flicker | a brief feeling or indication of emotion

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1/13/17

"ARE YOU READY Mae?" My best friend Francesca asks me as we both walk up to the large house at The Grove.

I let out a large sigh and nod once in response. The ginormous house is overwhelming and breathtaking at the same time. The cool air hits my bare shoulders and lifts the ends of my hair causing them to float even if for just a moment.

Francesca loops her arm through mine and pulls me forward into the mansion. My best friend loves parties, just as much as she loves being the center of attention. Not in a bad way, she is popular and well liked and extremely beautiful, so why wouldn't she want all eyes on her. Why she's friends with me I will never know, but I'm thankful for her because she pushes me out of my comfort zone. Like attending this party.

As soon as we step through the threshold of the doors, heat engulfs us as well as the smell of sweat and beer. It's not actually cold out, but to us Floridians it might as well be in the negatives. It smells and sounds just like any other high school party, and nerves wind their way into my chest. I appreciate my best friend for making me step out of the box, but that doesn't make it any easier on someone who is as introverted as I am.

I've always sat in the background as Francesca takes all the glory, because she flourishes in the light while I wither away from it. But at more social events such as parties I'm forced to take in more light then I usually do, which only frightens me.

"I need a drink right now," Francesca states as she begins to walk towards the kitchen dragging me along behind her.

She knows if she asks me for a drink I'll say no, so instead she pulls me with her knowing if she puts a drink in my hand I will at least sip on it.

"What do you want?" she asks with a smile as she slides behind the island and begins to play bartender.

I shrug not really caring. "Whatever you're having Franny," I respond as I always do.

"Good choice," she smirks.

Francesca flips her dark hair over her shoulder and begins to whip out the ingredients for her favorite drink. An amaretto sour with two ice cubes and a single orange.

People slide their way in and out through the kitchen always saying hello to Francesca, and casting small waves to me. I'm the afterthought, the side note in every way, but I don't mind. This is a small town, but fairly wealthy. While I'm not poor, I'm also not anywhere near loaded like my friend Francesca or others who live here at The Grove. My mother gives me everything she can, but I don't ask for much in return either. Though I also don't talk much about my life around these people.

They would judge me without even knowing me, and I won't let that happen. Because they would make me feel as if I should be ashamed when I know I'm not. I have a loving mother, which is more than a lot of people can say about their own parents here.

"Here you go," Francesca sings as she slides her drink at me over the marble counter.

I lift the cold drink to my lips and sip on the sourness of the drink.

Francesca comes over to stand next to me as we lean against the counter facing the main scene of the gathering. People make out, dance, and mingle as the loud party music wraps through their ears and tears through their bodies.

"Did you see Asher?" Francesca asks as she gulps down almost half her drink in one large sip.

I shake my head. "Nope," I answer honestly. But it's not as if I was looking for him either when I walked into his house. My best friend has made it her mission to get Asher as we only have four months left of high school before we all head off to college.

"He was talking to Jace and O'Conner near the staircase," she motions with her drink in her hand towards the left staircase. That's right, there are two staircases. "But I haven't seen him since," she comments as her eyes wash over the crowd over and over trying to find her crush.

"Hmm," I mumble as my only response, trying not to say anything to ruin the party mood.

"Why don't you like him Mae?" Francesca asks as her attention falls to me. While I love being in the background, my best friend is the only one who can see through my bullshit. I don't blend in with her. She finishes off her drink, and lets an ice cube fall into her mouth as she begins to suck on it.

"I just think he can be full of himself," I respond awkwardly albeit truthfully as I take another small sip of my drink letting the sourness take over my taste buds.

"Well I would be too if I looked like him," she jokes as she takes the second ice cube into her mouth.

I can't help the chuckle that falls from my lips in a single breath. "You're not wrong I guess," I comment in agreement. Because while I rarely pay attention to Asher or any of his friends, one would have to be completely blind to not notice how attractive he is.

Francesca rounds the corner of the island to quickly pour herself a shot of rum. "You want one?" she asks as she lifts the clear liquor in the air.

She always asks, even though she knows I won't agree. "I'm good Fran," I tell her, taking another sip of my drink as my eyes cast to the ever-growing crowd of the party.

My best friend quickly takes her shot when her phone rings her signature ringtone of ducks quacking. "Hello?" she answers as she mixed herself another drink. Francesca is built like a frat boy with how much she can down but at the same time still keep herself together.

Francesca continues to nod along as I cling to the corner of the island trying to stay out of the way of the many people swarming into the house. It's one of the largest parties of the year as it's the one that kicks off the second half of the school year. Our last semester in high school.

"Okay, I'm on my way," she responds before clicking off her phone and shoving it back into the pocket of her jeans.

"Who was that?" I ask already knowing she's about to leave me alone. She may be my best friend, but she's also Francesca Dadario, one of the most popular girls in school. Which means she can only stay by my side for so long before someone beckons her and she flies off to please the masses.

"Jessica needs me in the bathroom, apparently there's an emergency," she says as she steps around the counter to stand beside me once again.

My nose scrunches at the sound of Jessica's name. Any other of Francesca's friends I would've lamely asked to tag along, but Jessica is someone I'd rather not be around.

"Go ahead," I smile weakly. "I'll hang out here," I say, acting as if it's nothing. But it isn't nothing. I hate being alone at these parties, but I know I can't always cling to my best friend.

Francesca flashes her perfect smile at me before turning on her heel to head towards the bathroom without a second glance towards me. I move my way to the edge of the kitchen and hope I blend into the wall so no one notices me. I've been asked every year in high school if I was a new student, even though I've known everyone else here since middle school. Why try and stand out when I was born to blend in?

Well apparently my wish comes true, because someone I don't recognize bumps into me hard enough that my drink as well as his spills on to my new white tank top.

"Shit!" I shout as I try to pull back as much as possible though it's too late as the cold liquids have already hit me making my skin instantly break out in goosebumps.

"Oh," the guy says, finally acknowledging me. "Sorry didn't see you there," he slurs before stepping further into the kitchen and away from me as if he didn't just spill his entire drink all over me. Guess I should be more careful for what I wish for in the future.

"Whatever," I rumble as I roll my eyes and try and pull at the shirt that's stuck on my skin. The stickiness makes me wince in disgust and annoyance.

I huff before weaving my way out of the kitchen and towards the upstairs knowing Francesca and her friends are in the downstairs bathroom. I quickly make my way up the stairs taking some two at a time as the discomfort of the cold shirt continues to be glued to my body. The colors red and brown mix in large blots over my top and irritation whips through me, as it's the first time I've worn this top.

As soon as I hit the last step all I see are doors, and knowledge of what's going down behind those doors makes me want to roll my eyes. I pass by each door slowly, pausing to see if I hear any voices or sounds of writhing bodies behind the wooden doors. The fifth door I pass is when my body stops as my ears hear nothing lying behind this specific door. My hand tentatively reaches out for the doorknob and when it twists easily my heart stops hoping I don't find anyone naked in the room.

I wet my lips as the room is doused in darkness, no sounds fill the quiet air, and I reach out to flick the light switch. The room immediately fills with warm light and a sigh of relief slips through my lips at the sight of an empty room.

My eyes take in the room, which obviously belongs to a boy, but I don't take in too much as my eyes lock in the door that is open and leading to an obvious bathroom.

I quickly shut the door behind myself and make my way over to the sink in the bathroom. I whip off my shirt hating the way the fabric pulls with stickiness against the skin of my stomach. I start the sink letting the water warm up as I let toss my shirt into the sink as well with some soap. I let the bowl fill with suds and try to scrub out the stains with a spare hand towel when I hear an odd sound come from behind me.

My eyes shoot up to meet another pair in the mirror only to see someone standing behind me. My mouth gapes open in shock at the sight of a man behind me as his eyes take in my half naked and sticky body. Asher Lawton.

"Is this my birthday gift?" Asher asks as he crosses his arms over his wide chest with a smirk painting his lips.

My hands fly to my chest suddenly extremely aware that I'm only in my sheer lacy bralette in front of my best friend's crush. I flip around to face the man who can't take his eyes off of my warm skin, and in that instant my body reacts in a way that has never happened before. My body flushes, and my stomach fills with knots that I wish would untangle.

"Get out," I tell him sharply wishing I would've said it earlier because now he's locked on me and I'm frozen with new frightening emotions.

Asher leans against the bathroom door frame. A single piece of dark hair falls in his face making my hands itch to push it back. But I bite my lip and squeeze my nails into my fist to stop my actions. I hate how my body is having this reaction to someone I've barely talked to twice in my entire high school career.

"You do realize you're in my house, my room right?" he asks like it's funny I would ask him to leave.

My eyes narrow in on this cocky son of a bitch. "Either leave or get me a shirt," I demand as the timid demeanor that usually fills my body is filled with another person all together. Someone who isn't me, but someone who wants to come out in Asher's presence. Come alive, and it's weird and odd and somehow exciting. But I push it all away immediately.

He walks away so I leap towards the door to shut it when his hand stops the door just as quickly, and pushes the door back in on myself. "What are you doing?" I shriek and my hands go back up in attempts to cover my chest. My bralette is extremely see through and I don't like the way Asher's eyes continuously land on my damp and tacky chest.

"Here," he says as his hand shoves a T-shirt into my face.

A small, "Oomph," flies from my lips but I hastily slide it on to cover my half naked body.

"Thanks," I mumble as I grab onto my wet and suds filled top.

He lifts a single shoulder in a shrug but says nothing as his eyes continue to look at me, watch me. His eyes rake over every clothed clad inch of my body. Though it's not in a creepy I-want-to-get-you-naked-way, it's more in a curious way. Like he's intrigued by my presence and wants to learn more.

"What's your name?" Asher asks as he continues to lean against the doorframe of the bathroom with obviously no plan to move anytime soon leaving me stuck in the small room with him.

I wet my dry lips as nerves begin to slowly eat their way through me. A man I've barely spoken to or looked at is suddenly a mere inches away from me, and intently watching me makes me begin to question not only him but myself.

"Maeleigh," I breathe watching his light grey eyes begin to twist into a dark cloudy storm. A storm I realize I would eagerly throw myself into, so I take a step so my body is once again grazing the sink.

"Hmm..." he murmurs with pursed lips.

"What?" I question as my hands begin to tug at the hem of my, well I guess his, shirt.

"Interesting name," is all he comments.

"Okay," I trail dragging out the single word.

His lips twist in a smirk that makes me pulse race. "So Maeleigh," he pauses emphasizing my name, making my heart stop at the sound of my name on his lips. My name may be different, but it's never been anything special to me, until this moment. Until he made it sound special. "What are you doing in my bathroom?"

I cough to clear the small lump in my throat. "My shirt...um...someone spilled on my shirt," I sputter out as I feel my cheeks flush hot with embarrassment.

Asher takes a step forward suddenly making me realize that I have nowhere to go. My backside is already pressed up against the sink and my heart aches to leap out of my chest to run away from these feelings that attempt to weasel their way into my body. My eyes wash over his dark jeans that cling to him in a way no jeans should ever hug a man, because it should be illegal to look that good in just a simple pair of jeans. His grey shirt that matches his eyes that embraces his body in a way that leaves very little to my imagination.

God, everything about him makes my skin crawl with a need that my body has never felt before. Asher has always been someone I've seen from a distance, someone I've never wanted to get to know because he was Francesca's. In my eyes he always belonged to her, so why even cast him a second glance?

But now I'm seeing him up close and I don't know how to handle it. I don't know how to handle this feeling of want that fills my bones.

Asher closes the distance between us so that his body lightly brushes mine causing tiny sparks to fill the air around us and the air to fill my lungs. Everything stops as I take in this man's dark hair and eyes and sharp cheeks and nose that have me convinced he would cut me if he kissed me.

Oh, if he kissed me.

The thought of his lips pressing into mine have my heart running into overdrive until I'm sure I might be having a full blown heart attack. My body has never acted this way in my entire life and it scares me and has me wanting more all at once. I'm curious. Beyond curious as to why he elicits this kind of reaction within me. Why Asher? Why now? Just, why?

His hand reaches out to sit on the ledge to the left of me as he partially cages me into his body. His warmth, his kindling, and his soon to be flames wallow behind him just waiting to burn me alive.

His eyes fall to my lips for a single second before catching my eyes and pulling me in. My mouth parts and my eyes become heavy as I let myself fall into him and wait for his lips to meet mine.

Seconds drag feeling like years as I continue to wait.

"If you could leave that would be great," I hear suddenly, loudly, and everything in between breaks the moment. His words douse the almost flames, and kill the sparks that made me tingle.

"What?" I breathe as my eyes fly open and my skin runs cold as I realize he's back into the doorway further away from me.

"Well I have someone meeting me up here so..." he trails as he tosses a thumb behind himself motioning to his bedroom door.

My mouth falls open in not only disbelief, but also the original taste of disgust and annoyance that is Asher Lawton comes back. But this time is worse. The bitterness burns against my tongue as I fight to hold back the punch I want to land on this asshole in front of me.

"Whatever," I grumble as I push past him and make my way out of his bedroom door and into the corner of the hallway.

What a fucking douche, is all that runs through my mind.

But somewhere, deep in the back of my mind, something wakes up and flickers, and I am all too aware that Asher won't just be anyone to me anymore.