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CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN:
A momentary ceasefire.
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Aki wasn't sure when it had happened, but at some point, they had moved from the floor and made their way to the couch. Aki was beneath Chuuya, her legs wrapped around his hips, pulling the lower half of his body into her. Chuuya had one of his elbows leaning against the cushions, propping himself up, the other clutching her face tightly as he kissed her. The blanket they'd had over them had fallen down by his feet, only covering his calves but it didn't matter, neither of them were cold anymore.

Chuuya pulled away from her lips, moving his mouth down her cheek and to her neck, peppering her with sweet kisses, "Say you love me." He whispered against her skin, needing to hear it again. His entire body ached to hear it—his soul was screaming for it. Each time she spoke those three words, he could feel parts of his internal wounds being healed. It was as if he was a child, hearing those words for the first time in his life. He couldn't get enough of it.

Aki tangled her fingers through his damp hair, pulling him closer, "I love you." She told him on command—but it didn't have to be an order for her to say it. She would say it whenever she felt like it from that moment forward. Anytime she felt the need to express those words, she would do it.

"Fuck," Chuuya breathed into her neck before pulling back, his hand cradling her face. "I love you so much." He confessed before capturing her lips in his, making her grip tighten on his hair.

Somehow, she found the strength to pull her fingers out of his soft hair to trail down his spine over his sweater before reaching the hem. She gave it a tug, telling him what she wanted without words. He managed to remove his lips from hers to sit back, grabbing his sweater with one hand, pulling it over his head before discarding it on the floor. Aki's lips parted, taking in the cuts and bruises on his chest—cuts and bruises she had inflicted. She sat herself up from beneath him, rubbing her palms across his skin, making him shiver. She traced her fingertips above the horizontal gash on his chest she had cut with the glass, partly feeling guilty. But they had both seriously hurt each other in that moment of madness—and it was something they would never do again.

She leaned forward, kissing just above the wound before taking his hands in hers. She trailed them across her chest, letting his palm feel the curve of her breasts before lowering them to her stomach. Knowing what she was getting at, his fingers gripped the material of his sweater—which had looked so fucking good on her. He yanked it over her head, her hair spilling out around her bare shoulders as he tossed it to the side. It was his turn to look at the damage that had been done. She had bruises more than anything, especially around her ribcage. He swallowed hard. He promised himself they could be as big of monsters as they wanted to be—but never to each other ever again.

He kissed her, their lips connecting with small gasps leaving their lips. His hands moved around her back, feeling jagged spots where her back was cut before he unhooked her bra, allowing it to fall down her arms and chest before she tossed it away. It landed a little dangerously close to the fire, but neither of them paid it any attention. He pushed her back gently, making her back land against the pillows, her hair engulfing them. He picked up a strand, dancing it through his fingers as she stared at him, watching the glazed look in his eyes.

"Everything about you is perfect. So fucking perfect." He told her, dropping the hair onto her chest before his hands moved to her hips, grabbing a fistful of the material of the pyjama bottoms. She lifted herself, allowing him to pull them down her legs, adding them to the pile of clothes on the floor. He then pulled down his sweatpants and boxers in one go—or what was supposed to be one go. They got caught on his ankles, making it hard for him to get off.

Aki couldn't help it, she found herself giggling, "Jesus fucking Christ." Chuuya hissed, fighting with the sweatpants, though he too was laughing, a smile on his face.

After a few more moments, the sweatpants came loose and he kicked them off, sending them a nasty glare, making Aki laugh once again. He leaned over her, planting a soft kiss to her forehead, "I'm just gonna look for a condom, I'll be back in a—"

Before he could move, Aki caught onto his wrist, stopping him, "You don't have to." She said, surprising the man. He found himself gawking at her. Was she crazier than he thought? Of course he wanted to be inside of her without a condom, but with everything that was going on in their life, it was incredibly reckless. They couldn't risk sex without protection, especially not with the lives they led.

Aki scoffed. "Don't look at me like that, dumbass," She scolded before shrugging, but she wouldn't meet his eyes. "I'm not trying to baby-trap you, don't worry—"

"Aki." He warned her in annoyance, telling her to get to the point upon noticing her sudden shift in body language. She was more tense than she was a few moments before, when her laughter had been floating in the air. He wanted to know what had caused the sudden change.

The woman beneath him sighed, "I can't get pregnant," Her words surprised him even further, making his lips part into an 'O' shape. She squirmed beneath him, picking up her hair and fiddling with it. "It's, uh, it's a procedure back at the Double A. The moment we're of age they take out all of our reproductive organs. The women can't get pregnant and the men can't get anyone pregnant." She explained as he stared at her, not knowing what to say.

It sounded like such a cruel thing to do to a person, especially before the age they could decide if they want children. But it made sense, he could understand their sick reasoning—they couldn't risk their assassin's being more loyal to something else other than them. And they would certainly be more loyal to any child they bore. It was a good awful thing, taking away someone's free will like that just so their loyalty would stay rooted to them. It made Chuuya sick.

Aki looked at him, taking in his expression, "Does that bother you?" Me? He thought in confusion. He wasn't even thinking of himself. He was thinking of her—of how it must have been such an awful thing to go through at a young age. What if she wanted children in the future? The ability to birth her own child had been taken from her. Of course, there were other methods of having a child, but he still thought it incredibly unfair that something so sacred had been taken from her, even if it wasn't something she wanted in the future. It should have been her decision to make.

He shook his head, reaching down to touch her face sincerely, "It doesn't bother me. I just—I can't imagine how that must feel. Even if you didn't want kids, it must still really hurt and it must have been a scary thing to go through," He said, his voice coming out gentle, his eyes watching her with such adoration. He clutched her face in his hands, pulling her towards him. "Aki, I'm so sorry." He apologised, as if it was his fault, feeling the weight of it on his own shoulders. He hated the idea of her ever being afraid—of ever being sad. It made his chest ache.

Aki blinked as she stared at him, her nose burning, "It's fine. It's not a big deal anyway," She shrugged it off, swallowing hard. "I mean, what need would I have with a kid, huh? It would be stupid. I'm not the type of person who's supposed to be a mother." She assured him, not wanting him to feel bad for something that had been out of his control—and her control.

Chuuya's gaze softened, "Then why are you crying?" Aki's heart dropped. I'm crying? She hadn't been aware of it. But when she reached up and touched her cheek, she could feel the dampness where tears lay.

What the fuck?

"I—" She halted her words in her throat, feeling it seize up. She shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut. "I'm not crying because of that. I just—what if you love me less because of this? What if you want kids someday? I can't—I can't give you that, Chuuya. I'm useless, I—"

Chuuya grabbed her face, pulling her to sit upwards beneath him, "Stop that," He ordered, his face inches from hers as she stared at him in disbelief, tears slipping down her cheeks. "You are not useless, okay? This doesn't make me love you any less. I still love you just as much as I did a few seconds ago. And I do want kids someday—someday when all of this shit is over and life isn't so crazy. And if anyone is going to be their mother, it is going to be you." Aki stared at him, her jaw loose, eyes wide like flying saucers.

"But I can't... I can't give you that." She said in defeat, the tears slipping from her eyes, running down her cheeks.

Chuuya smiled at her, brushing his thumbs against her wet skin, "I'm a kid from the slums, Akira. I'm not above adoption." He assured her, making her eyes grow wider. Oh, how she loved him. No matter the flaw, he accepted it over and over again. He was everything to her—her person.

A sob escaped her lips before she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him into a kiss. She held onto him for dear life, kissing him so hard it said everything she didn't say aloud. She was telling him she wanted those things and that she would have those things with him, perhaps not any time soon, but someday—just as he had said.

Aki pulled away, both of them breathless after the passion she had kissed him with, "Chuuya, I want you," She breathed out shakily, her fingers tugging on the ends of his hair. She brushed her nose against his. "Please. I need you." She was begging, she was more than aware of it. But she needed him with every fibre of her entire being. Her soul cried out for him. Her heart ached for him. She needed the man that put bandaids over her insecurities, making her existence more bearable.

Chuuya pulled her face to his, kissing her feverishly as he collapsed on top of her, sinking her back into the cushions beneath him. Aki hooked her legs around his hips, feeling him harden beneath him. He kissed all over her face, his lips soaking up her tears before kissing her neck. His fingers danced down her naked body, making her shiver. They stopped at the inside of her thighs before brushing against her entrance. He teased a finger, making her body react to his touch, her fingers curling tighter in his hair. He slipped a finger inside, moving in and out slowly, making a wetness cover his skin. Once he was satisfied by how wet she was, he pulled the finger out and replaced it with his tip, making her instinctively grind her hips upwards.

He brought his face away from her neck, pecking her lips. He pulled back, staring into her eyes, both of them breathing heavily before he slid into her. He went slow, more than aware she was still injured from their fight—as was he. Aki's mouth flew open, a gasp coming out from the back of her throat at the feeling of him inside her. The moment he was fully inside of her, a pleased exhale escaped his lips. She felt even better when there was nothing separating them—he could feel every inch of her, just as she could feel every inch of him.

Neither of them moved for a second, just holding eye contact before Chuuya took both her hands in his, holding them by the wrist. He lifted them above her head, pushing them gently into the pillow, crossing her wrists. He licked his lips, his eyes glazed as he stared at her naked body beneath him. And then he began sliding out, making her back arch a little before sliding back into her. Her head threw itself back, eyes squeezed shut as she took his entire length, squeezing around him. He began picking up the pace, but he didn't go hard. He was fucking her softly, his hand pinning her wrists above her head, her legs wrapped tightly around his hips.

"Fuck, Aki. You feel so good." He moaned, momentarily closing his eyes, enjoying the raw feeling of her. He could get lost in it—swim endlessly without ever coming up for air.

Aki arched herself off the couch, bringing her lower half up. She began moving in rhythm with him, her ass grinding against his thighs. He felt so good inside of her—better than before. It had every single electron in her body going crazy, making her head spin, her skin feeling like it was on fire. Both of them picked up the pace, moving a lot quicker before Chuuya's free hand left her stomach, hoisting her leg higher up his hip. A moan escaped her lips as he curved inside of her, hitting the sweet spot he had been aiming for. He kept up the pace, thrusting into her, both of them moaning messes.

Aki's fingers curled beneath his, wrapping around his index finger. The mere touch alone brought him closer. He lowered her leg, allowing himself to fall between them; his stomach meeting hers as his lips captured hers. Aki moaned into his mouth, detaching one of her hands from his, allowing her fingers to find his back, digging into his skin whilst his hips rubbed against her inner thighs.

They were both a sweaty mess, their skins sticking to each other. Neither of them came up for air once, their lips locked as their hips moved in sync. Aki's hand moved from his back, reaching up to curl around his choker, pulling him closer to her. Ragged breaths and moans left their lips as Chuuya picked up the pace, unable to hold back anymore. Aki arched her back, allowing him to slip deeper, her efforts rewarded when he began whimpering into her mouth. Holy shit. The sound of him was enough to make her clench around him, her release suddenly washing over her prematurely.

A cry of pleasure escaped her mouth when she tore her head back from him, pushing it further into the pillows. The pure sight and sound of her was enough for him to finish—completely crumbling against her, sharp moans falling from the back of his throat. He collapsed against her, but he didn't pull out. They lay there, with Chuuya on her chest, his eyes closed, breathing heavily. Aki stared up at the ceiling that was spinning through sleepy eyes, her cheeks flushed red. Both of them were in a daze, all fucked-out, suddenly realising how tired they both were.

Aki exhaled shakily, "You asshole," She grumbled, bringing her face to his hair, resting against his head. "I could have lasted way longer if you didn't start whimpering like that. I mean, do you even know what it does to a woman?" She complained, her legs still wrapped around him as he lay on top of her, eyes closed, breathing quickly.

"Oh, yeah? How do you think I feel with you moaning like that? How's a guy not supposed to finish when you sound that good?" He retorted, his voice muffled from his lips being pushed against the bare skin on her chest.

Aki laughed, "I guess we both have a point." She concluded.

Chuuya's head perked up a little, "Wait, did we just unintentionally come to a ceasefire?" He asked, blinking in disbelief.

Ali scoffed, "A momentary ceasefire." She corrected.

Chuuya pushed his face back into her chest, closing his eyes before agreeing with her, "A momentary ceasefire."

AUTHORS NOTE.

have i said that i love them???

— taylor xx