January 1st is coming fast

another year has come and past

the resolutions that started strong

have many weeks ago, passed along

I vowed to swear a little less

but the past year had such fucking stress

I planned to have just a couple drinks a day

But after three, counting fades away

I vowed that I would quit smoking

I did, but then I took up toking

I promised less negative I would become

but being positive is such less fun

so on every count, I have failed

but this year, i have it nailed

this year I can't fail, the writing's on the wall

see, this year, I'm making no resolutions at all