As Zak attempted to fix the broken zipper of the black jacket Darryl was wearing, he could hear the keys of Harvey's laptop being rhythmically and loudly pressed from the opposite side of the room.

"If you two don't move, you'll end up being late!" the blonde boy scolded, a severe glare following his warning.

The two Sophomores, Harvey sitting on his knees while Mega sat right beside him with crossed legs, shoot him an amused glance from behind the computer on the small table.

A frustrated groan escaped Zak's mouth as the zipper refused to get back in its place, and overhearing the conversation, he scoffed.

"Psh, how unusual! These two idiots are always late."

«I'm not even gonna try denying the truth.» Mega shrugged, getting pushed friendly by Harvey who got actually offended by Zak's observation.

"Well, at least try not to get there too late, I don't want you two to get in trouble." Darryl pleaded with a small but concerned smile.

In reply, the Asian boy gave him thumbs up, while the other shrugged once again, unbothered.

"Hanya! Finally, I fixed it!" Zak exclaimed triumphantly, finally able to zip close Darryl's jacket.

"Oh! Thank you so much, Zak." the taller thanked, smiling lovingly. He fixed his messy raven hair, and a genuine smile grew on his lips as he stared into his emerald eyes.

Obviously, a robotic voice letting out an «Ew.», had to ruin the moment.

"Mega!" Harvey protested, pushing him once again.

"Psh, idiot. He's just jealous." the Junior teased, grinning as he glared at the mute boy.

"Oh my goodness... Well, time to go!" the older boy blurted out, carefully pushing Zak towards the front door.

"Yeah, we better go. See you at school, bye!" the raven-haired boy greeted, waving at them.

Returning the wave, Harvey chirped a "Bye!", while Mega simply nodded.

After closing the door behind himself, Zak jumped off the stairs, siding Darryl with a wide smile plastered on his face.

Without thinking twice, the shorter boy instinctively reached for his hand, grabbing it with a delicate squeeze.

Trying his best to ignore the apprehensive voices onto his head insisting on how abnormal and embarrassing holding Zak's hand in public would be, Darryl softly tangled his finger with his.

"Harvey told me you stayed up all night..." the blonde boy begun, shooting at Zak a concerned glimpse. "Did you get some sleep?"

"Honestly? Not really." he admitted with a shrug, "But it's okay, I'm fine! Also, I'm glad you slept, your insomnia is improving so much!" a big smile grew on his lips as their glances met.

"I guess..." the other replied, not wanting to bring up the real reason why he got able to get sleep, which was the absence of rest during the duration where he isolated himself.

"I'm glad you're feeling, at least, a little better," Zak added, his eyes sheepishly darting from the cemented ground to the boy with flushed cheeks.

A loving yet insecure smile grew on Darryl's lips as he softly squeezed the shorter boy's hand, not daring to exchange the glance. Zak didn't mind, though, and simply smiled to himself as his eyes trailed back on the ground.

Filling his lungs with the freezing morning air before opening his mouth, Darryl sighed.

"Do you want me to come with you?"

"Mh?" Zak hummed, missing the context of his question.

"To the principal's office."

"Jesus Christ..." he scoffed, rubbing his heavy eyelids with the thumb and index finger of his free hand. "Believe it or not, I actually somehow forgot about that."

A forced smile grew on Zak's lips as he attempted to put the spiraling bad thoughts silent. He felt Darryl's concerned glance searching for his chocolate eyes, but he refused to exchange the glance.

"Yes, I'd appreciate it." he finally replied, breaking the apprehensive silence that towered over the two moments before.

"Alright," the other murmured with a happy smile plastered on his face.

Darryl softly clenched his hand on Zak's, who shot him a sweet and thankful smile.

"Did you have fun with Harv and Mega, last night?" the boy in blue suddenly questioned.

"Mh... Yeah. I was kind of anxious, but I'm happy I accepted to come, it was worth it." the blonde boy replied, pulling Zak a little closer. "I'm glad you got close with them, I can see how much they care for you."

The Junior smiled even wider at his observation and started swinging his arm back and forth, adjusting his grip on Darryl's hand before doing so.

"Me too!" Zak exclaimed, then suddenly stopped his arm along with an expression change. "Harv's parents will be back today, doe. I don't know when we'll be able to do another sleepover..." he whined, pouty.

"Awe, we'll figure it out, I promise!" Darryl reassured and his eyes widened right after as an idea came to mind. "Oh! Maybe they could come over instead."

Shooting him a confused glance, the Junior frowned at his proposal, "Isn't that against the rules?" he wondered.

"Well,-" the other attempted to explain, but Zak didn't give him enough time.

"Weren't you the one obsessed over school rules?"

"And weren't you the one who didn't care to the slightest about them?" Darryl retorted, gifting him a knowing glance.

"Psh, shut up."

Without letting go of his hand, Zak gently pushed the taller boy away and pulled him back closer right after, causing a soft crash between their shoulders. He quickly tiptoed, reaching Darryl's flushed face's height to leave a small kiss on his pinkish cheek.

It was impossible to not notice the sprinkles brightening up Darryl's forest eyes whenever Zak would do anything of that sort, however, the boy in blue was the first one who didn't.

"I mean, we could, it'd be fun. Oh!" the short boy suddenly exclaimed. "One of these nights I wanna bring you to my special place! You showed me yours, it's my turn, now!"

"You have a special place?!" Darryl rhetorically questioned, smiling excitedly. "I can't wait to see it!"

"Now that I think about it, I haven't been there in so long!" Zak confessed, emphasizing the last part of the sentence by elongating the vowels.

"Where is it? How is it? Is it far?" the taller immediately started asking away.

"You'll see, you'll see," he replied, all smug.

"Oh, c'mon! Gimme a hint, you muffin! Pretty please?" Darryl begged with puppy eyes.

Shooting an amused glance to him, Zak snickered at his pressures, "No way I'm telling you, dude!"

"Awe, darn it." he mumbled, pouty.

The shorter scoffed at his childish reaction, and unable to hold the fake pout, Darryl started giggling with him.

As soon as the two got closer to their destination, the Senior got silent and uneasy, and it was impossible not to notice.

His tone was tense, and he would reply to Zak's questions with one-worded answers. And, on top of that, he let go of his hand with a sudden motion of his arm.

It was obvious what the reason of Darryl's malaise was.

The shorter tried his best to resist at the already unmanageable need to shoot a worried glance at Darryl, and ended up giving in.

Seeing him so tense immediately became unbearable for Zak, and forcing himself not to let him see his concern through his calm expression, he spoke up.

"Hey," he started with an unexpected chocked and squeaky voice. "it's gonna be okay. I promise."

Zak felt his guts twisting as a wave of guilt hit him at the sight of Darryl simply nodding at his reassuring words, while his blank but tense expression remained plastered on his face unbothered.

Coming back to school after everything that happened in the past days was stressful and terrifying for both of them, however, Zak knew he caused that situation himself and dragged Darryl along without wanting to.

On top of that, not only he caused a lot of avoidable consequences for both of them, but he also brought on the surface Darryl's past and sexuality, exposing him in front of everyone's eyes.

Zak agreed with him the night of their reunion about not asking anybody about what took place two years before, and to just wait once he was ready to talk about it himself.

Deep down, the Junior was dying to know and especially, he wanted to understand what happened between Darryl and Clay.

Since that night of Jacob's party, Zak didn't really have the courage to text Dream. He was sure he couldn't resist asking directly his explanations of what happened.

Disrespecting Darryl's privacy and, on top of that, breaking the promise the two agreed upon, was the last thing he wanted.

Zak almost lost the person he loved with all his heart and soul, he wasn't going to take the risk again.

He inhaled sharply, feeling the air getting thicker, then, without looking away from the floor, he murmured, "Do you still want to walk me to the principal's?"

"Of course I want to." Darryl immediately replied.

The absence of hesitation in his answer somehow managed to calm Zak down, but not for long.

"We're here..." the Junior anxiously murmured as they both walked past the open front doors of the school.

In less than a moment, everyone's eyes were on them, studying them head to foot.

Zak could perceive how tense Darryl was by just being beside him. But for him, he was oddly used to have eyes on him, whether it's for a positive motive or negative one.

But this time was different.
Other's student expressions were illegible, it was impossible to guess understand which side they were.
And that terrified both of them.

Without daring to say a single word, the two boys walked down the hallways, continuously hearing incomprehensible whisperings and murmurs most likely discussing them.

Zak mentally begged not to meet Vincent or Dave, and little did he know, Darryl was hoping for the same.

Running onto them would be way more than simply catastrophic. Darryl's, but specifically Zak's, the situation was extremely delicate for a fight between the two jocks.

As the two boys approached the principal's office, the Junior tension got worse to a point where the simple task of breathing was a struggle.

Obviously, he wasn't going to let everyone notice that, so he hid behind the cocky mask of himself.

But as soon as they found themselves in front of the door of the office, Zak didn't resist much and quickly hugged Darryl after turning on himself.

"Hey, it's gonna be okay, my little muffin." Darryl softly spoke, caressing his back and combing his hair with the other hand. "I love you, okay?"

The boy in blue nodded in his chest, tightening the hug a little more before letting go.

"When you're out, text me and I'll come right away, yeah?"

Zak nodded anxiously, and without daring to look up at Darryl, he mumbled a "Yeah...".

"I'm sure it'll be okay." the Senior reassured, his fingers tenderly combing the raven hair that covered Zak's chocolate eyes.

"I really hope it will." the bell ringing muffled his mumbling. "Alright, I guess it's time for me to go in."

"You got this, my lil muffin," Darryl reassured, showing off a small but genuinely encouraging smile.

And on Zak's lips, a small thankful smirk grew, and after taking a deep breath, he finally found the courage to knock at the door.

The uncomfortably familiar hoarse voice of the middle-aged principal came soon afterward, inviting the boy inside the office.

"Darryl?" Zak called after another shaky deep breath, "I love you too."

Receiving a loving smile and a reassuring nod from the blonde boy, the Junior finally grabbed the handle and made his entrance into the room, closing the door behind him.

"Oh, Carder." the woman sitting behind her desk spat, raising an eyebrow. "You have some nerve to just come without notice after all you've done in the past days."

Zak contained himself by avoiding frowning at her observation, and simply muttered a, "Good morning to you too."

"Noveschosch was you, wasn't he?" she questioned as her fingers tangled together.

There was no way he was going to tell her, so he simply stood there completely silent as he fidgeted with the hem of his hoodie.

But, either way, Zak felt proud of himself for being able to hold her gaze.

"Right, Carder?" her voice marked on his last name, and her eyes narrowed on him.

"Why would I-" he quickly stopped himself, realizing he wasn't in the right position to even try to talk back to the woman who had his future in her hands. He inhaled sharply, then breathed a, "Yes, he was."

The principal scoffed, clearly expecting the reply Zak provided.

"Sit down, Carder."

With hesitation, he fulfilled her request took a seat on the armchair in front of the desk.

He could see it in her eyes.
The same eyes of a predator who knows he has his prey trapped, and ready to maul it.

"Let's have a small chat, shall we?"

It was an oddly disheartening and unusual day for Harvey, and he found himself quite lost in those unexpected events.

Mega acted off the whole morning, and after walking to school alone without any notice, he managed to avoid his classmate with little to no effort.

On top of that, he kept leaving Harvey on read, ignoring his concerned messages.

To make matters worse, the Sophomore ended up spending lunch break searching for both Mega and Zak, since from what Darryl reported, he disappeared after talking with the Principal.

A frustrated groan escaped Harvey's mouth as the bell rang, announcing the end of the break.

He took his phone out of his cuffed jeans' pocket, and without stopping his walk, he let his fingers quickly dance on the keyboard.

yo darryl, i didnt find em
wbu? got news? >

Nope :( But it's okay!!
now get back to class
and stay out of trouble
< please >.>

we'll figure this out! im
sure both of em are fine >

ttyl, stay safe >

< you too :3

Sliding the device back onto the pocket, Harvey walked onto class muttering an excuse for the delay.

His eyes couldn't help but immediately search for Mega, darting from seat to seat despite the fact he would never change his spot. As expected, there was no trace of him.

'He's late. I'm sure he is. I just have to...' he let the strap of his backpack slide off his shoulder, then sat at his desk. 'Sit down and wait for him.'

Despite the obvious probability of Mega not arriving that evening, Harvey desperately grasped the hope of him coming either way.

It was oddly uncomfortable for him to stay without Mega, and at that point, he couldn't stop thinking about it.

Harvey didn't feel alone, that day. He felt abandoned.
He felt as if someone suddenly took everyone he loved and needed, leaving him alone with his overwhelming thoughts.

He was the type of person who always tried his best to stay positive and bring happiness to everyone.

But he didn't realize how empty he was without his friends.

"Harvey?"

The boy jolted at the unexpected call from the teacher and quickly shoot him a confused glance.

"What's the answer?" she questioned, raising an eyebrow.

His eyes darted on the other classmates' desks, noticing they had their book open, while he was still sitting there closed.

Swallowing anxiously, he looked back at the teacher with a clueless frown.

"Pay more attention, please."

Harvey attempted to excuse himself, but his words got stuck in his throat.

With a sigh, the woman closed her book, "Alright, you've got twenty minutes to complete page one hundred three."

The class filled up with the Sophomores' murmurs as nothing happened. Harvey was known for his inattention in class, but his ability to get awesome grades either way.

Somehow, that day he felt bothered for being scolded.

Shaking his head, he swiftly glanced at Mega's empty spot once again, then opened his book with a sigh.

That class was the only one where the two weren't sitting next to each other, since the teacher didn't allow changes. But even if Mega had to sit next to him, Harvey would check every second anyhow.

Time passed painfully slow, and the Asian boy couldn't bear with that anymore. He got up and walked to the teacher's desk, catching his attention with a rhythmic knock on the table.

"Sorry, I'm really feeling sick... May I go to the infirmary, please?" he pleaded.

The woman raised an eyebrow, "We already talked about this, Harvey. You're missing way too many classes and your attention in class decreased considerably, lately."

He clenched his teeth, "It's an emergency, please."

She silently stared at him, contemplating whether to let him go or not.

"I'm begging." he pleaded, lightly clapping his hand together in a sign of prayer.

With a sharp and long sigh, the woman fixed her glasses by bringing them back on the bridge of her nose.

"Fine, you can go." she allowed. "But, please, try and turn it in your homework and projects in time."

"I will, thank you so much." Harvey thanked with a big and wide grin plastered on his face.

He quickly walked back to his desk and collected his thing, then put his backpack on his shoulder and walked out of the classroom mumbling a greeting.

As soon as he walked past the school entrance, he started running in Mega's apartment direction.

Mega's home was the last place Harvey didn't and couldn't check, and he was sure his friend was there.

After running up three flights of stairs, the Sophomore finally managed to reach the apartment.

Fixing his jacket, he knocked rhythmically against the door. As expected, no answer came.

His knuckles hit the wooded surface once again, this time mildly harder than the first attempt.

Finally, the door opened with a rough gesture, Mega appearing on the other side. As soon as his eyes met Harvey's, he immediately chanced to close it, but the Asian boy predicted it, and blocked it with his shoe.

The mute boy gifted him a deathly glare before groaning and swinging the door open.

Somewhat reassured, Harvey walked in with a self-pleased grin while, after slamming the door closed, Mega walked past him and slapped a sticky note on his arm.

"Auh!" the other complained, grabbing the piece of paper as he glared at the smaller boy that walked onto another room.

He attempted to read Mega's terrible penmanship, taking a second to understand that «y tf are u here.» was what was written on it.

"What?! Are you seriously even asking?" he frowned, walking in the room his friend disappeared in moments before.

Mega unplugged his phone from the charger and stood up, glaring at Harvey once again.

«Look, I'm fine. I just need some time alone, okay? That's it. Now, go away.» his phone read as he frowned at him uneasily.

Too bad Harvey wasn't taking any of it and simply crossed his arms above his chest as they stared into each other's eyes.

Huffing, Mega's digits tapped on the screen again.

«I exposed myself way too much, lately. Especially with you. This is making me feel extremely anxious and... vulnerable. And the fact you or Zak keep pressing on me being alone a little too often makes me so... Angry.»

"What?! We're just concerned about you, Mega." Harvey rebutted, untangling his arms and then letting them fall against his sides.

«Well, I don't like depending on people, okay? 'Cause sooner or later, they leave. Zak will leave, you will leave. It happens all the time to everyone. At the end of the day all you just have yourself, and that has to be enough.» he retorted, narrowing his eyes.

"What-"

«Now that you got your shitty explanation, leave.»

"Mega, please." the other begged, not wanting to give up.

«No, leave me alone! This whole ass thing of "open up and you'll feel better" just doesn't work on me, okay? That's it. And you wanna know the truth» he didn't wait for a response, of course. «I was feeling way better before bringing my useless feelings up. That's it. And I am fine, stop worrying about me.»

"Don't even try, it's obvious you're not okay!" Harvey rebutted, genuinely concerned about his best friend's health.

«I just got overwhelmed, I guess. I shouldn't have been there with you and Zak, last night.» the mute boy dared to state.

Confused by his statement, Harvey's frown grew, and a groan escaped Mega's mouth as he regretted bringing those events up.

"What do you mean?" the older pressured.

«I mean that... The whole stupid discussion about the future and having a purpose in life, fucked me up, okay? Just the thought of not knowing what the fuck is going to happen in one year, or tomorrow, or even in an hour, just makes me so fucking anxious.» he admitted. He shoot Harvey a tired glance. «This, is the last time I'm ever gonna speak up about my feelings and thoughts, and that's that.»

Harvey attempted to argue, but Mega slammed his phone on the table and crossed his arms, refusing to communicate.

"Bruh." he scoffed at his behavior, then gave up and murmured, "Aight, I'm not gonna force you. I just want you to be comfortable."

A small thankful smile grew behind Mega's balaclava, then grabbed his phone from the table and quickly typed something.

«Are we gonna end this here or what? I'd rather do other things.» he spat, still somewhat salty about what just happened.

"Yeah, of course. Also, there's no way I'm gonna get back to school," Harvey smirked anxiously as he scratched the back of his head. "can I stay over, please?"

«I mean, my mother is gonna get back around four, so yeah, you can. Also, I'd need help with the same coding problem I've had this morning, would you help me?»

"Of course, you dumbo." the other happily accepted as he followed Mega in his room. "You've read my message about Zak, doe, didn't you?"

«Yes, I did. He's surely fine, it's not the first time he does this, after all.» he quickly shrugged it off, then he pointed at the device sitting on the bed. «The laptop is there. I'm gonna grab some snack, you can check in the meanwhile.»

Out of the blue, something came up to Harvey's mind as he sat down on the mattress.

"Oh, Mega!" he quickly called, stopping the boy before he could step out of the room, "I'm still waiting for you to teach me sign language, by the way."

Rolling his eyes, the other glared at him with and scoffed, «Your small brain couldn't handle such knowledge.»

"What?!" Harvey asked in disbelief.

«They call me "Mega" for a reason» the mute boy continued, tapping his finger twice against his temple as a grin of pure satisfaction grew on his hidden lips.

"The only reason people call you like that is because you're a mega noob!" Harvey rebutted, sticking his tongue out.

The other gifted him two middle fingers as he walked outside the room, and Harvey couldn't help but smile at his friend. He loved the closeness between them with all his heart, and he felt like he wouldn't be able to stay without him.

Sighing happily, he carefully grabbed the laptop and placed it on his legs.
That device was probably the most valuable object in the entire apartment, and Harvey knew how much Mega treasured it, in fact, he was the only one allowed to even touch it.

The Asian boy started to go through the codes on the screen, checking for mistakes.

A notification on the lower corner of the display caught his attention, and unable to resist the temptation, his eyes immediately landed on it.

It was a message from Telegram, the content was hidden, but not the sender.

His heart dropped at the sight of the contact's name.

It was from Vincent.

[unedited; 4300 words.]
for those who asked, this
book will have more than
a total of fifteen chapters
in total.

i wanna thank everyone
who is patiently sticking
and didn't give up on me. i
really appreciate every
single one of you.

despite the latest chapters
flopping really badly, i wont
stop writing. i wanna adress
on thing, doe. you can skip
but id appreciate if ud read.

i feel like a lot of ppl reading
this book dont realize im not
writing "for fun" or stuff like
that. im actually putting my
whole ass heart, soul and life
experiences into this story.
all i wanna do is open my readers
eyes, make them realize things,
make them FEEL things thru my
writing. i want Metanoia to be a
masterpiece that even once u r
done reading, will always stay in
the reader's heart. i want it to
hit them, and make them look,
feel and think differently.

i get it, the first chapters are a
mess, full of plot miscalculations,
grammatical mistakes and various
errors of other kinds; ive been
attempting to fix them, but ive
been stuck in this lkmbo where: or
i dont have time, or i get too anxious
and self conscious about how
bad it is. i promise i will fix it.

ive never, ever in my life been ambitious, not a single bit.
until now. and i fucking know
i want too much, but its
literally all im living for.

sorry for the
rant/vent.
I love u all.
<3