And now I'm all alone again, nowhere to go, no one to turn to. Without a home, without a friend, without a face to say hello to.

       Emily, once upon a time, had a home and had a family. She had an older brother who absolutely loved her, and who was very protective of her, to the point of embarrassment sometimes. She had a best friend, who was also a coworker, and who helped her train. She had an amazing husband, who treated her like the most beautiful woman in the universe, no matter what she looked like, and loved her simply because of her heart, and he loved her no matter what. But he had died. He had been on a mission with her brother, and he had fallen off a train. He was dead. The man who she had married ten days before he'd left, and the man who she planned to spend the rest of her life with.....He was gone. Now, she was simply a girl out of time. She was in Florida, in 2016, when she was supposed to be in the late 1940's. Nobody knew who she was, and nobody cared.

         And now the night is here, and I can make-believe he's here. Sometimes I walk alone at night when everybody else is sleeping. I think of him, and then I'm happy with the company I'm keeping.

          During the day, Emily would stay hidden in a small cave along the beach, moving elsewhere when the tide came in. But at night, she came out. She would wander the beach, remembering the days when she and James would slip away in the middle of the night, and they would simply wander through the city. She would simply walk along the beach, and she could almost feel his larger hand in hers, his thumb gently rubbing her hand as he led her around. When she thought of him, she didn't mind anymore. She didn't mind the fact that she was alone. Not as long as she had James with her, at least in her imagination.

        The city goes to bed, and I can live inside my head. On my own, pretending he's beside me. All alone, I walk with him til morning. Without him, I feel his arms around me, and when I lose my way I close my eyes......and he has found me.

         After everyone had disappeared, she would slip out onto the beach, happily living in the dream that she still had her husband with her. There had been a couple of times where she had lost track of time, and she had been out wandering the beach all night. When she closed her eyes, she could feel him sliding his hand into her small one, and she felt his arms wrap around her shoulders, hearing him whisper sweet words to her, his lips right beside her ear. She remembered the few nights they had together before he'd left.........And they had been pure bliss. The morning after the wedding, she remembered waking up beside him, and neither of them wanted to go anywhere. Steve had turned bright red when he'd gotten to their little apartment, and had found them still in bed.......and it didn't take a genius to know what had happened. She looked down at her left hand, seeing the two gold rings on her finger. One was a plain gold band, her wedding ring, and the other had three tiny diamonds, her engagement ring. She had refused to take those off, and when anyone tried to flirt with her, she would hold up her left hand, snapping at them that she was married.......But once her stomach started getting larger, she was finally left alone. 

       In the rain, the pavement shines like silver. All the lights, are misty in the river. In the darkness, the trees are full of starlight, and all I see is him and me forever and forever.

        She loved it at night, though, especially after it had rained some. The stars would come back even brighter, sparkling like diamonds, and they shone beautifully through the trees, reminding her of the nights that she had spent with Steve and James out by the river, just laying back and watching the stars. She still dreamed that they could, someday, manage to find each other again, but she knew it was impossible, simply because he was dead. 

        And I know it's only in my mind, that I'm talking to myself and not to him. And although, I know that he is blind, still I say there's a way for us.

        She would, so often, just sit back, gently rubbing her stomach, and talk to her baby, who would start kicking a lot more whenever she did that. She would also just start rambling, like she used to when he was around, and then she would catch herself, reminding herself that he wasn't there. Once upon a time, before they had started dating, she had flirted with him so often, and he would just flirt back, and to her, it seemed that he never noticing how much it hurt her when he flirted with other girls. But little did she know, he did notice, and it hurt him to see her hurting. 

        I love him, but when the night is over, he is gone, the river's just a river. Without him, the world around me changes, the trees are bare, and everywhere, the streets are full of strangers.

          Emily was slightly afraid of going out during the day, but she finally managed to make herself to out and get what she needed. Food, some new clothes, simple things that she just didn't have. When she did, though, it was a lot more terrifying than she had thought it would've be been. She had a lot of people who, as she went about what she had to do, stared at her, pointing, and the world seemed so much larger and scarier than it ever had with James by her side.

           I love him, but every day I'm learning, all my life, I've only been pretending. Without him, this world would go on turning, the world is full of happiness that I have never known.

          Every day, she grew more and more confident that she didn't matter anymore, that the world has moved on, and that it didn't matter whether she lived or died anymore. It hurt her to see the families walking along the beach, happy, smiling, and laughing, and that seemed so far away from her now. And it also seemed like she didn't know what it was like to be happy anymore, and it didn't seem like she couldn't ever be happy again.

           I love him.....I love him....I love him.....But only.....On my own.

Next one is going to be Spider-Man for Brentinator, and if you want more of Emily Barnes's story, that will be in my Avengers story, Somewhere In My Memory, if y'all are interested. Thanks for reading!