Chapter Eleven:
Your Pain Is My Pain

"Gav, are you sure you'll be fine," Michael asked me for the tenth time.

"Yes, Mi-cool. You're only gonna be gone for an hour at the most. I'll be fine," I told him, smiling.

Michael sighed and nodded, pressing his body against mine. I smirked and pressed my lips against his, biting them gently.

"I'll see you later. If you don't feel right, please call me. Please," Michael said. I nodded and smiled, hugging him and letting him go.

Once he was gone, I plopped on the couch and closed my eyes, sighing gently. For once in my life, I didn't feel the urge to cut or inflict pain on myself. I actually felt like doing nothing other than lay on the couch and sleep.

About five minutes after Michael left, I heard the door to the apartment open back up. I blinked open my eyes, wondering how Michael could have gone to work and returned that quickly.

I pushed myself up, looking at the person that walked in.

"Dad?" I said shakily as I recognized the person.

Immediately, he raced at me, making me scream and jump off the couch. I made a dash for the bedroom, thinking over the things that Michael had under the bed.

I immediately ran in there, shutting the door behind me and trying to lock it. However, my father pushed up against it, shoving the door back open. I pushed back as hard as I could, feeling tears begin to prick my eyes.

"Leave me alone!" I screamed desperately.

"Come on, Gavin. Be a good little boy," My father taunted me.

I suddenly felt weak with fear as my father started repeating the words from my nightmares. He shoved open the door, making me cry out in fear. He jumped on top of me, shoving me down on the bed while I kicked, punched and even bit him, trying desperately to break free.

"Stop it, Gavin. Stop it now. You made me a freak back home. Now I'm gonna make you a freak worldwide," My father growled. He gripped my hands and held them above my head. He eventually pressed his legs against mine so I could no longer kick them.

"Let me go! Michael'll be back soon and then he'll kill you! He'll literally kill you!" I growled, trying to scare him. It didn't work of course.

"Hush, Gavin. You know talking is only gonna make it worse," My father whispered, smirking evilly.

I shook my head, trying to wiggle my way out of his rock solid grip. I cried out in frustration and fear and he began unbuttoning his pants.

"Don't! Please! No!" I cried out.

Suddenly, my father lashed a fist across my face. He knocked me square in the nose, making it bleed. I shut up immediately, having my ability to breath through my nose decreased. I felt dazed and dizzy and my father took that to his advantage. He grabbed a roll of duck tape from his back pocket and taped it around my mouth and hands. I mumbled out curse words and screams but they were quickly muffled by the tape.

My father hauled me up and placed me further onto the bed. I tried to fight back again but I found it to be no use. He flipped me so I was laying on my stomach, and he again tied up my hands, however he tied them to the bed posts.
Tears streamed from my eyes, as well as the blood from my nose as I felt him begin to pull my pants off. In this moment, I wanted so much to die. I wished I could die of a heart attack, or suffocation, or something. I didn't want to relive this.

I felt him push inside me and I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to scream out in pain and desperation. I felt so disgusted and violated.

He sped up, growling horrible things to me. I continued to cry and shake, trying and trying again to scream out for help.

Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted my phone sitting near my side. It must have fallen out of my pants pocket when my father ripped my pants off. I tried to bring it closer, feeling more pain erupt when I tried. It was a desperate and stupid attempt, but I had to try something.

Suddenly, I felt a warm gush inside me and I tried crying out again, feeling all the more disgusted. My father just raped me. My own father.

"Good boy, Gavin," My father told me. I twisted my head around to look at him, pleading him to let me go.

"Well, I really must head back to England. You're mother told me to give you something," My father said. He suddenly ripped the duck tape off, making me gasp in pain. He bent down to me and pressed his lips against mine, shoving his tongue in my mouth. I pulled away, feeling vomit race up my throat as he triggered my gag reflex.

I threw up immediately, making him back away. Anger flashed in his eyes as he watched me get sick.

"You shouldn't have done that. But oh well, it'll make a better video," He growled, holding up a camera. A fresh wave of tears burst from my eyes before he punched me across the face and knocking me out.

...

When I awoke again, I was in a bright white room. I squinted my eyes against the lights and whiteness, moaning out as pain erupted from my head and lower back.

"Michael! He's awake," I heard someone whisper yell. I blinked open my eyes again, ignoring the brightness of the room.

"Oh thank god. You okay, Gav?" Michael asked me. I shrugged and moved my back a bit, only feeling more pain, making me moan again.

"Careful. The doctor said you're gonna be sore," Michael informed me, sitting in a chair closer to my bed.

"What happened?" I asked, hearing my voice to be quiet and hoarse.

"Um... Well, that's what we were gonna ask you. Do you not remember?" Geoff said.

Suddenly, memories of what happened before I was knocked out came to mind and I cringed and began shaking as the thoughts became overpowering.

Michael took my hand gently and rubbed it as I began crying again. He looked back at Geoff, as if asking him to leave on a silent note. Geoff nodded, understanding and left.

"Come on, Gav. Please tell me," Michael asked me gently, squeezing my hand encouragingly.

"I-I was... I was-," I stuttered.

"You were what?" Michael asked me.

"I-I was raped. By... By my father," I choked out.

Michael nodded, squeezing my hand again. He gently brought it up to him and he kissed it gently, rubbing the back of my hand on his cheek. More tears poured from my eyes as I remembered the disgusted feeling I felt whilst being raped.

"You're okay now. I promise. I'll make sure your father is punished for this. Didn't you say he's done stuff like this before?" Michael said. I nodded, wiping away a couple tears.

"Okay. I'll defiantly make sure he's punished. Nobody should ever get away with rape. Especially someone who decided it'd be smart to rape my boyfriend," Michael growled. I could see the rage alight in his eyes and I smiled as I realized my old Michael was back.

"There's the smile I love," Michael purred. I smiled more after that, pulling him over me and hugging him tightly.

...

I was released from the hospital later that day. The doctors told me to take it easy and to avoid any heavy mental concentration due to a minor concussion I had. Not like it was something I really had to watch out for. I'm an idiot.

Now, Michael and I were curled up on the couch, watching some weird movie on Netflix. I wasn't really paying much attention though.

My thoughts were drifting off to a bad place. I was trying my best to prevent those bad thoughts but it was happening anyway.

Eventually, I excused myself to the bathroom. Michael let go of my waist and let me go, kissing my cheek before I walked away.

Once I was in the bathroom, I immediately searched for my razor. Once I found it, I took it apart and immediately pressed the blade to my skin.

I clenched my teeth together as the blade drew blood. It was very painful due to the lack of cuts that I had made recently. However, I did not stop. I continued with the cuts, making another one right below the one I just made.

Suddenly, I heard the door get unlocked and Michael walked in. I looked up at him, waiting for him to give me a disappointed look and a pep talk about life.

However, that's not what he did.

Instead, Michael simply walked out of the bathroom.

Puzzled, I stared at the door, wondering what he was doing. When he finally returned, I noticed one of the box cutters in his hand.

"How many cuts did you make?" Michael asked me.

"T-two," I stuttered out.

Michael nodded and made two quick horizontal cuts on his wrist. I watched in shock and horror as he did this, immediately setting down the razor and grabbing Michael's wrist.

"What are you doing?" I asked him, turning on the water and trying to rinse his wrist off. Michael tore his hand from my grasp, shaking his head.

"If you cut, I cut. If you burn, I burn. If you commit suicide, I commit suicide. You're pain, is my pain, Gavin. I'm not gonna let you go through this alone," Michael told me.

I blinked in shock at him. Slowly, I lifted the razor back onto my skin. Michael lifted the boxcutter back onto his skin, waiting for me to make a cut.

"I'm not gonna let you hurt yourself," I told him.

"Okay. Then don't cut. Then I won't," Michael told me simply.

I watched him, wondering where he came up with this. Or maybe he came up with it on his own and this is truly what he felt.

Eventually, I set the razor blade down for good and rinsed my cuts off. Michael smiled at me and joined his wrist in with mine. I watched the blood wash away, wondering if there would be more if Michael hadn't walked in.

Once our wrists were cleaned off, Michael wrapped them up. I smiled slightly at him, loving how caring he could be when he needed to be.

Eventually, Michael pulled me up and hugged me tightly, pressing his lips against my cheek. I gently wrapped my arms around him, burying my face in his shoulder.

"I'm so proud of you, Gav. You're another step closer to beating this thing," Michael whispered.
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I'm really sorry for the late update. I'm in my last week of school which means I have tests every day. Like for example, tomorrow, I have my algebra regents (which is the biggest and most important test I am taking).
Thank you for understanding that updates are gonna be slow this week. But I promise, next week, updates will be more regular since school will be over.
Please let me know what you think. It gives me a boost to write. If you guys don't like this, then I can very easily begin another story that you will like. So please, let me know what you think or you can give me constructive criticism, or even just a question. Anything.
Thanks for reading!