• Melody •

• Santos beach •

* Dear Diary:

June 25, 2022

Six months to live.......

Isn't that a great way to start off a diary entry.

When the doctors told me about my diagnosis and the way that it effect me I had to do some major thinking.

It was thoughts that I wasn't even ready to be thinking about at the moment, but whether I denied it or not the fact was

I was dying.

I said plenty of times to just wake me from this madness, this dream isn't real

But In reality it was just as real as I was.

Diary what I was going to do, how could I explain this to the people I love?,
to my fans?

They all deserve the truth and what's going to be going on with me but I wasn't ready for anyone to know.

To be honest I don't even know what will be next in my lifetime, but one thing that I do know is that I want him to be apart of it, and the only issue is that

He's currently happy.

Diary closed *

I shoved my diary back into my bag as the sounds of the beach waves came rippling through.

The sun was definitely getting its shine on, as I shielded my face with a nice hat.

Taking in a deep breath which I wouldn't have ever thought to enjoy as much, I ramble though my lunch bag.

I knew after the news that I got hit with yesterday at the doctors office I just wanted to clear my mind.

Three months, it's already been three months of nothing but a pure roller coaster rides.

Also it's been three months since our breakup and I was still hung up about it.

Please don't ask me why.

I guess im just a fool for love.

As I bite down into an apple, the sound of his voice was in the distance.

" Shang?" I said lifting my head up just to only be disappointed.

It was a couple of guys walking by with a big speaker blasting his song that he recently drop with yung bleu, and 2 chainz called

Baddest.

Feeling embarrassed I shoved my now red face into my novel that I started to read.

" the Heart of Love, my mother love that book"

Not familiar with this stranger voice I slowly lifted my head up as my eyes never left the pages.

" who are you?" I said not even looking.

He let out a chucked before squatting down, while taking his hands to place on the book closing it shut.

Now he has my attention.

My eyes drifting onto his body first which I was amazed at what I was seeing, then they eventually made it to his face.

His features was very handsome as each part complemented the other.

I was speechless as our focus never broke.

" I'm sorry who are you?" I asked again but this time with a welcoming smile.

He smirk before extending his hand to me.

" I'm giveon satten, but my friends call me G, and who do I have the pleasure of speaking to"

I drop my head as I was feeling like this little kid who was meeting a crush for the first time.

This felt different, but in a good way I suppose.

" I'm melody, melody Tatum. I'm sure you heard a lot of stupid things about me and my relationship with Shang...."

He then stop me as he started to shake his head.

" with all due respect, I'm not the one to judge anyone about their past. Everyone has been through shit in their life but it's how you rise above it all... you know" he said.

Not wanting to agree I still nodded my head, because I knew he was telling the truth.

" what if you can't rise above it just yet, you don't want to let go of who hurt you because you fell so deep into this love with that person, then what? how can you just give up or let it go?"

He sigh before taking a sit on my beach towel.

" I'm sorry is this okay if I..." he jester at the towel and I wave him off

" your fine please be my guest"

" I've been though what you maybe experiencing right now way more than I can count, but what I can tell you is that it's hard to let go of the only love you ever love, and put your all into. That other person also have to know how much you also mean to them, and if they are so easily to just do you wrong, than who's to say that they won't doing it again, or a third time if giving the opportunity"

" I can't sit here and tell you how to go about your situation, you are a very smart, brilliant, intelligent young beautiful women who I can believe will make the right decision if it came down to what will bring her happiness in the end"

The more he talked the more I felt connected to him.

He was telling me things that I couldn't even tell myself because I didn't want to deal with the reality of it all.

Once again I wanted to be in denial of everything that's been going wrong in my life.

" tell me something" he asked while placing his arms over his knees.

" go on"

" what is it that brings you happiness?"

I chuckled while pulling some hair behind my ears.

My eyes now moved to glance over at how pretty the blue waters were.

I knew how to avoid a question, but when someone out of the blue talks to you, and this is what I been waiting for it was hard to just ignore him.

He was like another Shang.

He listened, he talk back with guidance and advices for me to take.

I was feeling him.

Was it to early?

" I don't know anymore" I sniffed.

I felt his body scoot over a little closer to mines, and I didn't bother to move over.

I accepted his presence, his scent, I accepted him into my own little bubble that I had over me.

"Melody. Even I know a little about you, and how you make some very beautiful music and your voice is lovely, i know there is something that brings you peace. So what is it?"

I just sat quiet trying to think.

" okay I'll go first. When I'm down, when I feel like that the world has turn its back on me, when I have family disputes, when I have relationships problems, hell any problems I turn to music"

I looked over at him as he was already in my face.

Smiling.

" you sing?" I said with a soft tone.

He lean back as if I was just suppose to have known before lifting back up.

I laughed at his craziness before he answer the question.

" I do. In fact I just uploaded a new song that I had recently did. It involves a break up that I had to go through in order to realize how strong I really am"

" can I hear it?... if.. if that's okay"

" yeah, yeah it's fine with me. Maybe it might help you find your closure if you sing about it"

I waited as he pulled out his phone and search for his song.

" you have a instagram I could follow you, I have a pretty big fanbase and..."

He turn his phone to me as my mouth stop talking.

I then looked back into this eyes before I playfully nudge him in the arm.

" wha...wait your really well known.. how?, well not saying that you can't be well known, but it just you..don't..". I started to just stumble on my words

He laughed before nodding as if he knew what I was trying to get at even though it was coming off embarrassing.

" it's cool I get that kind of reaction a lot. But, I have a few friends in the music business, and with my voice being.. let's just say different it took me far and I haven't looked back since"

" so this song that you did, was it for"

" an ex?" He beat me to it

I nodded.

" you can say that, but I grew from her and I'm better than I've ever been, and I'm ready to try something different... something new"

He looked into my eyes as I clear my throat

" it's nothing wrong with that I suppose"

Nervously twisting my hat string he broke his stare as he finished looking up the song.

" here, this is one out of many of my songs that I felt spoke to me the most, and I hope that what I created would help you find your voice to get over what you seem to be going through"

He then hit play as I lean down to listen.

Song: Lost Me

By: GIVEON

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

I was amazed at how unique his voice was.

Never had I heard a voice with so much soul inside it.

He was differently different from the rest of the guys I heard, and I see why his fanbase was the way it is now.

The more i listen to it and understanding the meaning the more I felt myself loving his voice.

His style.

" what you think of it so far?" He asked

Our faces was now inches apart and how vulnerable I was at the moment i watch as he was thinking the same.

We moved our heads closer, and closer until our lips locked.

The song continue to play and I felt fireworks going off.

He use his hand to cuff the side of my face as my body slid closer to his.

He pulled back as our nose was touching.

" If you want me to stop just say the word and I'll..."

Shutting him up I lean back for another kiss and he pulled me into his lap.

I straddle him as I wrap my arms around his neck.

The water waves started to come up on us as our Lower body was getting damp.

I jump from how cold it felt.

He giggle through the kiss and I let go.

" what?" I said

He shook his head before pulling the strands of hair back that fell in my face.

" your just beautiful that's all, and deserve the world"

I drop my head but he lifted it back up.

" what do you want?"

Biting my lower lip, I rub my hands down to his shorts and he raised a brow.

" I can give you that" he said with confidence.

" I was hoping that you would" I said.

I use my fingers to loosen up the strings on my bikini bottom.

They spilled over my thighs as he use his hands to massage them.

" your not afraid of heights are you"

" let's find out" I smirk

Using my extra towel that I had brought I cover over body's before I sat up and back down slowly.

Gasping out loud from the feeling of not feeling like this In a while he held onto me gentle as he move in a motion of comfort.

I loved that he wasn't rushing this feeling.

he took his time like a gentleman should and it was feeling good.

I moan softly as I rested my head on his shoulders trying to take all of him.

" what are we really doing?" I whimper.

I gentle bite his inner neck as he groan.

He then flip me to where now he was on top.

Good thing the beach was empty and the sun was starting to set.

" whatever that's giving you happiness" he replied.

Leaning down so that his weight was on mines we pick back up with our kissing.

The song soon started back over and as it played out we made love on the beach.

Which was now under the moonlight.