i made it just in time. if you're reading this the day i posted it, in less than 24 hours i'm graduating from college and starting graduate school in just a few days. this has been an incredibly hard four years and it's time to flip to a new chapter. i wanted to get this chapter done for you guys as almost a graduation gift from me to you.

this chapter was hard. not once did i write this chapter without crying. it was triggering in all the ways possible. to complete this is a weight off my shoulders. the fog of my exhaustion with this chapter may be hiding its writing quality, so kindly point out any mistakes or typos.

with that, please enjoy <3

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"If ever there is a tomorrow where we're not together, there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart, I'll always be with you."

- Christopher Robin, Winnie the Pooh

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I don't think Jessica meant for us to hear. The door was shut, and the only light in the room was the digital clock by my bedside reading 4:04 am. Sleep tugged at my eyelids, but my heart tugged harder as I listened to Jessica's sobs, hushed and muffled, yet heartbreaking all the same.

I turned and stuffed my face harder into my pillow. My body felt heavy with the weight of the day that's not even officially begun yet.

    There was a rustle. A ruffling of blankets, the creak of the couch, then footsteps padding softly against the carpeted floor. I felt his presence even before he tugged down the corner of the blanket and crawled into bed with me. The weight of a refusal on my tongue lasted for only a second before I accepted Chris's embrace beneath the sheets. He enveloped me, one arm beneath the crook of my neck and the other wrapped around my head, holding me to his chest.

"You can cry, too, Darce," he whispered. "It's okay."

My fingers curled tightly around the fabric of his shirt. His words released a knot within me, and after a few long minutes, I let the tears fall.

Through the sounds of Jessica's crying and the silence of my own, I sought comfort in the cool fabric of the sheets and the warmth of Chris's body until the relief of sleep took us all.

Clear blue skies juxtaposed the mood of the hotel room the next morning. For how bright and vivid the world may have looked, I felt numb on the inside. I gazed blankly at my reflection in the desk's small mirror. I didn't own many black pieces of clothing, so Marissa lent me one of hers, a black mid-length dress with flowy mesh sleeves. My hair, grown nearly to the curve of my waist now, hung loose and straight, and I almost regretted not braiding it into my natural braid. My braid gave me something to fidget with. My fingers found their backup plan: the pearls of Evellyn's necklace. I squeezed them tight and looped my finger around the chain.

From my view in the mirror, I could see Jessica sitting on the floor in front of another mirror, straightening her own hair. Her makeup bag lay a few feet away, some of the products strewn across the floor. She'd tried to put some on earlier but had removed it all again when she fell into a bout of crying and tossed it to the side.

I could barely stand to look at her without my eyes starting to blur with tears. It was so unseeming to see Jessica this way, but it was the reality of the moment. The grief I felt for losing Miss Sylvi paled in complete comparison to what Jessica must be feeling. She was Jessica's mother in every aspect other than blood, and now she was gone.

I went to kneel down beside her and wrapped my arms around her neck. She gave me a weak smile in the mirror and patted my arm. "With your hair down and straight like that, you look a lot like when we were in the orphanage," she said.

"You think so?" I shifted into sitting crossed legged, leaning my head against her shoulder as I observed the both of us in the mirror. My light brown hair to her blonde. My brown eyes to her turquoise ones. "Well, are you sure you're not seventeen still? You look as gorgeous as ever."

"I may not be seventeen anymore, but you almost are. And you're becoming more beautiful every day," Jessica responded, taking my hand. She squeezed it as her eyes went glassy. "I know I've been a weepy mess since we got here, but Reece said to me that we should remember that, even though we'll be mourning, we'll still be celebrating Sylvia's life – and the life she gave to so many of us."

I nodded in response.

Miss Sylvia's legacy is the ripple effect she started for us all when she gave each and every one of us at the orphanage a new life. I thought of my own and all the things that were possible because of her. Because of the wondrous new life that she gave me.

Some aspects of that wondrous life walked through the door, bearing coffee and breakfast. Chris and Reece both were dressed in similar dress shirts and suit jackets. I flushed as Chris greeted me with a kiss on the forehead and handed me a vanilla chocolate muffin. Reece and Jessica shared teasing glances with each other at the sight.

I think Reece might have woken up the guests in the rooms above, below, and beside us with the sheer volume of his celebration-yell when we told them that there may have been a shift in our relationship status. Jessica, on the other hand, had shrieked and hugged me as if we'd just announced our engagement. While the status of our relationship hasn't been officially defined (just officially muddled by a certain pool makeout session), we were definitely beyond the "just best friends" category. But Chris and I agreed that conversations of that were to be saved for a later date.

I was thankful for the extra element of strength given to me by the subtle gestures of affection exchanged between Chris and I. In the bathroom before we left, a wave of nausea hit me, and Chris offered to brush my hair as I leaned over the sink in case I needed to throw up. He kissed me on the way out of the hotel, reminding me that I was safe to cry at any time and that he was there to do whatever I needed him to. And on the car ride there, he held my hand tightly as I looked out the window, tears coming and going like waves, and my heart picking up speed with every passing streetlight.

By the time we pulled up to the funeral home, I felt ready to vomit once again.

Reece cut the engine and let out a breath. We sat in heavy silence for a moment. From the backseat, I could see Jessica's shoulders begin to shake. Reece placed a hand on her leg, then turned to me and Chris.

"Today's going to be tough. It's going to be sad. But we're going to go in there and we're going to get through it together, all right?" he said.

At the same time Chris squeezed my hand, he leaned forward to touch Jessica's shoulder. "We're here, Jessica. In it together," he murmured.

I followed and reached out to place my hand on Jessica's other shoulder as Reece took mine and Chris's conjoined hands. "Together," I whispered.

"Always," Jessica choked, holding her hands over ours.

And in the heavy silence, amongst the grief and the sadness, were threads of something precious.

Solidarity.

Love.

Friendship.

It was this that I tucked deep in my chest as we stepped out of the car and headed for the doors.

I folded the piece of paper in half with a deep sigh and leaned my head back against the tiled wall. The invitation was slowly taken out of my grasp and replaced by a warm hand.

"Good job, Darce," Chris murmured, tugging me into an embrace. "You did it. You made it."

I sniffed and pulled back, patting an already soggy tissue to my nose. "That was really hard," I whimpered. Really fucking hard.

The funeral service was, to say the least, a blur of tears. Lots of tears.

From the speeches made, the stories told, and the pictures shown, there wasn't a dry eye in the room. I'd never seen so many people cry in my life. And that's okay. Because for us to grieve so deeply means that we loved her so dearly. And even if I felt like I was going to hear the sniffles, cries, and wails in my sleep tonight, the one thing I found a little solace in was just the sheer amount of people who showed up today.

So many people came. People of all ages, most from all across the country and even outside of it, had gathered here today to celebrate and say goodbye to Miss Sylvi.

It was a wondrous thing to think of how she must have affected each person's life enough for them to be here today. In the midst of the grief and the sadness, I still felt that sense of solidarity, love, and friendship. This concoction of feelings felt surreal and complicated.

The day was far from over, though. On the contrary, it was nearing just twelve in the afternoon.

I took the piece of paper from Chris and unfolded it, scanning its contents over again for the address. When the service came to a close, Josie, Miss Sylvia's daughter, announced to the crowd that she'd rented a place where we could all gather and continue the celebration of her mom's life. It was the next stop for the day, and we planned to stay until the end to help Josie and her family clean up after everyone left.

"Hey." We turned to find Reece turning the corner towards us. His mouth was set in a deep frown, and there was a slight hunch to his posture. When he reached us, he put a hand atop both our heads and ruffled it slightly. "Good job, you two. Hardest part's over."

I nodded, but glanced behind him. "Where's Jessica?"

"She's..." He released a breath. "She's saying her goodbyes."

Wordlessly, we followed Reece back to the room where the service took place.

Floor to ceiling windows bordered the room, illuminating the space with a brilliant light. The room was almost void of people now besides staff making quick work to gather all the grand bouquets of flowers so that Josie and her family could take them home. On the walls hung numerous pictures of Miss Sylvia throughout her lifetime – all treasured memories, accomplishments, and more. At the front, in front of the open casket, kneeled two figures.

Josie was a tall, curvy woman. She wore her auburn hair in a neat bun at the base of her neck. Freckles dotted all along her arm. Although Josie was nearly 30 years older than Jessica, they held each other's hands like they'd been sisters all their lives. Both raised by the same woman. Both heartbroken at their loss.

As soft cries began to echo through the room, Reece placed a hand on mine and Chris's shoulders and said, "Let's go, guys. We'll wait for her in the car."

My heart clenched as my eyes slid from their crying forms to the enlarged picture of Miss Sylvia beside the casket. It was a beautiful picture of her. She sat on the edge of a stone ledge in yellow and orange flower bushes growing upwards against a wall. A straw hat with a white ribbon sat atop her head, complementing the marigold sweater she wore.

I stared at the picture for a long time, determined to embed this picture of Miss Sylvia into my memory instead of the form I saw within the open casket. Eyes to the ceiling, I let other images of her flash through my mind. Miss Sylvia baking cookies in the kitchen. Miss Sylvia tending to the wounds of girls who fell playing outside in the Black Garden. Miss Sylvia poking her head through the door to say goodnight. Miss Sylvia with Papa in her cramped office as they signed paperwork for my adoption.

Goodbye, Miss Sylvia. Thank you for everything.

And with those final thoughts, I turned my back for the final time and followed the boys out to the car.

"Is this it?"

Chris and I leaned forward, trying to get a better look at the destination just ahead of us. We jostled around in our seats until the car reached the top of the gravel hill and pulled up next to a few other cars parked outside.

"Wow," I murmured.

The house Josie had rented for the celebrations was unlike anything I'd ever seen in my life. It was a huge two story mansion, yet it was quaint in its own way. The outside of the house was practically all white, from the exterior, the balconies, the windows, and even three tall pillars stretching from the bottom to the second floor. Tall surrounding trees loomed over the house, providing a serene privacy.

As we climbed out the car, a voice called my name. I jumped and whirled, my mind faltering to recall someone who would even know my name in the first place, when my eyes landed on a familiar face running to us.

"Kristy!" I exclaimed, welcoming the hug she quickly enveloped me in.

Her eyes were bright as she pulled back and held me by the shoulders, looking me up and down. "Oh, my God. It's been so long, Darce, look at you! You've grown so much!"

I laughed. "I'd say the same, but I think you just went from beautiful to stunning in these last couple years."

Kristy had been the second eldest girl in the orphanage during my time there, beneath Jessica, of course. She was... intimidating, to say the least. Just entering teenagehood, Kristy had a sharp tongue and a give-no-fuck attitude. She was brutally honest most of the time, but sometimes in a tough love sort of way. She was just a teenager then, and despite the years that have passed, Kristy still had quite a couple inches over me. Except now, her once bright blonde hair I'd seen in Jessica's photographs was dyed a beautiful shade of lavender.

Kristy's eyes shifted from me to Chris and lit up with recognition. "Oh, hey! You came, too, huh?"

When she looked back at me, there was a blatant look of mischief in her face, but she let it slide as Jessica stepped up to us and gave Kristy a hug of her own.

"Hi, hun'," Jessica greeted. "Are some of the other girls here?"

Kristy nodded in response. "Yeah, they're out back. Things are looking pretty good, too. Emery did a fantastic job."

I straightened, the sound of her name like dust blown off a faraway memory. "Emery?" I asked. "Emery's here?"

Jessica grinned. "I wondered if you might remember her."

And I did, even if my memories of her were limited to a very few snapshots in my memory. In fact, I recall seeing pictures at Jessica's of us the day Emery left the orphanage on her adoption day. We wore colorful boas bigger than our entire body. But the biggest thing was that I was fascinated by her naturally red and tightly curled hair. There was a time where Miss Sylvi had found the two of us in front of the bathroom mirror, balanced together on a single step stool as we wound pieces of my straight hair around different pencils we'd taken from the living room.

"Come on, we'll take the back entrance. Some of the other girls are here, too."

"Others?" I asked, stumbling as Kristy looped her arm with mine and pulled me forward. I spared a quick glance at Chris, but he nodded and waved me forward in a "go" motion before following Jessica and Reece inside.

I let Kristy guide me down a stone path on the mansion's left side. With wired arches yawning over heads and thick hedges accented with yellow flowers at either side of us, it felt like I was about to enter a secret garden. Instead, what met us on the other side was a large pool with a tiny water slide attached to the poolside architecture. Long outdoor sofas formed a U around a large fire pit, and a hammock the color of plums hung nearby. The nipping temperature chased most people inside, with only a few bracing the cold to talk outside. I could hear the chatter from the rest of the crowd through the backyard's sliding doors. Faintly, however, I could hear other voices coming from farther away. The sounds of people's laughter grew louder as I followed Kristy to the edge of the property, where a steep set of stairs led down to a lower lot.

The breath left my lungs as I saw the view.

To someone else, they wouldn't have understood the value of what I saw. They wouldn't quite understand when Kristy said Josie picked to host the celebration here because of this specific feature. But to me, the sight was everything.

At the bottom of the steps was a basketball court, but not just any normal one – it was a blacktop court. Not a majestic secret garden, but a Blacktop Garden, grander yet still reminiscent of the one at the orphanage. Not only was the sight of black asphalt heavily nostalgic, but right in the center, written in huge bubble font, were the words, "Sylvia, Our Angel." Some people took to coloring the letters, while others sprouted outwards, doodling and writing in an array of colorful chalk.

"This is amazing," I said to Kristy as we reached the bottom of the steps.

"The second balcony has the best view. Emery did a fantastic job with the center artwork."

Emery.

I began to look around for a girl with tight, red curls, but before I could see her amongst the crowd of parents, grandparents, and children drawing gleefully on the ground, I heard my name.

Emery's vibrant hair wasn't curly now, but straightened and pulled back into a low ponytail. She was much shorter than me or the girls that were with her. A black jumpsuit, covered with the dust of chalk, clung to the soft curves of her body. She ran to me with a squeal and chorus of "Oh my God" and "It's you!"

As I accepted her hug, I thought back to how many reunion hugs I've had just like this before. Kristy just a few moments ago, Jessica at my front door, Reece at his apartment, Chris in the cafe. Reunion hugs were the best hugs.

    "Darce, I don't know if you remember Zarah and Albany," Kristy said, waving forward the two girls that had been with Emery. Memories of them were more hazy and scarce, but I smiled and pulled them into an animated hug as well. As Albany and I pulled away, I saw another girl behind her just a few feet away, dressed in a simple black blouse and black jeans. She watched us with hard brown eyes and a rather... pissed expression.

    I jumped as Kristy addressed her, this time with a cold edge in her voice. "Rayna. Would you like to join us, or is this joyous moment not appropriate right now?"

    Rayna's frown deepened into a scowl. Zarah took me by the elbow and guided me back, making way for Kristy and Rayna to throw daggers with their eyes.

This was the Kristy I knew. The upward tilt of her chin, the straightness in her back, and the one hand planted on her hip. Suddenly, I'm six again, watching Kristy stare at Rayna the same way she did Reece when we were unsure of what kind of guy he was. Even then, Kristy was bold. Unintimidated by the intimidating.

I hesitated to speak, but the panic in me pushed the words out. I leaned towards Albany and whispered, "What's wrong?"

Before Albany could reply, Rayna spoke. "What's wrong is that Kristy's been walking around this place with nothing but a fucking smile on her face, as if this isn't a memorial meal for Sylvia."

Kristy gestured grandly to the lot around us. "The hell, Rayna? I'm not the only one smiling. As if we didn't cry enough at the funeral service itself. As if I didn't cry enough when I found out the news. I still visited Sylvia when I left the orphanage. She was at my high school graduation. She wrote me my letter of recommendation for college. I made sure to send her flowers every year for her birthday. I bake her cookie recipe when I need to cheer up. I still hear her voice giving me guidance whenever I'm unsure. Of course I'm fucking devastated! But if I were gone and I knew that people were only crying when they thought of me, I'd be pretty devastated about that, too," she snapped.

"So, yeah, it's her memorial meal. But sue me for smiling in her memory. For smiling when even though she's gone, she still happened to bring all of us here together." Again, Kristy gestured to us, to the house. "She...  would have loved this. Everyone together, even if it's without her."

The crowd around us had gone silent. Rayna's cheeks were ablaze, while Kristy's now had tears running down them. She swiped at them angrily.

"That's quite enough."

We turned to see Josie reaching the last step and walking towards us. She placed a hand on each of Kristy and Rayna's shoulders and smiled gently. "Girls. The grieving process is different for everyone. You are right to be sad. You are also right to be happy. You are allowed to feel both, or even none at all. Everyone will mourn Mom in a different way, but don't do it by arguing. Now that's something she wouldn't want."

The two girls murmured in agreement, and Josie nodded approvingly. She looked to us, then to everyone else in the court with us. "It's almost time to eat. Won't you please join me for lunch and a speech?"

Inside the mansion was a long table covered in various foods. There was enough to please the meat lovers, satisfy the seafood fanatics, and cover the bases of a vegetarian. An array of desserts, including cookies next to a printed out copy of Sylvia's chocolate chip cookies, were displayed along one table. While the crowd inside was smaller than at the funeral service, many people still did come. Before we could take our plates and line up for food, Josie called for everyone's attention as she stood on the second floor balcony and overlooked all of us.

"Good evening." Josie's voice echoed and resonated throughout the huge open space. "I know I should have said this earlier when there were more of us at the funeral service, but I just didn't know if I could get through it. I know now that I must say it, even if I do end up crying in just a minute."

I clenched my fists and braced myself for the blow of Josie's words. Almost as if he sensed my strength waver in that moment, a hand found the curve of my waist. Chris's scent reaching my nose was better than any dessert or pastry on the table. I covered my hand with his and squeezed as Josie continued, already dabbing at her eyes with a tissue.

"I know my mother. I know that she carried a heart bigger than what her chest could hold. And I know that if she were to see all the tears we've shed today, that she'd be so upset. She would say not to fuss, and she'd pull that face that became all the more endearing as she turned into this cute old lady." Josie's hand dropped lower and lower as she indicated the way Miss Sylvia almost shrunk in size, and a chuckle rippled through the crowd. "In fact," she continued,  "Mom said to me that she doesn't want people to think of her and be sad. Seems impossible to do right now or even ever, but that's what she said. She said she wants us to smile in her memory and to laugh at the memories she made with you all."

Josie placed a hand to her heart. "And you know, today I've been watching you all connect and reconnect with one another and oh, Lord. I know my mom is just beaming down to see you all together."

Emery nudged her shoulder into mine, and the four of us exchanged a smile.

"Mom was dying of organ failure. and while she was in the hospital and we had to start thinking and...  preparing for if things turned, she looked at me and said, 'Get a pen.' She asked me to do two things. One was to invite as many of 'her children' and their parents. The second was to read you this note."

Josie took out a piece of paper and the room held their breath as she began reading with a shaky voice, "If my dearest Josie is reading this, then I'm here, but no longer here. I'm here only in the hope that you keep me alive and well within your hearts and within the memories we made together. While your heart might ache and your eyes may well with tears, please don't forget to remember me with a smile as well. I am honored to have met you. I am honored to have served you. My memories with you are more precious than the finest things in life, and I will carry them up with me to whatever awaits me on the other side."

The jacket from Chris's suit did little to nothing to keep me warm outside as the sun descended into the horizon. The feeling in my bare legs were quickly fading to numbness, but I let myself be one with the way I felt inside.

Cold. Numb. Frozen.

After Josie's speech, there was something a little lighter in the air. It was the sounds of a celebration – a true celebration of the life Miss Sylvi had lived. There were more stories, more memories, told around hearty plates of food, over drinks, and by the fireside. There was the connection of strangers, and the reconnection of old faces.

Emery, Kristy, Zarah, Albany, and even Rayna sat with me as we caught up on the past decade. Emery has a thriving art shop on Etsy. Kristy was set to graduate in the fall with a degree in Marriage and Family. Rayna would soon travel to India for a study abroad program. Zarah, heavily involved in a volunteer position at a marine rehabilitation facility, was working a career around that upon graduation. And Albany, still undecided about what she would take up as a major, has spent the majority of the past two years "thrift-flipping" clothing and selling them for a profit to help pay for school.

We were scattered all across the country, with Emery the closest to me in New Jersey, and Albany the farthest in Utah. It was when each of them began talking about their families did my heart begin to sink a little lower in my chest. Aside from Kristy, who was adopted as an older sibling to a younger brother, had larger families with a minimum of five people in their household. They all had stories of many cousins, grandparents, aunts and uncles. Some siblings were giving birth to new siblings every couple years.

And then... There was me and Papa.

Me, Papa, and maybe Suzie.

This is what led me outside to the second floor balcony, away from the crowd that was beginning to thin as the event came to a close.

The phone rang four times before Papa picked up. His ecstatic welcome at my call was enough to bloom heat within my chest.

I spared him – and myself – the exhaustive task of recounting the details of my day and, instead, told him of mine and Chris's day yesterday. I left out a certain watery memory before giving him the cliffnotes of the day today. As he went on to talk about all the things that went wrong since I've been gone (long doctor waits and an asshole air conditioning man) I couldn't ignore the rising panic that began to have a grip on my heart. It wasn't an unfamiliar panic, but a panic I've felt many times before. It was a true fear – a fear that I don't think I will ever be able to get rid of. But I could at least talk to him about it.

"Papa," I said once our conversation hit a lull. "I love you."

"Oh, well, I love you, too," he replied cheerily. "I'm excited to have you back home."

I gripped the necklace at my throat. The pearls were cool against my warm fingers. "But Papa... one day there will be a time where I can't have you come back home."

I shut my eyes and imagined the others downstairs with their families. Emery and Rayna who came with their parents. Kristy with her younger brother, dad, and step-mom. Albany with her parents and her four other siblings. I imagined them with their families, then I imagined mine.

I imagined Papa.

Papa, who has a growing number of pills he has to take daily.

Papa, with his cane that he sometimes refuses to use even though he clearly needs it.

Papa, who is here now but one day won't be.

Alone and away from others, I let the tears fall with no reservation. My knees felt weak, and I felt to the floor as if the weight of my feelings had finally pulled me down.

"I don't want to be alone, Papa. I don't want to lose you. I'll have no family. I don't want to be alone again," I cried.

Throughout today, as I watched Josie grieve for Miss Sylvi, I wondered how the weight of losing Papa would affect me. I imagined dark scenarios I shouldn't have and fed to the already festering fear that I've had since those girls from my school began to point out Papa's older age.

"Darcy, honey. Now you listen to me," Papa said. He tried for several moments to soothe me until I reached a point where the tears dried cold on my cheeks and I sat, sniffling, on my knees.

"God forbid you leave this earth before I do. I'd trade my soul to the darkness to let you have a long, happy life when I'm gone. And so there will be a time when I become your north star in the sky. And while I may not be physically there for you, you will never be alone, honey. You have surrounded yourself with people who will never let you be alone again."

As he said that, the door to the backyard slid open. Through the gaps in the balcony, I saw Chris and Reece step out and call my name out into the darkness.

"Doesn't look like she's out here, little man," said Reece.

"I'll double check down at the basketball court," Chris replied. The backdoor slid shut as Chris jogged forward and towards the steps. I called out to him.

"There you are!" he exclaimed, glancing up at me. "Come on down, Darce! Jessica said she has a dessert she's sure you'll love."

I smiled and stood, hoping the darkness hid my tear-stained cheeks. "'Kay. I'm just talking to Papa and then I'll be right down."

When Chris opened the door once more, he called "Reece! I found her, she's just up on..." His words faded as the door closed behind him.

"You know what Reece said to me once?" Papa said. "Blood doesn't make a family. Love does. And you are surrounded by so much love, my girl. And you will always have mine, no matter where I am."

"Yes, Papa," I whimpered. "I understand. I'll see you soon."

"See you soon, my little north star."

My hands fell loosely to my sides as I hung up. I looked to the sky, then back down. From up here, Kristy was right. I had the most perfect angle of the basketball court and the chalk art below.

Sylvia Our Angel.

I smiled. Sylvia, an angel before she even became one.

Before joining the others, I made my way down from the balcony and down the steps towards the blacktop. The floor was covered in chalk, and I wondered how many days of rainfall would it take to wash it all away.

I kneeled down and pressed a hand to the V in Sylvia.

"Thank you, Miss Sylvia," I whispered. "I'm ready to go home."

Home. To my papa, to my friends, to my coworkers. Back to the greatest gift of all: this beautiful, wonderful life that Sylvia had gifted me.

hi, friends <3 i hope you enjoyed the chapter. i feel so relieved to be finished. this chapter was so fucking difficult. please let me know if it was okay, i really can't tell at this point. either way, thanks for being on this long journey with me. may 16, 2018 was actually when i first began re-writing MD so you guys have actually been with me throughout my college career as i've worked with this story. i'm so proud to have gotten this far and i'm excited to keep going.

the biggest, fattest CONGRATULATIONS to anyone else who's graduating along with me. YOU DID THAT AND DESERVE TO CELEBRATE IT. it feels surreal to be graduating in less than 24 hours. college was actually a really bad time for me, and i'm afraid to repeat those bad times in graduate school. but let's all trust in the magic of new beginnings, shall we?

since i am starting graduate school on monday, i'm unsure when the next update will be out. i'll be navigating through that and i'll keep you updated, of course <3

chapter question: what does this year hold for you? what do you plan to do/want to do?

i love you guys so much. thanks so much for being with me on this rollercoaster of my life. i hope you guys will stick around for this new journey i'm about to begin.

gonna go graduate now xx