Graham

Waking up the morning after that whole ordeal proved to be difficult. I couldn't find it in me to move. I think Damon snuck back to the guest room in the early morning. He didn't want to leave me after my two separate tearful confessions. That's when it hit me. Oh God, I came out to my mother last night. I slap my hands over my face and run them down in an attempt to rid the embarrassment of having Damon watch that whole thing go down. Fuck, he probably didn't need or want to be there for that.

After another twenty minutes of debating on whether I should actually get up or not, I peel myself from the mattress and slowly but surely make my way down my parent's long and winding staircase. Damon is already sitting at the table enjoying a coffee as he has a conversation with my mum about something or the other. I sit down next to him and lean my head on the table, completely exhausted from all the crying I had done last night. He smiles at me and grabs my thigh under the table. I jump and begin to cough, sputter, and blush as he just cackles away. I glare daggers at him as my mom leans on the kitchen counter and smiles fondly at us.

That's when Leslie Coxon walks in. I don't miss the scoff he sends my way. My mother sends him a dangerous look as I curl in on myself. Damon gently grabs my hand and squeezes it this time. I make sure he receives my grateful expression. Jacob and Eleanor soon follow my fathers arrival. Damon and I's hands stay tightly clasped together only hidden by the Christmas themed table cloth.

"Are you two poofs interested in doing a good old Christmas eve bar hop tonight?" Jacob asks as he butters a piece of toast. I can see Damon roll his eyes and I can't even stop myself from rolling mine as well.

My mother abruptly drops the spatula she had been using to flip the bacon and pinches Jacob's ear before pulling him out of the room. This house is quite old though and the walls are thin so we heard everything that was said.

"What did I tell you about being nicer to Graham? This is the first Christmas he's been home in a very long time and if you don't get you're act together he is probably never coming back. Now, you go in there and apologize to your brother and his friend or you will get nothing but a lump of coal for christmas, you hear me?" Her tone is sharp as a knife. I always forgot how scary she could be. Eleanor snickers and cringes in my direction which makes me laugh. I know exactly what that expression means but I haven't seen it since childhood. 'At least it's not us'.

Jacob comes back looking guilty as ever and sits between Eleanor and our father. "I'm sorry for calling you two poofs. The offer to go out tonight still stands." He sighs.

I look over to Damon to try and get an idea of what we should do but he looks just as conflicted as I feel. On one hand, Jacob is a complete asshole and I can see the whole night being filled with him attempting to cheat on his wife and try to set me up with any girl who looks my way. On the other hand, he's my big brother and I haven't seen him in forever. I want to catch up with him but I'm not really sure I can do the whole bar socializing thing.

Then I see my mothers face. She looks tired but glad to have all her babies back home. She has this hopeful look that somehow it will be different now and we will all get along. Goddammit.

"I guess we could go out for a bit." I shrug as if it's no deal. Damon squeezes my hand again and I look over to see just how surprised he is. That's growth, baby.

The rest of the day is filled with me and Damon helping my mother prepare dinner and Damon slapping my ass when he knew no one was looking. Every single time I would look back at him and glare but he would just shoot me this goofy smile, showing off his wonky teeth and I knew I couldn't be mad. One by one more family members arrived and the but slaps thankfully became few and far between due to just the sheer amount of people in the house. They were still there though. I don't know what's been up with Damon. He's been so handsy lately. Not that I'm complaining, I just still think I'm not ready for that kind of stuff. God, I wish I could just man up and let him get it over with. It's not like I haven't thought of it before. I think of it quite frequently actually. Just, whenever I get close to doing it something in me freezes up and scares me half to death. I feel bad for Damon having to deal with me.

None of the guests know who I am, seeing as I'm now a full grown man and  the last time I had been seen around here I was still a gawky teen. My whole extended family keeps eyeing Damon and I up and I can fully say that it's making me quite nervous.

By the time we finish up with the food, multiple tables are set up and everyone is complaining about how hungry they are. I look at the clock to see that it's only 5pm. Jesus christ people, have some patience. You're getting free food.

Damon and I make sure to sit further away from the main table as an attempt to escape some of the awkward glances and heated political conversations. I think the Coxon Christmas dinner is where my fear of social gatherings cam to be to be honest. It only makes the most sense. This many people being in one room is making me feel uneasy.

"And who are these to young men over here?" My aunt jenine asks as she sits across from Damon and I.

"Your n-nephew, G-Graham." I stutter out. Shit. I have been so good about the whole stuttering thing. There's just so many people here, it's making my head spin. "A-And this is m-my roommate, D-Damon.".

"OH my dear God! Graham! Where have you been!" She shrieks and runs over to my side of the table before she envelopes me in a suffocatingly tight hug. I go stiff and Damon looks concerned for me but is also trying his best not to laugh. 'Thanks Jerk' I mouth at him. He just takes a sip of his water to stifle his laughs.

"I've b-been in London." I wheeze as she let's go of me. I can still hear Damon snickering as she continues to try and converse with me.

"And what are you doing down there?" I have to resist the urge to role my eyes. She knows exactly what I do in London. She just wants an excuse to downplay my career.

"I'm an a-artist. R-Remember Jenine?" I ask and she throws her head back with a laugh. I look over and Damon is not enjoying himself anymore. His eyes are narrowed right at her. He may know I hate my are and he may even dislike it himself, but the second someone tries to pull something like this he's by my side ready to support me.

"What are you making, peanuts?" She laughs harder now and Damon is stabbing so aggressively at his salad that I'm worried he might break the plate. I gently slide my hand over his knee and I can feel his leg bouncing up and down vigorously. He relaxes a bit the longer I keep my hand where it is though.

"I- well. Uhm. Y-You see-" I stammer. Damon comes to my rescue and cuts me off before I can make any more of a fool of myself.

"He makes amazing money. Enough to pay for a really nice apartment in London Square. Are you aware of how high the cost of living is down there. He was paying that rent alone before I needed a place to stay too." Damon huffs. I don't add in that I'm technically still paying for the entirety of rent but I have enough money to go around unlike what my aunt thinks. She did shut up after Damon's big spiel on my income. The rest of dinner is spent in silence at our table.

After what might have been the most awkward meal of my life, we all move to the living room. The atmosphere had shifted from hectic to quite chill actually. Everyone was having pleasant conversations around the fireplace. I had to physically stop myself from leaning onto Damon and falling asleep on his shoulder. It was just that cozy.

The coziness and warmth was ripped away as Jacob came and stood over Damon and I who were sitting on the floor. "Ready for the bar?" He asks. I really, really did not want to go, but mom wants us to get along... so I get up and grab my jacket. Damon follows us as we all bid a farewell to the sea of mine and Jacob's family members.

The car ride was kind of the worst. Jacob put on rap music and sang along while I tried to keep catching glimpses of my love in the backseat. The bar itself was a lot busier than I thought it would have been on Christmas eve. Drunk couples staggered around and yelped and yelled to the shitty band on stage. Damon, Jacob, and I paid no mind to anything but the bar. Jacob kept ordering rounds of shots for the three of us and after just one I had already felt like I was going to vomit. That didn't stop him from ordering more. And more. And more, and more, and more.

It isn't actually as bad as I thought it was going to be, hanging out with Jacob and all. We talked a lot about where we had been since I left and he even said he had seen my art, saying that it was cool, but not his cup of tea. I wasn't even discouraged at his critique, I was just surprised it wasn't an insult. Everything had been going so well. That was until another round came our way. I'm already extremely intoxicated but I take what I think might be vodka and tip it down my throat... then it starts to fight its way back up.

I immediately run to the bathroom and I can hear Damon say "I should probably help him out." from behind me.

As soon as I get myself situated in a stall, I am on my hands and knees throwing up the dinner Damon, my mom, and I had worked so hard to make today. I feel Damon rubbing circles into my back as I continue to empty my stomach contents into the dirty bar toilet.

"At least you had food in you." Damon chuckles. "That would have hurt like a bitch if it had just been stomach acid.".

I just groan into the porcelain basin. He is not making this experience any better for me. It takes another ten minutes of throwing up before I feel fine again. Completely trashed, but fine none the less. I wadh out my mouth in the sink and drink some of the water as Damon offers me a mint which I take graciously. I go to try and give him a quick kiss, but he dodges away and I pout.

"There is no way we're making out until you get a hold of a toothbrush." He laughs and I pout harder. I look up and give him the most pleading sad look I can muster up and he sighs.

"Okay, baby. Not on the mouth though." He murmers as he goes for my neck I giggle and tangle my fingers into his hair as he pulls the collar of my shirt down to have access to my collarbone. He gets a little rougher, licking a strip along the sensitive skin before biting. Right as I let the moan that had been bubbling in my throat escape someone walks in.

"Hey Graham, I got you some wa- oh for fuck's sake!" Jacob yells as he storms out.

Damon and I stare at each other with wide, terrified eyes.

Well fuck.

***
2130 words.

Well, looks like Graham has to come out a lot sooner than he thought he would...