im starting school tomorrow and im
going to c o m m i t d i e

wedding day.

the reception was beautiful, though boring, but tom wouldn't ever admit that. more importantly, however, everyone was now at the after party. most of the people there were related to matt and edd or just some close friends they'd moved away from.

the room flashed with different colors, people danced on the dance floor, and loud music was playing.

definitely not tom's scene.

he didn't know anyone besides matt, edd, and ell and he had no idea where they were. tom had dragged a chair to the corner and sat there quietly. he didn't know what else to do, honestly. then he got an idea; a shitty, asshole idea, yet he did it anyway. tom took out his phone and texted tord, who he hadn't seen since the sleepover incident.

tom: hey

tord: hi

tom: im at matt and edd's after party for their wedding

tord: im assuming youre bored and they left you?

tom: yeppp

tord: i could go over there

tom narrowed his eyes and scoffed. he couldn't deny that, deep down, that was what he was secretly hoping tord would say.

tom: what???? in here?? you'd get your ass beat

tord: no, just in the parking lot

tord: i can park at the corner, no one will know, and we can talk and look at the stars

tom: romantic

tom: jk but fine, this is such an asshole thing for me to do

tord: i promise we wont get caught! i'll hurry

tom sent tord his location while suppressing a smile. he put his phone away and gazed around the room again, catching a head of ginger somewhere in the crowd. i can't believe i'm ditching my best friend's after party to meet up with a guy i almost killed myself over. when he put it that way, it sounded downright messed up. but he's changed for the better. he left that thought alone.

about ten minutes later, tom felt his phone buzz again. it was tord saying, im here, far corner. tom bit his lip and stood up nervously, eyes flitting around again. when he reached the
door he made sure no one was looking and then sprinted out of the room and down the hall, eyes wide. bursting out into the parking lot, tom exhaled deeply in relief. he saw the sea of cars and groaned. why so many? he weaved his way through them until he saw tord standing on the roof of his car waving his arms. excitement tingled in tom and he laughed.

"you're so childish!" he grinned. tord smiled, then stuck his tongue out.

tom rolled his nonexistent eyes and reached tord's car, climbing onto the roof. he laid on his back and gazed up at the stars.

"finally." he murmured.

tord laid down next to him with lidded eyes. "i have a strong feeling that you were lonely in there."

tom snickered and turned his head to look at tord. "you suck."

the other male turned his head as well. a smirk played on his lips and tom got memories of the old tord. his heart skipped a beat.

"tom."

"what?"

all of a sudden tord leaned forwards and pressed his lips against tom's, something bound to happen that night. but what caught tom off guard was the taste of cigarette smoke on tord. tom's eyes grew wide and he instantly shoved tord away and sat up, yelling, "what the fuck!?"

tord yelped and caught himself before he could fall off the car. he sat up as well and looked at tom in total confusion. "are you okay?" he frowned.

"no!" tom felt tears fill his eyes. "you fucking lied to me! you said rehab fixed you and you don't smoke anymore and- your 'roommate' doesn't fucking exist, does he?" he punched tord's shoulder, hard. "fuck you! you probably still get drunk every night and get into girls' pants and smoke weed! fuck you, tord!" he began to get off the car but a strong grip around his arm stopped him.

"tom, please, i can explain." tord said desperately and tried to tug him back. "i have changed, i promise-"

"shove that promise up your ass." tom snarled and yanked his arm away. he hopped off the roof of the car and angrily stormed back to the party, tears of betrayal spilling down his cheeks.

"tom, please!" tord began to follow him.

"i hate you! fuck off!"

"no, you don't! listen!"

tom opened the doors and walked down the hallway. without thinking, tord followed him inside and grabbed the angry male's arms.

"listen to me." the norwegian narrowed his eyes.

"f- fuck you.." tom whispered brokenly and turned around to glare up at him.

"i've changed, tom. i don't drink anymore, you could even check my fridge. i don't smoke weed and i don't talk to girls- or guys, for that matter. you're my only friend right now," tord explained cautiously. "at rehab they taught us not to change for ourselves, but for the people we love. the only thing i couldn't seem to tear myself away from was smoking." he hesitated and bit his lip. "i couldn't tear myself away from you, either. i love you."

tom's breathing calmed a bit and he stared at tord. fresh tears spilled down his face and his bottom lip quivered. he threw a weak punch at tord's chest and sniffled. "why did i trust you?"

"i can't lose you again." tord pleaded. "you can trust me, you really can, i swear. you can search every corner of my house and i promise you, you won't find a single thing that'll remind you of the past me."

"except cigarettes." tom muttered and the slightest hint of a smile came on his face.

"yeah, except that." he chuckled before frowning. "i'm sorry."

"it's... it's fine, i guess, but i'm still kind of mad." tom gave him a soft hug. tord hugged back and they stood in the hallway like that, alone together.

"ah, there you-" matt began to speak as he suddenly swung the door open and saw tom, a large smile on his face. but he stopped when he saw tord.

tom immediately pulled away from tord and stared at matt with wide-eyes. the ginger's expression contorted to one of confusion, then anger. the three stayed quiet; the only sound was the music from in the room spilling into the hallway.

"what the fuck?" matt breathed out and narrowed his eyes.

"matthew." tord's voice was calculated, his expression nearly unreadable.

"don't- it's okay, matt, please." tom's heart pounded in his chest and his entire body felt heavy with guilt. "he's-"

"get out." matt pointed at the doors behind the two and took a threatening step forward. "we can talk about this fucking later, i don't want you to ruin my goddamn wedding day."

tom and tord exchanged a glance but didn't say anything to each other. after a few moments,
tord turned and sulked away. tom's breath became erratic when matt's gaze fell on him.

"i was just-"

"you get out, too." matt scowled. "i can't believe you."

tom's eyes widened. he for sure thought his best friend wouldn't go against him. "matt?"

"go."

the brunette felt like he'd been stabbed in the heart, but at the same time he knew matt was feeling worse. "o- okay." tom hunched his shoulders and ran down the hall, catching up to tord in the parking lot and breaking down into heaving sobs.

"you'll be okay, tom." tord whispered and wrapped an arm around him.

"he fucking hates me."