~Legolas finds out about the Haradrim Book and one thing leads to another.~

~♕~

"It is alright to cry."

– Baymax, Big Hero 6

~♕~

29. Book

Lasriel flinched guiltily, closing the book with a snap. "Uh, just a book." She tried to sound neutral.

"I can see that."

Thankfully he didn't press her further about it, and didn't try to peek either. She started to breathe calmer. Having to explain about the Haradrim book would be beyond mortifying.

When she was just about to return it to its hiding place, she felt Legolas remove his arm from around her.

Secrets. He hated secrets, and yet here she was, hiding things from him again. He was probably disappointed or even angry. But must one share everything in a marriage? It was not like this secret was bad, or hurtful in any way. Quite the opposite.

She hesitated, hand still on the book. If she showed it to him, that would mean she trusted him not to make fun of her, and she was certain he would appreciate that. Maybe it would be worth the embarrassment?

"Do you want to see it?" she muttered uncomfortably.

"Only if you want me to."

"Not really."

"Then I won't pry. 'A Couple's Guide to a Happy Marriage' says it is important for spouses to be allowed their privacy. One must not share everything."

He was unknowingly echoing her thoughts, and somehow the whole situation suddenly made Lasriel want to laugh. They were both using books to improve their marriage, and since Legolas was open about his guidebook then perhaps she could be too.

Mutely she passed the book to him.

As she heard him slowly turn the pages, she squirmed with embarrassment, wishing she could pull the comforter over her face – which probably had become crimson.

She couldn't stand the silence. Peeking over her shoulder, she noticed his eyes were large and his cheeks pinker than usual.

His flustered look made her feel braver. "You are quiet."

"Well, I'm just a bit surprised." His voice was hoarse. "I didn't know there were books about... uh... bedding. So this is where you got all the ideas? Bathing together, kissing the neck..."

"Aye."

Another moment of uncomfortable silence ensued.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked at last.

"Many things."

"What things?"

"Well, for one... I don't like that you hid this from me. But I can certainly understand why... Like I said, you don't have to share everything."

So then her intuition had been right about his reaction before; though he respected her right to have secrets, he also still disliked them. It made her glad she had gone against her first instinct and not hidden the book yet another time.

He moved closer, putting his arm back around her waist. "For how long did you even have it?"

"Don't know, a few months?"

"Oh."

"Sorry I hid it. I know it wasn't really necessary but... well, you saw it too. It is kind of... Uh."

He snorted. "Aye. Very." He began to move his hand upwards along her stomach, still bare after their lovemaking.

Maybe the book had given him ideas too? The thought sent a tingle into her and a longing to continue what they did earlier. Possibly in that cow position.

"You said you thought of many things," she said, feeling her heart beat faster. "What else did you think of?"

"Uh... just things." He moved his hand further up, cupping her breast.

"Such as?"

"Hmm... I imagined you reading that book and planning to do all those things with me." He nipped her ear, pressing himself against her backside. "That was... alluring."

"Oh..."

He nipped her ear again and followed its contour with the tip of his tongue. "And I thought that I want to borrow it."

"Can you read Haradrim?" she breathed, heart pounding.

"Nay, but I can read images and those weren't hard to interpret."

"I suppose not, no..."

"Lastly, I thought about that page you looked at... and that I want to do it with you like that, and for some reason the thought is insanely arousing and I think I will come in my underwear if I can't do it very soon."

She choked on her giggle.

"What are you thinking?" he countered.

"I thought of how insanely arousing it is when you whisper such things in my ear."

"Is it now? Then, by all means..." He lowered his voice to a husky murmur and began to count all the things he wanted to do to her, in every spicy detail.

As Lasriel listened, the desire grew within her into a burning inferno of need. "Shall we begin?"

But not until she was so turned on she could hardly breathe did he finally let his words be followed by action. Turning her over like in the picture, with a couple of pillows for support, he positioned himself behind her.

"I won't last long," he warned.

"I don't care."

"Valar!" Releasing all restraint, he pushed fast and hard, pressing her roughly forward against the pillows.

The friction made the itch build within her, similar to what she had felt before, though never as intensely. She had been so ready this time, her body so prepared, and now Legolas' lack of control was adding to her pleasure.

A new sensation suddenly flooded through her, making her shake and tremble, unable to move or even breathe until the intense feeling had passed.

Was this how it was supposed to be? It had felt amazing.

Behind her, Legolas groaned something inarticulate and became still with his own release.

When they breathed calmer again, she turned around so she could kiss him. "I had no idea it could feel so good! Thank you."

"Thank you," he countered, kissing her back. "And now I feel guilty... I have always experienced pleasure from this." After a brief hesitation, he added. "I knew you didn't like it. That it hurt. And I knew you lied about that."

She dropped her gaze. Could he read her that easily? No wonder he had been so annoyed whenever she lied. "I should have told you," she mumbled, mortified.

He turned her chin up and gave her a soft kiss on the lips. "I should have asked."

The kiss gradually grew more intense, and to Lasriel's surprise new lust miraculously formed within her. Would she never be tired of this now?

Not that she complained. She couldn't wait to feel that extraordinary pleasure again.

"I'm so grateful for the book," she said when they made a pause to catch their breaths. "I only wish we had had it from the start, then I probably would have always liked the act. It ought to be translated to Sindarin and Westron and handed out to all newlyweds."

"In a less forward version then. Those pictures are a bit..." He broke off.

"Maybe, aye." A thought struck her. "But by now the two of us could write our own book. 'A Couple's Guide to a Happy... Intimacy'?"

He chuckled. "Sounds perfect. Then my advice would be to communicate. To tell your partner what you like and dislike. To be honest."

Lasriel pondered for a bit. "My advice would be to wait and not be intimate until you really want to. Not because you want a child, or think you should. Only do it when you can't resist. I think we have been rushing it."

"You are probably right, and I don't mind taking it slower from now on. Like we just did. I enjoyed seeing your face turn all red when I whispered dirty words in your ear."

"I bet you did." She boxed his shoulder to take his impish smirk off.

Her chest swelled, making her nearly giddy with happiness. She could hardly believe they were finally able to talk honestly to each other. To joke and tease just like when they were kids.

Legolas turned serious. "The past is in the past, and we can't change it, but I say – let us make the future better."

She nodded earnestly. "Aye. Let us."

~♕~

What had begun physically with the kisses and exciting lovemaking was turning into another kind of pleasure. Lying face to face, joking and talking was enjoyable in a different way.

Looking at Lasriel now, Legolas felt as if she was both someone completely new and the same elleth he had married – impulsive and secretive, beautiful but not very feminine – and suddenly he had an urge to get to know her better.

"So, apparently you are an expert in bed and also a mason. Is there anything else about you I didn't know? You make me curious."

His question was rewarded with a surprised smile. "Really?"

"Really."

"Well, I like to fix things. I mean, if something is broken or working badly I like to make it better. Such as when I weaved reed mats to seclude the privy ditch, or when I mended our leaking roof in the old house."

He nodded encouragingly, trying to hide a slight pang of remorse. Now that she mentioned it, he recalled being pleasantly surprised by the sheltering screens when they first appeared, but he had never stopped to ask himself who made them, and as for the roof, he had not even noticed it had stopped leaking.

Had he really been so distracted? That could explain why she had seemed unhappy; it must have been hard doing all that work, unseen and unappreciated.

"I also like to read, as you know," she continued. "But actually I'm not much into romances like the 'Gone With the Elf' book..."

"Ouch! Don't remind me of that."

"I'd much rather read books that teach me new things, such as new inventions, or about different places and cultures." Her eyes grew wistful. "I long to travel the world. I never liked being confined at home."

"But you knew I needed my wife to keep my house. Then why did you want to marry me?"

"I... I hoped that would change. That if you saw what I could do, you would let me help you in the forest. But I suppose I was a bit naive... I know now why you needed me to be that kind of wife, but back then I didn't understand. And also..." Her cheeks colored and she looked away. "When I saw you again after so long, all grown up and... Well, I just wanted to be with you, I guess."

"So you only chose me because you found me attractive." Legolas couldn't say why the thought hurt so much.

"Not at all," she said hurriedly. "I mean, I do find you attractive, obviously, but most of all it was because of how fun we used to have together and I missed that so much. I missed you. My best friend."

His throat tightened. "I am not that ellon anymore."

"Why wouldn't you be? I don't think I have changed much."

"But you never experienced a war. You stayed." Now it was his turn to break eye contact. "You say you want to see the world... Well, I did. I saw how ugly it can be. How ugly people can be. Even myself..." He sighed deeply. "After that, I can't go back to who I was."

He felt Lasriel stroke away a tear from his cheek and realized he was crying.

"And even now, when it is over and the Dark One defeated, it has been so hard."

"Hard, how?" When he hesitated, she added: "No secrets, remember?"

As if a dam within him had broken, he spilled everything then; how he had struggled with the colony and with money, how it had felt when the plants just kept dying. He even told her how many times he had wanted to give up and sail west.

"After all this, I have become a boring, grumpy elf," he concluded. "I don't know who I am anymore."

Lasriel had kept stroking his face while he talked. "I think you are still you," she said softly. "Child-you, I mean. At least when you are with Gimli, and you laugh together and make jokes. That's the Legolas I remember."

"You think so?"

She nodded, biting her lip. "I was jealous of it. I wanted you to be that way with me too..."

They fell silent, but then she suddenly bounced up. "I have an idea! Let us take tomorrow off and just be together."

"You mean, in bed?"

"That, and we could talk and read books, and... I could teach you chess. It would be like in the old days."

The old days? Those were gone forever and trying to get them back was futile.

Legolas tried not to make his pessimism shine through when he replied. "It sounds fun, but I don't think I can. There is so much work, and–"

"Don't you have a foreman? And new workers who are arriving from Lothlórien any day now. They got this. And you deserve a break. Please. It is for your own good, you know."

Her eager smile and genuine consideration made his chest full of an emotion he couldn't define. It made him want to kiss her – and so he did.

"Alright then," he replied a long while later. "But just one day."

A/N:

Talking and having fun together are what these two need. :) More fluff coming up!