Pretending to be a Crystal Gem ended up being easier than I'd expected.

I wore what he chose.

I acted naive and innocent, but that's because I mostly was.

I let him guide and begin to shape me, or at least I let him think that.

"So." School had been let out and Steven was leaning just outside of the girls room. I was fixing my lip gloss and tossing the curls that Spinel and Pearl had put into my hair.

Pearl and Spinel were "tutoring", so it was just us now. I was nervous at first, but having his undivided attention made it easier to find his soft spots.

"Pearl told me you have a thing for Hazel."

My heart stopped beating as an icy feeling flooded through my chest. I remembered how panicked and scared the other girls had been, he wouldn't hit me right? I tried to sound humorous, but it came out in a squeak. "She did?"

He rested his hands over the doorframe and leaned in to catch my eyes with his. "She did." He watched for a reaction, so I gave him nothing. After a moment, he cleared his throat. "You know, I could talk to him if you want me to."

This time I couldn't help my reaction. "You would do that?"

"I've gotta keep my girls happy, don't I? Just don't forget who you belong to." His gaze bored into me until I turned and walked up to him shyly.

His massiveness still made me feel apprehensive, but I pressed my hands lightly against his chest. His heart picked up in pace and I smirked to myself. "Of course, Steven."

He smiled down at me so sweetly my heart started back up again. "Good."

I started to back away but he held me close, studying my face. "You're so pretty, Berry. I feel like you don't get told that enough."

The all too familiar feeling rushed through me, but it settled between my legs this time. "Thank you."

"You know you can drop out of the Crystal Gems at any time, right?" He murmured.

My eyes widened. "No."

"Well, you can. I see things in you that would make a man like me happy, but I also see things in you that would outrank the others." He spoke so sure of himself that I grew flustered.

"Really?" His hand found the side of my face and he nodded.

"I like having you around though." His lips were so close I wanted to close the distance and run and hide.

"I like having you around too." A lie. Or was it actually?

'It has to be a lie. That's the only way this is going to work, Connie,' My brain reminded me sternly.

He smiled and leaned forward another fraction. "Your eyes tell me different stories than your mouth does. Why is that?"

I've always been told I have expressive, doe eyes. And now without my glasses gone I could guess it was heightened. "You make me nervous." The truth.

The chuckle he made gave me jelly legs. "Good." He tried to pull away, but looked down at my hands. I hadn't realized I was clutching onto his jacket.

I let go, spreading my fingers and turning my back to him.

"Don't turn your back to him. Ever."

I flipped back around. "Sorry. I just thought I was going to sneeze."

His eyebrows knitted together, looking at me with disbelief before he burst out laughing. "Right. I'll see you tomorrow, yeah?"

I nodded and blinked and he was gone. I peaked out the door and gasped.

He was completely gone.

The car ride home was uneventful, even with my mind swimming with thoughts of how close he was. I tried the wrong key to the door four times before realizing and pushed inside, breathless.

The quietness gave me a bit of solace as I started to make a salad. I couldn't eat something heavy with the way I was feeling.

My throat felt like it was closing. I wanted to be touched more by him. My thighs were trembling.

Something I noticed about him was that while he was touchy, it was never laced with affection. He touched the way I would touch my microwave or my pencil: this thing is mine and it will do what I command it to.

Why did that make me feel something? I wanted to pretend the way he touched me was different, but I knew deep down it wasn't probably wasn't. I had to come out on top, not him. I reminded myself of that fact over and over as I ate.

The next morning, I woke up troubled but refreshed.

I put on something I knew he would really like, and let my hair hang straight. I'd started putting a hair masque on between shampooing and conditioning and it was working wonders for my hair. For being non human, Pearl and Spinel sure knew a lot about how to make me look good.

At lunch I noticed both Pearl and Spinel were dazed and quiet, leaving Steven to do most of the talking. "What are you doing after school, Berry?"

I smiled, "Nothing at all before and after cheer." I really should be studying. "Why?"

"No reason. I was just curious." He lifted a hand, eyes turning that shimmery pink again as a wall erected itself behind him (he didn't even look) and someone walked smack into it. Holy shit. I'd never seen him do anything like that before. I'd almost forgotten he was a gem. "You're really going to walk by without saying hi? Rude."

I looked up to see Hazel chuckling. "Hey, man."

Steven turned to face him and leaned back against the table. "Don't 'hey man' me. How are you?"

"Oh you know, just actually focusing on school this year," He laughed shyly. "Hey, Connie."

I waved politely, expecting to feel a rush. "Hi, Hazel."

"Hey, don't go flirting with my girls when I'm right here, you're going to hurt my feelings," Steven teased.

Hazel threw his head back dramatically. "You've always been such an attention whore, you know that?"

"You're one to talk wearing my old shirt."

His old shirt? Wow, they really did date. I glanced at Pearl and Spinel, who immediately pulled out their phones and started texting.

Hazel puffed out his chest, causing the yellow star to curve against his broad chest. "Is that why you're not allowing me to eat my lunch in peace?"

The wall thickened. "You know, cheerleading auditions are tonight."

Hazel snorted, "What? Like you even have to audition. You're overpowered, man. That's why they won't let you on the football team."

"Guilty as charged," He acknowledged proudly. "You know, my Connie will be there too. Doesn't she have the perfect frame for a flyer?"

Hazel nodded and sized me up. I smiled awkwardly, I'd never noticed how tiny he seemed compared to Steven. "Yeah, she's certainly small enough."

"I'm 5'4. Entirely average, but not short." I giggled and tipped my head. "You're only 6'4, barely a foot above me."

"Hey, a foot is a foot." He told me through a chuckle. His eyes dropped back to Steven who was staring at the star. "Can I go eat my lunch now?"

"Of course." He raised his hand and pressed it against the wall. It disappeared, being replaced by sparkles floating in the air. "Don't be a stranger, Nutella," He called after him.

Hazel turned to walk backwards and flipped him off with both hands over a huge smile. "That's the plan, Pink Diamond."

Shiva, did everyone know but me?

Steven turned back around to regard me. "There. You're welcome. I got your boytoy thinking about you in a short skirt." My eyes darted to the jock table where he was joking around with his friends.

With Stevens permission, I'd started talk to him a bit more every day but something was wrong.

He was sweet, and funny and smart. A perfect match to myself. I enjoyed his company, even if he was actually kind of sucky at math.

"Are you ready for tryouts tonight?" Steven dragged me from my stupor and I nodded.

But he didn't quite make me feel that flood anymore. It felt like I got downgraded from an infatuation to a simple crush. I wanted to want to date him, but my body had other attractions.

Steven had started teaching me balance and coordination, while Pearl taught me how to be graceful, and Spinel taught me pep. There was no way I was going to make the team, but it would be fun to try.

"Good," Steven praised when I completed a series of difficult things at mid level at best. "We'll do a bit more practice after school before we go then. Loosen you up a bit."

I blushed. "Come again?"

The corner of his lip rose. "I said, tonight after school, I'm going to loosen you up. Help relax you so you aren't so nervous."

"Grool," I mumbled.

"Grool?" Pearl asked with a wrinkle of her nose.

"Is that some kind of human thing?" Spinel scrunched up her face at me.

"N-no. I meant to say 'cool' but then I started to say 'great' and..." I trailed to a stop when they all gave me blank faces.

"Well then," Steven chuckled. "Grool."