042:

Because of the lateness of their idea to get married, Ryan hadn't even considered asking his parents or brothers to try and come to the ceremony, promising to bring Melia to Australia for a reception shin-dig. Some of them had been happy, in a shallow sort of way, and some were downright skeptical. They'd seen what he had been like when he'd returned early from his mission. Obsessed with revenge!

They got married, in the living room of Richard and Tracy's home. Richard had a Justice of the Peace come out. Melia wore her church clothes, and Ryan wore jeans and a button down shirt.

Robert had declined witnessing, claiming he had to get back to be with Karen. Who could deny him that?

Megan had also declined witnessing, claiming she needed to get away more than anything, back to L.A.

Much to Melia's chagrin, her parents were more worried about Megan than they were about her! They'd even sent cousin Stevie back down there to check and make sure she made it okay. Ryan laughed. Megan was in much better shape than Melia, they just didn't realize it.

He pulled off his shoes and tossed them on the floor next to the bed, loosened his tie and kept the cell phone to his ear as he spoke to first one family member and then another. Melia's cottage was clean, he thought, did she clean it herself, or have someone come in? He opted for the latter and unbuttoned his shirt.

Melia was in the bathroom, having just nursed Hannah and put her down for bed. It was late, after midnight, and they were both tired. It had been a big day. Two baptism's, interviews, the wedding, and small gathering afterward, dinner and talking, toasting, fun.

She came out, and stood in the doorway, dressed in a long mint green lingerie nightgown, lacy and silky and he felt his reaction to her instantaneously. No matter what he thought or felt, she was still beautiful to him. She had one arm up, draped with the silky robe, her hair down and curled softly around her shoulders. Her eyes were open, staring at him steadily, and he felt the restraint he'd placed on himself rub him the wrong way. It would be so easy to let it all go right now....

He didn't get off the phone. He looked at her, stared at her hard, and then turned away.

Melia took a deep breath and continued to stand in the doorway. Something wasn't right, she thought. He hadn't been right all day, something wasn't happening the way she'd envisioned it. Hadn't she felt a confirmation out there while riding Red, and sitting on that rock, praying and repenting? Yes! She knew she had! A cloud of determination set her on her feet and moving toward him, but he sensed her and held up his hand for her to stop while he finished his conversation.

On our wedding night? She thought fuzzily. Really? I feel like I'm not the center of his attention tonight....

She cleared her throat, trying to give him a playful smile, but he didn't even look at her. He just held up his hand with his fingers pinched together for her to keep quiet. Melia stood there, her brows knit in consternation. Seriously? What was more important right now? Who else could he possibly be telling?

He clicked off and tossed his phone on the floor. He didn't look at her as he undid his pants and slipped out of them. This was it, this was the moment when she gave it to another man and became in her mind... an adulteress..... she shook herself, no, no, that was all wrong.... Ryan was her husband, legally joined, just the way she and Jared had been... twice.... She felt her throat choking up and closed her eyes. She meant to go through with this, meant to give it her all; she'd realized that out on the horse today, she needed to give it her all. Part of her repentance... She sat on the other side of the bed, leaned over and let her fingers run along his back.

Ryan pulled away, presumably to straighten the clothes he'd left on the floor.

"Who were you talking to?" Melia asked, to cover her concern at his pulling away, he hadn't even looked at her.

"Alison Angel." He answered. "One of my close friends." There was something in his voice that was slightly defiant, she frowned, biting her lip. But Ryan stood and gathered his clothing. "You know Mia, I'll bet you're real tired tonight. Why don't we just call it a night?"

Melia was stunned, didn't know what to say to that. This was their wedding night, weren't they supposed to....

She stared at him in confusion.

"It's been a long day, and I think I'm ready to turn in." he repeated, not catching her eye. "In fact, since you have to be up with the baby all night, I'll just sleep in the other room."

"Rye---" The word was out before she could stop it. "Wh--?" But he was out the door leaving her to sit there and shake her head.

What in the world?

She couldn't let this go!

This wasn't the way to start a marriage. Did he think she couldn't do it because of the baby? That wasn't true... she and Jared had.... She shook herself again. Jared couldn't be here right now, she had to focus on Ryan.... She felt a wave of immense confusion hit her and she tamped it down harshly, relegating her feelings for Jared to the deepest recesses of her mind. The rock/ horse moment came back with full force. It was up to her to change what was happening, to figure out how Ryan could say I do, and I love you and then...

She went to the door of the room next to hers and stood there watching as he pulled back the covers on the bed.

"Ryan, I don't think---" She began, but he only barely glanced at her and then clicked on his phone as it beeped at him. She heard his soft voice answering whoever had called him. She turned and went into the kitchen, trailing the green lingerie behind her.

Melia got a glass out of the cupboard and would have got water for herself, but she just stood there thinking with the water running. What was there to say to this situation? She had no idea.

*******