- Why don't you tell me what you feel ?

- I don't have any fucking feeling ! I don't ... feel anything. I. Am. Dead. Aokay ? I'm already dead. I feel like a dead forced to live, again and again. I am dead. This ... This isn't me. I don't even exist anymore. I'm a fucking robot, I'm a machine, but this isn't me.

Actually, I don't know what you're thinking about me. If I'm your friend, or the girl who can help at school, or even the one just here to take care of your friend. I don't know, but you hurt me. All these words break me. Broke me.

Life broke me, and now I'm dead. And you're asking me why I feel bad, you tell me I have friends, family, money, hapiness ? But I don't ! I don't have real friends always next to me, like you. I don't have a happy family, or a lover, like you. I don't have the money that I need, like you.

'Cause I'm not you And I'll never be. Boys don't look at me like girls look at you. Everybody loves you. And your friends. I have to be the one who helps you, who is always happy to be cool. Be as perfect as you. Be okay. But I can't.

And I'm fucking jealous. Of your lifes, of everything. Of the attention she has. Of the beauty you have. Of the hapiness that you show. And I'm fucking pathetic. Because I hope to be better, but I continue to be with you. And I have to leave everything to be okay.

- I'm here for you, you know ... I'm your friend, please take care of you.

I smile, with sadness.

- I'll be okay ... You'll be okay too, but I'll be okay. I won't suffer. I promise.

I put my phone off and close my eyes. Definitely.