who's excited for christmas?

tom gazed at his ceiling, the only thing illuminating his dark room being the streetlights shining through the half-opened curtains. he sighed and lifted an arm over his head to gaze over the scars on his wrist. in all honestly, they were getting better. the red color had gone and they basically blended in with his skin. sometimes, when stressed, he'd lightly run his fingers over the small bumps that were just barely there.

"stay alive, stay alive, for me.." tom sang under his breath, eyes lidded. he hummed the rest of the tune and turned his head to look at his alarm clock. the harsh neon letters read 10:47 pm. he rolled his nonexistent eyes and turned to look at the ceiling again. he couldn't sleep for some reason, so he decided to lay there quietly.

as expected, tom's mind wandered to the thought of tord. ugh, that little...

tom sighed.

i guess i can't really call him a prick anymore. he's trying his best.

"but matt and edd can't find out." tom whispered to the empty room. he dragged a hand down his face before examining the back of his hand. they'd kill me.

the feeling of his phone vibrating next to his leg
made tom gasp in surprise. he flushed in embarrassment despite being the only one there, picking up his phone anyway and checking what the notification was. it was a text from... tord, of course.

tord: hey, tom. are you awake?

tom: yes, why

tord: i wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tmrw?

tom's blood ran cold and he narrowed his eyes.

tom: like doing what?

tord: haha i was hoping you'd figure that out

tom: well idk

tord: um how about we just catch up on things? im sure stuff has happened in the past year

tom: okay..

tom: where

tord: my house? i got a new place, its not the old one

tom: could you not clean the bloodstains off the floor?

as soon as tom sent the message he smacked himself on the head and sighed. yet, for some reason, he felt a spark of satisfaction when the three typing dots popped up for a moment, then disappeared. it took a minute for tord to respond.

tord: sorry

tom: i'd rather not meet at your house. lets meet at the park and we can walk

tord: okay. is 6 good? i kno you have work

the statement made him grimace.

tom: yea, bye

tord: cya

with a heavy sigh, tom placed his phone back down and ran a hand through his hair. why did tord have to come back and ruin everything?

this fucking sucked.

~timeskip~

tom dragged himself into his bedroom as he arrived from work. instead of coming home with him, matt and edd had gone off to do some grocery shopping.

he threw down his bag and flopped face first on his bed, comfort enveloping him.

until he remembered he had to meet tord.

tom groaned and stood up again. he exited into the hallway towards his bathroom, not looking forward to the encounter.

time passed as he got ready until it finally turned 5:30.

tom decided to wear a dark blue knitted sweater and black overalls since he knew it'd be a bit cold. just as he walked out of his room and headed to leave, the front door swung open. in walked matt carrying a reusable grocery bag with edd trailing behind, holding another.

"o- oh, hi guys." tom greeted, startled as he took a step back.

"it's so damn cold out!" matt complained after putting the bag down and taking off his jacket to feel the warmth of the indoors. "where are you going?"

"huh? i- uh, nowhere." tom stuttered and immediately cursed himself for lying. idiot. idiot. idiot.

"really? it looked like you were about you walk out." the ginger raised an eyebrow.

"oh, um... nope," tom shook his head. "i was gonna get something in the kitchen, but i forgot."

"oh? okay." matt shrugged as he started to put things away.

"mhm. i'm gonna go take a nap." he nodded, turning and shuffling down the hall. reaching his room, tom locked the door and sighed into his hands. i'm such an idiot.

his gaze slowly lifted to look at his window, an idea popping into mind.

well, he didn't have any other choice.

tom smacked himself on the head and walked towards it. he climbed on his bed and pulled the curtains apart, noticing how the sun was almost gone. he opened the window and hesitantly leapt out, landing safely on the half-dead grass. a cold breeze made him shudder but he ignored it and started to walk to the park.

when the park came into view, it had just turned about 6:05. tord's figure could be seen sitting on a bench, looking at something on his phone.

"hey." tom muttered once approaching the other male, arms wrapped around himself as another cold gust of wind made him shiver.

tord looked up at him, a small smile on his face. he put his phone away and stood up. "hi. ready to walk?" he motioned towards the long stretch of sidewalk.

tom tried not to let the smile affect him too much. he simply nodded and began to walk, the norwegian pausing in confusion but eventually catching up.

"so, uh.. what have you been up to?" tord ventured when a few minutes of awkward silence passed.

"i still work at the cafe." tom said curtly, staring at the ground and trying not to let their steps fall in sync. "i live with matt and edd."

"oh. that's nice."

"mhm."

"...you, um, happier?" tord asked quietly.

tom instantly tensed up and turned to glare at him. "well, i was." he scoffed.

"right. sorry." tord averted his gaze and chewed on his bottom lip.

with a roll of his dark eyes, tom sighed. "that was unexpected. sorry."

"it's alright." he shook his head. "how are matt and edd?"

"good. they're engaged." tom accidentally let the news slip. his eyes widened and he immediately slapped a hand over his mouth, face flushing in embarrassment. why did i tell him that?

"seriously?" tord raised his eyebrows. "that's great. when's the wedding?"

"oh, uh- um, yeah, i don't- i dunno." tom lied, playing with his sleeves. he knew it was obviously he was lying but hoped it wouldn't be pointed out.

"oh."

"...mhm."

tord nodded and stayed quiet.

tom shivered again before saying, "how was rehab?"

"it was alright," tord shrugged. "a lot of other druggies there and no one really liked me. they sort of treated us like children. i'm better now, though, so i'm glad." he explained.

"yeah. i just... why would you come back here?" tom suddenly blurted out. "this town isn't exactly a place full of good memories."

tord ran a hand through his horns and sighed deeply. "yeah, i don't know. it's not like i'm rich right now. i can't exactly move, and anyway, i don't know where i'd go."

tom nodded understandingly. "okay."

there was more silence.

suddenly, tom shivered again and frowned. "it's so damn cold." he growled under his breath. "the weather has been all over the place."

"here." tord took off his camo-print jacket and placed it over tom's shoulders, now just having on a black long sleeve shirt.

the action instantly made heat rush to tom's face. he convinced himself it was out of anger but stopped himself from saying anything rude.  "uh.. thank you."

"no problem. i don't get cold easily." tord smiled.

"that's good." tom's voice was barely above a whisper. he was still embarrassed beyond return from tord's stupid jacket and his stupid face and the way his smile was so stupid-

"you haven't told matt i'm out of rehab, right?" tord asked.

"uh, no. why?"

"just wondering." he seemed to hesitate as he added, "and... you won't, right?"

"it's not really in my plans, no." tom admitted.

tord let out a small breath of relief. "thanks."

"yeah." he nodded.

~timeskip~

tom exhaustedly walked back to the house and circled around to his window, grabbing onto the ledge and heaving himself up. with a groan of effort he managed to tumble inside and land on his bed, panting. "goddamn." he huffed.

sitting up, tom ran a hand down his face and got up to get changed into pajamas. he first began to take off the jacket-

wait-

fuck.

tom stared down at the camo jacket in his hands, eyes wide. "no. nonononono." he whispered. red creeped its way onto his face and he threw the jacket down on the floor, different emotions bubbling up inside him.

flustered, tom grabbed his phone and quickly texted tord.

tom: you forgot your jacket

he sighed and kicked it to the corner of the room. tom then began to change into sweats and a t-shirt. by the time he was done, he got a text back.

tord: damn, that sucks

tom narrowed his eyes and scoffed. that little cunt. did he plan this?

tom: mhm

tom: want me to bring it over tmrw..?

tord: ya sure :)

tom: k, text me your address later

tom: bye

tord: okay, ttyl

what a stupid jacket.