The floorboards creaked beneath me as I walked through the house. I hadn't wanted to come back here but each day I could feel myself getting worse. Even now, the azoth was threatening to make me sick and I'd been losing chunks of time for the past two weeks. Waking up with Tim there to tell me what happened was one thing but it was another when I'd end up miles away coughing blood. I needed to know how to make it stop... Unfortunately Alastor was the only one who wasn't affiliated with Slenderman or The Operator who might have the answer.

"Tim is going to be pissed when he finds out where I went." I continued forward cautiously, listening for anyone else in the house.

"Well, this is unexpected..." Alastor purred as he entered the house behind me. "Seems you've come crawling back for answers."

I coughed and took a step away from him. "What's happening to me?"

"Slow down, Love." He grinned and circled me, his cloak wrapping around me from his close proximity to me. "...You know I like to have fun with things."

"I-"

"You're lucky I just came back from feeding... Which means I'm in a fairly good mood." He cut me off before I could respond. "Still, I don't see why I should help. What do I have to gain from this? If anything I have more to gain by summoning my dear friend here to collect you- I believe you've met him."

"...HABIT." I growled out the name. "Of course you'd be friends with that psychopath."

"We used to team up on the occasion, breaking victims down physically, mentally, and emotionally... But it grew tiring- too easy- so we parted ways."

I glanced behind me, wondering if I could make it to a window in time if things went wrong. Alastor pulled me closer against him, the wicked smile still on his face. "I was only joking, Pawn... You really shouldn't worry so much. Ethan would never stop nagging me if I did that to you."

"S-so you'll help?" I pushed away, disliking being so close to him.

"Like I said, I'm in a good mood." He released me and beckoned me to follow after him. "Let's sit down, this could be a lot of exposition."

"Great..." I didn't fully trust the demon but also decided it was best to listen and follow along at the moment. "This could be the only chance I get..."

"So... I see you didn't bring your friend this time... Shame. The four of us could've had a fun time together." I didn't like the suggestion in his tone and given the flash of annoyance on his face as he rubbed his head, neither did Ethan. "...Anyway, I believe you asked what was happening to you. Well I think you already have some idea."

"...Then... I-I'm... going to become a proxy? No matter what?"

"No, no, no." He shook his head and ran a hand through his raven black hair. "You were born in the ARK- not that anyone other than your father could recall that- and that left you with a low level of azoth in your body composition. It gave you a sort of shield, or resistance, against operators that grew overtime alongside the exposure to them."

"Wouldn't that help him hold control over me?" I picked at the fabric on the dusty chair.

"If you weren't born inside the ARK, yes, possibly- assuming HABIT didn't keep you to join his experiment like it was originally planned when he Inhabited you father to create you." His grin almost seemed to hold pity in it as he saw my expression shift to one of horror and disgust. "He didn't tell you that during your little sessions?"

I didn't have time to think of a response before he thankfully cut back to the point of my visit. "The fact you were born there was pure chance and the start of this new cycle with HABIT handing you over to your 'favorite' faceless man to toy with."

"I was fucked from the start. Either I was in HABIT's game or this one.It makes sense now, how my father knew." A darker thought crossed my mind. "What if I'm going to become like that psychopath?"

Alastor had continued rambling while I numbly registered the first flood of information."-n fact about me Sweetheart, I tried making a little deal with you in that first cycle before Ethan ever summoned me. Sensed your pain, the potential to break you down and watch your sanity chip away... Didn't realize you were claimed by the octo-twig."

He laughed and stared at me, as if unfazed by the situation- he probably wasn't. "But between the weird mortal DNA you have, the azoth embedding at birth like that, and your little mark? No, you couldn't become a proxy unless you bent to his will, like in some iterations."

"Then what is happening?" I tried to keep the growl out of my voice. All I needed was a straightforward answer. "Just please don't tell me I'm turning into a monster like HABIT."

"Simple. You were injected by more azoth than your body was used to all at once. The mark you have was meant to keep Thing One and Thing Two from touching you, so when the azoth was injected it took it as an attack from one of them- given it's similar to their blood." He leaned back and checked his nails before looking back at me. "You'll either die, slowly and painfully, or you'll become similar to us."

"...Us?" Cold crept through my body; he was going to say it.

"HABIT and myself. Not really overpowered operators like those two and myself but still powerful in our own ways, though with your mortal blood it'll obviously be watered down. That's why they wanted to boost you with azoth. To test and see if it could at least make you more formidable than a proxy yet still keep you powerless and obedient to them."

"Like... them..." My head felt clouded, unfocused, as I tried to sort through the questions and fear.

"Given your current state I'd say your system is still trying to figure out whether to reject this little experiment or not." His glowing stare bore into me. "It burns, doesn't it... Every time you're agitated. And it gets worse, and worse. You feel control slipping from you more often."

"H-how do I make it stop? How do I get rid of the azoth? I don't want to be a servant to those things!" I tightened my grip on the armrest. "I will not be a monster like him either!"

"You'd have to bleed out. Azoth regenerates quickly... So you could get rid of it, if you bled out completely. Every ounce would have to be drained out." A disgusted look crossed his face. "Not very pleasant, not to mention messy."

"...Is there anything I can do to stop it?"

"Why would you want to stop it? You could become something entirely new, something powerful even. I doubt they even know the limits yet- assuming this doesn't eventually dissipate with time."

"Did- Does, this have anything to do with how I managed to get from Rosswood to another place entirely- with two people- through the ARK?"

His gaze widened in genuine surprise. "You managed to manipulate the tears between the ARK and this world? Oh... that is an accomplishment- and with two people no less! Perhaps you won't die after all."

"Wow, thanks." I scoffed. "Pretty sure it almost killed me."

"Doubt that'll ever change. If anything it was pure luck it worked." Alastor stood up and gazed down at me. "Why on earth would you want to throw this chance away? ...Yes, I know, normal life... Some people just aren't born for that. She never was."

It took me a minute to understand the last part was him responding to something Ethan must've said in his head. Alastor noticed the look on my face and gave a frustrated sigh. "I'm not used to making illusions just to have a conversation with him alright, Darling? Typically we try ignoring each other- it's quite hard given our thoughts are shared."

"My soul being stuck in your body hasn't shrunk your ego. I'm surprised there's even space for me." A semi-transparent form of Ethan flickered into existence and solidified next to Alastor.

"Says the mortal with the audacity to strand me here in this- ugh, this form... I believe mortals would say it's like if you and I had a baby, right?" I awkwardly looked between the two of them as Alastor went on. "Good thing we're both attractive, otherwise I'd find a way to kill you- still, as the superior being here I brought everything that matters with me."

"Um..." I inched away, growing increasingly uncomfortable.

Alastor snapped his attention back to me. "Oh come on now, we weren't finished."

"You would be if you didn't ramble forever." Ethan sat next to me. "Ash, hear us out. We can't stop what's happening to you and there isn't a chance to redo this in another iteration... But we can help you."

"I'm not helping anyone, and given I'm the one in control of what we do- hah... superior being and all, you know- you won't be either." Alastor laughed as he looked down at us. "The only help I'll give is information. I don't need Slenderman coming after me for aiding you, especially when I know you'll turn and use it against him. Even at my full power I wouldn't want to start a war with him- between his powers, proxies, allies like the Collective or HABIT, and beasts... It just wouldn't end well."

"So... there's nothing I can do to stop... whatever is happening to me?" I glanced at Ethan, who dropped his gaze regretfully.

"He's telling the truth... I'm sorry, Ash." My cousin took a deep breath. "I wish I could help you- bear it for you- but I can't. It's a part of you know, all you can really do is fight it."

"What about what you told me before? About burning the ARK?"

"It wasn't a riddle if that's what you mean." Alastor circled back to his chair and sat down. "I literally mean, burn down the ARK. Azoth is very flammable- potentially explosive- and the mist you find on Slenderman's side is filled with it."

"Fantastic." I muttered. "So are you saying I'm a walking bomb?"

"No, you'll be fine- if you don't die of smoke inhalation, burn to death, or just get killed trying to burn the place down."

"You'll be fine... I should've given you more credit; all those years of being some overprotective cousin and here you are still fighting." I jumped slightly as Ethan hugged me. "Sorry, didn't mean to startle you. These illusions are really great huh? ...Just, don't give up now. Otherwise everything that's happened will mean nothing."

"Like your idiotic mistake." Alastor chimed in. "Or the deaths of everyone you cared about."

"Not helping."

I stood up and walked closer to the door. "He's right though. If I fail... there won't be justice for what happened... and if I'm stuck with dying horribly or turning into some monster like HABIT or a proxy then I'd rather die preventing them from destroying anyone else's life."

"Oh, Pawn..." Alastor seemed amused at my words. "It won't kill them let alone destroy the ARK. It'll only weaken them for a few life times at most if you're lucky."

"It'll still be something."

"Suit yourself... Just remember what I told you- like it or not you'll need others to help, willingly or otherwise." The golden-yellow gaze sent a chill down my spine as he followed me, turning me to face him once again. "I have one last piece of information I can give you... but it might come at a price."

"What do you mean?" I tried to back away but was prevented from doing so as he pulled me closer again. "Let go."

"Focus on who you are, and you should be fine. This could shed some light on getting out alive... or drive you mad and make it worse." His tone was deathly serious.

Ethan's form flickered over his shoulder. "Alastor... don't. She could die! It might kill her!"

Fear flooded through me at the panic in my cousin's voice and I once again tried to jerk away. In front of me, Alastor's figure shifted, growing taller as three horns grew from his head like a demonic crown while a third, golden eye blinked open. The stare was almost hypnotizing. I didn't even notice his lips brush against my forehead until agonizing pain ripped through my skull. The daze was shredded and I stumbled back. Different lives seemed to be flashing through my mind. Spikes of pain shot through me with each death, as if they were all happening at once.

Gunshots rang out from around me, bullets piercing through my torso like it was wet paper. Another went through my skull. I was blinded. Crimson bathed everything as my sight returned. Confusion struck me; I should be dead. No, I was perfectly fine... A knife slashed into me. Several more strikes following after. Dazed, I could barely make out voices of old friends. They called this mercy. They screamed about betrayal. Their cries deemed this revenge. I was helpless against them. I couldn't kill those I cared about and they knew it.

What did they know? A dark laugh bubbled up as I got to my feet. Strength flowed through me as if the wounds never occurred. Death fell upon them. My life was littered with the fallen from the start. My mother- murdered by my father. Killed in an accident. Faith's life gushed out as I left her to die. My father begged me to stop as I turned against him and watched his beaten form burn alive. One by one my friends disappeared. No longer a mystery to what might've happened. They were weaknesses I couldn't afford. And a sickening glee seeped into my mind with each round of bloodshed. It pained me to watch yet I couldn't control my actions. She wanted me to suffer and claimed to be making me stronger.

Agony tore through me. Lives rushing through my mind as I once again died time and time again. No matter how many I killed someone was always left to finish me off. And yet it wasn't over. I'd wake up in another life all for it to run its course to a cruel fate. There didn't seem to be an end.

Alastor stepped back, his form reverted back to its previous look, his eyes duller as if it had taken a lot out of him to do this. I could see he was speaking but couldn't hear anything over the jumble of memories in my head. At one point Ethan was next to me, seemingly shouting at the demon. Everything was growing fuzzy. The darkness threatened to drown me with the echoes of past iterations. Which memories were mine? Were any of these actually real? I was pulled under, swamped by the visions.