Nola Scott

Thursday had come quick and getting out of bed was harder than it had been the last couple of days. I was still mourning my loss at Worlds. It was getting easier but then I'd see something that reminds me of that day and my mood would shift drastically. Some days are easier than others. I'm trying not to be so hard on myself these days for the sake of my mental health.

I take time to do self-care and make sure my body, mind, and soul are at ease. I'm not perfect though, I have my difficult days just like everyone else.

As much as I didn't want to get out of bed, I did anyway because today was the King's last game of the regular season. I told Miles I would be there and I wasn't going to bail. Plus, Ember was going to come with me as well because of JT.

Yesterday was the last time I talked to Miles. He had opened up to me about a topic we'd gone over before. His birth parents. He told me that the thought had been eating at him for months and that it was only getting worse. Then when I was giving him advice about what to do, he hung up on me.

I thought maybe I was babbling too much and he got annoyed. He didn't call back or even text me. Until a couple of hours later. He told me he'd talk to me tomorrow after the game and that everything was fine. While I found it weird, I didn't nag him about the situation deciding to leave it alone. If it is anything to worry about, I'd probably get the info out of him today.

The game was an earlier one as it started at 3 pm and it was in Anaheim which is a good hour away with traffic. I decided to go on a small run this morning, hoping it would help me relieve any of the negative vibes I woke up with. After my run, I stopped by Renaissance Café to pick up a coffee before going home. When I made it back, Ember was doing her makeup in the kitchen. That was my cue to hurry up.

It was almost 11 pm but we wanted to get to the stadium a little early. After a quick shower, I changed into some light jeans, a silver and black Kings shirt, my white new balances, and a puffer for the cold stadium. I leave my hair down and do a quick, simple makeup look. "Ready," I say, stepping into the kitchen. Em sits on the couch and smiles when she sees me.

When we made it to the stadium, it was already filling up with people. We took our reserved seats and I was glad to see Kaitlyn, Tate's girlfriend, was present. She greeted me with a big hug and I introduced her to Ember. The three of us made girl-talk for the hour before the game started but then it was game time.

We all knew how important this game was to the team. The last part of their regular season hadn't been going as well as the first half. They were struggling to win games and Miles mentioned how badly they needed this win to go into the post-season with confidence. We were all nervous as the game went underway.

The first period was exciting for both sides. Both the Ducks and the Kings had scored a goal. Then the second period, the Kings scored two goals. Miles had one of those and Tate got the other. The Kings were up 3-1 and you could tell the team was giving it there all this time around. I could tell Miles was giving it all. My eyes were focused on him the entire game and I could tell the only thing that mattered to him right now was the game.

Everything else didn't matter. It made my cheeks flush when he'd take his helmet off and his jaw would be clenched. Despite being up by two, he would get angry when the other team would get even close to scoring. Him being in the zone was sexy. I was so into this man it made my blood burn. In a good way, of course.

Once the final period got underway, the fans in the stadium were loud. Both fans wanted their teams to win and you could hear that clearly. Hockey was a violent sport, something I never knew until I watched it. The number of times I've seen Miles aggressively shove other players was crazy. The occasional facial scars and bruises on his body also give it away.

The first goal of the period came fast, only a minute and a half in by the Ducks. Miles was livid, of course. He hit his stick against the ice so hard that it broke. "Oh shit," Kaitlyn says next to me. "Is he okay?" I ask her. Tate hands Miles his stick to use since he's currently on the bench. "I hope so," she says. The game resumes and it's a battle between the teams. It's back and forth for a good five minutes before the Kings gain the puck back.

JT skates quickly to the opposing side's goal and passes the puck off to a teammate when he struggles with a guy from the other team. The Kings keep it in their possession and it's finally passed to Miles. He takes the opportunity, skating quickly toward the goal. He shoots it in a couple of feet before he reaches the net and it goes straight past the goalie's legs. The crowd erupts in cheer and so do we. "That's how it's done," I say to myself as I clap.

The team celebrates shortly before the game begins again. Anaheim scores again a couple of minutes later, making the game 4-3. It's a close game and anyones game with only six minutes left. Everyone in the stadium is on their feet now, including us. We wait for something to happen. Both teams are attempting to score as much as possible but the puck keeps missing the net. The Kings are doing amazing with their defense and as long as they keep it up, they'll win.

With about two minutes left in the game, the Kings steal the puck and move it to the opposing side. The Ducks took out their goalie to add another player in and the team took advantage of this. Two players play defense on Miles but seem to forget about JT who skates over to the goalpost as quickly as possible. Tate gets the puck and swings it in his direction. It doesn't get any easier than JT thrusting the puck into the net for a clean goal that gets the crowd loud.

"Yes, babe! That's my guy!" Em shouts. She wraps her arm around mine and we cheer excitedly for Jay. "Okay, game! No more goals, please! Not from the Ducks at least," Kaitlyn says making me laugh. Luck is on our side because the Ducks can't catch up the last two minutes and the Kings win their final regular season game. Many of the Ducks fans have been exiting the stadium the last couple of minutes of the game.

Kings fans stick behind and cheer on the team until they're off the ice. After ten minutes of the team leaving the ice, the girls and I make our way over to where the guys said they'd meet us. JT and Tate come out together and aim straight for their girlfriends. "Miles will be out in a bit he's just talking to a couple of the guys," Tate tells me after he pulls away from Kait's hug. I nod, waiting for Miles to save me from being a fifth wheel.

He does.
Ten whole minutes later.

He emerges from the double doors, his face in a straight line and his jaw set tight. When his gray eyes find mine, a small smile pulls at his lips. I return it. "You played amazing tonight," I say as he approaches me. He gives me a quick side hug, rubbing my shoulder. Chills run up my back at his warm touch. "Thanks, Scott. Did you see my little temper tantrum?" he asks.

I laugh. "I saw. Need a new stick?" I tease. "I'm getting a new one, yeah. Also, what are you doing wearing black and silver? I thought you were a Ducks fan?" he quips. I can't help but smile. The ongoing joke that I'm a Ducks fan. He reminds me I told him I was a fan of there's every time he plays them. "Hey, we're gonna go to Caribbean Street, y'all coming?" JT asks. "Down," Tate replies first and Kait nods.

I look up at Miles who has an indecisive look on his face. "Think I'm gonna pass," he says then. I grab his arm forcing him to look at me. "You're gonna leave me as a fifth wheel!?" I tell him, teeth clenched. He furrows his brows and shakes his head. "You're coming with me so we can talk," he assures. "Oh," I turn to our friends, "I'll pass too. Thanks for the invite though."

Miles and I say our goodbyes and I let Em take my car for her and JT. I put the hoodie on my puffer up and throw on random sunglasses I find in my purse. We don't draw much attention when we leave and we're able to make it out of the stadium without any fan catching up to us. Miles says it happens more than you think. The drive home to his place is quieter than usual.

Something lingers in the air but I can't tell what it is yet.

When we enter the house, Miles brings me over to a specific couch and sits me down. I don't know the reason he passed up on dinner. At first, I thought it was maybe because he didn't want to be seen with me out in public. Everyone knows JT and Ember are dating and Tate and Kait have been together for a long time. Then there's Miles and I, two single people. There was bound to be rumors that I'm his plus one aka his new girlfriend.

I know he doesn't like when the media creates rumors about him which is why he doesn't even give them a crumb of insight into his personal life. It's why I put on my sunglasses and pulled my hoodie up. Just in case anyone was around to snap a photo of me, they really wouldn't be able to tell who I am. From the looks of it now though, it does look like he wants to talk. His quietness in the car also makes me worry.

"Be honest with me. How are you feeling today?" Miles starts the conversation. "I feel fine. I had a lot of fun at the game. You did an amazing job today, Miles. I'm proud of you," I admit. I want him to know how great he played tonight. He's been so hard on himself this past week and with everything going on his head, I just want him to know how great he's doing.

Even if I have to tell him a thousand times.

"Thank you," he says. "And I'm sorry for hanging up so randomly yesterday. I was going to tell you more about it today which is why I passed on dinner. Sorry if you wanted to go." I shake my head quickly. So he did want to talk. "Talk to me." I scoot closer to him and he breathes in sharply. The look on his face worries me and after what he told me yesterday, I'm starting to imagine how much this is really eating at him.

"I was just getting home when I said the last thing I said to you and my mom was at my house. I didn't even know she was there but she heard what I said. I had to explain myself obviously.." he explains. My mouth gapes open slightly at his confession. "So she heard you say you wanted to find your birth parents?" I clarify, remembering the last thing he said to me before the call ended. He nods slowly.

Oh, God. I know that's not how he wanted that to happen.

"What happened after that?" I ask. "What did she say?" He rubs the back of his neck. "It was a tough conversation, just like I imagined. But they told me who my birth parents are, Scott. Hell, my mom even helped me reach out to my birth mother to arrange...plans, I guess," he says. My eyes widen again. I'm in as much shock as he was yesterday I'm sure.

"It was all that easy?" I ask. He shakes his head. "Oh, it wasn't easy trust me. I tried not thinking about it today because it was our last game but it was hard. It's like....all I can think about. My mom texted me in the morning saying she hasn't responded back yet," he explains. I nod, taking in his words. All of this happened in the span of a couple hours and I had no clue. I wish I could have been there for him.

"Who are they? If I may ask, of course. Your birth parents," I demand. He lets out a weak chuckle. "Turns out...I only have a birth mom." My brows pull together in confusion at his words. "What does that mean? She doesn't know who your birth dad is?" I question. Miles sighs and shakes his head, looking down at his lap. "No..." he pauses. "He died before I was born, Nola."

My mouth gapes open again slightly. Oh. My. God. "I'm so s-" Miles doesn't let me finish my sentence. "Crazy, right? I was never going to have the chance to meet him." He sounds sad about the fact but it makes sense. I know how much Miles has been wanting to find out who his birth parents are and finding out that one of them passed away has to be disappointing.

"Tell me about them," I tell him, patting his lower thigh. He looks over at me and his gray eyes sulk. "I don't know much about either of them, it's why my mom told me to reach out. Besides their names," he tells me. "What are their names?" I push. He sighs sadly making me frown slightly. "My birth mom's name is Bethany James and my birth fathers is...was Ryle Grayson."

My blood runs cold at the mention of that name. Suddenly, my whole body is frozen and I think I must be going crazy. There is absolutely no way he just said his name. "You said Ryle Grayson?" I blurt out, my voice higher than usual. He nods his head. "Sounds familiar, right?" he asks me. My mind reverts back to the ice skating clinic. The one where Miles and I mended our rocky relationship. The start of everything up until this point.

There was a little boy there. His name was Ryle.

"Ryle from the ice skating clinic. The little boy who I asked you to help," I tell him. He's the reason Miles finds the name familiar. "Oh, yeah. No wonder I swore I'd heard that name somewhere," Miles mumbles. In my case, I know the name Ryle from my mom. The story of her first love and best friend who passed away when she was young. How is it even possible that he's Miles' dad? The name Beth James sounds familiar but not as familiar as Ryle Grayson.

Miles did mention a while back that his birth parents were originally from Miami. The city my mom had gone to college in until her senior year when she transferred to Oak Hill. Is it possible that this Ryle Grayson is my mom's Ryle Grayson? The similarities are too high for it not to be. The thought makes chills run down my spine.

"Whatever happens, if you want me to, I'll be there," I promise him, grabbing his hand from his lap. His cold fingers make me shiver even more. He looks down at our hands but doesn't make an effort to pull away from my touch. "You'd go to Miami with me?" he asks. "You went to Stockholm for me and I really needed you there after everything that happened. So yes, I'll be there," I say.

Our eyes meet, burning into each other. Being around him hurts sometimes. All I want to do is kiss him and hold him. I never knew just how much holding in your feelings can hurt. If I could protect my feelings and distance myself in hopes that these feelings would fade, I would.

But it's hard to stay away from him.
And I honestly think staying away from him would hurt even more.

He squeezes my hand lightly and nods. "Thanks, Scott," he says in almost a whisper. "Yeah. I'm excited to see you in the playoffs by the way. How exciting," I tell him, trying to change the subject to something lighter. He moves his hand from under mine to run it through his thick, dark hair. A pang of disappointment hits but I don't let it show in my features. "Who are you playing again?" I ask.

"Winnipeg. Shouldn't be too hard," he replies. "You guys will do great," I sing-song. I've never been a hockey fan in my life but the thought of them going into the postseason excites me. For Miles's sake, I hope they get to the Stanley Cup Finals. I know how much he wants that so I want it for him too. And JT, of course.

"I think we have a good chance at-" His voice is cut off by the sound of a notification from his phone. He looks down at it and picks his phone up quickly. His eyes scan over his phone frantically and when he looks up at me, his gray eyes are widened. His chest rises and falls faster as he hands me his phone. Curiously, I take it to see what has him so frazzled.

His phone is opened up on a Facebook private message.

Chloe Dempsey: Hello.

Bethany James, I'm not sure if you remember me. I found your FaceBook page and wanted to reach out to you in regards to my son. It's been more than two decades but I want to thank you again for giving me the best thing I could ask for. I don't know if you remember but you told my husband and I that you would be willing to meet my son if he ever asked to in the future. Well, that time has come. Just recently, he asked about his birth parents and I gave him the little information I have regarding you and your late ex-partner, his birth father. There's a specific reason I'm reaching out to you and not him but he would really appreciate meeting you one day. If there's any way we'd be able to make this possible, just send me a text back. If your wishes have changed and you choose to decline, I understand and will let him know. Truly, thank you - Chloe Dempsey xx

Bethany James: Chloe Dempsey. How could I ever forget? Thank you for reaching out. After a couple of years, I never expected to get this message but here it is. While it has been quite a long time, I stand by my word. Meeting your son would be an honor. I understand from your profile you live in Los Angeles now. Correct me if I'm wrong. I'm still in Miami. I can make it out there but if he wants to come to Miami, that would be fine too. Let me know.

It only takes me about a minute to read both texts and I feel my hands become shaky. You'd think this was my birth mother. "Wow," is the only word that leaves my mouth. I have so many questions but I can't seem to let any out. "Are you going to reply?" I ask. He shakes his head. "This is my mom's account, I can't." Miles is about to put his phone down when it starts ringing. It's his mother.

He answers quickly and puts it on speakerphone. "Hello?" A couple of seconds later, Chloe's voice fills the speaker. "Oh, hi, honey. I thought you'd be resting after your game. I didn't think you would pick up but I'm glad you did," she says. "Yeah, I'm home resting, ma. Just not asleep. Everything okay?" he asks.

It takes her a minute to say something back. "Yes," she pauses shortly, "Bethany responded to my message on Facebook. She's willing to meet you and wants to know if you want to fly down to Miami or have her come up here. We could buy her a plane ticket-"

"I can go tomorrow," Miles interrupts his mom. My eyes widen slightly. "We don't have practice for the next three days so this will be my only available time before playoffs start," he explains. Chloe stays quiet again. "Are you sure honey? Waiting until the seasons over can be arranged, I'm sure," she offers. Miles shakes his head despite her not being present. "Mom, I'll go tomorrow. Waiting another two months is jokes. Ask her if tomorrow or the day after work, please."

I grab his hand and he looks at me. "Are you sure?" I mouth. He nods his head quickly. "O-okay. I'll let her know. Did you want me to come with you?" she asks. Miles closes his eyes like he's in pain. "No, mom. It's fine. I want to do this ...alone. I'll be okay," he tells her. Chloe is silent again. "Do you need anything from me, honey?"

"I'm okay, ma. Just let me know what happens, please. I love you," Miles says. "I will. Love you too." When he ends the call, he gets up from the couch and paces back and forth. "Miles-"

"You're coming with me, right? I'm getting us our plane tickets tonight if she agrees," he says frantically. I can see how anxious this is making him.

"Are you sur-"
"Nola, you said you would come with me."
"I know that. I'm just asking are you su-"
"Alright fine, don't come with me. I'll just ask Tate."
"No, Miles. I just want to know if you-"
"Why so many questions?! You don't have to co-"

"Hey," I cut him off and walked over to him, grabbing both arms to hold him still. "Miles, I'm coming with you. Just calm down, okay?" His gray eyes hold so much emotion and his chest rises and falls faster than usual. I put one hand over his heart and practically feel it hitting his chest. "I can't breathe," he chokes out. Nodding quickly, I carefully pull him over to the couch and place him down.

I open his legs with my knee and move his hair out of his face. "Just breathe, hey, look up at me. Slow breaths, in and out. In and out." He tries to slow his breathing and I encourage him. "Good. You're okay. Everything's okay," I remind him. He grabs onto the back of my leg and I freeze in place. His breaths are becoming slower which is good but he doesn't say much. "Breathe," I repeat.

Miles rubs his thumb against the thick fabric of my jeans. His touch feels like it can burn through my clothes. "I'm okay," he finally says, his voice a bit hoarse now. His words calm something in me so I take a step back. I don't even notice that his leg is stretched out which makes me trip. Miles catches my arms and from one second to the other, I'm sitting on his lap.

Oh. My. Gosh.

Our faces are only a couple of inches from each other and I can feel his breath against my cheek. His gray eyes suddenly look darker than usual. "I'm so sorry," I apologize, standing up quickly. I can feel the blood rushing to my cheeks as I take my place respectfully next to him. "That's okay," he mumbles.

When I glance at him, he looks a lot younger than usual. I don't know if it's because of the frown on his face but he looks vulnerable. "Can you stay? Until she replies, at least," Miles asks me, his voice soft. I nod, scooting closer to him on the couch. I wrap my arm around his shoulder and lean my head on his.

Being this close, I can feel every breath he takes. Thankfully his breaths have slowed and he seems a lot calmer. I can tell he's still on edge but that makes sense. We sit in comfortable silence for about ten minutes until Miles's phone rings. Slowly, he picks it up and reads whatever is on it before showing it to me.

Chloe Dempsey: He has a busy schedule these next two months because of his job. The soonest he can come out is tomorrow or the day after that. Would that be okay? I'm aware it's soon but with his schedule, it's the only free time he can manage.

Bethany James: It is soon, but it works for me. How about the day after tomorrow? It'll give him more time to catch a flight. He can show up at any time, I'll be home all day just in case.

Bethany attaches her address to the bottom of the message and seconds later, his mom sends him a screenshot of the messages. Miles looks at me then. "You don't have to come with me," he says. I swallow the sudden lump in my throat again. Of course, I want to be there. It's just...weird. He doesn't know that I know who his birth parents are. All I think about right now is my mom.

I have to tell my mom.

"I'm coming with you," I assure him. He looks deeply into me like he's trying to figure out if I don't want to be there. "I should get us tickets, then. I'll be right back," he tells me before getting up and disappearing into another room. Once he's gone, I pull out my phone.

Nola: hey mom, how are you?

I'm not planning on telling her now. Not even before we go to Miami. I want to be able to be here for Miles and then we'll worry about that whole other part later. But mom is my ride-or-die and knowing that she has no clue about this makes me hurt for her. It's been over twenty years and she has a whole other life now.

She's married to the love of her life and has five kids. Mom has lived a lot of life since Ryle passed away but I know he'll always be a part of her. After all, no one ever truly forgets the first boy who broke their heart.

Mommy: I'm good, sweetie. What are you up to? Coming to visit soon?

I decided not to tell mom I'm going to Miami tomorrow. I don't know what reason I could come up with for going to Miami for two days with Miles.

Nola: hanging out with a friend. sure, i'll visit in a couple of days. got plans the next three or so days. miss you and love you, just wanted to check up on you.

Mommy: Yay. Love and miss you, baby. Have fun and be careful.

Once moms final text comes through, Miles walks back into the living room. "I got them, five pm tomorrow. Is that okay?" he asks. I nod as he sits down next to me again. "Thanks for joining me," Miles adds. "You were there for me during an important time so of course I'm going to be there for you," I reply.

"You know I never thought I'd say this but I feel like you've become one of my best friends these last couple of months, Scott," he tells me. I smile. Being friend zoned by Miles is something I'm familiar with so I don't even try fighting it anymore. As much as that part stings, being close to him means a lot to me. I trust this guy more than a lot of people in my life.

He makes me feel safe and secure. On days I don't feel like getting out of bed or even talking to another human being, Miles changes that. He's the only person who can get me out of my slumps and push me to be and do better. What else could I ask for in a friend?

"Yeah, you too. And look, everything's going to be okay tomorrow. We've come as far as knowing she wants to meet you. What else can go wrong? Even if, God forbid, anything does, I'll be there," I assure Miles, hand on heart. "It'll be okay. You'll be okay." He nods and I can tell that he trusts me which is all I can ask for.

I stay for a while longer and we talk about things that aren't tomorrow and hockey. He wasn't his usual self but I understood. Keeping him company was all I wanted to do anyway. JT and Ember returned about two hours later and turns out one of them had a little too much to drink.

"You're heavy!" Em shouted from the hall. Miles and I turned toward her voice with brows furrowed. They weren't in our sight yet but we could hear JT laughing and Em groaning. "I hate you," she grumbled and they finally popped into view. Em dropped JT on the coach. His blonde hair was all over the place and his eyes were very droopy. He was definitely drunk. "Is my car okay?" I ask.

I trust Em driving, I just want it vomit-free. "Yes. But his bathroom probably won't be. Let's go," Em responds, rolling her eyes. I look over at JT who looks crazy and Miles who has no sort of expression on his face. Oh, gosh. A drunk JT isn't what Miles needs right now. "Uhm," I say, looking at my blonde friend. He looks like he's about to come down from whatever high he's on. "I'm gonna stay the night Em. Can you take my car?" I ask her.

Her brows furrow a bit but she nods quickly. "Sure thing. Let me know if you want me to pick you up!" She doesn't even give me another second to respond as she runs out of the house. I sigh and look over at Miles again. He looks at JT like he wants to help him but doesn't at the same time. "I got him. You go get some rest," I tell Miles. My voice has him turning his head toward me.

"Are you sure?" he asks me. I nod and begin to stand from the couch. "I'll tell Em to pick me up tomorrow morning. I can also pick you up tomorrow so that we can leave my car at the airport instead of yours?" I suggest. The corner of his mouth lifts just slightly. "Yeah, sounds good. You know where the guest room is right?"

"Yes." He nods and stands up as well. Looking at JT one more time, he shakes his head. "Let me know if you need my help," he mutters, patting the small of my back before turning around to go upstairs. "Night," I tell him. When I look over at JT, he's already passed out. That's not a good sign. "Jay, "I say walking over to him. He doesn't even flinch until I start to shake him awake. "Go away, Em. I don't like you," he rants.

I roll my eyes and smack his thigh. "It's Nola. Now get up so I can get you to bed!" His eyes open at the sound of my name. "Nola Scott?" he questions. "Yes, Nola Scott, you loof," I tease and he begins to stand on his feet. He stumbles back a bit but I grab his arm. With his free arm, he extends his hand toward me. "Huge fan," he slurs. I laugh and pull him slowly up the stairs. "Let's get you to bed, big guy."

After struggling to carefully get him upstairs for ten minutes, JT throws himself on his bed and groans. "I missed my bed," he mumbles. I bring over the trashcan from his bathroom and place it by the bed. He lays on his side willingly so I don't have to do much more besides take his shoes off his feet. "Can I get naked?" he asks me. I furrow my brows. "Please don't."

He nods and lays his head back down. Making myself comfortable, I take a seat at the end of his bed. I'm only going to stick around long enough to make sure that he's okay and doesn't choke on his own vomit. "You played really well today," I tell him. With his eyes closed, he smiles. "We're gonna be Stanley Cup Champions soon," he slurs.

"Uh-huh," I agree with him. His eyes open slowly and he looks over at me. "Are you sleeping in here with me?" he questions looking genuinely confused. "No, I'm just waiting until you fall asleep," I tell him. He puts his hand over his heart. "You're so sweet. I love you." Smiling, he closes his eyes again. I giggle at his words, patting his covered legs.

My phone buzzes in my pocket and I pull it out.

Em: can you check on jt for me? don't want him to choke on his vomit and die but i can't stand him right now.

My brows furrow in confusion.

Nola: i stayed to take care of him, he's fine. a lot going on with miles and i didn't want him to deal with jt's shenanigans. you guys ok?

Em: he said something that triggered me. i don't want to get into it, talk about it later. what time should i pick you up?

Hm. I wonder what he said. I could tell she was bothered by him earlier but I figured it was just because he was drunk.

Nola: soon as you wake up pls. just call me when ur here.

Em likes my final message. When I glance back up, soft snores slip out of JT and I take this as my sign to get some rest myself. Miles' room is on the way to the guest room and I can't help but look. The creek at the bottom of the door is dark so I'm assuming he's already asleep or trying to sleep.

I know he overthinks a lot so he's most likely awake. Still, I don't bother him any longer. He needs alone time to process his thoughts as do I.

My mind is in a whirlwind from everything I learned today. It's a chilling thought knowing the man whom I have feelings for is the son of my mother's late first love. Out of every single person in the world, it's Miles who makes my heart skip a beat. I don't even know what to make of that.

Should I tell Miles? If so, when? Before he meets his birth mother? After? Fuck, I have no clue.

If I wait, he'll think I was hiding it from him. If I don't, would it make him feel even more stress than he's feeling now? Would he even care? I can literally feel my brain working overtime thinking about all these outcomes.

Will it change anything? Will we change?

As I lay in bed, my mind turns and turns for hours. I don't even know what time I fall asleep but when I wake up to Ember's call the next morning, my eyes burn. "Outside," she tells me. I hang up and check the time on my phone. It's nine am. I have time to do things before I have to come pick up Miles again in a couple of hours.

Grabbing my shoes, I slip them on quickly and fix my messy hair in the mirror quickly before making my way downstairs. I try my best to keep quiet in case the boys are asleep but when I reach the bottom, I hear someone in the kitchen. Considering little JT was drunk last night, I assume it's Miles.

Peeking my head into the kitchen to see if I'm right, Miles turns when he hears me. He's only wearing black joggers and socks. Oh, lord. Eyes up, Nola. "Morning, Scott," he greets. "Headed out?" I nod my head, feeling my cheeks get warm. I'm not even looking at his abs! He smiles a bit but I hope it's not because he notices my schoolgirl blush.

His aroma doesn't feel as gloomy as yesterday's so I guess that's a good thing. "I'll see you in a bit?" I ask, clearing my throat. He nods once and I smile at him before heading out. Em sits in the passenger seat now so I'm assuming she wants me to drive back. I hop into the car and she smiles, wide awake at nine am. "Good morning, blondie."

"Morning, you look cute," I compliment, looking down at her cute little outfit. It's a baby blue jumpsuit, Ugg's, and a sweater. Her hair is in two braids and she doesn't wear any makeup but she never needs it. "Thanks ya. I went on a morning run before I picked you up," she tells me. I don't remember the last time she went on one of those.

Ember hates running. Cardio isn't her forte. The only time she goes out on runs is when she has a lot on her mind. Then it clicks. "So are you gonna tell me what happened with JT last night?" I ask, pulling out of Miles' driveway. Em doesn't look at me but her smile turns into a straight line. "It's a long story."

I sigh. "Tell me now."