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"But the cure, the cure to my loneliness was hidden in her eyes. All along, she had the key, no- she was the key."
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[KAYOS ADREN PRIME]

MY SANCTUARY has always been a place of rest.

As if in another realm, I spent countless hours of the day willingly trapped inside, simply reading, or with my eyes closed, wasting the cursed daylight hours in endless thoughts, down deep in the embrace of the endless.

Searching for peace. For the deep quiet echoing from the despair that surrounds me. From the fear that claws my cloak by my subjects with every sighting of me.

However, since Shades' arrival, it has morphed into something entirely—different.

I thought I knew peace. I thought I understood the power of my sanctuary, but no.

Her scent folds me in the moment I enter. I'm drawn in ways unmeasurable. My heart a rapid beat inside me from the adrenaline coursing through me.

Greenwood.

I lock all thoughts of them as I surround myself with the scent that lures me.

It is as if I've been drugged with poisons rare and deadly, and yet I only desire to take more. To drown and keep my head beneath the water, for that is how alluring her scent is.

Diabolical, deliciously—that it seeds such an addiction, there is no cure I would take if it was handed to me on a golden platter.

Strange. Strange how my wolf senses danger and yet I wish nothing more than to run to it. Weaving through aisles to find her.

Her.

There. There she is.

I am breathless when my eyes find her, stopping in place.

I watch her as if back in the endless. Cleaning, her lips lightly pursed, her hair full of dark tight round curls, so dark it shimmers in the light of the candle as she leans forward on her ladder.

Her fingers gently trace over book spines, straightening, filing.

It is so effortless the way they dance, I admit that I am entranced, trailing the silhouette of her body, the dips—my breath shallows—the curves...

"Oh for honey's sake, take me out of this pocket!" the fairy fights against the fabric, snapping me back to reality.

He pushes through, pulling at it until he climbs out sloppily, an evident struggle for the small creature.

He grumbles incoherently about giants and their sharp large shoulders as he he tugs and pulls himself out, huffing and puffing until he finally manages to lift himself to my shoulder, legs swinging off, cheeks red as if he has just won a war.

He glances at me as he brushes off imaginary dust from my shoulder where he sits, "for goodness sake, one would think the giant would offer a lift or a tiny push," he mumbles fixing his tiny grin shirt.

The sprite is becoming bolder it seems.

His eyes survey the library, lighting when he spots Shade.

"Ah, there she is!" he gleams, leaning back on his little hands, "Oh I am a good fairy, good good good. I have done my task," he grins to himself., "Yes, I have."

He glances at me, "Off we go! What are we waiting for? Onward!" He points towards shade triumphantly, "We must march on!"

I turn slightly when Alchest climbs onto my other shoulder, snaking the back of my neck, his eyes gleaming when he spots the sprite in his territory, growling lowly.

"Oh, can it, you big bully! There's clearly enough space on this large man's shoulder for the both of us," he huffs, folding his arms stubbornly.

Alchest flashes his fangs, showing his three sets of teeth, a glimmer of death in the candlelight, sending the tiny sprite toppling over my shoulder from the mere shock of it.

He falls off but quickly shifts into a raven before hitting the ground and soaring off rather quickly, in the direction of Shade.

I glance down at Alchest who huffs, snaking his spot triumphantly.

I suppose that was one way to get rid of the talkative faerie.

My eyes return to the center. To the focus of all that surrounds me. As if he senses I am taken far from him, Alchest shifts back into the shadows and leaves me alone in her presence.

I am drawn to her. To whatever she is. For the shadows themselves curve around her.

She's not a keffer. No.

What is she? What is this beauty that reels me in?

I cannot even describe the depth of it.

I find my feet moving of their own accord. The noise and the rapid beat of my own heart slows the closer I am to her.

I find the silence I know my sanctuary to be, and true I find peace, but now it is wrapped in such comfort, that it feels like a different place altogether.

Shade keeps her eyes on her books and I am afraid if I am to speak I will scare her again.

"You're late." She speaks surprising me.

My eyebrows gather watching as she keeps stacking books. She has not spared me a look and yet she knows I am here.

I would not have thought-

"It has been hours— hours. Selene, sometimes I think you want to me lose my mind in this place," she sighs.

I glance around at the dark space. I find it more of a comfort, I suppose I am a creature of the dark, therefore I am more accustomed to it.

I return to her, watching as her fingers mindlessly reach for another book on her stack, but she is an inch short.

I reach out, handing it to her. I admit I feel at home there, back in her vicinity.

She takes it, and I examine the books she packs through. I pick one up and ponder which section of the library she is working on.

Ah, "The Time Before," the full account of Alexander's rule.

The abundance and all that came before the Mages Curse. Before all death fell forward, before chaos, before Loss, before the emblems of war.

All that was. All that never will be again.

"M-master."

I slowly pull from the book at her call. My eyes belong to her in an instant, raising an eyebrow to ensure her she has all my attention.

I met with eyes of surprise and bewilderment, eyebrows drawing in, at the tightness of which she holds onto the ladder, and the sudden upbeat pace of her heart.

Her nonexistent breaths.

I am concerned for a moment. Has she seen something that might have frightened her?

Though it is only I here- no other heartbeat but Diane's echoes here, and he is far from frightening.

I do not understand why she stills so.....      - breathe.

I lose my thoughts.

Her eyes. Those eyes that weave patterns through my soul.

Breathe.

The space between us sings.

"Yes?" I respond. I can barely hear my own voice. I know the bond—a bond exists between us, but this...

Selene. Selene is cruel beyond words.

It is hypnosis. Is it not? For how can one's gaze have the power to simply cause everything else to fade and only their eyes center the very axis of a being's whole world?

It is as if I see her again, just looking at me freely from a realm only I should exist, sleeping not an arm's length away- flowers leaning in if only to graze her skin.

"Hello," she speaks softly. Hesitantly.

Her stance is looser, there is no fear in her eyes.

No fear.

I am not fear to her. Far from it.

This realization eases me further.

There is something there, hidden beneath the shine. Something I am too afraid to define. I cannot. For if it were not so, it would ruin me.

Simply. Utterly.

I am taken aback at my confession. My lips move of my own accord, entranced.

"Hello, Shade."

My heart thuds at the slight rise of her lips, and the bright in her eyes. She leans back, her arms loosen and she simply looks down at me.

I watch her religiously. I study her as if her skin was dipped in ink and littered with all the stories and secrets shelved in this sanctuary.

My wolf saunters within me, quiet and watching, eager yet tamed and silent, as if he too studies. As if he too reads.

Hunting and ready to devour-

A loud caw rings between us, Diane perching closer and I pull him back in as if in the nick of time, a momentary loss of sanity. To let him close to her is not ideal.

Not when she knows I am a master, not the Night Wolf, not when he is the being that haunts her dreams and promises a death sudden and cruel. The monster she hates.

The thought is cold within me. I am brought back to reality. The cold truth of the lies I have spun. The web weaved.

"You're here.." she speaks. It is soft but careful.

"I am." I stare for a moment when I remember her words, "though I confess I did not know that I was late."

She laughs shortly at my words, her eyes are truly bright. I think I crave that sound. I am reminded I have never been this close to beauty.

"Late? No, you're not late, master-" I barely listen as I simply stare. She is gone with her words I note. But I do not mind. I find that I like it when she speaks so freely. Bolder, and free.

"I mean you're not just late," my eyes follow her lips, "you were uhm—."

I raise an eyebrow still entranced awaiting their movements again when she pauses.
When her lips do not move again, my gaze trails upwards to her face, and suddenly I feel an unease.

Her lips suddenly straighten and it is as if the light has been blown out, as her eyebrows gather intensely,

"Actually you were gone."

My heart thuds within me. Staring at her cold demeanor. It is as if she has snapped. She adopts a stature I have seen before.

Her eyes lift to mine, and I see that the light flickers in her eyes only for a bit as if she fights a battle within her, and then it is gone. For good.

I do not like it. I feel that I have lost something. Something precious I have not taken care of, something that may cost me more than I have to give.

"For four days." She whispers breathlessly. Her words are lifeless and broken. She swallows and her shoulder falls slightly, "You were gone for four days."

The light is as if it never existed. As if it was never discovered.

"Shade?" I find myself calling for her. For eyes, for her smile, for her warmth, for her light.

Her lips press tighter and she takes the book from my hand, cold, "Thank you for stopping by, master, but do not worry." She states. Her words are quick and hold no care.

"I will not keep you," she assures me as if I ran from my mating to these chambers out of duty and not because I needed her.

She offers me a smile, but I know it is not a smile even if her lips curve. If there is no light in her eyes, it is of no significance. It is a simple gesture my subjects give to me from time to time. 

I had no want to ever see it mirrored on the one person capable of giving me the truest form of it.

It is not hard to understand that in the little time I have made my presence known I have angered her in some way. What way? I can think of a few but all the reasons elude me when she turns her back towards my pondering, going further up the ladder.

I hold it down for her as she moves further watching. For she moves with such anger it shakes.

"I understand you are very busy." She mocks glancing down at me, "So if there is anything you need for your study, I will do what I can to help," she continued, "If not, you really must move out of the way, master, you see there is a quite a lot of dust here."

Before I can speak showers of dust rain from above me, leaving me speechless. The particles dare to be numerous and the heavy dust clouds my sharp senses, I immediately feel my throat itch.

I am reminded that although my wolf can kill bears and I may summon shadows, I am not a god. I do have my weaknesses, however-

More showers of dust rain down as Shade dusts her cloth.

-insignificant they should be to a being as admittedly powerful as I. Yet in the end I am part man, and so I cough miserably as am overtaken, the particles invade my senses.

Soon the cloud of dust takes my vision.

"Shade?" I risk to call, an elbow over my face. The cloud only increases.

"Shade, I cannot breathe-" The dust settles everywhere and I feel I am breathing in dust.  I try to speak but I am overtaken.

It is clear I am not wanted. Yet, I cannot walk away.
For where will I go? When it is only here, in this sanctuary with her, that I feel whole.

I step away only to evade the dust, but I know I dare not venture far.

I will wait, and I will return.

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Hi everyone! I hope you enjoyed the short update. It's been a while. If you need to I do urge you to reread the last few chapters. This is simply a rewrite of our previous chapter in Kayos' POV. Bonus chapters like this will only be shared on Patreon after this one.
I hope everyone had a wonderful New Year!

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