A/N- R.I.P Wholesomeness. You'll be missed for a while.
W/C- 3000 (woo a long one! Jeez)

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POV: SCOTT (FOR CONTEXT THIS IS NOW PRESENT DAY)

I. Hate. That. Bitch. I wish she never existed. I wish she had changed schools when I told her not to. I wish a bomb would blow her house so fucking high in the sky. And no. I don't regret thinking that.

"Mr. Smajor? The question on the board please," I'm snapped back to the present by the teachers voice. I blink sleep from my eyes as I scan the board for the question.

"I-uh- the answer-" I stutter just as someone cuts me off.

"It's 838.539 Ms.," I look to my right to see her. Ugh why is she being such a goddamn know it all. Showing off. I could've answered that! She turns and makes eye contact with me. "Simple question really." Her voice is sneering and passive aggressive. I roll my eyes.

"C'mon Scott. When did you get so... dumb," she raises an eyebrow. "Oh also while you raise your IQ, have you been checking out your weight? I'd go weigh yourself tonight if I were you."

I feel my face flush as I turn away from her. Is that true? I mean, she's never lied. Is that true? Am I eating too much? She said that during the end of the relation ship so-

I sigh, turning away from her and trying to pay attention to the rest of the lesson. What felt like a minute later I heard the bell ring. I shove my things in my bag and stand up, trying to walk out of class as quickly as possible. As I approach the door a feel a figure shove past me. I nearly fall in the process of trying not to hit another student.

"Pearl could you stop-" I start.

"Hmmm no!" She smiles at me. Why is she making my life a living hell right now. I get we broke up and yes maybe I'm the part of the reason for it but it was like a month ago! During the holidays! A voice in the back of my mind keeps telling me its all my fault. That I'm the reason for all of this. Maybe it's cause it's all my fault. Maybe she's not doing okay as she seems. Ugh would my damn thoughts shut up.I watch her turn around a practically skip away.

A sigh escapes me as I make my way to the cafeteria for break. As I enter theI make sure to straighten my posture and out on a smile. Have to look okay, you know? I slip past the line of people for food before taking a seat at the table. Our group has stayed decently the same except for Pearl leaving. Grian glances awkwardly at me before turning back to his food. Great. I guess I'm not surprised he hates me too. Or maybe not hate but he's really awkward around me.

"Hi!" I keep my voice light and a smile covers my face. Fake? Yes. Believable? Also yes. Jimmy smiles back at me.

"Hey Scott! Did you re-dye your hair? Looks vibrant!" Jimmy points out. I redid my cyan hair in hopes it'll fix my life. Didn't but at least I look happy! So I'm not bringing anyone else down at the moment.

"Yep redid my hair. Was bored," I shrug. I nod my head towards the rest of the group as they take a seat at the table. I smile and say hi and im immediately answered with a series of hi's, hellos and sups. Everyone started eating the school lunch. I gagged a bit at the look. It's one of the better lunches but just the thought of food and the... calories is making me feel so sick.

I turn to Jimmy to chat. Before I can start he starts talking.

"Hey Scott why don't you have food?" He tilts his head slightly. "You okay? I mean that's a dumb question after Pearl but uh- you get what I mean."

I laugh softly at the end of the sentence. "I uh had a big breakfast this morning," I lie through my teeth. It doesn't matter. I don't need food. It's overrated anyway. Quickly I attempt to change the subject. "Uhhh so how was class?"

Jimmy raises an eyebrow at me. Yep he knows. But whatever he's thinking he decided not to say. "Yeahhh it was good I guess. As good as class can be I suppose." I can fee Jimmy's gaze one me, questioning and searching yet soft and caring in a way.

After the break up me and Jimmy had gotten closer. I'd go over to his place all the time after... it. But that doesn't matter. I need to get over myself and move on.

- - -
POV: PEARL

Oh Scott. Why. Did. You. Do. This. I'm fine! Totally and utterly fine. Just the love of my life leaving me. Yeah noooo. Definitely a-ok.

Ever since the break up I'd been sitting with a different group. Who would want to sit with Scott. That backstabbing bitch. Anyway my group consists of quite a few people. You know, they're nice and all but they'll never be quite like my group. But hey! Gem's sweet, Skizz and Impulse are funny, Stress is lovely, Iskall is- Iskall. And BigB is really caring. I just don't feel like I fit right with them.

"Peeaaarrrllll," I turn at the mention of my name.

"Hey Gem, wassup?" I smile at the shorter girl with flower red hair.

"I love having you here and all but why did you change groups anyway. Scott's in the other group-" I flinch slightly at his name. "so why are you here?"

I sigh slightly, pushing my hair out of my face. "We uh. We're not a thing anymore," I can hear the sneer and hurt in my voice but hopefully Gem can't. For a second I think I see a questioning look flash in her eyes but I cant be sure. Silence settles over us before I hear Impulse speak up.

"Soooo I had an idea-" he starts. I cut him off straight away.

"You? An idea? Jeez spare me!" I dramatically thrown my hand onto my forehead like in every play on I've seen. I can feel the eye roll without looking at the boy. "Impulse. For the time I've known you, any idea of yours is other extremely dumb and most likely will get us killed or it's straight down my ally. Which is it Imp?"

He chuckles a bit. "Well if you let me finish I'd tell you! Soooo, you know how we have a double period next period? Like some English class or something or other." The rest of the group nodded, half still eating, the rest finished and I wasn't feeling it at the moment so I grabbed no food. Whatever.

"Continue Mr. Group Planner," I laugh, getting a few smiles from the rest of the group.

"Does anyone feel like play a massive game of Hide 'n' Seek around the school while everyone's in class?" Impulse raises an eyebrow as he speaks. As soon as he finishes I agree to it. Anything to get out seeing Scott I guess (yes I've been blessed with the luck of having him so like- all my damn classes. God forbid I get any peace). I've skipped a couple of classes this year and found I'm actually quite good at avoiding teachers and students and even when I do get caught I've always managed to get out of it. My agreeance was steadily followed by the rest of the group, most eagerly by Gem and Skizz.

For the rest of break we excitedly talk about the game and agree on Iskall seeking and the rest of our group hiding around the school.

"Okay so rules," Stress starts. She's practically the mum of the group. Responsible but also she can be just as crazy as the rest of us, if not more to be honest. "Boundaries are outside the main few buildings. No leaving the school. No bribing other students to hide you. If you get caught by a teacher or someone like that, don't dob anyone in-" Everyone immediately yelled at Stress for this. They would never. I've only known them for a month and they've never gotten each other in trouble. "Uhhh don't hide in your gender bathrooms for obvious reasons. And once you're caught you're to help the seeker. Got that luvs?"

Stress always uses pet names with the group. No romantic intent is behind the words, that's obvious. It's her was of letting them know she appreciates them. As everyone nods in response I feel Gem elbow my side softly in an attempt to get my attention.

"What do you need oh short child," I smile at her. Hey, pretending to be okay actual makes me feel better!... okay maybe not... but at least the pretending gets easier.

"Wanna stick together for the game? We can go towards the science classes and hide somewhere there?" She asks me quietly, making sure Iskall doesn't hear her.

"Yeah sure that sounds good!" I whisper back with a small grin. This should be fun. Plus it gets me out of English. Who likes that subject anyway? Only the teachers I guess and even then they look depressed teaching it.

Soon enough we hear the bell ring and we follow the crowd out of the cafeteria. Thank god we don't run into Scott on the way out. As the crowd slowly thins out we find an empty class room and slip inside. I see BigB lock the door behind him and we go to the back of the classroom and sit down, waiting for everyone to get into their classes.

The sound of footsteps slowly died out from outside the classroom and eventually they were all gone. We sit in silence, just to confirm that we're good to go.

"Sooo...?" Skizz looked around at us. "Do we go?" Silence continued for a second before everyone stood up, looked at one another and ran out the room, trying their best to be quiet. Gem grabbed my hand and began dragging me down the hall, taking a few turns. When we were far enough away from the starting room we slowed down, trying to make sure we weren't caught by a teacher coming out to check "who was running in the halls".

"So what happened?" Gem said out of nowhere. I turn to her.

"What happened?" I echo back, knowing all well what she was asking about.

"Between you and Scott. I swear you two were gonna get married by the way you guys acted last year," I sigh.

"Why don't you ask him? He's your cousin and all. Doesn't word spread?" I raise an eyebrow at her.

"Yes but he-" she stops halfway her sentence. We're nearly at the science rooms and I know a good few hiding spots around there so I have no clue why we've stopped. As I turn to ask her why when I see the answer. A teacher had rounded the corner at the end of the hall we're headed down. He hasn't looked up from his phone yet so he hasn't spotted us.

On silent agreement we begin to back away, still facing him. Slowly at first but gradually picking up speed. We turn around, now walking/ jogging at a silent, steady pace. C'mon, we're nearly at the corner. I think to myself. Just as I think me and Gem are in the clear I hear a voice- the teachers voice. Ignoring whatever the hell the guy said, we exchange a look and bolt down the hall and surprisingly I hear footsteps following us. First time a teachers put up a chase.

I'm sure we can easily outrun him but I'm not sure if he knows who we are yet. As we reach the end of this hallway there's a left turn and a right. With a quick glance down the right I spot a teacher just exiting a class. I bolt down the left one, reaching the library and slipping inside. I turn around to find Gem- Gem not behind me. I groan. Damnit I lost her. I swear if that teacher caught her I'm not gonna forgive myself. I walk silently through the library, hoping the librarian is nowhere around. As I head towards the back in hope of finding a hiding spot the thoughts start.

Not going to forgive yourself like how you won't forgive Scott. It wasn't only his fault. You said things. You deserve n-o-t-h-i-n-g. You pathetic, worthless shit. Your own brother probably doesn't even love you. He's too tied up with his relationship with Scar and drama with BigB to care.

I clench my fist into a tight ball as I walk. These damn thoughts won't shut up. They tell me to do things. They tell me things that aren't true but sound it. I shake my head. It doesn't matter. They're probably normal right? Everyone gets this... right? Whatever.

I turn my attention to finding a hiding spot. As I search I hear the library entrance door open. I sneak along the back of the library, hiding amongst the bookshelves and desks to see who it is. Crap. Of course it's Iskall. I creep back, hoping to find somewhere to hide. That's when it catches my eye. A piece of wood, leaning against the wall between 2 full book shelves. I walk as softly and quickly as I can over, praying Iskall doesn't see me- I'm competitive, okay? Deal with it.

As I move it to the side I see the entrance to a room. Yep sounds like our school. Block it off with wood and think no one will ever find it.

I hear footsteps approaching and I slip inside, blocking off the entrance and covering my mouth. I hear them stop for a moment, like he knows I'm here, before moving on past. I turn towards the room I found.

Bookshelves full of the most random crap line the walls, beanbags on the ground and a table in the middle. As I step inside, a sound makes me look to the right. In the very corner of a room is a boy. He's got longish blond hair and a headband holding it back. His knees are brought up to his head and his arms wrapped around his legs tightly. His breath sounds quick and ragged and he sounds like he's sobbing. I'm not sure he even knows I'm here. I walk over cautiously, kneeling down to get at his level.

"Hey.." I start awkwardly but as soft as I can, hoping for a reaction. He lifts his head to look at me. Tears are streaming down his face and he's still hyperventilating. "Youuuuu.... Okay?" I end awkwardly. I inwardly curse at myself.

"Can't. Breath," he gasps out. I place an hand on his hand, taking it away from his legs. I can feel him shaking. Great. Just met the guy and I'm helping him with a panic attack. Great day Pearl. Great day.

"It's okay. Okay. Um. So," I try to figure out what to do. Sure I've had panic attacks. And sure I've had quite a few- particularly this year. But do I know how to stop them? God no. "Try breathing in for 4. Hold for 5. And out for 4. Uh- try and sync your breath up with me. In," I count to 4. "Hold..... out..... in..... hold....."

I repeat this process with him until his breathing is even and the tears have slowed. "Feeling a bit better now?"

He nods and takes a deep breath before speaking. "Thanks... I-I'm so sorry about that. That was embarrassing. You-you should've just left. But thanks. Um I didn't get your name?" His voice is still slightly shaky but better than before. I glance at him up and down. He seems sweet. Not that I can really judge people well though I don't think.

"I'm Pearl. Pearl Escent," I smile at him, hoping it looked genuine. "And you?"

"Martyn," he murmured. "Martyn Littlewood."

I have to restrain myself from laughing. Littlewood. Now that's an unfortunate last name. He must've seen the amusement in my eyes but he didn't say anything. Instead, a tiny, halfhearted smile played on his face for a second and he let out a small chuckle.

"Yeah I know. I don't care if you laugh." Look in my defence he said he doesn't care if I laugh so....

I burst out laughing. "IM SO SORRY!" I manage to get that out. Somehow he ends up joining me in laughter. I think 5 minutes past before we both settled down. Silence rang out for a moment.

"So do you need to.. talk?" I ask awkwardly.

"No. It's not your problem so you shouldn't have to deal with it..." his voice trailed off and I turn to him.

"Fuck it. We're friends now yah bitch. Your problem is my problem okay? Vent. Spill the beans. Let it all out mate," I can hear my own Aussie accent more than normal. I'm not even sure why I decided we're friends now. Maybe it's because I feel like I connect with this guy. Maybe it's because I pity him or maybe I just don't know. I hear him sigh.

"If you're sure."

"I'm sure."

"Do you promise to keep a secret?"

"I promise."

Maybe making a new friend will help.

- - -
A/N- WOO! God I got lovely writers block about half way through tbh. Don't love, don't have this chapter. Anyway hope you enjoyed!
Remember, criticism is always welcome (as long as it's done respectfully)

Remember to eat, drink, take any needed meds. SLEEP. And look after yourselves <3
Love yah!