I needed to write something about Cub's exile.

I think it just made me sadder.

GoodTimeWithScar whispered to you: Cub we need to talk

GoodTimeWithScar whispered to you: at comfort room

You whispered to GoodTimeWithScar: coming

I look over from building my house in exile. It's the day after I arrived here. Honestly, I expected this message sooner. I knew Scar would be upset by my decision. I knew he'd want to confront me about it. But it's still hard to stomach. With a deep breath, I tidy up my blocks and take to the air towards spawn. The sound of Scar's calming recordings reaches me as I land outside. He's here, alright. I slow down, trying to keep my emotions in line as I enter the building, all the way through to the comfort room. I pause just inside. Scar's there, sat hunched on the couch, staring off into the distance, listening to his own comfort tapes. My heart sinks and twists with guilt. I knock on the wall.

'Hey,' I say. He pauses the recording, turning to face me. It's clear he's been crying. He probably hasn't slept either.

'Why did you do this, Cub?' Scar whispers. 'Why?'

'You know why,' I reply. I try to keep looking at him, but his expression is too upset, too betrayed. I glance at the ground. 'You felt their influence growing too. I couldn't put the server in danger.'

'We can control them, though.' Scar slips from the couch, stepping closer. 'There's the Safe Room below the Permit Office.'

'We chased Joe across the server for 5 hours in mindless bloodlust.'

Scar doesn't reply. He's on the verge of crying again.

'No one was hurt.'

'That's not an excuse.'

Scar's silent again. Another small step closer.

'What if I need you?'

'You can come to exile...?' It's a terrible answer. We know it's a terrible answer. We know it'll do nothing when Scar wakes up mid-panic attack after a nightmare about Secret Life. The nightmares that have only grown more frequent with this exile threat. 'Look, man, I'm sorry. But imagine what would happen if they took control while we were hunting No Poe. Or- or made us hurt Skizz and Grian to ensure their loyalty or some shit. It's almost happened already. I couldn't risk it. I had to leave, and do it before they tried to stop me.' I fall silent, just before I start crying. Part of me screams for doing this. Part of me hates myself for leaving.

'Oh Cub...' Scar steps even closer, close enough to run a hand through my hair. I place mine on his cheek, wiping away his tears.

'I'm sorry.'

'Surely there were other options...'

'It would've taken too long to find them. The Vex were out for blood. I can hide out here and cause harmless chaos. You can stay with Grian and Skizz and stop Beef and Joe.'

'I want to be with you, Cub.'

'I'm sorry, man.'

'It's not the same with Skizz or Grian. They're great, but Skizz doesn't know what I've gone through and Grian's gonna blame me and laugh at me for messing up like he always does,' Scar's about to cry. His expression haunts me. I can't find a reply. I can't make this better. I desperately try not to start sobbing.

'I knew I shouldn't have taken the roll of Permit Manager,' I mutter, vision blurring with my own tears. 'I knew they were always going to get involved.'

'Don't say that...'

'You know it's true, Scar,' I look up at him. 'The Vex were always going to jump at a chance for power. And get upset when people question it.'

'It's not fair!' Scar bursts out. 'It's not fair that they're always just...'

He starts sobbing. I pull him into a tight hug. Scar hugs back, just crying into my shoulder.

'I know,' I murmur. The pit of guilt in my stomach only grows. 'I know...'

'When will this end, Cub?'

'I don't know.'

'I just want to build my zoo, and hang out, and play Hungry Hermits and TCG, and not have to worry about spawn being 30 million blocks away,' A pause. 'About you being 30 million fucking blocks away...'

'I'm sorry,' is the only reply I have.

'Stop saying that.' mutters back Scar. 'It's not your fault. It's the stupid vex that forced your hand.'

Silence. My mind struggles through options to help Scar, make anything right, comfort him.

'How long do you have here before returning?' I land on.

'Tomorrow morning.'

'Well... all my spacey bits were in my ender chest. And it's a clear night...' Scar knows what I'm implying.

'Are there any good spots around here?'

'I'm sure we could find somewhere. If you wanted to.'

'Yeah.' Scar snuffles back a sob. 'Yeah, I'd like that.'

We step from the hug. Tears still run down Scar's face.

'Should we go now?' he asks.

'Yeah, yeah. The sun'll be going down soon...' I leave the room, Scar following silently. It's a short flight to an appropriate mountain. The setting up of our stuff is bittersweet, far slower than usual. Neither of us want this to end. Scar barely speaks. I can tell he's fighting tears the whole time, as we sit down together, cuddled up in a blanket, staring up at the stars. With so little light pollution, they're incredible. I smile.

'You know what I love about space?' I murmur. Scar glances over.

'What?'

'That no matter where you are, whatever world, however far away you are, the night sky stay the same. The days will pass the same, the constellations are still the same, the science is the same.'

'Even 30 million blocks away?' Scar asks.

'Even 30 million blocks away.'

I think he smiles at that, hugging closer. Before shifting position, moving his untouched plate of cake closer to me.

'Do you want some? I don't have the appetite for it.'

'No appetite for cake, man?!'

'Well, I'm sorry! We're gonna be 30 million blocks apart from each other for weeks. Of course I'm feeling bad!' It was supposed to come across humorously. But it doesn't. Scar falls silent again. His tears shine in the moonlight. 'Notch, I'm gonna miss you.'

'You can visit every day.'

'Not if I'm to be keeping up Poe duties for Grian. Hunting down Joe and Beef. I won't get to see you, Cub. We can't hang out, and all because the stupid Vex...'

'Honestly, we needed some more Permit action over here anyway. It was too cozy,' I admit.

'Too many fish religions,' Scar replies. We manage to laugh at that.

'Indeed.'

Scar yawns. He rests his head in my lap, still staring at the sky.

'Try get some rest. I know you haven't slept,' I suggest, running a hand through his hair.

'If I fall asleep, I'll miss dawn. We won't get to say goodbye properly.'

'Then we can do it now.' The words don't want to come. 'Goodbye, Scar.'

'Bye Cub.'

'Go exile Joe for me.'

'I will. You make sure he has the worst welcome in the history of welcomes.'

'Oh, don't worry about that, man. Don't you worry...'

Scar laughs, a sound I'm going to miss.

'And I'll visit whenever I can.'

'You'd better... and watch my base for me. I don't want anyone touching my diamonds.'

'On it, Permit Manager Cub!'

'That's what I like to hear. And find that blackstone permit, Scar.'

'Hmm... what?' Scar feigns ignorance. I sigh, amused.

'Never mind.'

We fall silent again, still looking up at the sky, until I drift asleep, holding Scar close.

And wake up on my own.

:(