Still in my coat, I stood alone, off to the side by a high-top table, swizzling the cocktail straw around in my cranberry and ginger ale. Felicity was at the far end of the bar toasting with her stage manager. She had already introduced me to everyone in the cast and crew, except for Kyle, who wasn't there.

"Maybe I'll get lucky and he won't show," I thought.

In the flurry of greetings and handshakes, I hadn't asked Felicity if he would be coming. Mostly because I wanted to stall the inevitable. Once I said his name to her, I'd have to tell her that Kyle had been my bad date. But this felt like something I should disclose more privately. In the middle of a packed bar, during her opening night celebration certainly wasn't ideal.

Plus, a large part of me didn't want to find out what had happened, or was happening, between the two of them. Ignorance is truly bliss sometimes.

A ruckus sounded by the front door, but even on tiptoes I couldn't see through the crowd enough to figure out what it was about. The mass of patrons shifted closer, threatening to push me into the table. I gave up looking and turned back to my drink, leaning down slightly to sip through the straw.

Suddenly, a body brushed against mine and before I could react, that distinctive voice was in my ear, hot and whiskey laced. "Take your coat off and stay awhile."

The shock made my last sip go the wrong way. Carbonation tickled my sinuses. I coughed, and Kyle stepped back, offering me space to catch my breath. I swirled around to face him. My back pressed against the table's edge as I recovered my voice. "I can't."

Kyle inched closer again. His hazel eyes held a languid and liquid expression that I'd never seen on him before, but knew well from other faces.

He's drunk.

Placing his rocks glass next to mine, he leaned one arm on the table beside me. Now that he wasn't speaking directly into my ear, he raised his voice. It was slow and deliberate, but not slurred. "You can't?" He bowed his head and brought his mouth near my ear again, voice husky. "Or you won't?"

In that already warm bar, with his body entirely too close and emanating heat like a furnace, I wanted to take off my coat. I wanted to stay with him, or more accurately be with him. But not there.

My face flushed and my ears burned. I looked away from his eyes, toward the place where Felicity had been moments ago. My lips compressed in a tight line.

He lifted his head, and I shifted around so we weren't in danger of touching any longer. But now I was facing him, which might have been worse. Kyle brought a hand up to my collar, but stopped just short of making contact. His fingers hovered there for a moment, while his eyes searched mine.

I huffed. "You're drunk."

He dropped his hand and shrugged. "A little."

"Why?" I asked.

"Liquid courage," he said with grimace.

"What do you need liquid courage for?" I shirked off my coat. With no stool nearby to hang it on, I hugged it to my chest.

Kyle pulled it from my arms, folded it in half and draped it across the table behind our drinks. "People," he said with a smile.

I shook my head. "You were just on stage in front of a theatre full of people, and they loved you."

He shook his head back at me. "They loved a character. Not me."

"They loved how you, became the character."  To emphasize my words, I poked my index finger into his firm chest. Which I couldn't stop picturing bare now that I had that memory to conjure.

Kyle glanced down at my finger, and then back up to my eyes. "Maybe I needed courage to face just one particular person."

I couldn't bring myself to ask the obvious question. When I'd probed too much on our date, things had imploded between us. Instead, I pulled my hand away, narrowed my gaze, and asked, "Did you switch schedules to avoid me?"

He chuckled. "Nights worked better for my schedule, with rehearsals and all. I'll be back on days now that the show opened."

He picked up his whiskey and downed the remains. When he lowered the glass, his lips were moist with the amber liquid. My body felt like I'd been the one who'd swallowed that shot. Fire coiled through me. I turned away from Kyle again, clutching the edge of the table with both hands. Staring into its glossy top at my blurry reflection only made me me feel like I was the one who was drunk. Or maybe that was his effect on me. I chided myself internally.

Get a grip Rosie!

Kyle put his empty glass down on the table and cleared his throat. "I hope you know, I wasn't bored on our date."

I looked up at him with raised eyebrows. "Oh?"

"I kept yawning because I'd been up late that whole week, memorizing lines." He put a hand on my elbow, gently shifting me to face him again.

"Oh." Relief washed over me, giving me the confidence to bring up something else about that night. "On our date, you said your hobby was running. You never mentioned acting."

He bit his lower lip for a second, before he said, "Because acting isn't my hobby."

"But..."

Kyle placed a hand on my cheek and brushed his thumb slowly across my lips, very effectively cutting off what I was about to say. It just about stopped my heart too.

He leaned slowly forward as he said, "It's what I want to do."

I should stop him, but I don't want to.

He came even closer. "For real."

He's really going to kiss me.

Still closer. "It's what I need to do."

I need this.

I placed a hand on his bicep, and angled my head more. He smiled in recognition of my willingness. "So I don't..."

Before Kyle finished speaking, our lips just on the precipice of connecting, Felicity's voice rang out from behind him.

"Kyle! There you are!"

I jerked backwards, removing all contact between us. Luckily I'd been concealed enough behind Kyle's broad form to obscure our actions. When Felicity spotted me, she squealed excitedly, but seemingly clueless to what had nearly happened.

Felicity bobbled on her high heels, spilling something from her glass. "So my awesome friend Ro, has finally met my amazing lead actor. Wasn't he the best tonight?" She threw an arm around Kyle's neck and tugged his head down enough to plant a huge kiss on his cheek.

He scowled, his face turning bright red. "We actually knew each other already."

"What? That's so crazy," she slurred.

"Maybe we should get you some water Fel," I said.

"Already on it." She thrust her glass under my nose so I could sniff.

"Oh good." I smiled at her, and tried not to look at Kyle, whose eyes I felt burning into me.

Felicity cocked her head, squinting appraisingly at us. Either she was seeing double, or maybe she was begin to feel the tension that threatened to shatter at any minute. "So how do you two know each other?" 

Kyle started to speak first. "We went..."

"Work," I shouted, stopping him from finishing that sentence. That can of worms was not being opened right then if I could help it. "We work together," I said more softly, but no less urgently.

Sneaking a glance at Kyle, I noted his furrowed brow and flared nostrils. His hazel eyes seemed more blue-toned than usual. Cold even. My stomach iced over.

If only I had gone directly home from the theatre like I wanted to. Now I dare not leave without risking Kyle telling her about our connection, before I could. The thought that his version of things might somehow damage my friendship with her, concerned me. I hoped that wouldn't be his intention. But given they were both intoxicated, and the number of misunderstandings and fights I'd witnessed under such circumstances, it felt like adding fuel to a potential fire.

The only thing I could do in that moment, was soften my eyes and give my head a little shake, hoping he'd use his acting skills to read my cues and not bring up our date. Lucky for me, Felicity's usually razor sharp mind was dulled quite a bit by her inebriated state.

"Speaking of work," Felicity said, "I'm getting Kyle into voiceovers with me. He'll make tons of money off that sexy baritone of his." She dropped her hand from his shoulder to pat his back, then trailed it lower. My heart stuttered. When she stopped at his belt, it returned to a steady, albeit too fast, rhythm. The damned organ seemed to want to climb out of my body. It felt like it was creeping up into my throat.

"That's great. You won't have to keep doing stock work." I plastered a smile on my face. The edges of my lips quivered under the strain.

"You're not getting rid of me that quickly. I have a very big reason to stay at Homey-O-Station." Kyle smirked and shifted his weight, turning his back toward the table. Felicity's hand fell away, and I tried my best to swallow the lump in my throat.

"I can't possibly imagine what that might be," I said.

"I bet you can," he said.

His eyebrows lifted. Haughty expectation written across his face. My blood pressure rose even more in response, making my voice sound strangled. "Well I don't gamble, so I'm not going to take that bet."

Felicity interjected, "I like gambling. But I honestly have no clue why anyone would want to work at Homey-O-Station."

Kyle's eyes darted from Felicity, to me, then back to her. "Health insurance."

Whether what he said was the truth, or not, I should have been relieved that he was keeping our little secret. But I only felt even more agitated.

Felicity scrunched up her face and said, "I didn't think the health insurance was that good there. Rosie's got the hospital bills to show for it. Isn't that right Ro?"

Despite being poor my whole life, my lack of money, was never a topic that I felt comfortable discussing with others. I nodded. The loud music did little to mask the awkward silence that grew between us. Felicity stepped closer to Kyle. Her breasts pressed into his left arm.

Feeling very much like a third-wheel, I averted my eyes, but the crowd held nothing of interest for me and my brain couldn't focus on anything other than what must be going on behind me. Felicity's laughter rang out. Whether from something Kyle said, or did, I couldn't guess. He'd never made me laugh like that.

My heart raced, and my legs ached to move. Every cell within my body screamed to escape that bar, right that minute. Feeling slightly safe in my assumption that Kyle wasn't going to tell Felicity that we were something more than coworkers, but less than whatever they might be, I decided it was time for me to leave.

Too afraid to see anymore of what was happening between them, I swiveled my head in their direction with eyes closed, and said, "I'm really tired and I have an early shift tomorrow. I... I think I should go home."

When I opened my eyes, they were in much the same posture as before, but both had inscrutable expressions on their faces, which I chalked up mostly to their drunkenness. And somewhat to my lack of desire in reading them, since I was terrified of what the subtext held.

I reached across the table for my coat, but Kyle scooped it up before I could grab it. "I'm ready to go too. We can share a ride. My treat."

He shook out my coat, not unlike a matador waving the red flag for a bull. But I know that behind that flag there's always a hidden sword. It felt like I was bleeding internally already. Nothing good could come from being alone with Kyle.

"Oh. I um... maybe I should stay until Felicity is ready to go." I placed my hand on my coat.

At the sound of her name, Felicity stood up straighter. "If you're both leaving, I may as well go too. Let me grab my things. Meet you out front." She placed her water on the table, and squeezed back into the throng of bodies.

"I should help her get them."  I tugged my coat, but Kyle didn't release it from his grasp.  Felicity bounced off people like a pinball, ricocheting towards the other side of the barroom.

"She's fine." Kyle's firm voice cut through the din around us, commanding my attention again.

My eyes searched his, looking for a bit of concern for Felicity there. Instead he seemed entirely focused on me. Hunting for something as well. What that was I didn't know.

He said, "Not everyone needs your help."

"Friends help each other." I glanced down to his hands which still held my coat.

"I know how friendship works. I do have friends." He took a step closer.

The tension in my arm slackened. I sighed. "Well that's good. I'd like it if we could be friends, at least."

"I don't need anymore friends." With a scowl he released my coat, before brushing past me, headed toward the front door.  A few people tried to say goodbye to him, but Kyle merely nodded at them while typing into his phone.

I followed in the wake he cut through the crowd.