, baby.