skeletal draft. may typos and errors pa here. apologies in advance.

part 1

Milly glances up at the unlit ferris wheel and turns back to him in confusion. Kai's pressing the remote key fob and double checks if the car's securely locked.

"Kai? They're closed na. Why did you bring us to Mystic pa?"

He places the remote in his pocket and takes her hand. "Nasa loob yung pupuntahan natin."

"Which is?"

"Yung venue."

"Venue? You rented a venue here? Why, did you invite other people?"

Kai watches the surprise and confusion on her face and smiles. "Just us. Let's go."

"Why not a restaurant na lang in Manila?" she says as he pulls her along with him.

He gives her hand a light squeeze. "You'll see."

Hands intertwined, he leads them past the guards and the main lobby all the way to the themed garden where different rides and attractions are strategically placed.

Milly's gaze wander around. She can't remember the last time she's been here and fascinatingly, it's also the first time she's seen the park way beyond working hours.

"Gusto mo bang sumakay?" Kai asks, slowing down, after he notices how her eyes linger a bit too long on the rollercoaster. "I can ask. Pwede naman."

"Not really. I'm not that fond of amusement parks," she says. "I just can't believe they let us come in pa."

The bigger attractions are no longer operational and some of the rides further along the park are already closed and in the dark.

But the rest of the lamps and some of the pathways are still lined by brightly-lit colorful lanterns that extended to various directions leading to different sides of the park, giving the surroundings an ethereal glow.

Even better, the magical garden at the heart of Mystic has been kept alive, ever so vibrant and mystical against the dark, that she wonders how Kai managed to make this possible

Her puzzled thoughts must have leaked onto her expression because Kai takes a look at her and smiles again.

"Wala akong ginastos dito. They offered initially to let us use all the rides for two hours for free. But they want you to be their brand ambassador for a year. I said no. I'm not going to ask you to work."

"How do you even know the management of Mystic? Your family's connections?"

"Oo. Kliyente namin. We're helping them construct a private property in Batangas. I inquired for the rate of the venue hall but they gave it for free. Magbabayad naman talaga ako."

"For free? Strange. Sa current state ng mundo natin now, nothing's ever free anymore. Laging may kapalit."

"They're your fans, that's why."

Milly hums. "Then we should thank them. I'll do a free PR for Mystic after siguro." She adds, "Why did you want their venue though? Marami naman sa Manila?"

Kai doesn't answer anymore.

And after he opens the doors and takes her inside the function hall, she understands why.

He rented not just a venue hall but a theater hall.

Easily, she can see the table full of gifts on one end of the stage, and the three other instruments on the other.

But what holds her breath is the black grand piano positioned at the middle.

Her heart speeds up and she looks at him in confusion and nervousness.

"Baby, are you going to ask me to play?"

Kai softens, watching her expression. He lifts her hand to his lips and kisses her knuckles, the one that wears his ring, before he guides her to one of the seats in front. "I won't. I told you I won't anymore. Make yourself comfortable. Today, you're the audience."

Her eyes widen in realization as the meaning of his words register.

"You mean...?"

"But don't judge me, alright? It's a basic piece. Ito lang kinaya kong aralin at 'di ko rin natutunan nang tama. It's crap but I still want to try."

Milly doesn't know what's louder.

His footsteps or the pounding of her heart as Kai walks up to the stage and takes his seat by the piano.

"Una kong inaral 'to no'ng naghiwalay tayo. No'ng una, dahil lang 'di kita makalimutan. Lagi kong inaaral dahil gustong-gusto kita makita pero hindi pwede. After we met again, and after you told me about your birthday, I decided to take it seriously. I hired a teacher. Kaya ako nag-LOA. Kaya rin sinabihan kita na 'di muna kita makikita. I've been practicing." He looks back at her from the stage, and Milly clutches the skirt of her dress, unable to believe what's happening. "Happy birthday, Milly. Happy December first."

When the first note resonates, and the rest of the melody and harmony follow, Milly listens with bated breath as he plays the second movement of Pathetique Sonata with, maybe not as perfect rhythm, but careful and emotive interpretation.

It is as he said, a basic arrangement of a more complex piece, but Milly can't even hear the lapses and spaces between the notes. Only the emotions. Only the effort. Only the sincerity.

She looks at Kai playing, and she hears music.

She looks at Kai playing, and she sees Maestra smiling at her.

She looks at Kai playing, and she remembers herself. The one she abandoned.

She watches him with rapt concentration as if he's the only one she can see. Tears obscure her view as the piece concludes.

How long did he practice this for?

She tries to imagine him poring over the sheet music, trying to learn, trying to perfect the piece. Getting frustrated. Starting over and over again until he gets satisfied. Just like how she did when she first tried learning this piece at the age of ten.

Kai takes a breath and looks at her again.

Milly doesn't bother wiping the tears that fall from her eyes.

She's stunned. Speechless.

She can't remember the last time she cried for anyone or anything.

All she knows is she feels so much, so fucking much, for this man right now.

Her Kai.

Kairos.

Her right time.

"There's one more. But..." He sighs and goes on to play the first section, the focus and determination pressing down his brows, and another sigh escapes his lips when he fumbles on one key.

Milly finally stands when he makes a complete stop.

In a breath, she's running up the stage and rushing into his arms just as he gets up to receive her.

Tightly, she pulls him to herself, as if they can be one by doing so. If she can weave him into the fabric of her whole being, she would. If she can have him forever, she would.

But she can't.

This is as good as it gets.

"You were great. You were so great, baby. That was so great," she says on repeat.

But Kai sighs, his arms still warm and secure around her body. "I'm sorry I fucked it up."

"No, baby. You were so great. I felt it. Your intention. The thoughts and effort you put into this. For a non-pianist, I know how hard it must have been for you. I love it. Thank you."

She feels the press of his palm against the back of her head, brushing her hair.

"You're crying. Let me see you."

"Let's stay like this muna. If you move, I'll be tempted to kiss you. I just wanna... feel you right now, baby."

Kai stills and takes a breath.

"You liked it? Even though I fucked it up?"

"I couldn't even hear the technicalities. Just your feelings. I was too taken by the thought that you were playing. For me."

"May isa pa. I will be a lot better in this one because for some reason, the guitar is easier for me. Maybe because I learned it first."

She pulls away from him, blinking in confusion.

Kai wipes her tears away before he turns to the left side of the stage, where a painted violin, a glass cello, and two guitars are displayed.

Crossing the distance, he grabs the plain brown guitar with one hand and a stool with another and gestures for Milly to sit on the vacant one.

Then he goes back to her and positions himself beside her, adjusting the guitar between his arms. When he starts strumming, a fresh wave of nervous excitement rushes through her body.

"I knew I was going to fuck up your piano so I prepared something else in case."

Kai breathes in again, and the chords of Heaven starts to fill and echo around the hall.

His eyes stay rooted on the guitar as he plays the first part, from time to time moving up to catch her gaze. When he smiles at her in the middle of the song, Milly can swear the world has stopped spinning in its axis and has begun turning inside her chest because of the way her heart has been dipping, soaring, sinking, and somersaulting with every strum he makes.

She's breathless when the song finishes, and Kai's looking at her expectantly, waiting for her reaction.

But she can't say anything.

He's held all her thoughts captive, and all she can think of is Kai.

Kai. Kai. Kai.

All Kai.

Kai reaches a hand forward to wipe another tear that she didn't realize has fallen down her face.

So what if her mother has forgotten her?

Right in front of her is someone infinitely more special, and she's not passing up the chance to be in this moment with him.

This is the first birthday she celebrated properly in years and she couldn't have chosen a better person to spend it with.

"Can I use the spare guitar?" she asks after she collects herself and swallows the lump in her throat. "I want to play din."

Kai turns to the black guitar. The one with white flowers painted on the body.

"You can have that. It's yours."

She blinks. "What?"

"All of that is yours."

"What do you mean..." For the first time, her eyes roam around the stage, and she instinctively gets up to her feet to get a closer look at them.

There's a glass cello, a white violin with a blue rose design and her name painted on the body, a clear electric guitar likely made with resin with dried flowers decorated within.

There's many more on the table.

Prism wind chimes. Customized alpaca and strawberry mugs. A violin-shaped decanter. A piano-shaped music box.

When Milly walks closer to the table, Kai following not far behind, she sees the others better.

Anklets, explosion box, snow globes, lamp shades, music charm bracelets, vinyl. If she'd count them all, they're more than twenty gifts in total.

"Kai, bakit ganito karami?"

"I couldn't choose, so I decided to get them all."

She blinks at him. "Pero sobrang dami pa rin."

"Walang sobra kung para sa 'yo. It's for all the birthdays I missed. For all the birthdays you didn't celebrate and I wasn't able to spend with you."

Milly looks at him in disbelief. "Kai, I..." she tries but fails because what else can she say?

No words can describe how overwhelmed and happy she feels right now.

But Kai knows.

Somehow, he always has a way of knowing what words fail to express for her.

Gently, he pulls her closer.

"'Di lang 'yan. I still have two more. Come here," he's saying as he fishes out a velvet box from his pocket. When he opens the lid, a golden-colored north star necklace greets her. Kai takes it out and fastens it around her neck. "Make a wish, Milly."

Her heart jumps, and her eyes sting again, then she's back in his arms, losing herself and all of her feelings unto him again.

"Baby, this is already a lot. What more can I wish for? Sobra na 'to. Sobra pa sa sobra."

For a time, they stay like that in comfortable silence. Milly tearing up in his arms, Kai making soothing circles on her back.

When she finally calms down, he leans away to wipe the tears in her eyes.

"Walang sobra 'pag ikaw. I'm all in, Milly. When I agreed to be with you, I decided to give you everything I can. This is it kaya masanay ka na." He adds, "May isa pa. Ready?"

She nods slowly in anticipation.

He pulls out another box from his pocket, and out of it comes a plain gold ring. Right away, she can see the sheet music inscribed on the surface of the band.

Kai places the ring onto her palm and she trails her eyes down to check the notes closely. "What piece is this?"

"Rachmaninoff. Your favorite, sabi mo. Pumili lang ako ng madaling part."

She gets why. Rach 2 is a complex arrangement and there's no way a small ring can fit her favorite part.

"Look underneath."

Milly complies and another breath comes out of her lips as soon as she reads what's written.

1:11.

She looks up at Kai again.

"1:11?"

"Yeah, 1:11. You and me," he says as he slides it on her ring finger.

"Baby..." she starts, unsure what to say, eyes cutting between him and the ring in surprise. "Thank you so much. I don't know what else to say. I feel like my chest's going to burst open right now. Can I..." Milly clears her throat and eyes the spare black guitar. "Can I play what I feel instead? Can you play again, baby? I want to play with you."

"Of course. Whatever you want, I'll give you."

Kai takes the guitar again and sits back down.

Giving the necklace and the ring one last look, Milly wipes the remaining tears from her eyes and picks up the guitar from the stand. Sitting beside him, she strums and gives him a signal.

Kai plays as he did earlier and Milly plays the back-up chords. Kai makes a half smile when she begins to sing the lyrics gently.

Oh, thinkin' about all our younger years
There was only you and me
We were young and wild and free
Now nothin' can take you away from me
We've been down that road before
But that's over now
You keep me comin' back for more

Baby, you're all that I want
When you're lyin' here in my arms
I'm findin' it hard to believe
We're in heaven

And love is all that I need
And I found it there in your heart
It isn't too hard to see
We're in heaven

She doesn't know why Kai chose this song out of all the choices out there, but it couldn't be more perfect to describe how she feels right now.

His eyes find hers, and she smiles as she sings the second verse. Kai's humming along with her, the first time he's ever done so, which makes this moment increasingly more special by the second.

Oh, once in your life you find someone
Who will turn your world around
Bring you up when you're feelin' down
Yeah, nothin' could change what you mean to me

Oh, there's lots that I could say
But just hold me now
'Cause our love will light the way

And, baby, you're all that I want
When you're lyin' here in my arms
I'm findin' it hard to believe
We're in heaven

Yeah, love is all that I need
And I found it there in your heart
It isn't too hard to see
We're in heaven

There's comfortable silence as the song concludes and the guitar strings come to a stop.

Seconds and minutes pass by. Her gaze lingers on him and the guitar and the moment they just shared.

Saying she's tongue-tied is putting it mildly. Dumbstruck is not even close to explaining how he's making her feel.

She's still lost... suspended... in this time.

In him.

In them.

To the point that it almost feels like he's stolen all of her capacity to think and formulate words, and all that's left in its wake are the feelings.

Feelings she thought she'd never get to experience in this lifetime.

Joy and acceptance.

Belongingness.

Appreciation.

All of these myriad of feelings she can't put a name to, all for one man and all because of one man.

Kai mentioned before that he was never interested in music. The fact that he's here, doing all of this for her, unravels so much of her thoughts that she hasn't given much of her time before.

Milly runs her fingers down the body of the guitar. "Can I tell you a secret?"

Kai arches his brows, prodding her to continue.

"This is going to be so toxic of me but I wanna let it out sana. Sometimes, I get jealous when I remember you and your ex. The guitar kinda reminded me of your history with her. I know it's wrong but sometimes, I get jealous that she met you first and you had her first. That she taught you music and did so many things together," she pauses. "I get jealous thinking... that you loved her first.

"I wish I met you much earlier so I wouldn't have had to... play around," she continues. "I had a lot of firsts with you. I guess I'm just jealous that I'm not yours. A part of me don't care naman 'cause that part of your life is over now. You're with me now and that's what's important.

"I understand too that we can't help our past and she'll always be a vital part of your life. I respect that. My history was more complex nga. I don't think she's the issue. I guess I'm just jealous that it wasn't me. I can't help but think. Maybe if I'd gotten more involved in Lolo's businesses. Maybe one way or another we could've met sooner. I could've liked you sooner. We could've been happier together sooner. We could've had this sooner."

Kai is quiet for a while.

Then he brings the guitar down, reaches for her, and takes her to his lap. Milly puts the guitar down as well.

"Thank you for telling me that," he starts, placing a strand of her hair back in her ear. "Milly. I met you at the right time. If you had met me at a different time, a different me, I wouldn't have been ready for you. Back then, I wasn't ready for a committed relationship. My priority was to get away from my parents' control and build my life. I wouldn't have been ready to accept what I feel. Itong ngayon? This is right. We met at the right time. Malayo na ko kina Mama. Nakakapag-isip na ko para sa sarili ko. Nakakapagdesisyon na 'ko. May panahon at tamang pag-iisip na rin ako para maging bukas sa iba."

"But you were in a relationship before. Committed ka rin naman noon, 'di ba?"

"Why do you think it failed? 'Di lang naman siya ang nagkulang. Pati ako. I couldn't love her the way I should have."

Another beat of silence.

"I'm sorry for being unreasonable and unfair, baby. I just wanted to be honest with you."

"No need to apologize. Ako rin naman nagselos sa mga unang nakakilala sayo. I guess it's normal to feel this way."

"How was it pala? Were you able to talk to your friends?"

"Seth took it well. You were right. He expected it. Geff... nagulat. Nainis. But we talked it over. Ayos na ngayon."

"How do you feel about that? Having to have those conversations just for me?"

"I did it out of respect for the friendship. Frankly, I don't think I need to explain myself to anyone."

She tilts her head. "Does it bother you that I was with your friends?"

Kai smiles at her question. "Not anymore. Sa 'kin ka na. I really don't care about the past anymore. Apart from my mistake, I don't want to change anything. Would I have met you if not for our history? Would we have gotten to this point if not for what happened in the past? 'Di ko alam. It's hard to imagine."

Milly lifts her fingers up to his cheek. "Don't you wish we met at a much simpler circumstance? You know, yung 'di ka nainis sa 'kin?"

"Why? Would you have been attracted to me if we didn't start wrong?"

Milly thinks it over. "I don't know. Maybe. I think so. I think I will. You're hot. You're mysterious. Kahit naman 'di mo ko awayin, I would still get curious of you and kung makakausap kita, I would easily understand that you're also dependable. I don't know. Maybe because I'm speaking from hindsight, but liking you, Kai, feels like an eventuality I'll always keep coming to no matter the start."

He kisses her forehead. "'Di na natin mababago yung nangyari na. Let's stop thinking about the what-ifs. Ang mahalaga sa 'kin, nandito ka sa 'kin. In case you don't know, I also have a lot of firsts with you."

"Oh? Like what?"

He smirks. "Quite a lot, if you ask me."

He trails his thumb across her lips. "I don't really bed women I'm not in a relationship with but you drive me so mad that I needed to have you. You know how that ended."

Up to her cheek. "For once in my life, I want to stop working just to have more time with you."

To her left eye. "For the first time, I begged a woman to choose me."

Then to her right eye. "I was willing to share. Just to have you. It's the first time I ever wanted someone like that."

He leans to her ear. "Of course, we have more firsts in bed," he whispers as he squeezes her knee.

She smiles, getting high in the emotions.

He leans away and kisses her knuckles.

"First time I wanted to learn music and regretted not trying earlier."

Her palm. "First time I broke my friends' trust."

"First time someone saw..."

Her brows raise, waiting for him to complete that, but he shakes his head.

"First time I was willing to forget my principles because you were more important to me," he says and finishes it off with a kiss on the lips. "This is the most I've done for anyone and it's all because you met me at a time when I was already ready to give myself to someone. I thought I wasn't yet. But turns out I am."

"You made me realize that I'm ready. I'm breaking so many rules. And I don't mind. Because I want you. I want to have you.

"You taught me not to judge anyone by appearance alone. You taught me so many things that reframed how I deal with people now. You made me understand people that are too different from me.

"Most of all, you taught me how to feel again. Kalimutan na natin yung nakaraan. Let's focus on what we have right now. Alright?"

Milly presses her forehead against his. "Okay."

Kai kisses the underside of her wrist and smiles against her skin. "Can you play again?"

"What do you want?"

"The cello."

"Any specific request?"

She expects no reply but when Kai nods and fishes out his phone, her brows rise up in surprise.

"You want the Swan?"

"Something else. This one."

He shows the title to her. Arioso. From Cantata 156 by Bach.

"How do you know this piece?"

Kai starts chuckling.

"It's as you said. I developed a taste for classical music kakapatugtog ko. 'Yan na lang pinapakinggan ko ngayon."

Milly laughs lightly at his admission.

"Really? And you liked this piece? I've only played this four times though. I already forgot the notes. Jog my memory a bit. Can you search if there's a sheet music available online?"

"Meron. I have it here."

He really does. He came prepared. The sheet music was saved in his phone, and Milly's both surprised and moved that Kai had gone this far just to try to understand her own passion.

After a few minutes, she returns the phone back to him.

"I remember now. I'll let muscle memory fill in the gaps na lang. This might not be perfect though."

So she says, but it's as if her body is moving on its own. As soon as she sits down and places the cello between her knees, she becomes one with it.

Eyes focused, she breathes in and slides the bow across the strings, the low notes immediately filling the silence of the theater room.

All throughout the performance, Kai's eyes never left hers.

She stifles a grin, remembering the first time she played for him. "Fallen in love with me again?" she repeats, a callback to that day.

Kai's forehead creases. He doesn't answer.

The complete admiration in which he looks at her doesn't waver when he stops her midway and leans down to capture her lips.

"What's that for?" she asks when he's done.

"That one is for being mine," he says and then he's leaning down again, mouth hovering only inches away from her. "And this one, for being too beautiful."

When the second kiss comes, a series of fireworks lights up in her chest.

Maybe this is their thing right from the start.

What words can't deliver, they fill in with their actions.

💝 💛 💙

happy 400k, millykai <3

we're already at the start of the new and longest arc of this story. so expect more angst and heavier emotions this time ~

thanks!

Milly's cello performance:

[Dapat mayroong isang GIF o video rito. I-update na ang app ngayon upang makita ito.]