CHAPTER FIVE / VOL. I, SHE HOPES I'M CURSED FOREVER

LOVE IS CONDITIONAL. Will knows this to be true because her father has taught her the way of the world—that love will come and go as mercurial as the weather, dependent on what you have to offer and whether or not you're worthy of their time. Love is too fickle to mean anything. It will never last. Will has always seen it this way—at least since she'd been alone for so long—any unconditional love from her mother goes forgotten and all that's left is rot. But while she's never thought of love as something lasting, she knows that her love for Luke won't fade, even when she wants it to—even on the nights where she swallows her pride and prays to the gods for her pain to dissolve. She doesn't even think about how Ares would scorn her for her weakness. He will never know loss; she knows this much.

So she understands now that love is not conditional—it is painful. It can last forever and tear you apart because surely there is something you could have done to save it, to save him. Will doesn't think she's loved anyone except for her mother, except for Luke. He was nothing if not good, and regardless of his shortcomings, he was her friend.

The conversation from earlier still weighs heavy on her mind and she has to fight the urge to carve into flesh, or burn cities, or do anything to destroy the last good things in the world. She wonders how anyone could see good in her.

The lingering thoughts of the conversation and memories that come as a consequence stir something within Will's subconscious. Behind her, Jason eyes her sleeping face that looks far too gentle and soft for a warrior. She'd fallen asleep not long after their conversation, eventually finding herself with her back pressed against his chest, unknowingly being lulled by the sound of his beating heart. He tries not to move too much in fear of waking her. It's a mixture of him wanting her to rest and not wanting her to decapitate him for getting too close to her, despite the fact that her body is slumped over his. It's not like it matters. She would still tear into him like a wolf through flesh.

Piper and Leo had since woken up and listened to Jason's half-baked plan that Annabeth would call an objective rather than an actual plan, critiquing it for its lack of attention to detail and preparation for all possible contingencies. If she were awake, Will would have reiterated this exactly just to see their faces fall flat with disappointment. But Will is not awake—thank the gods—and Jason is relieved that she won't scrutinize his plan that he knows is lacking. Now he takes the time to look at Will without her stoney eyes burning holes into his head. She's a lot less hostile when she's sleeping, more human in a sense, but still just as angry and wrathful. She mutters something in Greek that Jason doesn't understand but the way she says it suggests there is spite behind it. He finds it endearing.

Piper looks away from the sight. She can't stomach it for reasons that are unknown to her. "We're here," she says, shaking Will awake but not looking at Jason who looks at her with confusion. Her bitterness is poorly masked.

"Tell me that's Quebec and not Santa's workshop," Leo says, looking out at the city below them.

Will peels her eyes open groggily, rubbing at her eyes with calloused fingers. The dream she had still lingers in her mind, memories being stirred up by too many prying questions and unwanted thoughts. Sitting up, it occurs to her how strange it was that she would be leaning back in the first place. The warmth leaves as she glances behind her at Jason whose ears turn pink as he sends her a smile that's meant to appease her though it only makes her scoot closer to Piper, turning away from the boy who frowns in disappointment.

          "Uh, yeah, Quebec City," Piper confirms, distractedly, feeling an unnatural heat radiating from Will. "One of the oldest cities in North America. Founded around sixteen hundred or so?"

          Leo looks at her in surprise. "Your dad do a movie about that too?"

          Piper glares at him. "I read sometimes, okay? Just because Aphrodite claimed me, doesn't mean that I can't be well read. I'm not going to hide my intelligence because it doesn't sit well with others."

          In an uncharacteristic show of sternness, Leo straightens. "I know that. I do."

          "Do you feel that way because of your mom?" Jason asks. "Because she's the goddess of love and beauty?"

Will didn't know why they were bothering with these questions. It was obvious to her, as she watched Piper struggle to form a response. She could see Piper for what she was beneath the mask. Growing up Piper struggled with embracing the parts of herself that everyone else seemed to hate. It's hard to love those parts of yourself when the world tells you that they don't align with the perceived notion of beauty. The only thing she was secure in was her intelligence. And suddenly that rug is ripped out from underneath her. Because from her understanding, her mother would have her mask that part of herself. As if her appearance should come before all else. She hopes that the message must have gotten lost in translation, but she knows her hope is misplaced. Will was right about the gods after all. Their selfishness was inherent.

          "It doesn't matter," Piper finally utters.

          "Your dad's an actor," Will asks suddenly, shifting the topic whether intentional or not.

          "It's not a big deal," she insists, though her cheeks turn pink at Will's curious gaze.

          "If you know so much," Leo prods, "what's that castle?"

          She turns her attention back to the elfish boy, pleased to have a distraction even if it's Leo. "A hotel, I think."

          "No way!" he laughs, squinting to see the immense building. "The North Wind is staying in a hotel?" Leo carries on. "That can't be—"

          "Heads up, guys," Jason shouts over the wind, gathering the attention of his companions. "We got company!"

But Will has already spotted them and has a hand on the hilt of her sword, Éleos in the other hand, not being as careful as she should to avoid cutting someone. Will's grip on her own sword tightens as she sees the two approaching figures flying towards them with lethal look swords in both of their grips. They stop in front of Festus, and Will takes this time to examine them, clinical and tactical in every way. The only one that she deems as a real threat is the big brute who shares a bloodthirsty look that Will knows all too well, but he also looks malleable and dull. Will has dealt with far worse creatures than him.

          Fear is a foreign thing.

          The larger of the two who looks built for a fight, more daunting than his companion, grunts deeply. "No clearance."

          "'Scuse me?"

          "You have no flight plan on file," the other one said with what Will identifies as a French accent, though he makes it sound like nails on a chalkboard and Will yearns to carve his vocal cords from his throat.

Will grows tired of their meaningless conversation, itching to impale one of the strangers, or better yet rip the wings from their bodies and let them plummet. She wonders what Annabeth is doing now, or Sherman, or Will—wondering if they miss her at all or if their lives have been unchanged by her absence. She sours. From what she does hear of the conversation, a lot of it is Zethes fawning over Piper's uncanny beauty and Cal complaining about wanting to destroy something, though what he doesn't know is that Will would snuff him out like a candle. She also notices Zethes' attention turn on her, honing in on the sizable scar across her face that looks like a tear in space. He looks at the mark with distaste, but Will just glares at him, thinking how easy it would be to sever his head from his body. Too easy.

They begin their descent, following the boreads, both of whom Will still longs to impale. Feeling a hand on her arm, gentle and hesitant like trying to tame a wild animal, she shakes it off, glaring at the horizon and refusing to find comfort in another golden boy who will ultimately leave. Nothing about Jason screamed permanence. Like a storm he would soon dissolve and leave nothing but bitter memories in his wake. It took almost a year for Will to open up to Annabeth and Sherman, but only a month with Luke and he was her person. He was her friend and now he was gone—another golden boy lost to the winds.

IT'S TOO COLD, Will thinks as she slides down easily from the dragon's back, not waiting for her companions as she surveys the gaudy ice castle. It unsettles her, but then again she's always been a cynic, too willing to set little fires everywhere. The light that's let in through the windows is muted but still casts a glow around the room that reflects off of the surrounding ice. It looks haunting. There's no comfort found here and she's not the only one who thinks so.

          Leo eases himself down Festus' side, landing with a crunch on the snowy carpet. "Guys," he calls out, eyeing their surroundings with childlike wonder, "fix the thermostat in here, and I would totally move in."

          "Not me." Jason says without a second thought. He's made up his mind about this place, and just from the way that Will's eyes flicker around the room, hand lightly resting on her dagger, he knows that this isn't somewhere he wants to be. "Something feels wrong. Something up there..." he trails off, watching the stairs like they might come to life.

          Festus shudders and snorts a stream of flames against his side, melting the frost that starts to coat the metal, threatening to form an ice chrysalis around the dragon. Zethes sees this and storms over, crying out, "No, no, no. The dragon must be deactivated. We can't have fire in here. The heat ruins my hair." The dragon growls in response, eyeing the boreads like he might burn them alive. Will thinks she might do it herself if he doesn't.

          "'S'okay, boy." Leo reassures the metal beast, then turns to Zethes. "The dragon's a little touchy about the whole deactivation concept. But I've got a better solution."

          "Destroy?" Cal suggests. Will eyes him dangerously.

          "No, man. You gotta stop with the destroy talk. Just wait."

          "Leo," Piper begins, "what are you—"

          "Watch and learn, beauty queen. When I was repairing Festus last night, I found all kinds of buttons. Some, you do not want to know what they do. But others... Ah, here we go." Leo reaches behind the dragon's leg, flicking a switch that leaves Festus shuddering uncontrollably. Then he starts to fold in on himself, collapsing until all that's left is a metal box. Leo tries to lift it but ultimately fails, which Will finds unsurprising given his scrawny frame. He's no warrior. "Um... yeah. Hold on. I think—aha." He presses another button which causes a handle and wheels to jut out. "Ta-da! The world's heaviest carry-on bag!"

          "That's impossible," Jason gapes. "Something that big couldn't—"

          "Stop!" Zethes orders, drawing his sword as Cal mimics him. Will draws her own sword in retaliation, which turns their attention from Leo to her. She feels Piper tug at her elbow.

          Leo raises his hands. "Okay... what'd I do? If it bothers you that much, I don't have to take the dragon as carry-on—"

          "Who are you?" Zethes interrupts his rambling, shoving the point of his sword against Leo's chest. Will might have done something if Jason hadn't also grabbed her arm. This is familiar to her. Annabeth might have done the same thing, not looking to a start a battle they might not win. He continues to accuse Leo. "A child of the South Wind, spying on us?"

          "What? No!" Leo exclaims. "Son of Hephaestus. Friendly blacksmith, no harm to anyone!"

Cal growls, bringing his face to Leo's which makes the smaller boy recoil. "Smell fire. Fire is bad."

          "Oh." Leo feels his heart pounding. "Yeah, well... my clothes are kind of singed, and I've been working with oil, and—"

          "No!" Zethes angrily pushes Leo back at sword point making the boy stumble like a newborn deer. "We can smell fire, demigod. We assumed it was from the creaky dragon, but now the dragon is a suitcase. And I still smell fire... on you."

"Hey, look... I don't know—" He glances at his companions in desperation, seeing that Jason has now let go of Will who brandishes her sword like she's going to war. "Guys, a little help?"

          Jason realizes the severity of the situation, his gold coin resting in his palm as he sends Will a look. She understands. He turns to Zethes. "Look, there's been a mistake. Leo isn't a fire guy. Tell them, Leo. Tell them you're not a fire guy."

          "Um..."

          "Zethes?" Piper smiles in an attempt to charm him once more, but the cold gets to her and her teeth chatter. "We're all friends here. Put down your swords and let's talk."

          "The girl is pretty," Zethes admits, "and of course she cannot help being attracted to my amazingness; but sadly, I cannot romance her at this time." He jabs his sword further into Leo's chest, sending numbness through his body as the frost spreads.

Will's no hero. She can barely stand Leo and hearing his voice makes her want to throw herself from Festus midair, but she doesn't like feeling threatened and she doesn't like the boreads, wanting nothing more than to carve them to pieces. She surges forward, clashing her sword against Zethes' with so much force that it falls from his cold hands. Too easy, she thinks. He glares up at her, his anger seemingly amplified as Will kicks his sword to the other side of the room, the slickness of the ice sending it sailing.

Cal laughs at his brother but steps forward to defend him anyway. It's easy to understand a brute like Cal, at least to Will it is. He relies on his strength, given he doesn't have anything else to rely on. His attacks are violent and bold, simply wanting to destroy rather than win the war. He lunges for her with all of his power, which Will expects as she sidesteps him, using his momentum to thrust him forward. He was vulnerable then, stumbling and disoriented from a failed attack. Will could have easily taken him down then. A kick to the back of his knee and one slice through the air that leaves him brainless in a much more literal way instead of figurative. But she doesn't. Sparing a glance to her companions, she sees them go stiff, Jason and Piper looking worried while Leo looks terrified. But she just circles Cal, sending a sidekick to Zethes face when he tries to sneak up on her. It happens so fast that all they really see is the boread's nose starting to spill blood as his face contorts into a pained expression, wiping desperately at the gore that threatens to stain. Will focuses back on Cal who has regained his composure though he looks far angrier than before. It's a game now—to her at least. Will let's a smile slip onto her features. It unnerves Jason how naturally it comes to her, how at home she looks in the chaos.

          "Stop," Jason commands just as Cal is about to rush Will again. "Leo's just a son of Hephaestus. He's no threat. Will is a daughter of Ares; Piper, a daughter of Aphrodite. And I'm the son of Zeus. We're on a peaceful..." Jason's voice falters, as both of the boreads turn to him.

          "What did you say?" Zethes demands. "You are the son of Zeus?"

"Um... yeah," Jason says hesitantly. "That's a good thing, right? My name is Jason."

Will rolls her eyes, lowering her sword for now. She steps away from Cal but not without a scowl, allowing Jason to pull her away from the situation.

          "Can't be Jason. Doesn't look the same."

          Zethes steps forward, examining Jason like a specimen in a petri dish. "No, he is not our Jason. Our Jason was more stylish. Not as much as me—but stylish. Besides, our Jason died millennia ago."

          "Wait," Jason says in confusion. "Your Jason... you mean the original Jason? The Golden Fleece guy?"

          "Of course," Zethes replies as if he's scorning the boy for his stupidity, which Will deems fair though it might not be since she's been learning about this for ten years. "We were his crewmates aboard his ship, the Argo, in the old times, when we were mortal demigods. Then we accepted immortality to serve our father, so I could look this good for all time, and my silly brother could enjoy pizza and hockey."

          "Hockey!" Cal grunts in agreement.

          "But Jason—our Jason—he died a mortal death," Zethes continues. "You can't be him."

          "I'm not," Jason agrees.

          "So, destroy?" Cal asks hopefully. He looks strained, his previous failure forgotten as he focuses on a new target.

          "No," Zethes sighs. "If he is a son of Zeus, he could be the one we've been watching for."

          "Watching for?" Leo asks dubiously. "You mean like in a good way: you'll shower him with cool prizes? Or watching for like in a bad way: he's in trouble?"

They hear her before they see her; a silky, hollow voice like snowfall and bitter winds. At the top of the stairs is a girl with unnaturally pale skin, high cheekbones and a gaunt figure that might be haunting if she wasn't so beautiful. Her eyes were reflective like ice, and as they landed on each demigod they froze over even more.

"That depends on my father's will," she responds, voice sharp like ice yet still melodic. Will meets her gaze and the unknown girl glowers at how Jason's hand still rests on Will's forearm. "Father will want to see the one called Jason."

          "Then it is him?" Zethes asks.

          "We'll see," the girl says. "Zethes, bring our guests." She stops abruptly, turning to Leo who looks up in surprise. "Not you, Leo Valdez."

          "Why not?"

          "You cannot be in the presence of my father," she says scornfully. "Fire and ice—it would not be wise."

          "We're going together," Jason insists, placing a hand on Leo's shoulder with a determined look, "or not at all."

          "He will not be harmed, Jason Grace, unless you make trouble. Calais, keep Leo Valdez here. Guard him, but do not kill him."

          Cal pouts. "Just a little?"

          "No," she insists. "And take care of his interesting suitcase until father passes judgment."

          Piper and Jason look to Leo in question; Will just looks bored, but the boy just shakes his head anyway. "It's fine, guys," he says. "No sense causing trouble if we don't have to. You go ahead."

          The group starts to head towards the stairs with the unnamed girl leading the pack and Zethes following behind them, his threatening sword gleaming under the light. They stop again too suddenly, Khione turning around and glaring sharply at Will as if she has wronged her in some way. "You, Will Capote," she jeers, eyes locked on the way Jason's hand lingers near Will's. "You should stay here. Children of Ares aren't to be trusted."

It's not like she hasn't heard that before. Children of Ares are unpredictable and brash, too destructive in every way to be considered a friend. Still, she seethes.

          Jason seems to feel the same. His expression hardens like a marble statue. "Will's coming with us. I'm not going without her."

          The girl is fighting the urge to roll her eyes, instead maintaining her soft, diplomatic demeanor. "No need to worry, son of Zeus. Both of your friends will be perfectly safe—"

          "You're not listening," Jason interrupts. He doesn't want to be without Will for a multitude of reasons. For one she's the best fighter in the group—he doesn't have to know her that well to know that they'd be useless without her—and secondly, he is unwilling to leave her because... well he hasn't really thought of that. She's perfectly capable of taking care of herself; Jason knows that. He just doesn't want to leave her. He doesn't want to be without her. "I'm not leaving her."

          Will swallows her pride, sending a glare to the girl that could cut through glass. She knows that what Jason says is a lie—everyone always leaves—but she shakes her head regardless. "It's fine," she says. "It's probably best if I don't go. I tend to stir up animosity... so if we want this to go well it's better if I'm not there."

          Khione seems to furrow her brow at this. Jason just falters. He won't fight her on this, regardless of if he wants to. "I—are you sure?"

          "Yeah. Besides, someone needs to protect him," Will says, jabbing a thumb at Leo who's leaning against the metal box in attempt to look cool though he stumbles and ruins the illusion.

          "Hey! I resent that!"

          "Perhaps," Khione muses, eyes flickering with some kind of cunning, "I judged you too quickly. You should come with us. I'm sure you'll want as many of you as possible to plead your case."

          Jason looks ready to agree, but Will stops him, eyeing the girl with what could only be labeled as mistrust. She meant what she said about it being best that she wasn't there. Nothing good ever came from a child of Ares. "No," she decides. "I'll stay here."

          The girl hums in annoyance. "No matter. Your friends will be perfectly safe. I wish I could say the same for you, son of Zeus. Now come, King Boreas is waiting."

She leads the group away, but Jason looks back at Will. He feels the same. Something in the air weighs heavy and neither of them plans on letting their guard down. And then he's gone.

IT HADN'T BEEN LONG SINCE THE GROUP HAD SEPARATED, leaving Will with Leo and Cal, both of whom she resents immensely. She'd taken a seat on one of the rugs though that didn't stop the water from soaking through her pants and turning her legs numb. The cold seeped into every crevice until all she could feel was nothing.

Leo scoots over on his box while the wheels scrape against the ice in a grating way. It irks Will in unimaginable ways but she says nothing. He gives her a nervous smile. "So—"

          "No."

          "But I—"

          "No," she says firmly, pulling out Éleos and stabbing it through the ice in a way that announced finality.

          "Hey," Leo says quickly, eyeing the dagger sticking out of the ice and putting his hands up in defense. "Noted. I'm gonna go leave you alone forever now." He makes his way back to the center of the room, withering under Will's scrutinizing gaze. She's not like Jason described at all. Rather she's all sharp edges and venom—too embittered to have any sliver of humanity left in her. How could anyone see good in her?

          Cal approaches Leo and says, "Hockey." He can't tell if it's a statement or a question.

          "Enough with the hockey, man. You've gotta have other interests."

          "Destroy," Cal offers.

          "You know," Leo says thoughtfully. "You and Will would have a lot in common. Maybe you should go talk to her." He really just wants to get Cal away from him and seeing what happens next might be entertaining enough.

          Will doesn't hold the same sentiment. She glares at the boy from across the room, the heat of her gaze being a light to melt the ice. Still, Cal makes his way over to her anyways much to Leo's amusement and Will's annoyance. She stands up, unsheathing her sword in a warning, which is a decent attempt at politeness coming from her, but the boread stops a couple feet away from her, smelling the air in a way that suggests he's straining his senses. "Fire," he says and shakes his head like even the scent has burned him. "Smell fire."

          "Oh, yeah," Leo pipes up. "You said that was me."

          "No," Cal disagrees. "Her fire."

Will scowls at Cal's finger that points directly at her. She does something unexpected and retreats back to her seat against the wall, slumping down with her sword next to her. It's too easy to remember all the things she's trying to forget. And now that he mentions it, Will smells the fire too—pungent black smoke and worse is the scent of decay. Cal leaves too, mumbling to himself about how fire is bad and Will can't help but agree.

          This encounter seems to spur Leo forward. He approaches her hesitantly, mind running rampant with more questions than answers. "So, you smell like fire..."

She rolls her eyes, not looking up at him. Her eyes are downcast, seeing shadows of flames flickering against her hands—hands that were only meant for destruction.

          "Can you... control fire?"

          "Can you?" she counters, though nothing is meant by it. She just wants to be left alone.

          "No!" Leo says quickly, laughing nervously while his hands fiddle with the zipper of his jacket. "No..."

          "You're a bad liar," Will sighs. She just sounds sad, not even angry anymore. That might scare Leo more. It was easier when she was just this unfeeling thing, not living or breathing like the rest of them. But what's one to do when monsters have feelings just like you.

          Are they even really monsters at all?

          "You can't tell anyone," he demands, keeping his voice hushed so it doesn't echo throughout the grand hall and reach the ears of anyone who might be listening. The only one there to listen is Cal who has found a hockey stick and puck to entertain himself with.

          "Why would I?"

          "Right," Leo says, looking down. "So, do you have... powers?"

          "No."

          "Look," Leo groans in an uncharacteristic display of exasperation, "I'm just trying to figure things out. Apparently the last time a child of Hephaestus had fire powers was 1666—like, that doesn't even sound like a real year," he scoffs, throwing his hands up in defeat. They fall against his lap and he seems to grow somber. "I just need to know that I'm not alone in this."

          "I'm not your therapist," Will spits. "So, I really don't care."

          Leo just looks disappointed, but then his lips tilt upwards in a weak attempt at a joke. "I've never even been to therapy, but I probably should. Who's got two thumbs and a lifetime of childhood trauma?" he asks comically, pointing two thumbs at his smiling face. "This guy."

          Will glances at him from the corner of her eye, watching him deflate as he leans against Festus, heading tipping back against the wall. She's seen this look a lot, worn it a lot. He's scared of being alone with the thoughts that tell him he's a monster. He can't look at his hands without thinking about what they've done. She understands.

          Begrudgingly she says, "There's not that many gods that can control fire. Not totally at least. Hestia, Hephaestus and Hecate are the only ones that I can think of—and Hecate's is through magic."

          Leo looks up with curiosity. "But you can control fire too... can't you?"

          "I—" Will falters. "My father, Ares, can control fire. Not to the extent of your father, but still..." she trails off, some soft part of her tells her that he needs this. He needs to hear that he's not alone in this life. "I've never heard of another child of Ares inheriting this power. Mostly we're just proclivity for warfare and have control over weapons. And like I said earlier, we can manipulate people's feelings, but only animosity really..."

          "Animosity? Like anger?"

          "Yeah."

          He looks hesitant to ask again, but he needs the confirmation. "And you can control—"

          "Yes," Will barks out, tired of his prying.

          "You're ashamed of it," Leo deduces.

When she looks down her hands are red and sweltering, the smell of burning flesh penetrating her nostrils. Leo starts to talk. She looks back down and they're just hands.

          "It's not something I'm proud of either." He looks hesitant to continue, but he does because of the way Will's hands shake and the way his own voice starts to feel heavy. He has to tell someone. "When I was eight my mother died in a fire. I didn't know what I was doing but I was just scared, you know? I was just trying to protect her. After that, my tía called me diablo... devil."

Will doesn't say anything. She's almost scornful. Leo's was an accident, an act of desperation out of love. But hers? An accident, yes, but love? No—not quite.

Leo rubs at his eyes. She's supposed to say something now. He's shown her the ugliest parts of him and she says nothing. He doesn't know what he was expecting. He knows what she thinks about him. Will doesn't think that people are people. She thinks they're pawns to be used to her will. Monstrous is what he'd call her.

          "When I was young my mom never liked to talk about my dad. I know that it hurt to think about him, but when I was little, I just... I just wanted to be normal. I thought that maybe if I knew who he was then I might feel whole in some way, like he was the missing part of me. So on my seventh birthday, I decided that I would ask her," Will says, swallowing thickly. She won't meet Leo's eyes but she can tell that he's watching her. "I thought she couldn't say no because it was my birthday. I just remember being so angry. And I knew that she was angry too, even if she didn't want to be..."

          "Your powers," Leo mumbles softly, thinking how much anger must live inside of this girl, how much she must hate herself for what she is and the things that she's done. Maybe not a monster, he thinks.

          She nods somberly. "I don't know how it happened. It was just a spark... but afterwards I felt like I could burn an entire city."

          "It's a curse," Leo says after a moment.

          "It is," Will agrees. Her hands feel hot so she presses them against the ice until they go numb.

They fall into silence and it suits them best. Their confessions weigh heavy but there is commiseration shared between them. Misery loves company after all. Even when their companions rejoin them, she can still hear Leo's words in her head: It's a curse.

She thinks to herself, I'm cursed forever. And the violent bray of her heart tells her it must be true.

note: so will did not go with them to see boreas this time cause i wanted to give her some time alone with leo to bond. both of my fire babies hate their powers and accidentally killed their moms...

also i know that my author's notes are low key annoying but i want some feedback on the chapter lengths. like do you guys like how long they are now or is it boring to read all of that in one chapter. like when i first started this book the chapters were like 1000 words and now they're like 4000-5000 words. also any general feedback on the book is welcome!!