(CHAPTER FIVE :
HOUSE OF MEMORIES)

✧࿐ ཾ✧

SNAPPING MY OWN NECK like a twig was a witless, imperious decision of mine that I made without considering the consequences of it. Although the pain was manageable, the sluggish aching in my neck was relatively unpleasant. However, one thing was not nearly as 'manageable' was the unrelenting, pervasive throbbing in my head. To my misfortune, snapping my neck was not the quick fix I hoped for in subsiding the excruciating pain my head. It was pounding, stinging, burning.

Snapshots flickered through my mind, reminding me what happened before I released my strident scream and dropped to the ground in the most dramatic manner. Daggers. They were worn at the handle, used a lot perhaps. Klaus. He was intimidated by the message that accompanied the daggers. Kol. Striking a chord inside of me, a impromptu burst of discomfort propelled me forward, causing me to stagger several steps. Gripping the side of my head, I remained clueless as to what was wrong me, hoping to shake the tingling sensation away.

Blink.

For a reason unknown to me, Klaus was greatly satisfied by this detail. "Now, take this knife and stab it into your heart, love." He instructed venomously. For a reason unknown to me, I was greatly obliged to do as he commanded. And I did.

Blink.

"Kol," I called out to him, my voice high pitched as my gown got caught on the vine I was climbing down. "I think I am stuck." I fretted, tugging gently at my dress as I tried to untangle the material from the long plant that lead down from my balcony. "If I fall, would you promise to catch me?" I asked, a playful giggle bubbling an escape from my lips. This was all so thrilling.

Blink.

"Enough, Nik." An unfamiliar blonde zoomed in to scold the man before turning to grab my face, forcing me to meet her startling navy eyes. "You will forget of Nik and I, the name Mikaelson will become nothing to you from this point onwards. You had a lover many years ago, but you will not remember his name." She coaxed, my body drooping as her soothing voice drew me under her compulsion. "Klaus did not compel you to kill yourself, your death was natural and this meeting will be but a blank in your mind." She, for I still didn't know her name, finalised. Following that, she had blurred away before I could fathom how I had managed to be compelled.

Blink.

All at once, the memories bombarded me, battling their way through, desperately wanting to surface. Each time one did, it was like a gulp of fresh air after drowning for a century. From the sweet nothings he hummed to the memories that had been compelled away, they all freed me from the long suffering confusion I'd endured.

With the use of my newfound memories, a genuine delight in itself, I gathered that my last lover was an Original. If I were to be precise, Kol Mikaelson. As soothing as it was to know that I had a momentous love when I was human, it didn't help with the self-destructive fear I had of being unloveable. In fact, it only enforced it. After all, the man destined me to life of loneliness via a handwritten letter. Clearly, I wasn't made to be loved, only toyed with.

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Caroline Forbes, post human life, invited me to brunch at the Mystic Grill each Saturday. In my opinion, such a mundane thing kept her attached to her old life and I quite enjoyed the company of blonde, she always had a unique perspective on the world. Sadly, today was not a day I was particularly fond of her—or it could have been I was a little irritable after the dinner party still. Either way, her comments were exasperating.

"To clarify, you got the twentieth century equivalent of text-dumped?" She yapped for the third time, more astounded than the previous time. Once again, I had nodded in confirmation. "And then, Klaus compelled you to kill yourself and didn't know you turned into a vampire until decades later. So, he attempted to kill you again until Rebekah stepped in, compelling you to forget about the Originals." She babbled out, forcing all her words into one large breath. To this, I bobbed my head repeatedly. "Basically, I mean. I didn't mention the part where you had a forbidden romance with Kol, intended to marry another guy and was planning to run away." Caroline continued, lacking a filter, per usual.

"It sounded more action-packed when you put it like that, it was actually quite boring and you made out to be far wo——" I tried to excuse the hectic tale of mayhem, but simply groaned when I received the look from the girl. "Fine, it is exactly as bad it sounded." I raised my hands in faux surrender to the Forbes.

She sipped her soda, mumbling in understanding. Naturally, I knew this was purely a gesture of decency as she couldn't have possibly related or understood what those events were like for me. Never could she have associated with the despair of being lost both without and with memories. That was what it was like, I didn't know where to go from here or how to approach Kol when I next met him. Simultaneously, he was and wasn't a stranger.

"Very bad." She chirped in correction. "But, that is in the past, you have to reestablish where you stand with Kol now." Caroline explained, informing me of what I already knew I had to do and was hoping to avoid. If I avoided it, the problem didn't exist. "Lucky for you, I'm an expert at relationships and specialise in Originals who can't take a hint." She jived, her bubbly tone softening the blow of the news that I'd possibly have to confront an old lover.

At her comment, I laughed. Genuine, for once. But, my brightened features dimmed when a certain Original strutted into the bar. Rebekah Mikaelson. According to her, she wanted to have a 'human' experience in a primarily supernaturally inhabited town. Due to that, I doubted her honesty and had every reason to be cautious. If she wanted human, Mystic Falls was the wrong town.

When she began to approach our table, I shared an eye roll with Caroline, debating whether to walk out the bar before she could reach us, but I didn't. Maybe I stayed in my seat because I was always an inquisitive person or maybe I was craving the answers I knew she held—she was the one who compelled me.

"Hello, Caroline, Lottie." Rebekah greeted curtly. "I won't be in your way for long, I assure you, I just need to pass these on. Apparently Klaus and Kol think I'm some bloody messenger." She whined.

I didn't know if she expected a reaction, but the mention of Kol didn't spark one from me. I had spent a century with no recollection of him and had long-since mastered a blank expression. Not that I could say the same for a rather flustered Caroline. Knowing my friend would only spill unnecessary information under pressure, I took the lead and accepted the invitations from Rebekah's manicured hands. Opening it, I slyly raised an eyebrow.

"Please join the Mikaelson family
This evening at seven o'clock
For dancing, cocktails & celebration"

Over and over again, I read the invitation. Trapped in the past, much like I had been for a while, they were holding a ball. And, even if I knew I'd be enticed into going by my friends somehow, I was hesitant as with balls came bad memories.

✧࿐ ཾ✧

PORTLAND, OREGON [1908]

Distorted, I found myself unable to recognise the rippled shell of a girl that innocently stared back at me in the mirror. Her dull, grey eyes were surrounded by puffy, red blotches that had glass tears sprinkled around them. Her dirty, untamed hair was sticking up in every direction, knots and tangles framing her ghostly pale face. She couldn't have been me, but she was. And I knew that not even my hand-tailored gown would distract the critical eyes of the dinner guests from my monstrous appearance.

Smash. I punched the mirror. Smash. I was bleeding. Smash. I was crying again.

Hearing the madness, Kol zoomed into the room, his brunette hair disheveled from moving that quickly. "Bloody Hell." He muttered, moving to be at my side, just near my vanity table. "What have you done?" He sighed, already biting into his wrist to feed me his blood.

Shaking my head, I pushed his wrist away. "I do not wish to heal." I said bluntly. "I need the pain, I need to feel it to know I am alive, to know that this is real." I choked out between several waves of hysterical sobbing.

"I need you to heal, darling." Kol pleaded, edging his wrist closer as dark veins formed around his eyes. Reluctantly, I accepted a meagre amount, noting how his control was trembling around my blood. "Good, now, what happened?" He inquired, stroking my hair softly.

"I——I punched the mirror, Kol." I stated, picking up a broken shard to look at my reflection once again. It appeared worse than before, if possible. "I told Mother and Father that I did not want to marry Thomas because I loved another." I swallowed, the vivid memory of how Father slapped me roughly springing to mind. "Oh, they were so mad. They forbid me from seeing you again and the wedding is being moved forward. It is all a mess, the entire time I wanted you to be there to hold me, to tell me it would be okay." I whimpered, breathing at a dangerously sporadic rate.

He tore the mirror fragment from my hand, realising how obsessed I had become with looking into it. Then, after, he remained silent, occupied with contemplating something. And it worried me how vicious his silence could be at times. Never would he dare respect my parent's wishes, right?

"Run away with me." He blurted suddenly, his body shooting up. "We can run away together and I will show you the world, every wonder I have seen. It will be the two of us, always." He proposed, pacing around the room as he thought it over. The idea was ridiculous, yet perfect too.

I knew my jaw dropped and my knees weakened with at the suggestion, but I also knew how to regain my composure again easily. "Okay." I agreed with a laugh. "I will need to gather some necessities and will need a day or so, but I want to be with you. Forever." I admitted to him.

In seventeen years, I had never been spontaneous or unconventional and here I was, preparing to flee with Kol. For most of my life, I was confined to my family's home and the cobblestone streets around us, but I wanted more than that. If I could not be romantically involved with Kol in Portland, I did not want to reside there. Without him, I would never have found love. Maybe I was hopelessly in love with him, but his love was also the only thing that provided me with hope.

✧࿐ ཾ✧

Returning to reality, I realised that my left hand was curiously vibrating and my right one was rubbing my cheek. No doubt that was the reminder of the day my Father turned on his own daughter. Inhaling, I calmed myself down, telling myself it was in the past. It was only when I turned to discuss the predicament with Caroline that I'd noticed she was gone, whereas Rebekah lingered behind.

Her piercing eyes were set dead on me. "I know that you know." She told me vaguely, shrugging her shoulders off-handedly.

"I don't do riddles, Rebekah." I retorted, pressing my lips into a thin line. "Enlighten me, oh Original one, what do I 'apparently' know?" I dared, hiding my eagerness with nonchalance. Directing my attention away from her, I acted absorbed in my nails.

She grew annoyed fast, not used to somebody denying her of their undivided attention. "That your memories came back, Lottie." Rebekah seethed, slamming her hands down on the table. "Compulsion is broken when the vampire dies, or daggered in my case. And because I took away an entire chunk of your memories, they had to come back day by day since it would have killed you if they came back all at once. When Mikael was hunting us in the twenties, Nik daggered me and they have been retu——" Whilst she had been rambling, the female had been inching closer to me with each word.

I jerked my body away from the other vampire, creating distance between the two of us. "Rather than putting something something contagious on my lips, get to the point." I popped the letters when I spoke, unwelcoming of how I was forced to feel her hot breath pan onto my face. That was how close she was.

"You little wench, my brother's been near that mouth of yours so I certainly wouldn't want to be." The Original defended, her nose crinkling in disgust at thought of kissing the same person Kol had. God knows where he had been.

Mockingly, I patted her cheek. "Don't pout, do continue." I urged, mimicking her disgruntled facial expressions as she made them.

"Kol triggered the return of all the missing memories, something that obviously overwhelmed you." She snapped, imagining all the ways in which she could impale me. Alas, her Mother said they couldn't hurt the locals, of which I was included in. "I chose to tell you this as a good will gesture because soon, the others will figure out you remember everything. When they do, you won't be able pretend as if you don't know who Kol is or act like he wasn't ever apart of your life." The blonde warned, her voice dangerously high in volume.

"You wanted that." I countered. "You compelled me to forget about your family because you didn't want me in his life. Don't act like you care about him, or his relationships, now." I poured menace into my tone, ensuring to hold my ground for I had failed to that when I encountered the girl as a young vampire in Chicago.

Don't hurt the locals, she chanted. Don't hurt the——Rebekah stopped with the mantra, her face transforming into one with glowing red eyes and thick veins, uncaring that she was in a public place. "I would suggest you learn to respect your el——" She had started to shriek, the few people that were dotted around the Mystic Grill focusing their attention on her.

I yawned, flinging my bag over my shoulder. "Actually, I'd like to make my order to go, please." I called over to Matt Donovan.

✧࿐ ཾ✧

A.N: I had a world of fun playing with dynamic between Rebekah and Lottie. Rebekah had to hold back for her Mom and Lottie used that to advantage. But, Rebekah did do a good will gesture here. Since Klaus daggered her, the memories have been returning to Lottie because if that much came to her at once, it would killed or 'fried' her brain. If you have any other questions, I'll answer them gladly.

Did you have a favourite moment from this chapter?